There might be a gas leak at Dodge HQ in Sterling Heights, Michigan. That’s the only conclusion I can reach after reading the company’s latest press release, announcing the “Dodge Badassador Program.” No, I didn’t make that up, and yes, it does sound like it could just as easily be an outreach program for people with frequent hemorrhoids as anything else.
It’s not a joke. This is a very legitimate press release about Dodge’s search for new Badassadors. “What the hell is that?” would be your perfectly reasonable response. According to the automaker, a Badassador is “a brand ambassador with a Dodge attitude.” Ok, sure, if you put it that way. This is in line with historical precedent, like Plymouth’s Envoyagers or Subaru’s ill-fated DiploBRATS.
This feels like a very post-Carlos Tavares change and part of the company’s new mission to make its American brand more American and less French. You could imagine that under Tavares the program would have been called Chargérs d’affaires.
It makes sense that Dodge is looking for badass people to represent its muscly, tire-smokin’ ethos. Regardless, I think if I called someone a “Badassador” in a bar, there’s a fair chance they’d try and punch me in the face. This is what Dodge is going with, though, so let’s explore what being a Badassador is all about.
The role of Dodge Badassadors… I’m sorry? It sounds like the name of the best cowboy stripper in Vegas, not someone hired to represent a car company. Anyway, the Badassadors will be popping up around the country, talking to people about Dodge in person and online. Assless chaps would be a fitting uniform, but they’ll presumably be keeping their clothes on while they represent Dodge at drag races, vehicle launches, auto shows, and the like.
Kid you not, though, this thing goes all the way to the top. Dodge CEO Matt McAlear is fully aware of this effort. “If Dodge isn’t pushing boundaries, if Dodge isn’t making people uncomfortable, we wouldn’t be Dodge, and those are the kind of ambassadors the brand is looking for: Enthusiasts who disrupt, who will stand out and shine a light on the next generation of Dodge muscle,” said McAlear.
Mission Accomplished! You have definitely played on my typically reserved, and easily offended Australian sensibilities.
Being a Badassador comes with some perks, according to Dodge. You’ll get a Badassador Card, which gets you into various Dodge events. You’ll also get exclusive access to Dodge vehicles so you can make content, and Dodge also says you’ll get VIP experiences at events like vehicle launches and the like. Some Badassadors may even get to travel across the country to various shows. You’ll also score some Dodge swag, meet Dodge people, and appear on the company’s social media channels.
You’ll apparently “experience” all the best vehicles brand has to offer. Dodge specifically calls out the Charger Daytona R/T, the Durango SRT Hellcat, and the Dodge Hornet R/T with PowerShot. Yes, they mentioned the Hornet. Bet they’ll be lining up ’round the block for that one.
One thing Dodge didn’t mention? Money. There’s no word as to whether you actually get paid to be a Badassador. However, Dodge does note that you’ll “earn the opportunity to have your content shaerd on official Dodge platforms,” and that you can “advance your influencer status and experience.” To me, that sounds like the pay is somewhere around zero.
If you’re interested, Dodge has said they’re looking for “some next-level badassery here,” so you’ll want to bring the noise to the interview if you get one. They’re not necessarily aiming to work with existing personalities, either—instead, they’re hunting for passionate people who are enthusiastic about the brand.
Dodge hopes to recruit from a wide range of demographics—its words, not ours—though you have to be over 18 and a legal resident of the US to apply. If this all sounds like a fun adventure, you can head over to Dodge’s website and apply to be a card-carrying Badassador. Just be sure to write me back about the experience.
Joking aside, if Dodge starts building more vehicles that, uh, live up to the name they can call them the Plenumpotentiaries and we’ll be here for it.
Image credits: Dodge, Dodgegarage.com via screenshot
2025- The year of the absurd, where adolescent school yard mentality RULES.
Yeah, this reeks of toxic assculinity.
When ” I know you are, what am I” is a successful legal defense, I…I…
“FLOYD, YOU CAN’T TRIPLE STAMP A DOUBLE STAMP!!!”
It’s times like this that make me glad I’ve never owned a Dodge vehicle.
Yeah, me too… wait a second!
This comment makes me happier than it outta!
RIP SRT
It confirms why I don’t, won’t and didn’t
I always said that if I ever owned a Viper I would be sure to get a ’13-’14 model and then drive the Viper guys crazy by insisting on referring to it as an “SRT” all the time.
I feel like this is a contest straight out of the movie Idiocracy. Welcome to Costco. I love you.
I mean, we’re basically in Idiocracy now. This was just one more step.
President Cheeto Camacho agrees bigly. He’s got what morons crave.
But does he have electrolytes?
If only California would turn on the valves and let the electrolytes flow and put out those fires
So THAT’S what California is doing wrong.
What do you think is in the pink stuff they dump on fires?
So you want to put water on the fires. Water – like out the toilet?
So maybe this is Dodge’s poor attempt to give something to do for the turd sons of the big Cheeto?
It started in 2016 and just brought to the next level
Dodge mistakenly seems to think that the Venn Diagram of people that post pictures of their lunch to Instagram and people that roll their cigarette pack in the sleeve of their t shirt has some overlap.
I would have said “tucked blunt/vape into flat-brimmed hat” but same general idea.
“Miss me yet?” –Dr. Z
No lie, my first read on the headline was Badassodor, which, ew.
Maybe it’s my age, but I’m far more likely to associate a Badassador with Cologuard, than Dodge.
As a Badassador wouldn’t you be more of an effluencer than an influencer?
Finally, if you are a bad ass, wouldn’t you have a dodgy attitude rather than a Dodge one?
“Badassodor is the testosterone suppliment you’ve been looking for. Regain your manhood today”*
*Badassador is not a replacement for actual human contact. Known side effects for Badassador include regret and lonliness. Please consult your doctor before using
Bravo for effluencer!
So stealing that.
“As a Badassador wouldn’t you be more of an effluencer than an influencer?”
This is gold! – COTD
It sounds a lot like something FCA would have done ~10 years ago like when they launched the Renegade with an X Ambassadors song of the same name. (Do they have a new album coming out? X Badassadors?)
It was sounding more like an influencer but it just sounds like an internship on how to be an influencer and is close to the startup-culture language, just Dodge-y. “Looking for people to work in a fast-paced environment! You will work on a dyno-mic team! Candidates must thriEV under pressure!!”
So goddamn cringe
“Did you propose to your girlfriend at your sister’s wedding and get rejected? Did you scream at the Taco Bell cashier and make her cry for not getting you a cheeseburger? Did you call the cops on a little old lady walking her dog too close to your property? You might just be cringe enough to be a Dodge Badassador!”
So this was the title they went with?
I was hoping for “Probable Cosplay”
“probable cost to play” is more like it. Not only will they not pay you, this will cost you money somehow.
How about “Under the Influencers”? :)I’m only half joking, though. We rag on Nissan a lot, but 90% of Nissan drivers are people you’ll never notice. 90% of Dodge drivers, you can’t miss.
So you’re unable to dodge the Dodge owners?
Well, they split RAM off from the main brand for a reason. It’s a subtle yet important distinction 🙂
Pete Hegseth would like to apply.
But he’s busy being sober now.
This is the dumbest name I’ve ever heard and I have a friend whose nickname is “Uncle Toilet”.
Much like the Badassadors, I want to ask but I’m afraid of the answer.
Story time pls.
Uncle Toilet curses a lot and says some vile, albeit hilarious stuff. Our friend’s kid made mention of his potty-mouth and Uncle Jim became Uncle Toilet.
That’s a great name, actually. Unless you’re the friend.
I see your nickname and raise you a man with the legal name of “Cactus”.
Do the youngsters call him “Uncle Skibidi”?
Though I’m not entirely sure if they did an offsite Dodge brand HQ like Cadillac tried once in NY, Stellantis NA HQ is in Auburn Hills, not Sterling Heights.
Came here to say this. Dodge is definitely within the Tech Center/HQ in Auburn Hills.
Their facilities in Sterling Heights are an assembly plant (making the RAM 1500) and a stamping plant.
Oh my actual God please just shut up with the stupid Vin Diesel cosplay-ass branding already and JUST. BUILD. CARS. Holy shit this company should be nuked from orbit.
It’s the only way to be sure
Here at Dodge, you’re family.
But like, one of those families where the kids move out and never talk to their parents again.
At dodge your mom is also your aunt.
That’s what kind of family vibe dodge has
And here I thought Dodge was the family where Jr moved back into Mom’s basement because he couldn’t afford the payments on his Charger R/T and his mobile home anymore since his GF moved out after he hit her.
That guy’s kids probably won’t call him either.
Requirements include willingness to add $5,000-$10,000 of negative equity to a new 84-month loan, written agreement to use marijuana-scented air purifier in the vehicle, and requirement to leave yellow shipping protectors on front lip for duration of Badassador program.
Student and Military discounts available, but we know you two groups probably already bought a WRX.
I have a confession.
If it were a paint accent – not the actual plastic shipping protectors – I wouldn’t hate that trend. I think it’s a fun little detail. As it is, it’s car bra dumb. How would you like to trap grit and filth and sand your paint down to nothing?
100%. I’m still waiting for big, white plastic sheeting to start being put on hoods. Because if we want everything to look like it just rolled off a car carrier, you gotta commit.
Tesla came real close with their wheel-protecting shuriken on the CyberTruck.
..wait, you weren’t supposed to remove those on delivery?
Hey Lewin, just so you know, all chaps are assless. You’re supposed to wear pants under them, tho.
Who let you out of the camper sub-compartment?
I was having this discussion with a buddy yesterday:
“Assless chaps” is redundant.
Unless we’re talking about a number of British guys who really need to stop skipping leg day…
Truth.
But I feel like the phrase “assless chaps” implies there are NOT pants on underneath. At least, to me.
Those capable of intellectually stimulating conversation need not apply.
Or any conversation.
For all we know those grunting sounds they make when you put a bunch of them together might actually be language
Wouldn’t that be the French, though?
Can we talk benefits?
Do I have to bring my own Punisher decals or will those be provided? What flavors of vape juice do you keep at the office? Can I put UFC pay-per-views on my expense reports?
This appeals directly to the type of person who says “You need to turn in your man card”.
I heard that you should have some assault charges on your record too, helps with street cred or something like that.
The judge says I can’t have my license back for like 6 more months. Is that cool?
Badassador is the naming equivalent of the fratzonic exhaust: Just as fake as it is stupid
That’s the new name of the button. Top individuals are working on a way to cram that text on a button as we speak.
I’m just saying, you could wear a shirt that says “Tiny Penis” and sacrifice less dignity
Obvious jokes aside, can this even work? I fell like most everyone who already wanted to hoon an R/T already bought one. Is this actually likely to increase sales for them? Is this just going to expose further the gaping holes in their lineup and age of their platforms?
current owners are really just a couple skipped child support payments away from a down payment on a new one. They gotta keep the pipeline primed and ready.
It seems like just keeping the base trim seats on every model would have been a cheaper way to make people uncomfortable.
Advance my influencer status? My word, this is what I’ve always desired.
All those horses left the power barn long ago, and the echos have faded to mere whispers of a sort of legendary past. Only the thrash of failing lifters remains…
Why wouldn’t they just post the hiring link on the Florida Unemployment page?
Because their ideal badassador can’t read.
If Dodge can’t be dumb and ridiculous, what could they be?
This is being Dodge to the e, even with the Hornet R/T. Probably the 2nd worst hybrid, only the Pacifica is worse.
Don’t forget the first generation of half-assed hybrids. Aspen, maybe?
Most people don’t even know they (Durango/Aspen) existed, and even if they did, they sold in very small quantities. Even the Hornet has sold more as a hybrid then those two bastards.
Candidate: “It’s not as bad as I thought it would be…”
Dodge: “Wow! That’s the best response we’ve had so far! You’re hired!”
I could be a great Badassador, as I’m bad at most things. Alas, I’m Canadian.
“ if Dodge isn’t making people uncomfortable, we wouldn’t be Dodge”
Well, that certainly explains why the Hornet is part of the lineup.
The Hornet is impressive for making two groups of people uncomfortable at the same time: the dealers because they can’t sell them, and the few customers as they wait for the tow truck.
That’s the unity Dodge wants! If people are uncomfortable on both sides of the sales desk, then there’s common ground.