“Maaayyynne, that switch you told me to put in didn’t work and I’m over it. Let ‘em tow it and F-’em.” This was said in exasperation to me by one of my best friends (and neighbor) when he finally reached his boiling point in the parking lot of his former employer.
How did he get to this point? A few weeks earlier, after a management shake-up and multiple staff walk-outs, he had come to the realization that employment at another venture was probably his best move. A little bit of this, and he was scot-free from those assholes and ready for the next chapter in life. Out to the parking lot and into his trusty steed, which has served him faithfully for tens-of-thousands of miles (the exact quantity is unknown, as the odometer stopped years ago). “This is the last time these pricks will ever see these tail lights!” he murmured as he prepared for his triumphant final exit.
The key slotted into the ignition yet it failed to produce the telltale chime that accompanied the start of this “Portofino Blue” hoss ever since it rolled off the Louisville, KY Assembly Plant in ‘96. Emotions were running high in that moment, so it was barely noticed against all the other consistent details of his ‘97 Explorer. The near monotone grey-colored interior, the familiar smell, the feel of the vinyl, plastic and rubberized plastic. Those same Ford plastics that seemed to be in every product of that period–here’s looking at you big volume units like Ranger and Taurus.
“Grey is good!” -Ford Execs, 8yrs BRS (Before Rob Spiteri)
The key was turned as the “exit stage left!” was about to commence, Snagglepuss style. But nothing happened. The key just spun forward in its cylinder and there was no Germanic roar from the 4.0 “Cologne” V6 (that’s Cologne Germany, y’all) from under the non-Germanic hood. “Heavens to Murgatroyd!”
“‘Found On Road Dead’ for sure!” (F-O-R-D) my buddy said as he called his wife for a boost home. The fact that the most trusty of all cars he’s ever owned would pick such an inopportune moment to crap out was to be, charitably, unfortunate. I’ve lived next door from my Exploder-owning friend for 6.5 years now and the only thing he’s done to this truck in all those years was one $15 oil pressure sending unit, gas, oil, tires and a battery. Everything else just always worked. It was daily driven to and from work and taken on many trips to Myrtle Beach, SC and to the beautiful mountains of Western NC (6+ hrs away from The Cape Fear). The fact that this was the moment that it finally stopped working was even more excruciating given the long, failure-free record of service.
Now, I will say that over my span of 126 cars and trucks over the past 28 years, I’ve grown a slight bit judgmental, critical, old-man-ornery and just generally bitter towards certain cars. I’ve created my own stereotypes of certain brands solely based on my own conjecture and subjective, anecdotal experiences. I’ll totally own and admit it, too. Everyone walks their own path in this world and my path has been full of broken, problematic German cars and Fords. I’ll save you the details but you may hear about them soon (if I’m feeling saucy and ready to write about them after a few Stanley Tucci Negronis).
So I’ve already defined the setting and also admitted my own bias walking into this vexing situation. Now that all of that has been said and is out in the open, we shall continue along this tale of rebirth and Ford catharsis.
“Dude! So sorry to hear. It sounds like your ignition switch conked out. I’ll grab one from Pick n Pull for you this weekend when I go!” was the text I sent back, thinking I had this all figured out without even seeing it. Hubris to the max, I know. You could probably tell this wasn’t going to end so simplistically or easily.
Off to the local parts yard
A couple days later I found myself in the Ford row at the local yard. There were a handful of Exploders there, but they were definitely outnumbered by Edges, Escapes and everything else that Ford did since the Clinton Administration. These trucks were literally the #1 seller for my later teenage years and well into the Dubya Bush/Early Aughts era before the Firestone Tire Recall spelled out the beginning of the end for them. There was a ‘94, a ‘96, a ‘99, an ‘01…dammit, there was no ‘97! I think the ignition switch was similar to the Ranger, but then I realized that the late ’90s were right around the time that chip keys and RF security systems were being implemented furiously and literally changing every year. I’d better get one that’s as close to a ‘97 as possible, which meant grabbing the ignition switch out of that ‘96 Exploder.
A cheap, Amazon-sourced replacement ’97 Exploder ignition switch; made by communists
I will hand it Ford for ease of replacement of that switch: turn the key to the “On” position, press down on a spring-loaded button on the button with a pen (or such) and the cylinder pops right out! “I’m the man!” says I; awash in above-said hubris and totally setting myself up for an about-face failure on this task.
Push in this little pin and it pops right out. Easy; too easy.
The ignition switch just slots right into the steering column.
And here it is: Just so all of Autopia is aware and let it be forever placed in The Official Record that a ‘96 Exploder ignition switch will not work in a ‘97 Exploder. They’re frickin’ different. After sitting in my buddy’s ex-employer’s parking lot, fiddling with the wrong ignition switch on my lunch break from The Autopian on a hot spring afternoon (two weeks ago) in The Port City of Wilmington NC, I gave up. A text went out to my friend telling him to order the right part online and that we’ll toss it in as soon as it arrives.
Three days later, a cheap Chinese ignition switch came in for a ‘97 Exploder and… it also didn’t fit. Frickin’ communists, man.
At this point my friend was starting to get a little rattled after my second suggestion did not pan out and my car repair credentials were not exactly shining through. People usually give you a pass if you’re wrong about something once, but after the second time, it starts to look like you don’t know what you’re talking about. I needed a solution and redemption.
Things got even worse and slightly more stressful when my friend got a message from ex-employer instructing him to remove his vehicle from their property immediately with an imminent tow to a holding yard occurring if he failed to comply. He was pretty upset to get that call and he confided in me that he appreciated the effort I put in, but that he was resigning himself to just let the car go.
Hitting a wall
My buddy has a heart of gold, he’s an excellent cook and is one of the best friends I have in this world, so failure was not an option. Especially since I frickin’ run Gossin Motors Backyard Shitbox Auto Rescue and write about it here for David and Jason! Talk about my credentials taking a hit if I couldn’t get a flapjackin’ late 90 Exploder to start–they’re literally one of the most simple everyday vehicles on the road today! No cam phasers, no turbos, no hybrid electrical architectures, just a pushrod V6, a four-speed auto, a cassette player, a truck frame and some wheels. We got dis. We know dis. Go, team go. Channel DT, I says to myself–it always works in a pinch. “What Would David Do?”
Thinking of my benevolent, badass, bespectacled boss brought me all of the motivation I needed in my moment of despair. The imagery in my mind of him wheeling along in a vehicle far worse than the one at hand, covered in grease, snow and mud in sub-freezing temps, whilst fighting ridiculous self-imposed deadlines made this task seem like a cakewalk in comparison. Thanks DT, I needed that.
To The Master of Locks
I then decided to call my buddy Eric, who is a local locksmith, for advice since he deals with these types of things daily. The dude is a genius. He has told me stories of security systems and general locksmithery that would blow your mind. Example: he made a “Tibbe” (skeleton key) replacement for my XK8 Jag for me.
The master key unlocks all the lock cylinders on the car, but the valet key has to only unlock the drivers door and ignition cylinder, with the same cylinders and tumblers used for both key applications. More there for the upcoming XK8 saga story if I can the idea past DT (He has a near-zero interest in that car as the dude likes Jeeps and electric BMWs, but I’ve been slowly working on him for the past 15 months to get that story green-lit).
A badass Jag needs a badass key.
Eric told me that I was probably barking up the wrong tree and that those steering columns were notorious for internal breakage due to cheap pot metal used in the inner gearing. A little bit of internet research to verify and it turns out that his hunch and years of past experience was correct.
What’s that thing they say about believing in and reinforcing your own anti-Ford stereotypes?! “Goos-fabba, Stephen, don’t get all worked up”, says my Inner Self. “You know that Volkswagens are way worse to wrench upon, so at least this isn’t that bad!” Inner Self was right, we have work to do here.
It’s Bo Time (similar to Go Time, but the truck was parked near a Bojangles)
Running back to the parking lot where the forlorn Ford was sitting after work that night, I saw firsthand that Eric was spot on. The inner gearing has literally walked off the job site (although after a commendable 26-year performance on the clock) and the truck was now a screwdriver-start. This actually would’ve been a perfectly fine working solution for my friend except… there was no way to “screwdriver-stop” the engine once started.
We ended up getting the truck off the ex-employers lot with the screwdriver-start and pulled the fuel pump relay and battery cable once it was back in our hood, safely and successfully recovered.
Starting the truck with a hand tool and pulling relays and cables every time you need to turn off your car isn’t a viable option, so there was still work ahead to be done.
I began calling local junkyards for a ‘97 steering column (I was definitely not taking a chance on a <‘96 or a >’98 from Pick n Pull after seeing the model year differences) and found exactly one (1!) in the entire Wilmington Metro area. Wilmington has almost 150K people so let that be a lesson in parts availability of the day. If a ’90s Explorer is hard to find parts for, good luck with your Maserati BiTurbo.
Even better, my friend’s birthday was this past week, so getting him a shiny used steering column would be the perfect gift. I even put a bow on it and included a little signed card. It’s the little things, ya’ll. My buddy loved that I put the time and effort into finding the correct replacement part and taking a long lunch (after DT’s approval) to run to the exurbs to grab it late last week.
Let’s Wrench
The old column came out with surprising ease and was actually a much easier job than I was expecting (again, past Ford trauma). There are four studs that the column assembly sits upon with four nuts to secure it in place. After that there are seven electrical plugs for the wipers, horn, airbag etc., the trans linkage, and the collar that attaches the steering shaft to the intermediate shaft and steering gear. That’s it!
Remove this plastic trim cover…
Unscrew the tilt lever head and remove the lower column trim…
Remove this metal bracket…
…and remove this pinch bolt from the shaft collar: done!
I literally had the new column installed in about 30 min. Big air high-5 to Henry F. somewhere in the afterlife. Actually I heard he was a jerk, so taking it back and sending that high-5 to Edsel instead.
A sweet shot of those electrical connectors referenced above.
The 4 stud/nut attaching points.
The pinch bolt cutout that holds the shaft in place within the collar.
My friend was over the moon. Here he was thinking that his steady-eddie, ride-or-die hoss of an Exploder was about to be henceforth referred to in the past tense just last week! Now here it was, on his birthday, ready for more uncountable miles (remember the odometer doesn’t work). The best part was seeing the joy and happiness in helping someone you care about. It was also great in a very Autopian sense of learning something new, expanding one’s skill and knowledge set and combating past biases.
Are the Fords that wronged me in the past forgiven? No, they’re not. There is still a burning desire for drinking and revenge (Alvis-style) whenever they are spoken of.
But this does place things in a new light and has henceforth provided me a new perspective. Maybe I should try and channel the positive, thoughtful approach of our own Mark Tucker, who can always see the bright side of any car. Maybe things aren’t always the way that they seem. Maybe life is too short to carry around anger and bitterness towards anyone or anything. Perhaps I will be more open to the next backyard rescue of a frickin’ Ford and not be so flippant and fervent in my judgment.
I mean, nothing is as bad as wrenching on modern Volkswagen products.
All photos courtesy of Stephen Walter Gossin
Another vote for the JAAAAG story here!
“What’s with that green car that’s been sitting in your driveway for the past couple years? Is it registered?” -My HOA
“It’s a 21yr old, $200 Jag. Sure.” -Me, possibly less-than truthfully
““Maaayyynne, that switch you told me to put in didn’t work and I’m over it. Let ‘em tow it and F-’em.” This was said in exasperation to me by one of my best friends (and neighbor) when he finally reached his boiling point in the parking lot of his former employer”
At that point I was expecting the Explorer to have its ignition cylinder ripped out again, called in as stolen then set on fire, full of old tires and diesel fuel.
My experience with Fords leads me to believe that this is going to be just the first in a long series of increasingly catastrophic failures.
I’m still mad at Ford for how they treated Robert Kearns. Dirty.
Ugh, pot metal. That’s the reason why you see so many Dubya-era Escapes with the rear glass held by duct tape. Those damn hinges rot before your very eyes. Replacing them isn’t a big task, but they are absurdly expensive. I think the OEMs ran for $120 a pop when I looked to replace them on my Escape (hence why your average owner of an aging cheap box on wheels went with the $5 duct tape fix). Thankfully, our communist friends were selling knockoffs for half that price. Since the OEM hinges sucked I didn’t see any harm in using the Chinese knockoffs instead.
Pulling the alternator out of a V6, Gen 1 Escape will make you question if the engineers had a “meth break” in addition to lunch breaks and coffee breaks included in their daily schedules.
Thanks for reading and for the comment!
The gen 1/2 Escape had some servicing quirks, like an oil drain plug and filter housing so far apart that you would need 2 pans to let them drain at the same time. I used to drain them one at a time while moving the pan back and forth. The quirks supposedly came from it being a Mazda-derived platform with a mishmash of Mazda and Ford mechanical components, but I don’t really believe that.
Suffering + Nobility = LITERATURE
The suffering is pretty constant here, as broken cars abound. It keeps the subject material fresh though and keeps me employed by DT.
I’ll call that a win.
Thanks for reading and for the comment!
I enjoy BRS as a metric for how old something is.
Also, you could do far, far worse then being forced to wrench near a Bojangles. At least you’ll have Bo-berry Biscuits for fuel.
Seriously, Bojangles is awesome and is probably my favorite thing about NC.
The referenced Bojangles is about .5mi from my neighborhood.
It’s a blessing and a curse.
Thanks for the BRS and Bo-berry up-votes, and for reading!
There will be no afterlife high-fives for henry ford, as he was as thoroughly hatefilled as perhaps possible, and inspiring the holocaust cancels out inventing mass-production and the five-day workweek by a long shot
He didn’t invent mass production, interchangeable parts were around over a century before Mr Ford.
He did pioneer the moving assembly line
The only reason to raise your right hand toward Henry Ford would be to distract him from the left uppercut heading right for his nuts.
Pretty sure he didn’t inspire the Holocaust, and yes I am aware of his involvements with the Nazis.
That jag key seems exactly the same as my 2004 Ford Falcon… careful on the Ford dissing
“Perhaps I will be more open to the next backyard rescue of a frickin’ Ford and not be so flippant and fervent in my judgment.”
I guess I’ve been lucky with Fords. The 85 Ranger did kill its engine but a wrecked Fox body Capri provided a replacement engine with nothing more than a pilot bearing (donor was automatic), a fuel pump swap and capping a vacuum line. The 93 Ranger went 9 years with no issues and the 95 Escort gave us 15 years without a lot of aggro. The 2002 F150 was a bit of a challenge because I replaced the heads but after 3 years it’s still very reliable
I mean, I like everything with wheels, including Fords and VWs.
It just that some engineering choices really can burn you when you’re wrenching on a budget, in the dark, on your back, in your driveway and end up leaving you a little bitter.
I’m going to do a story on a Ranger I rescued last year, soon. Those trucks are quite hardy.
Been a min since there was a Capri sighting around these parts.
Hey, thanks for reading and for the comment!
Rangers feel so ridiculously cheap, especially compared to Japanese trucks of the same era. The upside is everything is $30. Starter? $30. Mirror? $30. Shocks? $30.
Weird things happen though – I feel like the Ranger was a box shaped bucket for any excess engine inventory they had so there’s multiple V6’s (3.0, 4.0, variations of each of those with various power outputs), multiple 4 cylinders (the old cast iron one, the Mazda one) , all being used concurrently.
I love reading about rescuing vehicles.
I currently own 2 Rangers ( 2021 and 2001 ).
Big difference between them. I did a clutch job on the 2001 ranger a bit ago.
It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.
On vehicles and loving/hating them, I totally get it.
I have my own list.
But, really, mostly it seems to be that every manufacturer has their ups and downs.
Toyota, everyone seems to love. But the Camry I worked on in the not too distant past left me wondering…. Putting the oil filter on top of the rearward slanted 4 cylinder engine guarantees oil running down the engine. I put a rag below, of course. Contrast to the Subaru, where the top mounted oil filter has a recess around it to make reasonably sure there isn’t a mess. But try to change spark plugs on the Subaru…..
My point is that every manufacturer has cars that are better and worse. And they all make mistakes. I started out a Ford bigot, but have mellowed out considerably.
I have owned many Fords, several Nissans, Chevy’s and BMW’s. And a Toyota and a Hyundai ( but neither was in a pear tree ). Stay away from the budget offerings from any manufacturer and you will be happier is what I have learned over the years.
My jaw hurts. I think I got lockjaw just from the picture of that Buick. Gonna have to get a tetanus shot. Curse you, SWG!!!
I have been hunched over that thing in my driveway for weeks now with a wiring diagram in one hand and a multi-meter in the other and I’m just about ready to light it on fire.
Probably one of the most difficult I’ve ever attempted and definitely on a car that has the least value. Pretty much the opposite scenario of what is termed “ideal”.
I have to beat Matt’s BMW though, so we will solder (sic) on.
Hey, thanks for reading and for the comment!
Gutting and cleaning that thing would have been step 1 for me.
“Always get it running first.” -David Tracy
When you consider that your friend was going to let his car go for what turned out to be a $100 and one hour fix, it’s dawns on you that this probably happens pretty often. There’s probably lots of stuff out there one $50 02 sensor shy of being on the road.
The guys at the local Pick n Pull have told me of countless cars that are literally driven there to be crushed. Such an incredible waste of materials, value and money.
But hey, fixing every one that we can and keeping them rolling is the best we can do. And that’s exactly what we’re doing.
Thanks for reading and for the comment!
Vote here for more moldy Jag content!
(Oh, that car is a bad idea all around, but I think many of us look forward to reading about it anyway.)
Count me in as well – a cheap XK8 is on my next bad idea list.
Strangely enough, the XK8 isn’t moldy! Literally everything else on that car is broken, yet the top is still watertight.
“Buy an XK8! In 20 years, everything on the car will break, but the top will still be ok!” -Jag advertisement, ’02
Thanks for the vote, for reading and for the comment!
Why didn’t you just change the ignition rack, not that bad of a fix and parts only a few bucks?
You mean rebuilding the bad column internal gearing?I spoke with a 30+yr mech buddy of mine who said it was a waste of time and that if I valued my time, I should instead get a cheap used column assembly.
I found an entire replacement steering column for $100 and had it installed in under an hour.
Bingo-bango.
Thanks for reading and for the post!
I’m also a 30-yr+ mechanic and it’s dead-easy to fix the gear/rack assembly in Ford columns, even simpler than replacing the whole column, you just have to be able to pull the steering wheel. They can be VERY tight, so a puller is a necessity, but that’s about the only sticking point.
I searched both YouTube and Google for “gear/rack assembly in Ford columns” and didn’t find anything on either of the first pages of returned results.
If it’s super easy to do, it is also under the internet radar for a DIY repair procedure. I’d be interested to learn though and thanks for the above info!
I just got a 2009 Ford Ranger Sport Supercab 2WD with the 4.0 V6 and manual transmission, that interior looks pretty much the same as the Explorer. The engine/transmission combo is perfect, mine is base as hell, not even carpeted floor. Its my dream truck combo that I was looking for a long time, size and options wise. The only thing I will miss is having AC (I think its a canadian truck, the owners manual is on french lol)
“Blame Canada!” –Sheila Broflovski
Blame Canada? Well….where’s there’s smoke…
Heartwarming story: you won-and got to help out someone you care about. Gold Star for you, SWG. And, once you’ve done a good deed, you can be mean to everyone the rest of the month!
I do miss the warmth that comes from helping single moms and other broke-folk, but eventually I got tired of people abusing my affinity for fixing things cheap. Funny how the “just patch it up so I can get to work” crowd often seems to also be the “It was fine until you xxxx” crowd….
edit: I, too, want to read the Jaguar story!
I did the brakes on a co-worker’s Benz years ago (not a colleague here at The Autopian) and heard “It was fine until you touched it!” with every non-brake-related repair that thing needed (from that point forward), until they left the company.
That was a good lesson in learning that no good deed goes unpunished. Also of the liability involved with helping others with their second-most-valuable possession after a house.
Exactly why I politely decline to help anyone with a problem that they don’t fully understand, from air conditioning to computers.
I don’t give a grey plastic shit about Ford Exploders but your story and pop-culture reference links were very entertaining. And I vote for the XK8 writeup. I can use it to scare my friend with a Ford-era Jag.
Thanks, for the kind words and for reading! Hopefully our electric BMW & Jeep-obsessed boss will catch a little Jag Fever soon.
Ford-era Jags benefited hugely from Ford’s involvement and money. Other than flaky timing chain guides and somewhat fragile 5-speed ZF transmissions, those early XK8s were good cars. The ’03-up models with the 4.2/six-speed (S-Types, too) are even better.
I’m not brave enough to attempt to tackle a pre-Ford Jag from all I’ve heard of them.
There’s a beautiful early 90s XJ coupe that’s been sitting for years in a yard near my house. I’ve been too hesitant to approach the owner about it for fear of what repairs lie hidden beneath that beautiful shell.
Spot-on call on the timing guides and ZF trans.
Thanks for reading and for the comment!
Our Ford’s have been trash here in canada (YMMV) so I was blown away when my dad decided to get a Ford era Jag (08 xtype). It’s been…fine… but the parts that fail at 180xxx klms on the Jag don’t need replacing until 250xxx on our Toyota’s. I can see and feel the Ford build quality on this one.
I wrote this as I sit at the mechanic.
We did a piece on the X-Type last year. I strangely, really like those. Agreed on the above failure mileage points, especially for the cat converters (known issue).
Thanks for reading and for the comment!
https://www.theautopian.com/why-the-dirt-cheap-broken-jaguar-x-type-for-sale-in-every-town-might-actually-be-worth-buying-and-fixing/
As a Ford man myself, I’d offer the Ford stereotype may reside in the paradox of Ford’s preference for keeping models around for a long time in order to continually improve them overall (yay) BUT as part of that, constantly tweaking their individual systems so it can be hard to know which parts remain the same/are new (boo).
I esp. enjoyed the different angle/car porn shots of the column once removed, like you’re working in the middle of an Oregon Trail-esq circle of old cars. You have died of mold.
I started taking reference photos of the column replacement in my kitchen, then realize that I could utilize a much better background for each shot.
Huge points for tying the Oregon Trail reference into my months-long quest to beat both mold and Matt Hardigree’s BMW with that Swamp Buick!
Thanks, as always, Jack!
reminds me of a 91 Square body LTD I got for a song but ended up dumping at an auction. for some reason the exact same trans for the pretty much exact same car from 1980 something on is not compatible with one or to years from each other. literally all the 700R4’s in the chevies interchanged with ease, but not the AOD so much.
I has an AOD on an ’84 Fox-bodied Mercury Cougar that had the notorious nylon bushing around the “kickdown” rod/linkage (used to drop a gear for passing; mechanical, not digital).
As soon as that plastic/nylon bushing deteriorated, the rod halfway engaged the ‘kickdown” and the gearbox would ride the clutches and burn up.
So dumb.
Passenger Floor of the Exploder: 100% ocean bound Windex bottle.
I have never every seen that label before
Too True to be funny
That bottle is going straight to recycling when it’s empty. Environmentalism is big over here (see bio).
One of the driving motivations in rescuing all these older cars is to keep 2 tons of materials from end-of-life processes. Especially plastics.
Thanks for reading!
As the former owner of multiple Exploders, including a ’95 that had uncountable minor issues but simply could never die, I appreciate the effort put forth here.
I had a friend who had the same issue with the ignition, only you could start it without the key even in the ignition. We turned it off by hitting the fuel pump momentum switch in the passenger foot well, which also made it theft-resistant. Need to go somewhere, reset the switch and head out!
Excellent idea/call-out on the momentum switch! The screwdriver-start probably would’ve been a more viable option had I thought about/considered that.
Great User Name and thanks for reading!
SWG comes through again! The further I get from wrenching on my old shitboxes, the more I appreciate the time and effort it took, and the time and effort you take. Then, you take the time and effort to write about it for us!
Bosses, keep this guy around! Stephen, your writing keeps getting better and I’m enjoying following you on this new life path of yours! Thank you! (That’s a lot of exclamation points, I know, but SWG deserves it!)
Very kind of you to say and much appreciated- thank you!
Great story! And nice pic with the car and the old steering column, you incredibly photogenic bastard!
I was rocking the “work from home” sweats on my lunch break when I realized this piece needed some visuals. Ran out into the front yard with a steering column in one hand and a cell phone in the other looking like an utter lunatic to the neighbors.
Thanks for reading and for the kind words!
My wife had a ’96 Explorer for eight years. It rattled my “positive thoughtful approach” more than once. Take my advice: Never, ever, under any circumstances attempt to replace the fuel pump. Or the lower ball joints.
And btw, hers could be started without the key after about 170,000 miles. You could just turn the cylinder and it would start.
You couldn’t pay me enough to try and press out those lower ball joints.
I was interested enough to Google the fuel pump job and agreed; that looks like a flaming bitch of a job to do on your back.
I’d be willing to bet you were still positive and thoughtful throughout both jobs regardless.
I feel like the “How to start a ’97 Exploder a screwdriver” video get more trouble than views
I figure at least it’s an Explorer from the ’90s, rather than a Hyundai from 2023…so the potential targets for ne’er do wells (ne’ers do well?) are a lot fewer.
Solid point. It’s remarkable how quickly trucks of this era went from near ubiquitous to “few and far between” over the past ~3 years.
At least around these parts.
Not included in that video: how to screwdriver-stop the truck.
Thieves will be stuck searching for the fuel pump shutoff or relay with a running, stolen, ~$2500 truck with its hood popped.
Volcanic Wrenching Lairs ™ have neighbors?
Everyone has to live next to “that guy.”
“Honey wake up…it’s 3am and there’s a commando team in Chrysler uniforms in the front yard looking very confused by our new Lexus!!” “Yeah, tell them wrong house, they want next door…”
“Pentastar Team Six, it’s Bo Time: Swarm!”
Oh, come on now.
“Let me water your plants. Just let me water your plants!” -The Herlihy Boy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXyW5w5RRFY
They’re actually pretty laid back and probably the most chill neighbors in the history of neighbors – on par with DT’s old landlord. Although my place is nothing like his old spot (a mud pit in the back yard filled with non-running old Jeeps)
There’s a symbiotic relationship where they put up with my fleet being parked there and I help the neighborhood out with any repairs needed. A pretty smooth deal both ways.
Hey, thanks for reading and for the comment!