Good morning! Well, you knew if we were talking about zombie movies that an RV or a school bus would eventually have to enter the picture. So today, we’re looking at one of each. What better way to evacuate that hapless band of survivors huddling in the back of a 7-Eleven, right?
Our mission yesterday was efficiency, getting the most out of every precious drop of guzzoline, and it seems that the Chevy Volt was nearly universally your choice to do so. I can’t say I disagree. It can run on battery power alone if need be, and it’s probably the more reliable of the two. The Altima, however, will look great as smashed-up set dressing in a parking lot somewhere.
Also, I just want to say something really quick: I meant for this whole post-apocalyptic thing to be fun and light-hearted, which may have been a miscalculation on my part. I’ve noticed the comments taking a pretty dark tone this week, and maybe I should have read the room better. Please do keep in mind that this is all theoretical, and “For Entertainment Purposes Only,” as they say. Let’s just try to have some fun with it.
Moving on: It seems to me that if ever there was a time for carpooling and ride-sharing, it’s the end of the world. It’s also not a terrible idea, if you’re fleeing hordes of the undead or whatever, to be able to bring a place to live with you. A motorhome seems like an ideal solution. But technically, you can make a motorhome out of just about any vehicle big enough, like, say, an old school bus with all the seats stripped out. I’ve got one of each for you to look at today.
1997 Safari Trek Class A RV – $9,950
Engine/drivetrain: 7.4-liter overhead valve V8, four-speed automatic, RWD
Location: Tacoma, WA
Odometer reading: 77,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
You know, I’ve never really understood the appeal of great big motorhomes like this. I mean, sure, it has all the comforts of home – but so does a Holiday Inn. I suppose I can see some value in being self-contained, but unless you tow a small car as a dinghy, you’re pretty much stuck at the campground until it’s time to go home. And who wants to try to maneuver a one-bedroom apartment around, anyway? My old neighbor back in Portland had one and he used it all the time, though, so maybe I’m missing something?
Anyway, what we have here is a 28-foot Class A motorhome, built on a Chevy truck chassis and powered by a big-block 454 cubic inch V8 backed by a 4L80E automatic transmission. It’s not going to be the most efficient thing around, of course, but it should be reliable, and parts shouldn’t be a problem to find. It has 77,000 miles on the clock, which would be low for a car, but seems like a lot for a motorhome. Someone got their use out of this one. The seller says it runs great, but doesn’t go into any details about its history.
It’s got everything you could possibly need, though: a full bathroom, a kitchen, a roof-mounted air conditioner, a generator, and a propane furnace. It even has a cool bed that lowers down from the ceiling! See those tracks mounted on the walls in the photo above? That’s where it comes down from. It’s decorated like an extended-stay apartment from the early ’90s, but hey, if you’re trying to live off the grid when there’s no grid left to speak of, interior design is probably the least of your worries.
Our resident RV expert, Mercedes, has lamented the poor build quality of modern RVs before, but from what I hear, she’d be pleasantly surprised with this one. In researching this RV, I saw phrases like “high quality” and “built like a tank” come up. The outer skin is riveted aluminum, not fiberglass, and you won’t find any particle-board woodwork in here. And for our scenario, you should probably choose the strongest RV you can find.
2014 Blue Bird Vision school bus – $9,500
Engine/drivetrain: Propane-fueled 6.8-liter overhead cam V10, six-speed automatic, RWD
Location: Hillsboro, OR
Odometer reading: 76,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
Here is a vehicle most of us have ridden in at one time or another, and chances are pretty good it was made by Blue Bird. In fact, off the top of my head, I can’t think of another school bus manufacturer. The one I remember from my school days was nowhere near this sleek-looking, though. This slope-nosed Vision model was introduced in 2003, and is still produced today, with a few changes under the skin along the way.
The Vision came with a whole bunch of different engines over the years: a Caterpillar turbodiesel, then a Cummins turbodiesel, then a GM 8100 Vortec V8. By the time this one was built, the 8100 was out of production, and Blue Bird had switched to Ford’s 6.8 liter Triton V10. It has one major difference from the V10 found in your typical Super Duty pickup, however; Blue Bird buses run on propane. It’s cheaper than gasoline, and – more important – it doesn’t go bad. It’s backed by a Ford six-speed automatic, and the seller says it runs and drives great.
This Blue Bird’s kid-carrying days are long behind it, and those green vinyl seats are nowhere to be found. In their place are a set of bunk beds along one side, and a kitchen counter along the other. The seller didn’t finish the RV conversion, so there’s plenty left to do, but that means you can do it however you want. It has a power inverter, a fridge, and a sink, and the seller will include solar panels, an AC unit, and a stove for a little extra.
It looks like the windows are tinted, which helps, but you’d be wise to go ahead and black them out. And maybe cover them with chicken wire or something. And whatever you do, do not lower the windows below the line, especially when there are zombies around.
Big, self-sufficient vehicles like these could be a big help in our hypothetical scenario. You can move a lot of people, and pack it full of supplies so you can get yourself hidden and stay there. One of these is fully-equipped with everything you need, but the other runs on a different fuel than the stuff everyone else will be looking for. Which one seems like a better way to go?
If the bus wasn’t V10 Triton or propane, I’d go with that.
If the S really HTF and the power grid goes down, you could use a hand pump to get gasoline or Diesel out of a station’s underground tanks. How are you going to get compressed propane?
Either would be great converted into plug-in hybrids with a massive 2kW solar array on the roof.
A double-ended shaft version of the Netgain WarP 13″ series DC motor could be coupled directly to the differential, and these motors can be coupled together on the same shaft as long as the shaft is strong enough, with the driveshaft shortened to accommodate. You’d be able to run on electric only, engine only, or both, and when paired with a Cafe Electric Zilla 2k controller or Soliton Shiva, having two or more of these motors would give you 500+ peak horsepower/3000+ peak lb-ft torque minimum from the electric system alone.
Expect energy consumption around 1 kWh/mile on electric-only and size the battery pack accordingly.
And imagine being able to park for a week and charge up a salvaged Tesla Model S pack to run it all, and go another 50-100 miles without needing any fuel. While having the ability to accelerate like a dragster.
Schoolie.
More gun ports; Escape hatch out the back; Better front end for smashing through road blocks; Just so, so many reasons…
Fuck those school bus conversions. 100s of pounds of plywood and lumber coming along at 55mph 6 feet behind me gives me the heebie jeebies.
I’m aware a regular RV isn’t somehow a lot better. But “I threw some 2×4’s in back in the shape of a bunk bed, now it’s a camper!” just does not fill me with crash safety comfort.
I’ve seen a good number of RV wrecks over the years and even back in the 80s, RVs disassembled themselves fairly easy in harder collisions. I think structurally, the bus would win, but neither would give me safe feelings in a more severe wreck.
I mean if you don’t trust the work rip it out and start again.
It’s not like RVs are crash tested and I’d trust the structural integrity of a school bus FAR more than an RV, even one that was built when there was some slimmer of quality.
In past times, a decently built class A motor home would be my choice, but for the end of times, I’m going with extreme durability and ground clearance. I imagine it could be modified to run on either propane or gasoline without too much trouble?
RVs are just big zombie tuna cans. The biggest drawback to the school bus is that you have to stop for railroad crossings, but otherwise they’re tanks. Rather have a Thomas D-type than the Bluebird, but beggars can’t be choosers.
The thought of still stopping at train tracks during an apocalypse makes me giggle. There’s a whole horde behind you and you still stop, open the door, and look for a train you know isn’t coming.
Both have a few too many windows, but the big guy here has no hood to crawl up, and I could see converting the awning to a steel roll up door to cover 2 windows and flimsy entrance door… but the Propane Bus is really the right choice. As BA Barracus would tell, you that thing is only a few booger welds and a Montage away from being a literal tank. and it would in theory be useful for longer.
I would rather take the fancy 454 powered thing, but I would probably take the yellow bus in the end.
Just on durability alone, the schoolbus wins. Post apocalypse survival relies on being alert and aware, a soft comfy bed breeds complacency, complacency breeds getting ambushed.
If I were going for comfort, I’d choose the RV. It looks to be built well enough to be a nice pad and its interior is far better than that skoolie. The next question then becomes about the type of apocalypse. If we’re talking I Am Legend kind of stuff where you could more or less freely roam by day, I’d take the RV. Just put giant steel hatches over the windows for nighttime and as the kids say, you’re “Gucci.”
But if we’re talking about zombies, Mad Max, or some other kind of super violent thing, the school bus wins. While this specific RV may be built well enough for recreation, it has terrible ground clearance and it’s still not as durable as that school bus. My only concern about the school bus is the availability of propane in the apocalypse? I’d rather have a diesel converted to run on waste oils. At least then you can raid every McDonald’s in America for fuel. Argh, but then you have the other problem in that waste oil tends to be heavy and freezes easily, which would suck in the winter months.
Maybe a multi-fuel school bus is the way. Get something that’ll run on any fluid that burns.
Plus the school bus has great parts availability. Every town you pass through will have a parking lot with at least a dozen if not hundreds of them parked side by side just waiting to be picked.
And every rural driveway will have a potential propane source.
I don’t think the kids are still saying this but I like to insist to my wife and the few youths I regularly encounter (teen girls) that they are. It usually gets a very strong eye roll
Sorry, Hank Hill, but propane (and propane accessories) ain’t gonna cut it. The versatility and reliability of a big-block Chevy is just too good to pass up.
In fact, swap the motors and I’ll take the bus.
Assuming the Zombie Apocalypse will be televised/filmed…need to have lots of windows for those scenes where zombies are clawing at the vehicle and passengers are terrified and the one seriously over testosteroned single male (ex marine) and overstressed divorced mom make mincemeat of the nearby zombies with a found cash of WW2 heavy machine guns (and surprisingly unlimited supply of ammo).
Cinematically…the RV simply does not work.
Bluebird (with some mods) for the win.
Ship the Oscar to my PO box.
That right there is the key. Collect a handful of different engine types to swap out as necessary. A schoolie just lends itself to all sorts of Mad Max Mayhem.
The admittedly fairly nice RV, on the other hand, is going to high center on the first rural train-track crossing. Plus, the comparatively plush interior will result in way too much comfort and thereby deep slumber. That’s just inviting the zombie hoards to sneak in and feast on your brains in the middle of the night. Restless nights are gonna keep you alive.
Alright, I’m double posting here, but I just clicked on the RV ad, and that seems to me like a cool damn RV. And I’ll tell you a story to explain why.
My uncle has an RV he bought used, and he was telling me all about it one day. He would take it to his daughter’s travelling volleyball games and to stuff like that. He told me how easy it was to park at the hotel. And I said, “Wait.. What? Why are you getting a hotel room when you have an RV?” He replied that what he liked about the RV was driving it places with his wife, if you got tired on the way you just traded places and rested on the couch for a while. Maybe you had to go to the bathroom, or wanted a snack out of the fridge. So that’s how he used it, as a day tripping vehicle that had all the amenities of home with you. He said he never even slept in it overnight once.
So I’m not an RV guy, my Dad’s always had boats instead. But I can completely see a use case for a day tripping RV. Something to take to the races and use as a base of operations, have your own food and a clean toilet. Stuff like that. What makes this particular RV great for this is there isn’t a big bedroom taking up half the space. Instead, you have the biggest bathroom I’ve ever seen in an RV of this class, and an actual shower, which is nice after a day out in the sun. If you really need to sleep in it, the bed is tucked out of the way in a setup I’ve never seen before but seems to me to be ideal.
Again, I’m not an RV guy but I can totally see having this. It looks really usable, in a real world way. And that’s a good price. It doesn’t fit so much with our apocalypse exercise but I’m voting for the RV.
I was leaning towards the bus until I saw it ran on Propane. The RV would be more comfortable for the end of days.
The bus because 99.9% of RVs are built worse than a tin shed from the ’70s.
Back in the 90s Safaris were actually built pretty well. Far better than modern RVs.
Shitbox Showdown: Mercedes Streeter Edition
It’s gotta be the bus. They’re way tougher, and have way more ground clearance. We’ve all been in one of those things that got the shit bashed out of it on all the curbs on the way to school, and it just took it like nothing happened.
I’m taking the bus. After the Apocalypse, I plan to join the Schoolie Gang, a bookwormish group of former students using their wits to survive in a post-apocalyptic landscape, driving up and down the coast, providing education to all the feral children. Along the way, we plan on stopping at as many zoos as possible in order to protect the Hippos from the tire iron-wielding evil bastards from the Altima gang. Hopefully, our charm and stores of knowledge will convince them to ditch their Altimas and stop tailgating people on mostly abandoned roads while chowing down on ill-gotten hippo meat.
Like the school bus, our society will be governed.
I’m genuinely looking forward to your book. Although, I’m not much of a reader, so I’ll probably wait for the movie to come out. Of course, movie ticket prices are ridiculous, so I’ll be waiting for it to stream. However, I only subscribe to one streaming service, so I’ll have to wait for it to make the rounds to that one. In summary, I really look forward to the movie based on your book that I’ll be able to watch 37 years from today.
I didn’t ride in school buses often, being a parent drop-off kid, but was in them enough on field trips to question whether they have any suspension at all. Going to the Field Museum and bumps on the lovely Chicago-area highways would bounce us clean off the seats.
How on earth do converted school bus RVs NOT shake the entire conversion materials to sawdust in a matter of miles? And for that matter, why on earth are school buses made out of medium duty truck chassis? Kids don’t weigh that much. I would think an extended airport shuttle-type thing built out of a Chevy Express would do just fine.
One design feature is the height so that in side impacts most vehicles will underride the school bus and the passengers are less vulnerable.
The bluebird is designed to survive abuse, serious abuse, the worst kind of abuse: children and government agencies.
RV’s are just built to be built.
“RV’s are just built to be built.”
Gadamn that is a succinct and perfect description.
Built to be built and built some more, I’d say.
I’ll take the bus. I saw an article recently about one that was hit pretty hard, and it was almost unscathed and all the kids came away uninjured. That bodes well for hitting Fury Road!
My school uses “International” (IC Bus) and Thomas School buses. I’ll take a school bus meant for daily abuse over an RV meant for occasional cruising.
Aren’t you all still looking for an Autopian RV?
Why not buy the Safari Trek, so I don’t have to?
If I’m going to have to choose…. School bus. Probably better engine and drivetrain since its meant to be used daily and haul tons of people. Better body and frame construction.