“It’s a historical artifact!” I just told my wife, Elise (Not Her Real Name). (Yes, I recently got married, and over the next two days I’ll be telling you more about how the wedding went; it was epic). For now, it’s time I enlist your help, because for some reason Elise seems entirely unconvinced that this BMW i3 display model’s historical significance is reason enough for us to buy it and store it in our small garage. How my argument didn’t work is beyond me, so we’re going to have to come up with some other clever way to convince her.
It’s been about a week since I got married, and things are great. She’s the greatest woman I’ve ever met, and I don’t even like driving to work anymore because that means I can’t hang out with her. But as great as things are, it’s become clear that married life is going to be very, very different than DT-single-life. Namely, I now have to get buy-in when I buy things.
Elise has actually been quite supportive of every car purchase I’ve ever made. In fact, she didn’t even have an issue with the entirely superfluous BMW i3 I nearly bought a few weeks ago right before our wedding — or that diesel F-250 that same week. Elise knows I’m passionate about cars, and she loves to see that passion blossom.
But this right here is going to be a tough sell.
For auction right now on Bring a Trailer are two full-scale display models — one of the i8 (which I’m not interested in, as cool as it is), and one of my beloved BMW i3, the Carbon Fiber Wonder from Leipzig. Apparently BMW sent full-size models of these two cars to dealerships around the world to get buzz going before the vehicles debuted. Here’s a blurb from Bring a Trailer:
These full-scale display models of BMW i3 and i8 vehicles are said to have been produced by BMW for promotional use in the company’s dealerships. The fiberglass bodies are finished in Ionic Silver Metallic with black and Frozen Blue accents, and they are mounted on metal frames with inboard swivel caster wheels. The i8 model has LED lighting, and both models feature black-finished simulated glass, side mirrors, a faux shark fin antenna, and alloy wheels. The models do not have an interior or running gear. These BMW display models were acquired by the seller in 2022 and are now offered at no reserve in California with a bill of sale.
OK, so here’s what I got so far on why we should buy the BMW i3 display car:
- This is a historical items for sale right as the BMW i3 is having its moment in the sun. I believe the i3 will become a collector’s item in the future, meaning this display car will make us rich! Maybe. Possibly. Probably not.
- We can sell the i8 display car to recoup whatever we spend on these display cars. Current bid is at $1000. That’s a bargain!
- The car is for sale in California — that’s local!
- The car has caster wheels for easy(ish) repositioning.
- The i3 display car is made of fiberglass, so it won’t rust and it’s lightweight and thus easy to move (ish)
- There are real, actual wheels and tires on the car. And given how much i3 tires cost, we could actually save money buying this
- There’s no battery or compressor (no “Black Death!“) or any powertrain at all that could fail. This will be my most reliable car ever, by far.
- It’s pretty much a hollow shell, so we could store things inside it
- The lighting on the i3 doesn’t work, but I think it can be made to work, which would be awesome
- This could be used as a decoy for when someone inevitably tries to steal my “Holy Grail” i3. I’m not entirely sure how that would work, but come on — this thing screams decoy.
[Editor’s Note: I wonder if David should mention that he has had many and currently has a few cars that are equally immobile and non-running as these two display models, and these have the advantage of not leaking fluids everywhere. Maybe that would just be opening a can of worms? – JT]
You know, those 10 make for a pretty dang convincing argument. And you know…I don’t even think this needs to take up a garage space. I think this should be the centerpiece of our living room; think of all the attention it would get from visitors. Fancy paintings, nice sculptures, beautifully-framed photographs, gorgeous art-deco furniture — none of that has anything on a full-size engineering masterpiece sitting in the middle of a living room. Heck, I wonder if I could reconfigure some of the metal structure underneath to create a small office in there…
Anyway, I think I’m pretty close. Between those 10 extremely compelling reasons for us to buy the i3 display car and whatever couple of reasons you can help me out with in the comments, I think I’ll be towing a fake i3 to our abode in no-time!
See, marriage — it’s not so hard!
All Images: Bring a Trailer
Elise,
Do you like fur? Chinchilla, seal, opossum. Whatever you want DT will buy it. Use mothballs.
Z
Unless you can convince Beau to make the purchase and store them off-site from your home don’t do it. It’s not worth the inevitable fights over something that serves no other purpose than taking up space and burning out her good will towards your other non running but repairable vehicles etc.
David. David. Just….David……*shakes head*…..David.
Yeah … He’s just … I mean … *Sigh*
Either David is still drunk from the reception or he is probing the limits of divorce. 🙂
My partner and I have our own money so I can spend whatever I think sensible (LOL) on cars.
A few random ideas for it.
Kids playhouseCamping shelterGiant a$$ RC carsShell for a driving simulatorMovie propsStatic art/wall display for someone’s mega garageInstagram “influencer” massive fake flex prop…
David, you should absolutely not be wasting your effort trying to convince Elise to allow you to buy it with your own money and keep it at home.
You should be trying to convince Beau to buy it with Galpin’s money and keep it at the dealership!
There are two words that pave the way to marital bliss: “Yes dear.” Will still be married 46 years at the end of December. That’s how I know the magic of these two words!
is this like trying to buy an old Old Navy pickup and display it? I tried to do that once.
Once.
This is hubris and will end in Greek tragedy.
Elise is right. Always. Sooner you understand that, easier will be your life. And you need that new appliance. You don’t know, but Elise does.
In your mind it’s already moved from the garage to the living room. I look forward to Jason’s article on your intervention. I know, you can stop any time you want to.
Check age code on tires, then admit you’re wrong.
Well, at least you’d have no problem making emissions…
Dear Elise (not your real name),
Be firm and advise David that this is not a prudent purchase as you begin your life together. You may want to suggest a much smaller pair of BMW models for David to tinker with such as this set of BMW LEGO’s:
https://www.lego.com/en-us/product/bmw-m4-gt3-bmw-m-hybrid-v8-race-cars-76922
In the meantime best wishes and good luck managing his impulses to collect non-functional automobiles.
Wait until he discover chinese Lego knock-offs from AliExpress.
No.
Chop the top, turn it into a king size bed and then you can have a racecar bed that you sleep in with your wife. Milhouse’s dad would eat his heart out to see someone have their cake and eat it too.
Was gonna say – if they’re planning on having kids – either one of these would make the most epic kid bed. But a king size bed conversion? Your idea is better. 4-poster beds are so 19th century.
In Future News, David Tracy gets to spend another week living in the Pontiac Aztek!
You know David I think you need to curtail your impulsive nature until your wife tells you her real name. This wasn’t a green car marriage (car was intended) was it?
You must buy this.
Make them both into enclosed trailers you tow behind your i3.
First: Congratulations, David! All the best wishes for you, guys!
Second: France.
Third: Ehh, I’d suggest not to overdo it. Elise (Not Her Real Name) is incredibly supportive, but it may be better to respect her (generous) limits.
Regarding your points:
6. is not completely unreasonable.
7. I cried a little.
The rest are, well, a bit inconclusive to me.
But what do I know, I’m not even married.
France? You called me?
David I like you and wish you nothing but the best in your marital endeavors. Here are some pointers.
1. Before marriage Elise and after marriage Elise are two totally different people. I doubt their DNA matches.
2. Now that you are married it isn’t reasons for it is bargaining for. I will get rid of all my crap cars by February 1st if I can buy it. Even if it means the crusher.
3. It is fiberglass so maybe the backyard or at the dealership where she isn’t enraged many times a day seeing it.
4. My suggestion is enter rehab, learn this is a bad idea and find ways to enjoy the honeymoon period than pissing off the wonderful gal you married.
I should know I have never been married so just like a childless couple knows how best to raise a kid the eternal bachelor knows how best to survive a marriage.
Mercedes will immediately appropriate it and turn it into a camper.
I wish I could like this twice.
Looking at the underside . . . there is some rust, so there is something resembling familiar territory . . .
As a male married person, I can personally guarantee that giving your wife an ultimatum will never cause any adverse relationship issues. She will eventually see the error of her ways.
Follow me for more (horrible and possibly life-threatening) marriage advice.
And you now begin your journey to understanding.
True from here on our it is a never ending wonderland of her teaching you that everything you know, did or thought is wrong and you should never make decision or have a separate thought without checking with her. Normally a bad situation but considering your life choices to date yeah ask her about everything ahead of time even about if you should poop. Really you made some hilariously bad life choices that we have all enjoyed. But now you have to consider someone else. So unless either one of you can say we have too much friggin money we need to make bad buying decisions or just burn a few thousand dollars don’t do it