Something crazy happened to me in the end of January, and I think it’s time I told you. It’s something your parents say is natural, that most of us do, but that still makes you uncomfortable every time you’re caught doing it: I celebrated my birthday. And I did it in Colombia. As for why we did it in Colombia, it was a classic case of a being added into a group chat with all your friends titled *destination* and date.

Had any of us been to Colombia before? No. Have I watched every season of “Narcos” and developed a somewhat justified but also likely exaggerated fear of an otherwise beautiful country? Yes. Did I go anyway, pissing off my parents in the process? Also yes. But here’s the thing: Since being with The Autopian, I’ve become a car-brained idiot who can’t help but focus on shitboxes and car culture everywhere I go, so now I gotta tell y’all about the beautiful world of Colombia and the cars within. ¡Vamos!

Traffic Culture

For starters, I’m a little travel rusty. My last time leaving the country was to Canada in 2023 when I paid my way into shooting the Grand Prix of Toronto (hey check this photo from it aren’t I cool?), Outside of that trip, it’s been seven years since I’ve left the continent at all, which is to say I don’t really remember what other countries feel like, but I do know that Colombia felt pretty damn wild.

I remember one of my old business classes teaching us about organizational versus fluid structures, where the former could be thought of as a Windows computer that’s strictly categorized into folders, while the latter is macOS with everything thrown at you in a seemingly chaotic way. If the States is Windows with our strict traffic laws and stoplights, then Cartagena is the ninth circuit of Apple hell on the road.

(Video Credit: Brendan Corrigan — The Corrigan Cast)

I truly can’t recall a single stoplight between the airport and the Walled City of Cartagena, and even then, there was maybe only one or two stop signs. What I definitely can recall is the constantly revving engines from the almost exclusively manual drivers as they searched for the clutch’s biting point.

What I remember even more than that, though, was the noise: the persistent honking that infected your ears. For what it’s worth, the honking wasn’t disrespectful like how it always is here, where each honk says “hey buddy, you’ve mildly inconvenienced me and now I pray your car explodes.” Rather, these are polite honks, with drivers beeping to let the neighboring driver know they’re coming up on each other.

We stayed in the Walled City, which was built on the tail end of the Middle Ages/Early Renaissance. That meant traffic was real different in this area, as the streets were only really built for buggies and horses and were probably 10 feet across at best? Most cars there were smaller hatchbacks and commuter sedans that had no problem with the small streets, but every once in a while you’d see a box truck or a full size SUV come through and it looked like the Ever Given in the Suez.

Overall though, the Walled City is an incredibly cute, very historic area filled with endless food, great bars with incredible music (so long as you like a lot of Afrobeat and turn of the century hip hop), and it was hyper-pedestrian friendly in a truly incredible way that I already miss and will always wish the States had a little bit of.

[Ed Note: One thing I miss about Germany are the Fußgängerzone , which are pedestrian-only downtowns. I love cars, of course, but it’s just cool walking down a long strip of stores and restaurants without having to dodge cars. -DT]. 

But instead of waxing poetic about public policy and the benefits of mixed use developments, I’m gonna show y’all some of my favorite cars (and other people carrying machines!) I saw while in beautiful Cartagena. I’m also gonna almost exclusively focus on cars not sold in the USDM. Also worth noting these photos aren’t all incredible: they were overwhelmingly snapshots I got while walking to the next destination during our tight itinerary. Okay enough said, car time.

The Good

Horsies – Year, make and model unknown.

These carriages could presumably hold one very large person, likely up to six small people. Note the wooden wheels and leaf springs. Horsepower: one.

Unknown Chevrolet Taxi

Now the funny thing is, Chevy offers a car in Colombia called the ChevyTaxi and Chevytaxi Premium, the latter of which looks to be a rebadged Chevy Sail. Based off that alone, it’s pretty safe to say that this is, indeed, a ChevyTaxi considering it is equal parts a Chevrolet and a Taxi, but I’ve done a whole four minutes of research and can’t say conclusively whether or not this Chevy Taxi is actually a ChevyTaxi.

[Ed Note: This looks like a Chevy Matiz, which is an amazing global car that we really should write a deep-dive on, because the thing was built in Romania, Pakistan, Uzbekistan, Poland, Iran, Taiwan, and on and on. It’s just an awesome cheap car. -DT]. 

Anyway, why is it in the “good” category? Because it has a spoiler and a baby diffuser on a car that will never need such mods. So why have it? Well, you decorate your desk at work, don’t you? Take pride in your work, no matter what that work is, I say. We saw a couple other small hatchbacks with spoilers too…

Kia Picanto Ion

This one I love for all the same reasons as the last: taxi hatch with a spoiler. Stupid but fun. After doing some research and trying to match the rear end to some press photos, I can pretty confidently say it’s from the Kia Picante generation that started in 2011, which would make it an otherwise pretty unremarkable hatch in terms of its looks.

But again: the taxi version had a spoiler so we support it!

Nissan Frontier Ambulancia

If my research is correct, this one is a 4×4 diesel that’s fitted with the 2.4-liter4-four-cylinder diesel that’s good for 161 horses and 297 lb-ft torque. Why is this in the good list? Commuter sized engine with diesel performance and because it literally saves lives.

Toyota Land Cruiser Prado

There’s hardly anything to say about these that others haven’t, but the mainstream nature of a Land Cruiser doesn’t make them any less lovely. Although if we’re being honest, until recently, I didn’t know about the history of the Prado line and how the States technically only get Prados now. That knowledge alone is the reason I’m including it here.

Kia K2700-Double Cab

Unfortunately for all these new-school car guys, this isn’t not quite a kei-truck, but it has similar bones. While I’m on record of wanting an old-school, fat square truck from at least 40 years ago, I’m generally anti-truck. Still, seeing ones like this make for a happy ignorant, misinformed city boy who was told that a small truck like this can give you all the same benefits as a full sized 1/2+ ton truck. It has a 2700 CC engine that’s good for 89 horses and 121.7 lb-ft torque. And that’s probably enough!

The Fine

Nissan March

“We’re having an unremarkable car contest, you should enter!” said the contest organizer, not knowing that Nissan already won it. This is what a kid would draw if you told them to draw a boring car. It’s what you would find playing an open-world video game that doesn’t have the rights to any actual cars so they had to make a generic one. Why is it in the “fine” category? Because it’s done literally nothing to earn anything higher. It’s worth noting that they did offer a Nismo version at one point, but I still don’t care. [Ed Note: I absolutely do care. I love cheap transportation. -DT]

Suzuki S-Presso

I almost thought about promoting this one to the “good” section, but after researching it: it has a sub 1-liter engine, clocking in at 998 cc with its inline-3 engine. Across the combinations of its two engine and transmission options, it makes 68 horses at best and 56 at worst, with that engine propelling a body that weighs about 1700 lbs. for the petrol option and clocks in around 1800 lbs. if you have the CNG variant. Light with a small engine, boring body…screw it. It’s promoted to good.

[Ed Note: Yeah, this is legitimately cool. 56 horsepower in 2025?! WHAT? -DT]

Renault Logan 

It may share its name with our favorite member of the X-Men, but this Logan has nothing in common with the Wolverine! This car is small, it has a metal skeleton, it’s so “car” in its basic design it could be timeless and live for hundreds of years and never be out of place, and it hates people named Scott. Shit, this actually might have more in common with Wolverine than I thought…

Anyways, it’s small inline-four engine that can run on petrol, diesel, and flex-fuel. It’s remarkably unremarkable. [Ed Note: The Renault/Dacia Logan deserves some love. It’s a true global car, made in Romania, Russia, Colombia, Morocco, and I can go on. It’s put many countries on wheels, and for that it has my respect. -DT]. 

Nissan Frontier 

You were so much cooler as an ambulance. 5/10 you’re fine. Just fine.

Toyota Fortuner 

Now I’m gonna give this one some credit because I just learned that it’s built on the same platform as the Hilux, and the Hilux is almighty, but I still think this guy is a little boring at best. It’s got a V6 option though which nothing else on the list so far has so there’s a bonus point on it, but just look at it…

Ford Explorer

This is Colombia. Go back to the States and patrol Walmart parking lots you narc. Are you a cop? You gotta tell me if you’re a cop.

Kia K3

I’m sure it’s a fine car, but it’s also just a sedan. I’m pretty confident it was the newest car I saw during my time in country, so it’s worth noting what some folks with a little more scratch want in a contemporary car.

Hyundai H-1

Hyundai, you’re a coward. You don’t have a van on sale in the US and you have this perfectly serviceable van right here ready to go. What are you doing? Why are you keeping us from a sensible thing that we would get so much use out of? Either give us the Staria or give us the H-1, but give us something.

It’s also worth nothing that Google’s AI search assistant is still dumb as rocks and can’t do a damn thing right.

Anyways, who wants to see the actual cool vehicles?

The Marvelous

The Prawn Boat – Model Unknown, Colombian Operators

When you’re on a boat tour across private party islands outside of Cartagena and some kind men come by and offer you drive-by prawns, you say yes dammit. Okay I didn’t actually say yes, I don’t know where he got those prawns from and don’t know how he prepared them. What if I got food poisoning?! Gross. 10/10 would daily drive.

(It’s worth noting that I did get food poisoning, and I know for a fact I got it on the last night after eating a bunch of street meat from vendors. It lasted almost two weeks and I was still sick at King of the Hammers but I’m very brave and strong.)

Submarine – Nuclear Capabilities Unknown

Pull up to the function in one of these and ain’t nobody gonna tell you nothing. Dripped out in your best multi-cam gear, nuclear briefcase in hand, big iron on your hip. Oh yeah, you drive one of these bad boys and the world will know you’re the shit. 10/10, would cautiously hover over the button to launch ICBMs.

AKT Karguero 3W 200 – Nuclear Capabilities Also Unknown

This is a “hell yeah” machine if I’ve ever seen one, brother!!! What’s better than a dirt bike? A dirt bike that you turn into a pickup truck. And for clocking in at a smooth $3,600 USD, why the hell wouldn’t you want one of these? Just imagine picking up your date in this, telling them get comfortable in the back and hold on for dear life because you don’t got no seatbelts and you’re about to whip this bad ting to a blistering 15 mph. 10/10, would haul for oddjobs and pick up babes.

These Sick Ass Buses

I know so little about these and couldn’t find the owners (not that it would’ve made much differences because my Spanish is “horrible” [Spanish for “subpar, actually”]), but just look at them! They immediately reminded me of Steve’s story about India’s beautiful hand-painted trucks. Stunning work, I wish I had a reason to hop in and ride them (pause).

Chevrolet Grand Vitara

This thing is cute as hell! We got these as Chevy Trackers in the U.S., but it doesn’t make these Suzuki-based SUVs any less cool.

Renault Duster

I saw a handful of these around the city and really liked them. Normally sold as a Dacia but rebadged as a Renault in Latin America, it looks like a solid city vehicle that I’d be happy to take on a trail when the moment arises. Looking at Renault’s press photos of it, though, it looks like just another crossover so maybe I’m smoking something crazy that has me hallucinating. While I haven’t talked about it on any other car, it is worth nothing that this thing has some pretty abysmal safety ratings in its two airbag configuration and kinda just in general so take that as you will.

Volkswagen Saveiro (Gol)

UTE SUPREMACY BABY! I’m jealous of our friend Lewin for two reasons: 1) He’s a fantastic writer, and 2) He lives in the land down undah where there’s utes a plenty and I so desperately want one. Just how sick is it to have a car-sized platform with a bed in the truck? And you can get this bad boy with a 5-speed, letting you punch gears all day in the German branded (but Brazilian manufactured) ute. God I love it.

Oldsmobile (Model Unknown, Likely 88 or Series 60 Convertible)

It’s really hard to get a meaningful ID on this car because it checks a lot of the boxes that an 88 does, but also shares more elements with a 4-door Series 60, and yet I’m not seeing that Oldsmobile made a 4D Convertible Series 60. So while I don’t know for certain what I’m looking at here, I know I love the curves of an old machine and smiled when I saw this 40s/50s car sitting in the walled city. It was likely the oldest car I saw too!

Buick (Likely Special Series 40, Less Likely a Super or Roadmaster)

But we’ve got a second octogenarian in the ring! This is an old ass Buick, which you can tell based off the very blurry badge on the rear of the car. Looking at the car’s three ventiports on the front fender (just learned what ventiports are, I’m pretty cool), we can pretty comfortably rule out something a Roadmaster, but, like with the Oldsmobile, I’m struggling to find any info on 4-door convertibles from factory. So unless these two were custom jobs…I don’t know.

Mazda B Series

Again, and I cannot stress this enough: I’m not a huge fan of big American trucks, but all other trucks are fine to me, especially little ones like this. What can I say, I share DT’s affinity for a good, small ole truck that gets a job done! And yanno what, this car was often nothing more than a badge-engineered Ford Ranger anyways so it checks the box of a rugged, work ready mini-truck.

Fiat, Model Unknown (Likely 130, 170, or 684)

This tow truck absolutely baffled me because I simply didn’t know it existed. What do you mean Fiat doesn’t exclusively make really cute small town cars?!  [Ed Note: They also made tractors! -DT] The fact that this thing not only exists, but is also in good enough working order that it was dispatched to tow a (relatively) brand new bus really amazed me. That’s resilience and care for a machine that made me smile.

More Photos Because Why Not?

To quote Mark Twain: “Travel is the fatal enemy of prejudice,” and trips like this reinforce that truth. As I sarcastically said earlier, I went into Colombia cautious and guarded given its relatively recent history so expertly but hyperbolically depicted in shows like “Narcos.”

Nevertheless, I left with love in my heart. I left with a new tattoo to commemorate my travel there and a desire to speak more Spanish around town when the opportunity arises. I have a deeper appreciation of a culture I never would’ve thought of experiencing, and the desire to take more flights and see the world as soon as I can. So stay tuned for more in the event I decide to pony up the cash to travel again because god damn I’m in debt now (Colombia was actually really cheap, I just bought a very expensive Hot Wheel and am absolutely screwed now).

Anyways, that was the article. That’s it. Go to Colombia if you can because you won’t regret it. Bye!