That’s right, for a tiny fraction of our readers it’s the new year! Because that tiny fraction includes myself, I get to make A Thing of it, which I intend to, so, happy Rosh Hashanah to all who celebrate or, as we Jews tend to say for our too-often somber holidays, “observe” it, or even those who just use it as a flimsy pretense to get off work. All are welcome. And for those of you who aren’t in that tiny fraction, happy new year you don’t care about to you as well! Everyone should have a fantastic 5785, whether they care or not, I say.
It’s tradition to start the new year with something sweet, and apples and honey are very traditional, hence that Corvair with apples in its trunk up there. That was actually featured in a Cold Start way back in late 2022, but it just fit too well here, so I brought it back.
That same post also featured a bunch of Eastern Bloc cars really, really crammed full of apples:
Damn, those people really aren’t taking any chances on having a sweet start to the new year. I wonder if opening the rear doors on those would just send apples cascading out, almost like a liquid, or are they so tightly packed they’d just stay frozen in place?
Anyway, the other part of this new year is that it’s now 5785, because we’ve been counting years a long-ass time. Since the days when we’d be scrolling clay cuneiform proto-Trello looking for reasonable apartments in Ur. Since 5785 makes me think of 1985, the only other “85” year I’ve experienced, let’s look quickly at one of the strangest 1985 carmmaker lineups I’ve seen:
This is Sevel’s 1985 linup. Sevel started as a joint venture from Fiat and Peugeot/Citroën in 1978, and eventually had a branch in Argentina, which is what we’re looking at here. Sevel built a mix of Fiats and Peugeots, but what really makes this special is that they also built Chevy C10 trucks under license.
That Chevy feels so out of place in this lineup, but somehow it’s also what makes this all work. I suppose unsurprisingly, Sevel got absorbed into Stellantis, though the Argentine branch was gone by 1999.
Anyway, I’m mostly off today, so I hope everyone has a fantastic start to 5785!
You had me spitting out my pomegranate seeds in laughter at that line, Torch.
Chag sameach. Shana yoter tova, given the shana we’ve just experienced.
Shana Tova U M’etuka to Torch and all my fellow Tribes people
WHERE ARE THE BOWL GAMES?????
Shana Tova t’chasev v’sechasem, l’altar, l’chaim ul’shalom!
This is pretty similar to how I pack my tupperware cabinet.
Happy New Year!*
*Let’s not even discuss how many human civilizations were underway and abandoned long before 5785. Gobekli Tepe, in Turkey is over what, 11,000 years old? If God created Adam and Eve 5,785 years ago, lord knows what golems and monstrosities were settling all around the world before this!
Shana Tovah!
Has it really been that long since God created the world? Wow, time flies…
Because it eventually all comes down to the Simpsons:
Rabbi Hyman Krustofski: Could you rephrase that as an ethical question?
Man Seeking Advice #2: Um… is it right to buy a Chrysler?
Rabbi Hyman Krustofski: Oh, yes. For great is the car with power steering and dyna-flow suspension.
Happy New Year!
This led me to learn that a “zone of pure doubt” exists in which Jewish authorities cannot agree on what day of the week is the appropriate Shabbat:
International date line in Judaism – Wikipedia
That’s very on-brand
“That same post also featured a bunch of Eastern Bloc cars really, really crammed full of apples”
Apropos of which, how do you like them beans? https://www.atticpaper.com/prodimages/012321/vw_beans.jpg
I LOVE BEANS! That’s excellent. New favorite ad.
In my childhood my family had a great math book, Mathematics, a Human Endeavor
a Textbook for Those Who Think They Don’t Like the Subject, by Harold Jacobs, with a tessellation of equestrians by M.C. Escher on the front cover, and it used that very same ad as a problem to solve in its chapter on calculating volume. Seriously cool! So that ad has always remained in my memory even if I don’t recall the solution as to how many beans it took to fill the bus 🙂
It’s my Birthday Bitches! I’m 58 today. Wish me a Happy New Year!
I celebrate my birthdays by remembering I am another year closer to death. In a good way, though!
If you were 57, or 85 today I would. But Hebrew is read right to left, so you’re good?
Now I don’t know what year it is.
Happy birthday!
Shana Tova Torch!
Hopefully you have a very sweet start to the year! Personally I’m hoping that my wife makes her delicious honey cake again!
My born again brother in law believes that the aforementioned calendar is dead accurate. We, who believe in symbolism and observe anyway, aren’t so sure. I’ve been served bagels older than that.
Shana Tovah!
Rabbi here — I feel seen.
שלום
L’Shana Tovah!
Happy Rosh Hashanah Jason and all the Jew Autops!
Fun (?) fact: one of the managers of the Argentine branch, and son of its owner, ended up becoming President in 2015. His term was a mixed bag, as that Sevel line up.
Fun (?) fact II: the center portion of the rear bumper of the Regatta Weekend folded down to increase the access to a massive cargo area, see: https://www.testdelayer.com.ar/pruebas/fiat-regatta/fiat-regatta-weekend.htm.
Enjoy your apples and honey, Torch!
Excellent (and objectively fun) facts!
I had completely forgotten about the Regatta Weekend, but one of the neighbours had one when I was growing up. The floppy bumper didn’t seem to add a whole lot of extra access but it was kinda cool just because it was weird.
More Argentine Fiat wagon fun facts; although the 128 sedan’s the only one shown here, Sevel also made a 128 5-door wagon that was available nowhere else in the world, the Italian 128 wagon having been a 3-door. (And is different from the Zastava 128 5-door hatchback.)
“Just gimme that old time religion …” and cars. Shanah tovah, Torch! (You have no idea how hard it was to resist typing Sha na na there.)
I know little of the Jewish Holidays, but I’m always up for a celebration and something sweet!
On a side-note, I would to propose that a new measurement unit be added to the lexicon:
A Lada
Usage example: Lokki brought a Lada apples to Jason’s New Year’s party.
Interestingly enough “One Lada” equals 5785 apples.
How do you like them apples?
So is this a volumetric measurement or a mass measurement? Metric or standard?
Well, uh, dunno. I AM advised though that one Lada makes enough delicious apple Seder to serve 10 people.
I don’t want to Rosh into making an ill-advised reply so I’ll Passover this opportunity, Bar-ring any last-minute ideas.
No we fry Ladas and serve them with applesauce and or sour cream. Maple syrup is for the beginners. Shana Tovah from the Wisconsin tribe. Not Cohens. Coldhens
This is what I love about The Autopian- A car site for us car nuts that ain’t straight WASP guys! Extra points for the Corvair- Drive Different!
When shopping for a new car do you ask the salesperson, “Is this a 5784 or a 5785?”
If you’re at a CJDR dealer, you might want to include 5783 in there.
I’m weighing the value of replacing our 5778 Pacifica Hybrid with a highly discounted 5783, newly purchased.
My cabriolet is from 5747
Just remember not to write “5784” on the check by accident.
Good strategy if you can get away with it!
The Hebrew calendar always sounds so futuristic. Like Dune being in the year 10,191.
Really takes the air out of the sails of those memes that purport someone to be living in the future for doing something smart.
“Lol, they think 3024 is so advanced? That’s so two millenia ago!”
Right? I enjoy that the most compelling scifi is usually set either in the not too distant future or in the way distant future. The middle scifi future is just kinda meh sometimes. We like either identifiable cars that can fly or people uncomprehendingly worshiping 20th century doomsday missiles, not just holograms and starships.
It’s always interesting to see how alternative transport is represented in movies. Ominously, I’m seeing way too much 1984 Now, both here and abroad.
“Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past.” “War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength.”
There are far worse quotes, but I don’t want to be a total party pooper.
Party Time! Excellent!
Me too. I remember enjoying how in ’00s YA dystopian stuff, there were always futuristic…trains. I liked the unusualness of that choice.
Musk’s vaguely trying to connect the Cybertruck with Blade Runner seems at odds with how the Blade Runner future isn’t exactly wonderful and prosperous – a few giant corporations control many things in our lives, there are potentially dangerous robots regularly running around, and it’s constantly raining (original) or snowing (2049) in LA.
Who controls the Cybertruck controls the fake-woodgrain-paneled Plymouth Reliant wagon?
Star Trek Discovery’s jump from 2258 to 3188 was quite jarring. Programmable matter! Personal transporters! Ships that morph like a transformer while in flight! Andorians and Orions working together!
I liked the new setting but I hate that every season is presented with apocalyptic stakes. Like just make the Emerald Chain the villains, we don’t need some magical force destroying planets too.
That’s one of the reasons I enjoy Dune esp – the technology is so foreign and advanced it’s at times scarcely recognizable. They’ve already gone through and come out the other side of a robot phase!
The truth is that if we saw regular people from 10,191 we would not understand anything about them. Language, culture, physical norms could all be so dramatically different that it would be like meeting an alien from another planet.