Unlike regular people, I rarely buy groceries for a week, much to the dismay of my wife. No, I’m more of a “go to Kroger every day to get two things” kind of guy, and not just because I enjoy the car spotting or that I’m hoping to catch a fresh Hot Wheels restock. Most recently, I was popping in daily to see if Good & Plenty was back in the candy aisle. It was out for like a week.
The thing about Good & Plenty is … no, wait, I’m getting off track. As a frequent flyer at Kroger (and Walmart and Home Depot, typically), I get to enjoy a wide variety of parking spaces and observe the parking skills of others.
Like you, I try to be a respectful parker. I take care not to overlap into the spot across from me, I make sure there’s sufficient door-opening space for whoever will climb into the car to my right, and if only because not doing so would bug me, I do my very best to make sure my car is perfectly parallel with the lines. Surely something bad will happen if I’m not parallel. And of course, I don’t park in handicapped spaces or pregnant-lady spaces and the like, as long as they seem reasonable. If I’m in a super hurry, I may take the Employee Of The Month’s space, because I think someone of EOTM temperament would surely be looking out for me, the customer.
Some people, however, just can’t seem to park well. Maybe they lack the skill, or they don’t care that much, or maybe they were just trying to get out of their car, into the store, and safely to the restroom as quickly as possible – in which case, Godspeed. No matter the reason, crummy parking doesn’t bother me much. My maximum response is an eye-roll, perhaps? A bemused head-shake?
Some people, on the other hand, go crazy. Over the line a little? Rear end sticking out a bit too much? Up goes a photo and accompanying screed on Facebook. Maybe an outraged TikTok or Reel is uploaded right there from the cart corral. There’s one guy Instagram’s algorithm keeps foisting on me who keeps an array of dickish stickers in his car so he can shame poor parkers, roasting them contemptuously as the deleterious decal is applied. Gee whiz, lighten up.
… Or don’t? Should I be getting angrier? I certainly don’t love it when someone else’s bad parking makes it all but impossible for me to get into my car. And when some knob parks his car diagonally across two spots to “protect” it (and in an active part of the lot, not the outskirts, mind you), for sure: screw that guy. But the rest? Life is short, and I don’t know their story.
You tell us: How Worked Up Do You Get Over People Parking Poorly?
Top graphic: depositphotos.com
Parking shows how civilized a person is.
If they park crooked/messed up but correct themselves, they are a civilized member of society.
If they parked crooked/messed up and don’t correct themselves, they are not a civilized member of society and clearly don’t abide by all societal norms. Same thing with returning shopping carts.
I’m usually not too pissed since I try and park in the no man’s land/drifting section of parking lots, but gargantuan pavement princess trucks parking all jagged pisses me off (especially in tight parking lots or parallel.)
Do you mean the gargantuan pavement princesses that are roughly the size of a Kenworth and feature 4WD, 12-inch body lifts, and huge off-road tires that are spotless because they have never left the street?
I have much more respect for the owner of a big, tricked-out 4WD truck if it’s filthy.
Depends. If there are other spaces available, I’ll just use one of those. If further than it would be with a good parking job, I need the exercise anyway. If there are no other spots, then yeah, I’m a bit peeved. My personal issue is with people parking at the yellow curb of a shopping center and running in to a store for 10 to 15 minutes. Especially when there are spots 20 feet away. Two way traffic is hindered at that point. That can make my blood boil if I let it.
Depends on the vehicle. Poorly parked Smart? Eh, whatever. Poorly parked F350? If you can’t park it, don’t buy it, bucko! This is very much a case of throwing stones when I live in a glass house though. As the owner of mostly tiny cars, I’m a bit notorious for just dumping my car wherever. My finest moment was once taking a triangular not-a-spot at the end of a row at the mall during Christmas season in one of my Fiat 500s. If I fits, I sits!
I don’t let it get to me, I try to avoid stores during peak times anyhow so I’m usually not fighting for a space. I usually look for a space out in the lot uphill and upwind from any cart returns, I don’t mind walking a bit.
What confuses me lately is I see more people pull through a space and park nose out leaving an empty space behind them. That space then gets filled and when they return with the cart full of 2×4’s to load in their truck they are crawling over someone’s hood to load it pissed off like that person was the problem.
Then they drive off without putting the cart in the corral and I think about how humanity is doomed.
People who park in a way that block otherwise usable spaces certainly annoy me, but occasionally end up saving me a spot that no one else will take in an otherwise full parking lot, since I’m not afraid to park a few inches away. I remember one time in college slotting into the middle of a spot with the vehicle on each side well over the line, and climbing out the rear hatch since both normal doors were unusable.
Since I’ve started buying nicer vehicles, I can’t do that anymore.
I certainly hope you managed to block both driver’s doors when you did that.
Depends. It’s just expected behavior at this point. Humans aren’t advanced enough to reliably park a car. If I’m in a shitbox/rental I’ll park normally even if that means they have no space to use their door. If I’m in my car I’ll just find another spot. I do get a little upset if someone has parked weird after I’ve already parked and usually check for dings and scratches but after that it’s left my mind and I’m on my way.
” And when some knob parks his car diagonally across two spots to “protect” it”
If it’s in the outskirts and it’s a nice/rare/interesting/valuable/classic car, I have no problem with this.
But if someone just has an average CUV and they’re taking up two spots because they couldn’t be bothered to park properly, there have been times when I’ve owned cheap beaters that I would squeeze my cheap beater into the spot they’re partially using.
And bonus points for parking my car so close to the driver door so they have to go in through the passenger side.
Normally that’s the worst I’ll do.
NORMALLY.
I live in the city near a college campus.
And one morning, a dipshit student parked his car and completely blocked my driveway… and thus I couldn’t get to work.
In THAT CASE, when nobody was looking, I kicked one of the dipshits doors to leave a small dent.
Then I called the Toronto parking authority and had the car towed.
And shortly after that as I was backing out to go to work very late (thankfully I have an understanding boss), I saw a young guy who looked like a dipshit who appeared to be looking for a car he couldn’t find… and had a look that was like “I could have sworn I parked my car here”
I thought about stopping and telling him that his car had been towed, but then I thought ‘Naaah… fuck him for blocking my driveway’
LOL
Unrelated sidenote: In the past at my work, there was a guy at my work who drove a Porsche Cayenne. He would park at the back of the parking lot to ‘protect it’
The guy was also a dick and a terrible manager. So just to fuck with him, I’d park my old beater next to him. Not close or anything. Just in a perfectly normal fashion in between the lines in the spot next to his ‘baby’. It made him go mental, but he couldn’t complain as I wasn’t doing anything that was technically wrong.
Before I moved to the boondocks, if someone blocked my driveway, I would have been tempted to figure out how to winch/drag/push them out of the way, and leave the car in the middle of the road…
I considered doing something like that as I was pissed. But I figured getting it towed and the owner having to pay the ticket/tow lot fees would be punishment enough.
I used to live in the D.C. metro area and parking in our neighborhood was zoned for residents only. If your car wasn’t registered to the zone and you didn’t have a visitor’s pass displayed, you could be ticketed and then towed. I lived there for two years and everyone on the block (30 townhomes) called in a tow truck for violators at least once.
Last week I saw one parking spot and pulled into it, yeah it was pretty tight. The woman in the car beside me had parked in what was 1.5 spots and way over, she then told me to move my car, I suggested that she back up and move over a bit so we both had room. Well she thought I was giving her sass, I was having a crappy day and suggested she stuff something somewhere sideways repeatedly and left. Didn’t make my day any better, all our spots are snow covered so you cannot see the lines right now which makes it worse, infinately worse.
Personally I’m delighted when someone else parks poorly in order to protect my car from door dings. So thoughtful!
https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/51539214093_a7df39f6f3_c.jpg
I have no problem with the park job of the Mercedes here. It’s not within the lines but it bothers nobody and it protects their car. Pulling this move is fine.
Enough to engage people in conversation in order to give them the opportunity to correct their malparkage. The conversations don’t usually go well, but I’ll keep trying
I don’t get worked up over it…..my wife makes me re-park if I don’t get the car centered in the parking space tho…..it has to be pretty far off before she says anything tho
My wife gets so pissed when I point out that she’s parked crooked.
Wait till you try to park in a f150 in a space that is barely wider than you. Then you park at an angle so you can open the door.
I drove a Silverado for some time, and my solution in areas with tight parking was to park a lot further out. If I need extra space because I’m driving a large vehicle, I’m absolutely going to try not to inconvenience anyone else.
Thank you.
Wish I could have done that but a tiny strip mall had a bank and was my only option. Big stores were easy just park a bit farther away instead of the single tiny space left.
Mind I grew up where a f250 standard cab fit fine in a compact spot. Not a city that hated cars.
I wish everyone thought like you.
This is the way. Don’t park your full size up front.
This is higly time of year dependant.
During the 4-6 months of all roads and parking lots being covered in snow and ice ‘winter parking rules’ are in effect, which means everything is a lawless hellscape of automotive fuckery you can’t be taking it personally.
The rest of the year when its a Caddillac or Denali pulling a smokes park in, lets say our commecial loading zone while I’m operating a forklift outside, I have an irrational desire to yell “Does this look like parking for rich assholes?!?” but I have been informed it is bad form for business ownership to yell at people in the street for parking like shit heads
I used to let it bother me until I watched my mother park her Volvo a couple of years back. There is no combination of seat/pedal/steering position that allows her to see completely over her hood or behind the car because of its high belt line, low greenhouse and her ever shrinking stature. To her credit, she takes it slow in lots, generally finds the most open places she can to park, and has not had any accidents. Or she gets me to drive her whenever possible. But now, every time I see a car parked cockeyed in a parking space, I picture my mom getting out of it and the slow burn fizzles away. And God help the asshole I catch defacing her car with a snide sticker.
I get the sticker guy too, and it makes me laugh, though I couldn’t see handing out that justice myself.
The only time I get really annoyed at bad parking is when parking is severely limited and their bad parking is preventing me from taking an otherwise good space- looking at you dude with an F350 and really wide tires at the Texans game last week. I hope you paid for 2 spaces.
You were very kind to not pour a quart of milk into his air vents. Some people might do that, or maybe empty the water from a can of tuna into those intake vents.
Everyone please note, do NOT do such things to the vehicle driven by an inconsiderate parker.
Taking notes…
P.S. I work in a kitchen and regularly have access to expired products that could easily turn quite putrid if left out in the hot, hot sun for a few hours.
I’d never dream of dumping such vile nastiness on, or in, some inconsiderate moron’s mis-moored 20-foot-long land yacht.
There are levels. As long as other spaces are available, a bad parker may simply get a mental “idiot” thrown their way before I move on with life.
Egregiously bad parking, especially in a busy lot, yeah I’m going to let that linger.
When I am in Florida and I have to take my mom to walmart I will wait in the parking lot just to watch the old people back into each others’ cars backing out of parking spaces. Every walmart visit at least once.
I have been working in k-12 education for 25+ years. Teachers and other educational professionals royally SUCK at parking. I would watch over the parking lot in the district office building and watch and laugh at people trying to park or I would walk into the building across the lot and see 4 out of 40 cars in a row that actually were between the lines correctly. Bad parking enrages me. I also back into parking spots and do not understand why that enrages others.
Living in Idaho, if I got really irritated every time someone was parked poorly, I’d be mad all the time. We have people constantly going the wrong way so they can back into nose-in angled spots, and just a couple days ago someone managed to get their pickup wedged in super close to me, and I am not sure how they got around the bollard and utility pole beside me.
That said, I make sure to be within the lines and not be part of the problem, since I hate navigating the chaotic full parking lots around here.
If they’re in any form of brodozer I get irrationally pissed
Usually it’s just a look of disgust, I definitely am bothered more when it impacts my ability to get back in my car.
I’m an adult, not going to let it ruin my day or vandalize the car no matter if the owner does deserve it.
Meh. Lazy people gonna lazy. I’ve got better things to get mad about.
I carry ultra sticky stickers that say “Please learn to park properly”
I’ve always believed that if you can’t precisely control a car at 3 MPH, how can you precisely control a car at 80 MPH?
I get fairly worked up. It’s not rocket science. It’s laziness and selfishness.