I love camper vans. Little mobile houses on wheels you can just take exploring, making your home wherever you park? What’s not to like? I mean, other than how you feel after a week or so of living in a van and are craving a shower and just one comfortable shit, for once. There’s a company, Tiffin, and they make a van called the GH1, and I was sent these press images of the van from a reader named J, just J. There’s some weird stuff in these pictures, though, and I just want to talk them out with you, if that’s ok.
The Tiffin GH1 is a Mercedes-Benz Sprinter 2500-based camper van that seems to retail for somewhere between $175-$200,000. It’s an all-wheel drive, off-road machine with an inline-four turbodiesel making 208 horsepower and 332 pound-feet of torque. It also has a 540 amp battery pack and a 220-watt solar panel system, and overall seems like a pretty nice off-road camping setup or “overlanding” or whatever you want to call it.
But that’s not what I want to talk about now; I want to talk about these press photos, because I have some questions. First, let’s look at one of the main press photos:
Okay, so we’re out in a forest and our #vanlife couple, Dustin and Claire, are out there relaxing on their chairs, pounding kombuchas or whatever and enjoying their time in what looks like a vast, old-growth forest.
It looks a bit chilly, or at least brisk out there under the tree canopy, too. Seems idyllic! But I have to wonder: what the hell are the surfboards for?
Or paddleboards, or whatever they are – I’m not a surfer, but even with my limited understanding of the sport, I’m pretty sure you’d want a body of, you know, water, to do all the paddling or surfing in, right?
Is there a way to glide a paddleboard over a lot of pine needles and leaf litter? And have fun?
Here our couple is absent, but they’re drying some clothes; maybe there’s water around here somewhere? An unseen lake? A big puddle? Maybe the local Sasquatch population saved up enough for an above-ground pool?
Oh, also, there’s this; look at the window on the sliding door:
Let’s zoom in. Computer! Zoom, and enhance!
That looks like the reflection of a sort of possibly friendly bear? Maybe a polar bear? I don’t think it’s inside the van because the door is slid into the open position. It seems to be more of a reflection. Did a bear take the photo, maybe? I don’t mean to discriminate, but generally, bears aren’t great photographers.
Am I missing out on something here? Is there a big woodland-surfing or forest-paddleboarding movement I’ve been foolishly unaware of? The cynical part of me is tempted to think they just wanted to throw in every #vanlife cliché into these pictures, and surf (or paddle) boards are absolutely a part of that, so someone propped them against a tree and they looked good and everyone moved on and never thought, hey, why the fuck would you bring those things out into the forest?
That doesn’t explain the bear reflection, though. The ghost bear. He knows something.
The surf/paddle boards being outside is no mystery if you’ve spent any time around rigs like this and the people who own them. They’re probably on a multi-destination trip that includes forest and surf, and probably rock climbing and mountain biking and perhaps caving and skydiving. So there’s a load of gear and not enough room to neatly stow it. It gets piled on the floor, the counter, the bed… It needs to be taken out of the van in order to actually have living space.
I guess they are no more obscure tail light topics?
The only thing weird is that someone would pay $200,000 for a van.
Though that’s likely the PNW, there are plenty of places near lakes and rivers that look like pretty much that in New England, too. A favorite kayaking place I go looks much like that. Motorized vehicles aren’t allowed in those areas, but parking isn’t far away.
That looks like a Pacific Pondersa Pine behind the van. Which only grows between California and Oregon, often close to the ocean before it hits the high peaks. As the entire forest isn’t actively on fire or has burned down recently, we’ll assume its in Oregon. Plus that fern coverage just scream “This is Oregon”. So, after concluding my study, Claire and Dustin are probably somewhere close to Brookings, Oregon. Where one can paddleboard, be in the forest and raise the price of rent so all the locals move while drinking kombucha, all in one day.
That last sentence is gold, GOLD ESBMW!
They’re too small, there is a gaming chair just plopped in there, and there is a literal gorilla in the back.
Alright, someone gotta go sciencey on ya. The angle of reflection equals the angle of incident, so from the viewing angle, the reflection is coming from approximately 20ft up, and outside of the frame left edge. Modeled/spotted bark, and edge of awning. Are you on pain killers?
Or also being sciency, maybe rather than there being a big graphic of a bear or dog 20 feet up, maybe there’s a graphic on the side of the van, half-showing thru the tinted glazing.
Check your meds. I suggested nothing of the sort.
What are you trying to say here then? That it’s not a bear, it’s bark, 20 feet up?
yup
Claire says, “I don’t have to outrun the bear, I just have to outrun you.”
I can’t tell the difference between Photoshop and AI, but I’m 100% sure this isn’t 100% real.
I wouldn’t say it is discriminating, but it is stereotyping.
Does stereotyping mean typing with two fingers?
Only if it’s one finger from each hand.
These folks *sometimes* surf or paddleboard or whatever that is, so they must take the boards on their tour. However, they take up a lot of interior space. So whenever or wherever they make camp, the boards are stored outside to make more room in the van.
Take your sensible and logical explanation and, just get out….. and don’t come back till you’ve rediscovered a sense of absurdity.
Not surprised the bear showed up after they wandered out of camp with the door left open. It would be more accurate if they included a last photo that had the fridge torn apart, seats shredded, all of their stuff scattered around, and a large pile of bear scat on the floor of the van.
My grew-up-in-an-Oregon-logging-town instinct is saying that’s a second-growth forest.
Pacific Northwest. Wet/dry suits (depending on temp).
Not that it matters. With that bear around, they’ll all be dead soon.
Van life sounds good until you realize for the price you can get a nice class C. Which is leaps and bounds beyond what this thing can do.
The cargo capacity of a van is usually 800 lbs and that includes passengers. Maybe a change of clothes and a bit of food and you over it’s weight limit. That is before any water.
Want to walk by each other, one of you is stepping outside. The toilet door is a curtain. Probably a shitcase style black tank.
New or used you can get a nice class C with 3k cargo, a real bathroom, bed, kitchen etc. If you don’t mind used and possibly used hard you can get a refurbished Crusin America Class C for under 60 (28 feet, no slides).
As a day tripper with an emergency toilet maybe. I would spend half that and get a conversion van for cruising to the next hotel.
See Mercedes article from yesterday as to why someone might be more interested in a custom Sprinter build versus a Class C, which are more than likely going to come from some Thor subsidiary…
I doubt that class C is getting to that particular hypothetical location either. Do you and I know that 95% of these trendy camper vans are going to end up at campsites? Yes. Do the people who think that they’re Dustin and Claire know this? No, no they do not.
but will a Class C let you take this stereotypical #vanlife photo?
https://www.instagram.com/p/CSKOGIBltMd/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
True that looks like hell to me.
$200k will buy me a pretty nice car to drive all over in and plenty of hotel nights…
A Class C occupies a different use case, though. I daily drive a Sprinter camper. It’s smaller than a Suburban, but with the slide out extended I have a full bed, a sofa, kitchen, bathroom… but I can still drive it into town without issue. A Class C is great if you’re driving between campgrounds and not leaving, but they become a huge pain for anything else. Hell, when I go into work I normally hang out in it during my lunch break so I can cook a quick meal and chill.
That said, I still think $200k is kooky. Mine is a DIY deal and closer to $20k.
The problem with a Class C is that they are giant so they don’t go down forest service roads that well and they are made of fiberglass or aluminum over particle board. My brother in law manages a RV repair shop and according to him their are no nice Class C RVs. They are all overpriced crap that will continuously fall apart. Heck recently they were delivered pre broken from the factory.
If these were paddleboards, I could see this in Tennessee. South Holston Lake has campsites pretty close to the water. But I think we’re looking at surfboards.
I can’t understand paying 200k for an ‘overlanding’ vehicle just to park 15 feet from someone in a campground, whatever the floatation devices are.
Dolly Parton is from Tennessee and has some pretty impressive flotation devices I’d like to park within 15 feet of.
This might be the first time I’ve heard a joke about Dolly Parton’s boobs since the 90s and I am HERE for it.
Really? I have a father-in-law who seems to make one, once a week.
Now that I think of it, every older dude I’ve ever known seems to have Dolly Parton’s boobs living rent free in their head. Granted, they never asked them to pay rent to begin with.
Older dudes? My best friend just turned 40, a couple of years ago, he went down to Dollywood to interview for some sort of merchandising/branding director position and came back all disappointed that the “boob lady” wasn’t on the interview panel. He did not get the position.
I mean, my father-in-law reaches for these jokes. When you’re literally at Dollywood, it would be impossible to not make them.
“Boob lady” is just a few months away from turning 79 years old, so the jokes are probably best left to older dudes. Also, Dolly is a national treasure, how disrespectful can a 40 year old be.
Boob ladies are notoriously picky about who they hire.
I’m all-in on #forestsurfing.
Thanks for the shout-out, Torch!
The photo with the people in it was indeed taken by a bear, and his reflection was caught in the window.
The photo without the people, but with their clothes hung up was CLEARLY also taken by the bear, but after he peeled and ate the people like so much chilled shrimp. The clothes are neatly hung up because the bear lives in these woods. He’s a bear, not a slob.
They aren’t a couple. Why would they be sitting so far apart? Claire isn’t even under the awning. When she accepted his invitation to head up to the coast for the weekend, she clearly didn’t realize it meant living in a van down by the river. She’s now regretting her decision and just waiting until she has had enough to drink to pretend to pass out and end the nightmare for the day.
It doesn’t take much to scratch below the surface a bit here. Two people in typical “van life” clothing, in an overlanding rig that frankly, neither looks as though they could afford. Two paddleboards. A bear.
These are spies. They’ve nabbed an important prisoner and he is tied up in the back of the van. They are enjoying a pre-torture kombucha before they begin the infamous “Get waterboarded in front of a live bear” interrogation.
Figuratively or literally, guts will be spilled here.
You’re a sick man Sid! * 😉
*The least that you can do is to finish the story, what happens next?! 😉
Given that this is a Tiffin rig, and after reading Mercedes’ story yesteday, I can only assume our couple is a pair of Thor operatives and Liz Amazing is tied up in the back of that van.
“The buybacks stop or the bear gets an early dinner, Ms. Amazing.”
LOL! ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ )
You would think that if there were water nearby, that it would be included in the theoretical shot. Regardless, Dustin and Claire having paddleboards isn’t shocking, as we are currently witnessing peak paddleboard, at least up here in the ADKs. Damn near everyone seems to have one now. I personally find kayaks to be more versatile as the water is too cold to swim in for 9 months a year.
Where was I? Oh yeah, it appears Dustin is enjoying his 7th kombucha, and is glad that he chose the $1500 bidet upgrade after he chose to sell his soon to fail tech startup in favor of #vanlife. Claire is considering shaving one side of her head and starting a TikTok/Instagram about “staying centered” and “living modestly” in a 180k van.
They will break up in 4-6 months. Probably not long after the “bear incident” where Dustin trips Claire in an attempt to “not outrun the bear, but just outrun you”.
All I know is that Dustin showed up in town. By himself. At his parents house. With the Van that actually belongs to Claire…Says he doesn’t know where she is? (maybe paddle boarding her way a new life in Mexico?) Other than this, Dustin ain’t sayin’ much. Nor are his parents.
A bear incident? That works for me also. Shit happens.
But just the same someone needs to keep an eye on Dustin…
Word has it Dustin’s parents have a second home in Florida…
Like others, maybe the picts were representing this area?
https://www.google.com/maps/@49.2068317,-124.1015622,828454m/data=!3m1!1e3?entry=ttu&g_ep=EgoyMDI0MDgyOC4wIKXMDSoASAFQAw%3D%3D
I think the Picts were representing part of what is now Scotland
Torch is so out of touch he doesn’t even know about Pine Surfing.
It will be replacing Breaking in the 2028 Olympics.
I was going to jokingly reply that Torch shouldn’t give the IOC any ideas; what with break dancing being an Olympic “sport” in 2024 and all. Deranged minds think similarly, I guess.
On another topic, I was watching Airwolf season 2 this weekend, as mentioned in the Autopian Asks segment. In one scene, Ernest Borgnine’s (Not Seven of Nine) character Dominic just out of the blue says paraphrased “break dancing was invented by a kid trying to still the hubcaps while the car was moving”. It didn’t have anything to do with the episode or the scene, it’s just kinda there and then the scene shifts.
Probably not in the script either, just old guy non sequiturs.
A lot of rich folks live in the Pacific Northwest and BC. There is a lot of old growth forest and surfing there. This looks like a lot of the spots on Vancouver Island near Tofino (or what they looked like 15 years, ago, been a minute since I was out that way). Either way there are tons of surf spots near old growth forest like this. Also part of the appeal of a van like this is permanent or semi permanent digital nomadism, so lots of cool outdoor toys being hauled even in places you may not use them.
I have been to many beaches along the Puget Sound where it’s dense forest that’s only like 20 feet from the water. That’s what I see here, though yeah with how they’re dressed, it seems a bit cold to go out on the paddle boards.
Oh and it’s obviously Sasquatch, again supporting that this is supposed to be in the PNW.
Was going to say, this very much looks like puget sound, or maybe the olympic penninsula. Doesn’t really seem weird to me if that’s the area.