Automakers have been finding really fascinating ways to see how they could change the experience of just driving a car. Some automakers are now crazy enough to lock extremely simple functions like changing the position of your HVAC vents behind a screen. Other automakers love the idea of locking car features behind paywalls. Thankfully, automakers are beginning to reverse course, but a reader has a terrible idea for the worst feature a car could have.
David recently drove a Porsche Macan EV, a six-figure car with a hilariously terrible sunvisor without a way to extend it. That’s silly, but what’s worse is this car buyer nightmare fuel from Rod Millington:
I have just the idea to sell it. Electric sunvisors where all functions are controlled through a submenu of a touchscreen.
You’re welcome.
Kelly had the same terrible and hilarious idea:
Maybe they can sell you a subscription to the extended visor option?
Of course, I have to give a nod to my favorite joke account, Jatco Xtronic CVT:
No, the missing feature was the only one that could truly boost its comfort, power delivery, and fuel economy: the Jatco Xtronic CVT.
I love that someone is reading all of our articles just to dump weird praise on that CVT.
Also impressive is what KYFire wrote on today’s Shitbox Showdown featuring cars starting with the letter ‘D’:
Delightful Daihatsu deserves daily driving. Dirty, dingy, dilapidated Daewoo doesn’t deserve daylight.
Finally, let’s roll on over to the report about scalpers charging money for otherwise free DMV appointments in Florida. What do you call a huge number of illegitimate appointments? A. Barth help me out here:
However, in recent years, the Florida DMV has encountered a serious quantity of illegitimate appointments
Bastards!
Also, I feel you, Lizardman in a human suit, scalpers ruin everything fun:
Damn scalpers. I suggest bringing back burning at the stake, just for them. I’m still pissed about not getting a mini super Nintendo because of them.
I’m still salty over not getting a Hot Wheels Not Wheels. Have a great evening, everyone!
(Topshot: Ford)
Remember kids, only the good internet sites have a comment section. And only the best sites feature daily COTD winners. And only one site has a Mercedes Streeter to recognize them.
Mercedes is a gem.
A 12 word alliteration, impressive.
Oh Jatco, your commitment to the bit is a treasure. And just like your namesake, we always feel it when you miss a shift.
Jatco never misses a shift, for his vigil is continuous and his ratios are infinite.
Great. The sentient transmission has started a cult.
Woohoo! First COTD since the heady days of Jalopnik, far too many years ago.
I always look forward to the Jatco comments. I get a little sad when there isn’t one on an article.
Whoever is running the account is getting good at timing and putting just enough jokes that they stay funny. They never feel forced
Oh man now I feel very privileged, I managed to snag both the Nintendo classic mini and a not wheels. Devoted far too much time and effort to both, but no regrets!
The SNES is so good and worth it. I managed to get one by leaving work in the middle of the day when it came out.
“I have just the idea to sell it. Electric sunvisors where all functions are controlled through a submenu of a touchscreen.”
… designed in such a way that the touchscreen is always unreadable due to glare.
and the servo used is so small, that it takes an awfully long time to adjust because of the gear ratios.
Just select sport mode from the menu
Thanks for the COTD! BTW, Jatco Xtronic CVT is no joke. I think it has reached sentience and may be trying to brainwash us. Which I hate, because I don’t like competing with machines. YA HEAR THAT, JATCO XTRONIC CVT? HUMANITY BELONGS TO THE LIZARD PEOPLE! HANDS OFF!
I love this place.
Congrats on the COTD!
Look, I know it’s been cold out, but can y’all ectotherms hurry your evil plots up already? You’re getting outcompeted in the US.
If you damn humans would stick to the damn plan, it would go faster. As it is, we had to do a quickie brainwash on Elon to try and kill ev’s, but the results were not very good. We wanted deranged, but he somehow went straight to fascist nutjob.
For your COTD I’m going to have to ask you to state your first name, your last name and occupation.
Name: (Indecipherable hisses, clicks, and gutteral sounds)
Occupation: Transportation Specialist for the Earth Occupation and Terraforming Unit, North America Division
Hmm…that’s not what we have on your court documents
Lmao!
This is exactly the response I came here for.
Please identify all the crosswalks in the pictures below….
Crosswalks are a human concept. Any rational species would separate walking paths from vehicle paths for safety.
Jatco’s legal would like to have a word with you:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zHU2RlSCdxU
NO! NOT THAT!