Saying goodbye is never easy. It hurts. It’s a frame of mind that is backward-looking – one that looks far too closely at all of the energy that was expended and at the sorrow of a future that will never be. If you had asked me almost three years ago if I would be in a similar predicament to the one I found myself in during the spring of 2020, I’d have never believed it.
I’m still rescuing shitboxes. Granted, I still have my health, a little less youth, some far better wrenching skills, I still have the same house and I’m still writing about cars with David Tracy. Only now I work for him, and he has been the one lately unloading a cadre of vehicles from his abode so he could make some life changes. I still have many of the same cars as I did around three years ago as well. This is both a good thing and a bad thing.
It’s a good thing because I love them all, regardless of how poorly they treat me at times. It’s a bad thing because there is a constant drumbeat of other cool cheap cars that need rescuing showing up daily on my local searches. This is especially poignant due to the recent downturn in the used market. It’s also bad because I only have so much parking available.
Every year, more and more cars that were previously out of reach become economically feasible for each of us. That means that you’re facing a future where you’re continuously gauging whether that “newly affordable” F8 Green six-speed Dodge Challenger R/T you’ve been eyeing for the past six years is a better option than your current fleet of shitboxes.
Well, the day has arrived when I have resigned myself to selling one of my cars. And what better way to do it than to bring it to my homies here in Greater Autopia to help me decide?
Here’s the current list of pros and cons for each one. Please be gentle, these cars may not look like much, but “looking like much” may be vastly overrated.
1993 Dodge Stealth, base trim, 5-speed
This car has come a long way since we last read about it! It now has a shiny new MAACO paint job (I did all the bodywork myself, I just don’t have a paint booth) and is still running strong with 216,000 miles on the clock. That’s right: I drove this car 2,000 miles in three years. Mostly because it was sitting at the paint shop for most of COVID.
I found this car on the local (Wilmington, NC) Craigslist for $500 and was able to talk the seller down to $300. It had no 2nd gear at the time, a CEL, leaking valve covers, bad engine mounts, a beat-up interior, a bad window regulator, bad alignment/suspension components and paint that was Carolina sun-baked.
I ended up fixing all of the above—the replacement door panels are in my garage—along with a new LED 3rd brake light. I think I got one of the last ones on the internet. It’s slow and it has a ton of miles on it, but it has a five-speed manual and cold AC. These cars are very much going the way of the Spectacled Cormorant.
2005 Chrysler Crossfire Limited, 6sp
I got bitten by the Crossfire bug a couple of years ago and found the perfect (to me) version in Florida. Called out of work, rented a car, drove and picked it up that day for $3,500 (killer price). Sporty and fun with the six-speed manual trans and in probably the best shape of any car I have. It’s garage-kept and in great condition.
The issue with these cars is that there weren’t too many made and that Mercedes parts for them are going through the roof in price. In some cases, they are becoming really hard to find. For example, the SKREEM security units are not available from Chrysler dealerships any longer, nor via the aftermarket. If yours stops working, your car is a paperweight unless you ship your unit (along with your PCM and your key) to a small outfit on the West Coast to have them re-code it.
Keys are selling for $900. Used headlights are selling for $350. Windshield glass is becoming an expensive rarity. The next rock chip can spell certain doom. You can see where this is going for ownership of these cars.
Yes, the platform and running gear is all SLK320, but the body and interior have divorced parents that are estranged. There is very limited aftermarket support for this car and near zero dealership support/knowledge of them. With that said, values are slightly climbing and I’ve seen cars in worse shape than mine selling for $5,000.
This may be the last two-seater, manual transmission Chrysler, ever.
2002 Jaguar XK8
This is a weird one. The below pictures show what it looked like when I found it on Wilmington Craigslist for $300. Also, see my girlfriend’s facial expression regarding her thoughts on the matter.
“No wheels, didn’t run, cheap price” was the description. I got the guy down to $290, bought a junkyard set of wheels and tires and towed it home.
That’s when the “Jaguar ownership” side of the car started showing. “Valet Mode” was on and the car only came with a Valet Key. Valet Mode only allows the Valet Key to unlock the driver’s door and turn the ignition. The battery was dead and is located in the non-accessible-with-a-valet-key trunk.
Master Keys for the car are $1,200 at a dealership and the “tibbe” key type is not supported by most local locksmiths. That’s just one example of how seemingly needlessly, ridiculously, expensive parts can be for this car.
It took a ton of work to get the engine back to life also (see photo above). But hey, it’s now running, it’s British Racing Green with only 113,000 miles, and the AC works! I reupholstered some of the interior too.
Okay, honestly that’s about all the good there is here. It also leaks coolant, leaks oil, both seats are electronically fried in place (and require drilling to get the motors and seat frames out), the dash blower motor is shot which requires the entire dash to be removed, the top doesn’t work, there’s no radio, the headlights are leaking, the trunk is leaking, the rear shock bushings are completely gone, the paint is peeling…
I don’t want to give up on this thing after all the work I’ve done to it, but I feel like I could wrench on this car the rest of my life and still never get it right.
1994 Trans Am GT
It’s green, it has T-Tops, and yes it’s an automatic, but who cares. I bought it with a blown motor and threw a junkyard LT1 in it. Not an easy task, as it must go in from the bottom.
That motor turned out to be bad, so I had to throw a third engine in it. Interestingly enough, junkyard LT1s aren’t as easy to find as you think these days. I also deleted the rear Batmobile-type spoiler (way too flashy for my tastes).
I’ve lusted after this exact car in this exact color since I was a teenager, so it’s a bit of an early-years bucket list item, regardless of how many times GM’s cheapassery of that era boils my blood.
1994 Chrysler LeBaron Convertible
Dude. It’s gnarly. It’s rad-era teal and it’s a convertible.
I picked this one up for $200 in rough shape. It had rained in the car for years, so I replaced the busted, swampy interior and tuned up the suspension and drivetrain (plugs, wires, O2 sensor, tie rods, trans fluid/filter, etc.)
It’s now weeping coolant from the water pump and she smokes badly from worm valve stem seals, which is endemic to these Mitsu 3.0-liter engines. The top leaked and the radio had been recently stolen. It was a $20 junkyard unit. And no, I don’t understand meth-head logic either.
It’s currently under the knife getting a remanufactured rack & pinion since the OEM unit just started leaking all over my driveway recently. Interestingly enough, body parts are getting harder to find on these as they’re starting to disappear from this earth.
Example: the front turn lenses in the 1990+ models are just about unobtanium in non-cracked condition. They were made from cheap plastic that cracked in the sun. You can see this in the below picture.
I think I have one of only two in Wilmington.
1997 Dodge Ram
I love it, but I rarely use it. And I’ll be candid here and say it’s the one I’m leaning toward parting with the most.
I bought it for $600 with a blown trans and a cracked dash. Both were fixed and now it mostly sits in my driveway. It was super useful hauling engines for the Trans Am last summer, but as David showed us this week, renting a new-ish one from U-Haul is only $20.
This is a tough one because it’s one of the more utilitarian, valuable and useful vehicles I have and I feel like it’s a big pile of money sitting on 4 wheels in my driveway. I love it, but it’s not passionate love. More of a friends-with-benefits type of deal.
2004 Dodge Durango SLT
David loves the design of this truck, especially the headlights. Bought it for $400 with 225,000 miles on it and it has been a trusty tow vehicle for the fleet for the past six years. I used it to grab both my current Trans Am and previous Firebird Formula (both from Virginia) and tow them each back at 75 mph down I-95 with the AC on without breaking a sweat.
I replaced the usual wear items (rotors, compressor, fan clutch) but it’s been remarkably solid for a truck that was on its way to the crusher when I got it (for the bad compressor and high miles).
She’s up to 245,000 miles now and has never let me down once in six years. This one’s a keeper.
2013 Chrysler 300S
This car was gifted to me by The World’s Coolest Uncle, Jim Toukatly. He bought himself a new Model X and decided to gift me his old 300 as long as it “stays in the family.”
His father, my grandfather, insured Utica Chrysler Plymouth after the war, so everyone in my family drove Mopar starting in the ’60s since that company helped put food on the table. This is the background of my Mopar leanings.
This car will be given to my 7-year-old old nephew in nine years, so it’s going to stay. Plus, Mark Tucker also ended up with a badass 300 recently, so it’s pretty cool that 2 writers here have slightly different flavors of the same car. A future comparo write-up of his Varvatos V8 and my 300C V6 is upcoming if David approves/allows/is in a good mood that day.
Plus, it’s brown!
1993 Chrysler New Yorker “Salon”
Velour, grandma’s couch/living room on wheels, fake gold, fake chrome, fake wood… what’s there not to like?! I rescued this car from a back alley in a bad part of town for $500 last summer and brought it back to life after it was facing certain death-by-crusher.
I’m really glad that I did, as I get more compliments on this car than any other. Especially from younger Millennials and Gens Y & Z / These Kids Today With Their Devil Worshiping Rock & Roll Music. I think it’s weird too.
The dash is apart now while trying to fix a broken speedometer. If I can’t fix it (the part is unobtanium), I may just use a speedo app on my phone going forward.
This style of car is now extinct. I have one of the remaining examples.
2003 Dodge Stratus Coupe SXT
I bought this one in 2015 for $225 from a woman in Nashville, TN. Her daughter had just been in a front-end collision and had broken the radiator, but continued driving until the head gasket blew and the head warped. I filled it with water, limped it home and repaired it in my then-apartment parking lot. I also popped some sweet-ass hood pins in the mangled hood to keep it down.
I wrote my second piece ever here at The Autopian on this car; you can check it out here. It was the sophomore effort that kept me from becoming a one-hit wonder here, and I’m wicked glad it went over as well as it did with y’all.
The car was originally from Kentucky and has some nasty rust on the rockers and left quarter that serve as a badge of honor here in rust-free Coastal Carolina. I put a leather interior in it from a junked Sebring Coupe (see mismatched dash color), and that’s about it. It’s currently my daily. Under $1k invested has yielded eight years (!) of faithful service from this great little Mitsubishi-made machine.
1995 Buick Park Avenue Ultra, supercharged
You may have read about this recent purchase here, as it was brought about to smite that fancy-pants Publisher, Matthew B. Hardigree, and his new BMW. Yes, I know it looks like Shrek has been using it as a hovel in his post-fame years and that it also doesn’t do things like move under its own power or smell very nice. It’s also a health hazard, as it’s filled with mold and is also carrying a tank of bad corn-gas and what also seems to be a bad starter.
Okay, when I write it all out like that, it seems pretty much like a shoo-in for the one to get rid of out of everything listed here, but you would be underestimating my intense desire to win this upcoming pseudo-gauntlet I threw down at Matt and his BMW. Plus who doesn’t love a supercharged, green car that is the moldiest, grossest underdog on the planet?
A rebuild series (similar to David’s project Cactus) is envisioned here because writing about this type of car and scenario is so much more fun than writing about one on the opposite end of the spectrum, which would be: “I bought a tan ‘98 Camry with tan interior. There was nothing wrong with it so I put gas in it and drove it. Meh. The End.”
See what I mean?
2004 Chrysler Sebring Convertible
This is my 12th Sebring and also my most recent purchase. The last ICE drophead Grand Tourer from America’s #3 automaker, ever. They’re dirt cheap to buy, cheap to fix, cheap to run, very pretty and a very bold choice in my book.
This one was $600 and just needs a new battery and a trans service (ATF+4 only). Find another better, running $600 convertible. Go ahead, I’ll wait.
Yes, I know that my fervent defense of the Sebring Convertible places me in the minority around here, but I will stand firm on my beliefs and what I hold to be an open mind to all cars. Always see the best that there is to see. Always focus on positivity. Focus your Center. Balance your chi.
Now exhale slowly and say it with me: Seeeeebring.
Time To Choose
I know I may have a problem with owning too many cars, but hey, at least I’m passionate about something, right? Even if that something is a quiver of shitboxes. Also, have you counted up Mercedes’ fleet?
There’s also a sweet-ass Nitro R/T for $800 that I have been making moves upon that may also appear in my driveway in a couple of weeks. Who doesn’t love a Nitro? Oh, wait, what’s that? Most of car culture? Hogwash. Those trucks are gorgeous. How am I one of the few and the proud that think so?
Regardless, the herd must be reduced. Let’s hear which you would choose in the comments below, as I could use help from a rad and informed readership.
We don’t have a “thumbs down” button yet, but it’ll definitely be -1pt from me for anyone that responds with something along the lines of “they all suck!” The factory warranty expired long ago on most of them and they are still alive due to the love and care of passionate owners like The Collective We.
Thanks for your help, my Autopian friends!
All photos by Stephen Walter Gossin
Support our mission of championing car culture by becoming an Official Autopian Member.
Being the mopar aficionado I am I want to vote for the firechicken, um, er, Trans Am, but think the Ram might be a better real world choice if the Durango is covering most of your truck necessities. If it weren’t for the promise of a build and showdown between you and Matt I’d say cut the Buick loose, but I’m really looking forward to that series with you resurrecting this rolling FEMA site into a livable, functional car.
Sell the Stratus, the Ram, the LeBaron, the Jag, and the Crossfire. The Crossfire is going to be too expensive to fix eventually, and the Jag is a lost cause. The Stratus is a whatever car that would do better being driven by someone else. The Ram is superfluous since you have the Durango, and the LeBaron is meh and you can drive the Sebring if you want open air, and the New Yorker when you want some plush velour. If you want plush velour while driving in the open air, they sell seat covers.
Keep the Trans Am as a toy you keep improving over the years. The Stealth looks nice, but that could go when the Trans Am is all set. You could even try doing a manual swap in the Trans Am in the future.
The only reason why you’re keeping that Park Avenue is to produce Autopian content. Launch that thing into the sun once you’re finished wrenching on it.
Do you know how hard it is to find a car that is both green and supercharged? It certainly ‘aint easy.
Neither is pimpin’.
“The Stratus is a whatever car that would do better being driven by someone else.”
…what does that mean!? Are you sure? RainMan has nothing on me, I’m an excellent driver.
Thanks for reading!
The Stratus just seems like an average car, and I figure if you sell it, someone else is going to put it to use every single day. Rather than hanging out with its Mopar buddies in your driveway 🙂
I’d buy the Stealth today. Seriously. DM me.
Otherwise, sell the K cars.
Find me on Facebook: “Stephen Walter Gossin” or Instagram: stephen_gossin
Let’s find this machine a new home. Cheers.
Sometimes you have to let simple math make the decisions.
You’ve got at least $4000 more to put into that Jag before I’d even call it decent.
You can find a better Jag than that for less than $4000. The Jag must go.
Also, the Crossfire isn’t doing anything for you, really, and it’s going to drain you. You already explained how. It’s time to take a nice healthy profit while it’s still there. That goes too.
Going forward, beware of exotics. They’re exotic for a reason, and if you’re not getting several of them because parts cars are cheaper than their parts, they’ll break you if you pick the wrong one. (And then they’ll break you anyway.)
Also, whenever you decide to sell a car, sell two. Trust yourself, you’ll find more. Space in the driveway is valuable, mental space is priceless.
Ditch the new yorker, stealth and crossfire
How the hell did the Buick make the cut over the Crossfire and Stealth?!
Keep the dodge truck, Durango and 300
Why keep the truck, as someone who has a suburban, an excursion, a 62 continental…. And a Chevy 1500…. The truck is the most versatile, take it on a trip ( and bring home parts) take it to dinner ( and bring home parts ) take it to the grocery store ( and bring home parts.
It’s paid for itself 20 times over, before I kept a trailer hooked up to my excursion, yes I can fit a whole ass car inside but I don’t want to…. It stays because it can effortlessly tow 10k at 80mph with 6 people inside comfortably.
The suburban is on the clock….it’s older, and drives like a old station wagon, it’s comfortable and runs great….but it’s a big dookie.
My 62 is relegated to cruising around looking tough
So keep the truck because you’ll need it.
I’ll make it easy.
Keep the 300 and the Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag. Everything else goes.
Rationale: the Jag will keep you busy without making you a hoarder. The 300 is practical for driving, but not practical for twoing and hauling, so you’ll be less-inclined to buy a massive fleet again. Don’t feed the beast by leaving avenues open.
will keep you busy without making you a hoarder
— the BoxRocket Rationale
I love it!
I think it’s time to bag that Jag!
Keep the 300C and Durango, sell everything else and buy something fun to replace them, but focus on quality over quantity.
At the very least, get rid of the Jag, TransAm, New Yorker, LeBaron, Sebring, and Park Ave.
Keep the Stealth, Crossfire, and New Yorker. Sell/donate the rest (scrap the Jag and Buick). Mayyyyyybe keep the Durango in case you want to tow something else home – personally think you should use all your skill and knowledge to build a LoCost Seven or somesuch.
I’d definitely ditch the Buick or the Jag. Only pain can lie in the future with either of those. Like you, I’m a Mopar fan due to family influence from birth, but even I can’t get too excited about a Sebring (unless it’s the VERY pretty early ’00’s Sebring Coupe, sister to your Stratus.)
I’d call the Stealth the best DD in your fleet. Parts are still pretty plentiful for those, and it’s certainly the prettiest. Being a base model means less to break, and actually increases the rarity factor since they were less likely to be saved than the R/T models.
I have only one request. If you ever are looking to unload the New Yorker or the LeBaron, now or in the future, let me know. I’ve got a whole club full of crazy Rad-heads up here in the Triangle who would go nuts for them.
My grandfather’s last car was more or less that New Yorker, in maroon. He drove me to college in it a couple times, loved the easy ride and ample highway power (he’d inevitably drop the hammer a few times during the trip).
I thought that Stealth looked fantastic when it came out. Later I thought it looked a little silly, but not having seen one in a decade, I’m back to loving it.
The Jag is the one I can’t imagine keeping, and I have a HUGE soft spot for both Jags and BRG. It’s just… too damn much. You’ll never catch up, not if you keep getting other project cars (which you will).
If you don’t need the Ram, take the W and use the driveway space for the Nitro and whatever else comes next.
The LeBaron and Sebring are obviously redundant, but I won’t judge you if you keep both.
Otherwise, taken on your own terms, the whole fleet deserves to stay. You might get burned on the Crossfire, but it’s a great, unusual car.
I feel the exactly the same about the Stealth – great summation.
I liked the slightly softer-edged look of it compared to the Mitsu 3000GT stablemate when they both came out. After a bit, they both seemed overwrought in the styling department, esp. the dorky spoiler on the Stealth. Now, I love the low and wide but small sport coupe mojo, if only b/c it barely exists anymore. And pop up headlights, of course.
My grandfather also had one of those New Yorkers, maroon, Mark Cross Edition. Spoke to you when your “door was ajar”. It was pretty awesome to a 10 year old kid.
Keep:
93 Stealth
Crossfire
2004 Durango – tow rig
300S for family
2003 Stratus
2004 Sebring
sell everything else
Picking up a 12th car has actually sent me down the same path, oddly enough. I’m somewhat focusing on ‘eliminating duplication’, which is leading me to get rid of 3 or 4.
I’d choose between
1) Sebring & Stratus – I know they’re different underneath, but, they largely do the same thing. I’d probably keep the Sebring, because convertible, but, the Stratus being a known entity (and red) does have its perks.
2) New Yorker & LeBaron – They’re both Rad-type Chryslers, and will probably continue to be difficult as they age. I’m keeping the New Yorker and getting rid of the LeBaron – the teal is cool, but, it kinda doesn’t fit the car? And you’ll already have the Sebring.
3/X) Crossfire & Stealth – Wildly unpopular opinion, but, I’d get rid of both. The Stealth just never has done anyting for me (again, I know, I’m weird), and, I have 2 friends with Crossfires, one of them ‘needy’. Like you said, it’s not really a car you want to have once they get to the needy point. Crossfires either need to be kept garaged, with an open checkbook, etc, or get one that’s raggedy to start with, bypass all the Chrysler/MB BS with an aftermarket ECU, swap in an M113 V8, and just have kind of a rat-rod/track car/whatever type thing. I think in-between cars are going to start rapidly disappearing from the streets. Both of these seem to be worth some money, and it doesn’t seem like you use either of them much at all, so, bye to both.
4) Park Avenue – if you’re going to do the story, of course, keep it. If you want a still terrible but slightly easier time, I’m parting with a ’90 Deville that looks like hell, and it needs a ton of work, but, it runs, and the A/C works, and the interior is actually in decent shape for a Cadillac with 240k miles on it. I’ll even bring it to you! (I’m not far away). Whatever happens though, there’d have to be another showdown with the New Yorker down the road. And, I’d keep the GM, but, you’ve got time to decide if the New Yorker is really nice and worth the hassle or not.
5) XK & Trans Am – Sorry, but the Jag has to go. It sucks to get rid of something that you’ve put a bunch of work into, but, it’s not really worth having, and I think you know that, so I won’t harp on it. But, the Pontiac – because you like it, it’s the right color, you have it, you’ll have a bit of extra money from selling the Stealth & Crossfire, and you won’t have a ‘sporty’ car, I’d put a little money into this and keep it. You don’t mention if it runs, but, if it does, great. If it doesn’t – or, if you want to take it a little further – could easily drop a 5.3 in it and quit fooling around with the LT1s. It’s a ‘boring, overdone, typical’ blah blah blah swap, but, every single thing doesn’t need to be the most difficult version of itself. Keeping the 4L60 is fine, 6L80 swapping it is cool, T56 swap is even cooler, or, T5 is coolest of all – I feel like you’re not the type to mercilessly beat the shit out of something, so a healthy T5 should be fine behind a 5.3, and much cheaper and easier than a T56.
6/7) Keep the Durango, Keep the 300, exchange the Ram for some cash if you want it gone. The truck will always have value, and you’ll always be able to liquidate it pretty quickly and easily. Keep it if you want, sell it if you want, doesn’t matter.
That’s my list, roughly half of what you have now. Don’t think you’re looking to get rid of that many, but, some food for thought in going about the process.
I just wanna see a steam cleaning video of that shart stain in the passenger seat of the Sebring
oh my gosh, this would be the most satisfying yet horrifying video on the internet
I’m really hoping that it is a coffee or tea stain. Really. Hoping.
Open your own salvage yard
“Nobody should know too much about their own destiny.” -Dr. Emmett Brown
Please Please Please Sell the Jag… It will break you. It’s the automotive equivalent to wack-a-mole. You’ll fix one thing at great expense and two more will pop up.
You’re right. I’m learning that first hand; after installing a new head on the engine, it’s still mostly a non-moving machine.
My mama didn’t raise no quitter though.
These are all great Jalop- I mean Autopian rides!
Sell the crossfire, truck, and “cloud cars”.
The term “Cloud Cars” only includes the 4-door Cirrus, Stratus and Breeze. Each moniker relating to a cloud or to a weather phenomenon for a trio of cars built by Chrysler.
The 2-door Stratus technically isn’t a Cloud Car (regardless of the name), as it was made by Mitsubishi.
It’s weird, I know.
Man, I’m not trying to be mean, but your crap-tastic lot of mostly 90’s/2000’s Mopar junk makes me feel better about my crappy fleet of junk. Albeit not in a shared misery kind of way. Keep the Stealth because even base models look cool. Keep the Crossfire, because you own the only version of these cars worth owning. Keep either the truck or the Durango, because towing is important. Keep the 300C because you already have a plan to dump it on some (hopefully) unsuspecting family member. Ditch the rest of those cars. The ones that are desirable models are woefully completely broken (maybe just keep the one you like the best and focus your efforts there). The rest are undesirable, pseudo-lux-o-barges from the era where Chrysler didn’t even know how to do that well. The 80’s, 90’s, and well into the 2000’s were a rough time for most American auto makers. Although there were a few gems of hope and good design in that era, there isn’t a lot of them. Remember, and I’m sure someone in your life has already told you this, just because it’s cheap doesn’t mean you need to buy it.
Sell priority you can stop after #3.
1. Jag goes now!! that cat needs top be put down.
2. Ram you don’t need a tow rig and a truck. Trucks sell easy.
3. The Sebring and Lebaron. Sell them in Scranton for extra money to M. Scott.
4. The New Yorker
5. Avenger I mean Stratus
6. Stealth daily this if it stays to be cooler 110% over the Stratus.
7. Trans Am the TV garages have already done these many times over.
8. Durango no longer need a tow rig if garage is only runners.
9. Crossfire
10. 300S yes it’s fam but they did not help you by feeding your addiction.
11.You have written your bed and you must sleep in it now. Go find a donkey to pull that Park Ave around till you get it running. The donkey might just become your best friend.
I’d tell you a thousand times over to get rid of that awful Park Avenue before you wind up on a ventilator with a fungal infection in your lungs, but you have a work-related plan for it. Fine. Hang on to the automotive equivalent of swamp ass and hope for the best.
With the Buick having a get out of junkyard free card we can focus on the rest of your flock. Sell the Ram, the New Yorker, the Jaaaaaaag, and either the Sebring or the LeBaron. I’d have a hard time choosing between the Chrysler drop tops because you clearly have to keep one of them. Keeping the LeBaron after selling the New Yorker means you still have a K car, which keeps the wrathful spirit of Lee Iacocca from cursing the rest of your adventures. The 2004 Sebring is objectively a better car in every way though.
That frees up four spaces. If you need more than that, I would put the Stratus, Firebird, and Crossfire on the chopping block next. 3rd gen Firebirds are plentiful. Crossfires are not, and you’ll eventually have to decide how much time and money you want to pour into this car when you have others that need work.
Hello, you write for a website that needs content and March is coming up. this clearly calls for an elimination bracket (could also do one for Mercedes, and David will probably have enough by then for his own as well). Just keep the top 4 finishers.
If it was me, I would keep the Durango, New Yorker, Park Ave, and 300. The rest are cool, but you want someone who has less cars than fingers on a hand to be caring for and hopefully using them.
Get this man his brefass scotch. Goshdarnit, that’s a great idea.
Well thanks Stef! Beer for breakfast, scotch (and bourbon) for after work.
Ok Derek Zoolander
I can turn left though I’m not sure I can say the same about all the cars here.
How long until you buy a Dodge Magnum in Blue Steel?
We seem to have similar tastes.
I’ll help by gladly taking that New Yorker off your hands. The cluster isn’t easily repaired, but they use the same signals as the earlier K-cars, especially the ones with the digital clusters. Can be swapped easily.
After reading the justifications, here’s what I’d keep:
– Crossfire (rare bird! although maybe it’s a sell if you’re falling out of love with it)
– Trans Am (hell yeah dream cars)
– 300S (only because you’re getting rid of it soon)
– New Yorker (this thing slaps—maybe pour a bit more into aesthetic improvements, but it’s a solid couch on wheels)
– Durango (gotta have a towpig for what you do, and welp, sounds like you’ve got a decent one here)
Maybe the teal car if you really want a convertible around. Maybe. I’m really only putting it as a maybe because I have a soft spot for teal. I gave the nod to the Crossfire instead because you’ve gotta have at least one truly nice car, and it’s already further along. Plus, I like weirdos.
I want to read the rebuild stories on a few of the others, like the Park Avenue Ultra, but ultimately, those should flow out of the yard to a good home. Pour the cash into new flips or cars you clearly care about a lot, like the Trans Am.
It sounds like the Ram’s already halfway out the door, but the Durango should do the trick on haulin’. My counterpoint to David’s glowing rental review is that renting trucks gets annoying, and U-Haul’s extra fees turned the $20 a day or whatever into $90 for me once when I had to take the 944 to a shop, just on distance alone. There’s a lot of catches and buts on those loans to the point where I usually just rent from a local place that caters more to industry folks instead, and has fewer asterisks and footnotes on mileage and use.
I like your style, Stef! Always a fan of your musings; thank you. Cheers!