Here’s Everything Wrong With Our New Pontiac Aztek

I bought a Pontiac Aztek for $3600 to reward you, dear readers, for become Autopian Members. Thank you! Now, as part of that deal, I’m going to have to sleep in the Aztek for a week, but before that: Let’s have a look at everything wrong with this machine.

I already gave you a sneak peek “first look” at our new Pontiac Aztek, and it looks nice. Remarkably so for a 21 year old machine. But aesthetics are only a small slice of the automotive pie; how does the thing actually work? Well, upon arrival, the answer was: Not well.

The first thing I heard when the transporter drove the Aztek to my location was the car going into park and then VROOOOOMMMMMMMMM. The RPMS shot sky-high, and then — boom. It was off.

What the? Was that the Aztek? I wondered. Maybe it was a different car? Then I fired the thing up and, nope: It was the Aztek. SUNOVA!

This, to me, seemed like maybe an intake manifold leak — something for which these 3.4-liter V6s are notorious. But it got worse. Not only was the motor revving to the sky, but the AC didn’t work even though the Cars & Bids description said it was just serviced! Then, on top of that, when I shut the car off, the key would release, but only in the accessory position.

I woke up the next morning with a dead battery.

I was not thrilled. I was expecting an Aztek with an AC that blew cubes, with an ignition switch that performed its basic function without issue, and with an engine devoid of an intake manifold leak. Surely these issues should have been noted in the auction description, right?

I texted the seller, who has been nothing but great throughout the whole interaction, communicating well, getting the car shipped for me, sending the title quickly — he seemed like a solid guy. But what’s with the bad ignition switch, lack of AC, and high idle? Here’s what he responded to my inquiry:

So when u bought it the person before me told me about that ignition issue and when I had it I never had a problem but if u look under the steering column the hole closest to the ignition if you stick a pen in there you will feel a lever and once you push if and turn the key off a the same time it will come out I never had to do it but I felt it when he showed me, but the weird idle and non working ac had to be a result of low voltage, when I dropped off the car to get shipped it was about 112 here and the ac was blowing ice cold. I’m sorry your having a bad experience right off the bat if there is anything I can do to help I’ll do what I can

Hmm. So I stick a pen into a hole on the bottom of the steering column and it releases the key?

Sure enough!

Damn, but do I have to do this every time I want to turn the car off? Either way, my car was dead, so I had to put it on a charge. I hooked up my trickle charger and waited a few hours (you can see the extension cord on the left side of the image below):

Then I set off to take the Aztek on a drive, only to realize: The problems were fixed! All of them! The ignition switch was working properly, the AC was blowing ice cold, and the engine was no longer revving to the sky with my foot off the pedal. Hot damn!

There are still some little issues with the car, like this switch panel is coming off the driver’s door:

And this exterior door trim is missing (this is driving me crazy; I’m keeping an eye out for this piece at my local junkyard):

And more importantly, there’s this odd sound shortly after I start the car:

But overall, for a 21 year-old Pontiac Aztek, this thing is in remarkable shape, and I have to say I’m 100% thrilled with it. Even the tires are only about three years old:

Even the underbody rust, which looks a bit scary in the photos, isn’t that bad, per my handy-dandy flathead-poke rust perforation test:

What a great purchase! Sure, there was an initial scare caused by the wonky GM electrical system that goes haywire when the battery is a little low, but otherwise, I’ve got a solidly B+ Aztek, which is awesome for $3,604. Look at how much other Azteks from Cars & Bids went for:

Did we get a smokin’ hot deal?

I can’t wait to drive this thing a bit more and write an Unironic Pontiac Aztek review. Because let’s be real: Far too many people love the Aztek because it looks weird, but what’s it actually like as a car beyond that wackiness? More on that soon.