Home » I Went To Europe For The First Time And The Cars, Roads, And Driving Broke My Brain

I Went To Europe For The First Time And The Cars, Roads, And Driving Broke My Brain

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This month marked a major milestone in my life. For the first time ever, I left the borders of the United States for another country. Freshly minted passport in hand, I traveled to Germany and then France. I expected Europe to be different than America in many ways, such as how driving works, but also similar, with mostly familiar cars on the road. France, however, completely thwarted my expectations and blew my mind for the couple of days I was out there. Vive la différence, but man, la différence was really twisting my melon. 

Sadly (for me, and hopefully for you!), we’ve reached the end of my article series about my first-ever trip outside of America thanks to Audi’s invitation to the 2025 S5 launch. I’ve long wanted to experience car culture around the world, and while this trip wasn’t very long, it gave me my first taste of what I hope will be many more globetrotting adventures to come. But first: France and Germany! 

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I’ve said it before, but this trip was very different for our site. Normally, we’d send a freelancer on a trip like this, because losing a full-time staffer for nearly a week is not ideal [Ed Note: especially when we’re losing a talented, prolific, Premium Quality staffer – Pete]. And we generally don’t write much about the travel aspects of press trips. We usually just pop in the “Full Disclaimer …” boilerplate about the automaker footing the bill and get back to writing about the car. 

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Some French coastline, I think? Courtesy of a Google Pixel 8 Pro and a window seat.

We’re not a travel blog after all, and it’s easy for world-weary authors to forego “I can’t believe I’m in [cool place]” gushing when it’s old hat to them. But it’s an entirely new hat for me! Pretty much everyone on staff had left their respective countries for exciting ports abroad, and I didn’t even have a passport. The whole team saw me getting my passport as something to celebrate, and this trip with Audi was a great way to get a first taste of international travel. The fact that I was there to review a car was even better!

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If you’re reading about my journey for the first time, here’s a refresher: I started by talking about how airport lounges make the airport experience downright lavish. Then I covered what flying in the highest class on an international flight is like. Later, I talked about the car I drove out there. Now, let’s talk about, you know, actually driving in Europe.

My journey started when my United Airlines Boeing 787 Dreamliner landed in Frankfurt. Immediately upon exit, Germany proved to be a very different place. I walked up a jet bridge only to end up in a room with a staircase. Passengers from the plane dragged their luggage up this staircase and the whole time I felt like that whole thing was unnecessary.

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I think that’s more France. Look closely and you’ll see a cool-looking coastal highway wrapping around mountains, I want to drive it.
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Okay, this one is definitely the coastline of Nice, taken right before landing.

I was so happy that my first-ever passport stamp was going to come from Germany. My family lineage on my dad’s side traces back to Germany, so it felt cool that maybe, in the smallest of ways, a part of me returned home or something. I was super excited about this and I couldn’t hold it in when I handed my passport to the Bundespolizei or the German federal police. Well, the officer definitely didn’t match my energy. She asked me how long I was going to be in Europe, stamped my passport, and sent me on my way without ever changing her facial expression.

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Why didn’t VW just slap a two-tone paint job on this van and call it the Buzz?

Once I landed in Nice, France, I expected an experience both similar and different from what I’m used to in America. I expected the roads to be narrow. I expected the signage to be different. And I expected to see tight spaces and lots of roundabouts.

And for some reason, I expected traffic to be light, and for most of the cars to be Euro versions of what have in America. Seriously, I expected to see stuff like Toyota Corollas and Honda Civics, just with amber turn signals and such. I even planned on doing a European car-spotting thing, thinking I’d only occasionally catch a weird car I’d never seen before.

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I was surprised the moment I left the terminal – it was very much the other way around. I’d say about 95 percent of the cars I saw on the roads of Nice were machines we just don’t get in America in any capacity. My car-spotting plans were for naught because basically every single car I saw was something I had only seen online or in video games. I couldn’t keep up with photographing the overload of OMG, and I soon had to give up because I was giving myself a migraine.

The photos below were taken from the passenger seat of the Audi S5, from my phone placed on the dashboard, or while stopped in traffic:

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Right out of the gate, I noticed that this part of France was addicted to the Renault Twingo. There was basically a constant parade of all three generations of Twingo on practically every street. However, based on what my eyes saw, it seemed the most popular Twingos in Nice were the first and third generations. I did not see a ton of classic cars out there, but I saw countless first-generation Twingos. Sometimes, those cars were packed four French guys deep and all of them were puffing on what I assumed to be a Winston cigarette.

The variety of cars I saw out there was something else. One moment I was marveling at an old Fiat Panda, the next I was left slack-jawed by a street-parked vintage RV. I saw countless Nissan Jukes, tiny hatchbacks that made me feel like a biologist observing undiscovered species, and plenty of cars from Citroën’s DS division.

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Perhaps most surprising of all was just how popular quadricycles were. I’ve always known that the quadricycle was an option for European buyers but thought maybe they would be a rare sight. I was very wrong. I lost count of how many Citroën Amis I saw and there were even more Chinese things that looked like they were descendants of Jason’s Changli.

I then discovered what counts as a French shitbox, and it’s my beloved Smart Fortwo! I frequently scanned the sides of the road and was surprised to see lots of Smart Fortwos in a sorry state. I’m talking about mismatched wheels, flat tires, missing panels, and being covered in so much dust that you know they haven’t run in years. A part of me wants to go back to France just to rescue these cars, like a highly specific version of Vice Grip Garage.

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Weirdly, there wasn’t a ton of Smart variety out there. I expected to see some original Forfours or maybe a Roadster or two. Instead, I saw a lot of second-generation Fortwos, a handful of third-generation Fortwos, a lot of second-generation Forfours, and a couple of first-generation Fortwos. I understand that Smart never sold many of the original Forfour and the Roadster was a reliability disaster, but I hoped that I’d see maybe one of these cars still kicking it out there.

Another surprise was just how few larger vehicles drove down those French roads. I wasn’t expecting F-150s or anything like that, but maybe some Euro-spec Ford Rangers and some of Volkswagen’s European crossovers. Now, I did see some really cool trucks in Germany and Germany was also crawling with all kinds of Opels, but France didn’t have any of that.

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If I did see a truck, it was usually a cabover truck just a little bigger than a Kei truck with the same kind of tray with folding walls. Semi-tractors and other commercial trucks were also of the cabover form factor, which I expected. But I also loved to see that European truck drivers love pimping out their rigs, sometimes even more than American truckers do. The most surprising truck I saw, which I couldn’t whip my phone out fast enough to take a photo of, was a Ram 3500 tow truck. What was that doing in France? It just barely fits in the narrow lanes.

In fact, France’s cars were so different to my American eyes that my car-spotting focus shifted from what I thought would be unique European vehicles to American cars that were common stateside but genuine rarities on the roads of France and Germany. So, I found myself getting excited when I saw a Jeep Renegade and a Wrangler that had been purchased at a dealership in San Diego and then imported over at some point.

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I was also fascinated by French Harley-Davidson motorcycles. French bikers are smart enough to wear a bunch of gear, but they’re no different than their American counterparts when it comes to mods. I saw and heard countless blacked-out motorcycles with loud pipes, tall bars, and just about every other mod you’d see on a summer day in Milwaukee. Heck, when I was at the resort I could have sworn that Nice sounded just like Milwaukee with the sounds of loud Harleys tearing up blacktop nearby.

All of this is to say that if you like European cars you have to get yourself over to Europe. Your brain might just fracture at the overload of Euro rides. Trust me when I say it’s so overwhelming that you’ll never be able to get all of the pictures you want.

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What about driving in France? This one was a mix of the expected and the unexpected. I expected the signs to be in French and I expected the speeds to be in kilometers. I also expected the roads to be narrow. But oh boy, those expectations don’t really prepare you.

The first thing I noticed on the roads around Nice is that French drivers are very nearly lawless. Nobody obeys the speed limit, everyone just does their own thing in the country’s many roundabouts, and sometimes, it seems these drivers have little regard for their own safety.

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In America, we have wide lanes, big shoulders, and runoff areas besides those. Even our cities tend to have just a little bit of buffer between the street and things you can slam your car into. France gives you no real margin for error. There aren’t shoulders, curbs come right to the edge of lanes, and rock faces sometimes jut out into your lane.

French drivers aren’t fazed by any of this. They’ll happily putt around at 100 km/h (62 mph) in an 80 km/h zone (50 mph) on roads barely wider than their cars are. Oh, and French roads are pretty wild in that they’ll just randomly reduce to 1.5 lanes or 1 lane in size without any real warning. Usually, the road gets smaller because of rocks or something, and French drivers hit these at speed, or slam their brakes at the last second when they realize their Citroën C4 Cactus isn’t fitting between the rock face and the delivery truck that’s ramming its way through. Speaking of delivery trucks and vans, their drivers don’t even bother slowing down for speed bumps, and it’s hilarious watching them bounce down the road immediately after.

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Mountain roads sometimes get legitimately terrifying. Often, the only kind of guardrail you get are piles of neatly stacked bricks that won’t stop you from going over, but usually, there’s no guardrail or stops at all. It was on the mountain roads that I answered a question I’ve had for so many years: Ever since I was a kid, I wondered how Europeans keep their cars between the lines in somewhat wide cars.

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The answer is they don’t, or at least, not the French drivers I saw. Most of the mountain curves I drove in the S5 were of the blind variety. I couldn’t see what was around the bend and neither could the drivers on the oncoming side. Yet, those drivers in the oncoming lane frequently crossed the center line in those blind curves. My driving partner constantly stabbed the brakes in near misses. I sometimes had to do the same, but I began to anticipate the moves of these mountain drivers and managed to squeak by without slamming the stop pedal often.

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The mountains were also where I discovered that speed limits don’t exactly work the same in France as they do in America. When I drove the Lotus Emira on the Angeles Crest Highway, I faced speed limits around 40 mph to 55 mph. Most regular cars could have handled the curves at those speeds fine. In France, I saw 80 km/h speed limits on mountain passes, but switchbacks and hairpins did not support going those speeds. In America, you’d usually see a sign telling you the maximum recommended safe speed for a turn, but France seems to trust that you know you can’t actually go 80 km/h around these curves.

Combine all of this together and France was just pure chaos. Nearly everyone was speeding, nearly everyone was crossing the center line, nearly everyone was smoking, and sometimes it even seemed like red lights were a suggestion for some people.

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I had to ask about this, so I talked with multiple European Audi representatives and other American journalists. The American journalists confirmed that they also had the same experiences on the road. The Audi representatives then explained to me that France is a little different than Germany. The part of France we were in wasn’t littered with cops and speed cameras, so it’s sort of controlled chaos. One bilingual local asked me if I saw any crashes. I pointed out that I didn’t and they told me that’s because French people know how to drive.

Audi’s people told me it’s very different in Germany, where the roads are more orderly, people try to be closer to the speed limits, and the country isn’t afraid to fine you using only camera evidence.

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All of that aside, it was also interesting to notice just how different the infrastructure was in Europe. Here in America, we’ll build gigantic parking lots for thousands of cars. In France, there are handfuls of tiny parking lots that are always full and street parking stalls that are also always full. Two journalists in my wave somehow managed to escape to Monaco for a short time and they told me they just couldn’t find parking at all, so one guy got out and took pictures while the other guy kept driving around.

Pulling off of the road like one can do in America isn’t really a thing. The roads are so tight, you better hope there’s parking where you want to stop, or you aren’t stopping. But all of this adds to the beauty of the cities, which are unlike anything you’ll find here in America. The buildings are generally vintage if not downright historic, stuck close together, and accommodations for cars are an afterthought, not the centerpiece.

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Besides, if you drive a car you’re liable to get stuck in epic traffic that makes a drive through Los Angeles seem calming. That’s why Audi didn’t even bother giving us a route to Monaco. They didn’t want us to spend most of our driving impressions noting how the S5 handles stop-and-go traffic for hours at a time.

I suppose I should also mention the other funny stuff I observed while in France. The food was about as I expected. French cuisine is loaded with butter as well as fruits and vegetables I’ve never heard of before or since. One of my meals was a tartare of some kind with a fish I don’t remember plus mangos and some plant I’ve never heard of. I generally like tartare, but this one made me want to throw up.

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My favorite meal was something the resort’s restaurant called a “beef limousine,” which sounds like a great band name. The beef limousine was just a long and wide steak. And when you ask for medium rare, you’re going to get that sucker bleeding. I’m pretty sure “rare” in French terms means the meat is still breathing.

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Also, don’t expect a European hotel to cater to your American self. Buy an international power adapter brick to power your devices or you’re going to be out of luck.

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The people were also heartwarmingly kind. Everyone called me “madame” wherever I went and the politeness was off of the charts. Even the French equivalent of the TSA was super nice. Let’s just say I had an object in my bag that’s great for killing back pain. The French TSA guy was so cute about it, calling it “le massage gun.” Yes sir, that was a le massage gun! Sorry, Canada, I found a place that’s even nicer than you are.

Admittedly, the last time I studied French was back in middle school and I never learned German. But I do know some basic greetings, niceties, and curses in both languages. It seems that French and German folks do like it when an American at least tries to speak the language. The hilarious part is if you say something clear enough, the person you talking to might take off talking in their native tongue, which might make you audibly say oh crap, causing the other person to laugh before they realize you know just a greeting in French.

Amusingly, I also ended up in conversations in both Germany and France about my name. The German lady I talked to reminded me that my name isn’t really that of a car brand while the French guy said my name was beautiful.

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Even the resort looked historic!

I was born with a German name and I was actually excited to meet a lady who had my old name, but with an a at the end of it. I know that’s probably silly, but it was awesome to see that my old name is a real thing!

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Sadly, this is about where my international report ends for now. I was in France for about all of 48 hours. Unfortunately, press events sort of lock you into an ecosystem for the duration of your time there. There isn’t really venturing off on your own. So, my exposure to French car culture was limited, but what I did see was amazing. Later, I did learn that I could have moved my flight home to a later date. Then, I could have gone on a solo adventure outside of the Audi ecosystem. Drat! I’ll have to do that next time.

And there will be a next time. This was so thrilling and so fun that I can’t just let this be where the story ends. I have a Nürburgring to race down, Chinese cars to experience, and icy cold waters to swim in. This is only the beginning.

(Images: Author. The camera was perched on the dashboard with a remote to trigger the shutter. It worked!)

(“Toto” in top graphic: Eric Isselée/stock.adobe.com)

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Dolsh
Dolsh
1 month ago

There are so many different driving experiences that are worth checking out in Europe. Diverse can’t touch it.
The best one is getting a rental in Ireland or the UK. Driving on the wrong side of the car is easier that it seems, but still fun to do. Boosting that experience are the roads in Ireland that are not much wider than a small car that also have 80km/h speed limits. That’s an experience and a half when you encounter farm machinery that is still really huge.
Belgium, The Netherlands and Germany are almost mundane in their normalness. I did have a great week driving a Saab around Belgium though.
I found France to be close to what you described, though I did laugh at the tendency to bump other cars to make parking easier.
Italy is several steps of lunacy beyond the French. There are no laws (it seems), people drive fast, and you’d think that a scooter rider must get killed every 30 seconds, but somehow they don’t. Every car seems like it has hit something. Some, many things. I once thought that a cab ride in Cleveland was the most unhinged cab ride I’ve ever been on… that was recently eclipsed by a cab ride to the airport in the Naples region. Passing on a mountain road with oncoming traffic and no guardrail to speak of? Check! 150km/h on the highway to make up for traffic in the mountains? Check! Driving across lanes and on shoulders without a look around? I’m sure everyone else saw him moving. Wrong way around a roundabout because it’s shorter? Why not?

But the biggest observation from driving in many EU countries that’s actually common? People are actually reasonable about passing lanes on highways. Drive in the drive lane, pass in the pass lane. I just didn’t see nearly as many people camping in the passing lanes. Those that did would get out of the way quick.

Albert Ferrer
Albert Ferrer
1 month ago
Reply to  Dolsh

Italy is God’s race track. It is funny reading about foreigners experiences in Italy or France, to me it just feels normal driving (I am a Spaniard).

Regarding lane discipline… yes but not always. Sometime you have to indicate (or flash high beams for really stubnorn idiots).

GirchyGirchy
GirchyGirchy
1 month ago
Reply to  Albert Ferrer

Agreed, but they pull over after having been flashed.

If they still don’t, you just pass them wherever and whenever you want!

Christian Harberts
Christian Harberts
1 month ago
Reply to  Dolsh

In French interstates (sic) the left and middle are passing lanes, in respect to slower traffic to your right. IF you hog the middle of three lanes, forcing faster vehicles to pass on your left, you definitely risk a fine from the automatic cameras. The rule is drive as far right as you can.

Also, you can get a huge fine for passing someone on the right. Because people know how to pass in general, this is not a problem that often.

Urban Runabout
Urban Runabout
1 month ago

Just wait til you go to Japan, Korea and China.

I stopped reading US car magazines a couple decades ago – but would swing by the newsstand regularly to pick up the latest CAR Magazine from Britain. A nice weighty magazine with a short rundown of every car on the market on the last few pages.

Oh, the things I learned about reading those pages….

Kevin Rhodes
Kevin Rhodes
1 month ago

The different regions of Europe vary WILDY as to the automotive landscape, far more so than different regions of the US do. The cars of choice in Scandinavia are very different from Germany which is very different from France or Italy. The UK being different again. With the local brands in countries that have them having a HUGE advantage.

It’s also VERY easy to tell from the cars chosen that the North is much wealthier than the South and East as a rule. Though France is a special sort of special in that regard – the French are a wealthy bunch, they just tend not to give a shit about cars in general, and they tax the living hell out of nicer ones.

Urban Runabout
Urban Runabout
1 month ago
Reply to  Kevin Rhodes

You’re so right – The Parisians do cars very differently from Milanos, Londoners and Hamburgers….
…just like cars in LA are very different from the vehicles you’ll see in Dallas or Seattle.

Last edited 1 month ago by Urban Runabout
Kevin Rhodes
Kevin Rhodes
1 month ago
Reply to  Urban Runabout

I travel all over the US constantly for work. There is really very little difference between major cities in the US. Sure, you see a few more exotics in LA or Miami, and more brodozers in Dallas, but it’s pretty much the same-old, same-old everywhere. Out west you see more old survivor cars. You see way more European (particularly Swedish) cars in the Northeast. But nothing like Europe where the streetscape in Stockholm (or especially Oslo) is simply *wildly* different than that in Munich which is wildly different from that in Rome which is wildly different from that in Paris.

Albert Ferrer
Albert Ferrer
1 month ago
Reply to  Kevin Rhodes

We may be poor but we drive the crap out of our Ibizas!

I wouldn’t say the car landscape is *that* different between countries. Sure national pride favours some brands here and there but the cars are fairly similar.

The income between countries is far more important than the type of car. There might be more BMWs and Mercs up in the north, but the wealthier people in the south also drive the exact same cars (just that there are less of them). Conversely the notherners with lower wages drive the exact same Seats we do.

Kevin Rhodes
Kevin Rhodes
1 month ago
Reply to  Albert Ferrer

The income differences drive the car differences, of course. Germany is a FAR wealthier place than Italy, and that shows very much. Poor Swedes drive far more old Volvos than old Seats, with the converse being true in Spain.

That sort of thing is simply not the case in the US, it is a FAR more homogenous market from top to bottom with much less regional variation. And of course, rather fewer choices to start with.

755_SoCalRally
755_SoCalRally
1 month ago

One of my favorite driving experiences was in a rented mid-2010’s Renault Clio through the southwest and south of France. Great little car, fun roads, wonderful people, it was all an incredible experience.

Cars? I've owned a few
Cars? I've owned a few
1 month ago

My son and his wife recently honeymooned in Italy and France. They rented a Citroen C5 Aircross hybrid (which they loved) and drove from Nice to Bordeaux. Twenty years before, he, his mother and I drove from Paris to Reims and Giverny in a Peugeot 307 HDI. The Autoroute tolls for the kids (~60 Euro over 800 km) don’t seem to have gone up too much in the intervening years. Neither of us noticed much if any vehicular misbehavior. And yes, having a 6-year-old’s level of French made for incredibly friendly levels of interaction when we went as a family.

In 1988, shooting a telelvision series on Italian wine and cuisine, I drove a diesel Fiat Ducato van with a “5 on the tree” gear shift from Milan over to Verona, down through Modena (we toured the Ferrari factory where we saw F40s being crafted!) and on to the Amalfi coast. Then we drove back up to Rome to fly home. Driving a van the size of a Ford Econoline/Transit in small villages and then idling through the Piazza Giuseppe Mazzini in Rome (which is a big chaotic roundabout with 8 roads feeding into it), with the myriads of small Fiats, scooters etc. swirling around and reluctantly giving way to the much larger vehicle, is something I will never forget nor choose to repeat. I was happy to return the van, unscathed, to the rental company at Fiumicino.
During that trip, I expected to see Ferraris and Lambos blasting past me on the Autostrade, but the cars that were really moving were big black Mercedes, Audis and Volvos (of all things!).

Jakob K's Garage
Jakob K's Garage
1 month ago
Ben
Ben
1 month ago

Later, I did learn that I could have moved my flight home to a later date.

This is a big life hack any time work sends you somewhere cool. I almost always try to arrive early and/or leave late on work trips so I have some time to just enjoy the area. Even better, I can often justify it because if you’re flying in and out on odd days that most business travellers aren’t the airline rates tend to be lower. I just got to spend a weekend in Prague for this reason about a month ago.

A. Barth
A. Barth
1 month ago
Reply to  Ben

This person gets it!

I’m not flying to somewhere nice, going directly to a conference or a meeting, and then immediately flying back. 🙂

I’m going to add a couple days on either side. This does help with the airfare, as you mentioned, and it helps with adjusting to the time change on the front end.

Several years ago I was heading to London for a conference that took place on Tuesday and Wednesday. I flew in Saturday and left the following Saturday – a very nice trip.

Rick Dalghren
Rick Dalghren
1 month ago

M, next time..India and other 2nd and 3rd world countries. Driving on the left or right, sidewalks, medians at whacko speeds. Cars full of sheep, watermelons, apples. Stop lights..maybe & and wrenching on the equivalent of I – 95.

Cerberus
Cerberus
1 month ago
Reply to  Rick Dalghren

Egypt was like that with not using headlights until they were about to hit you, then they’d flash the high beams, presumably to stun their prey before impact.

Cheap Bastard
Cheap Bastard
1 month ago

You might like Tijuana.

Pupmeow
Pupmeow
1 month ago

This was such a charming read. I’m glad you got to have this experience. Hopefully the first of many

Some people like to shit on Americans for not traveling to other countries but America is reeeal big and so are the oceans that surround it!

InvivnI
InvivnI
1 month ago
Reply to  Pupmeow

I have a theory that a lot of Americans don’t travel internationally because each state is different enough to be like its own little country. And the terrain varies so much across the whole place. It makes for some great variety. That and you guys only get like 2 weeks off a year which I just think is unfair.

My country, Australia, is even harder to fly out of – Europe is more than 24 hours away, while the US West coast is like 14 – but that doesn’t stop practically everyone I know having travelled overseas fairly extensively.

Pupmeow
Pupmeow
1 month ago
Reply to  InvivnI

Good points. You can do almost every kind of vacation (tropical resort, mountains, small beach towns, big cities) without needing a passport.

I reeeeally want to visit Australia and surrounding islands but I live in Michigan and it would take half of my vacation time just to get there and back. 😐

Max Headbolts
Max Headbolts
1 month ago

My driving experiences in both Rome and Turin match your Nice experience, though parking was easier in Frascatti, the suburb of Rome I was staying in. Parking in Turin was an absolute nightmare downtown.

The most absurd thing I saw was a Ram 2500 in downtown Turin traffic, it was mostly stock but looked like Bigfoot among all the Euro city cars. I had a Fiat 500 for the trip, and it was the perfect real-world Mario Kart machine for my week there.

Ford_Timelord
Ford_Timelord
1 month ago
Reply to  Max Headbolts

I studied in Turin 10 years ago. Visited all the spots on ‘The Italian Job’ (original) and agree with your observations.
Also. The European market is very locally specific i.e. Renaults in France. Go over the border and my street in Turin once had 9 Fiat Pandas in a row.
I ended up using a bicycle to get to university everyday on the other sided of the historic city. It was chaos but I somehow felt safer cycling there than I do in Australia.

SAABstory
SAABstory
1 month ago

Just remember that DT’s ocean bathing suggestions are just that, suggestions.

Seriously, that was fun. Along with others I’ve never been driving overseas so while it might be old hat for some people I thoroughly enjoyed the whole series.

Ben
Ben
1 month ago
Reply to  SAABstory

Mercedes has a thing about swimming every place she visits. I don’t think that’s coming from DT.

Highland Green Miata
Highland Green Miata
1 month ago

For the most part, trucks as lifestyle vehicles won’t be somewhere along the south coast, more inland where there’s a bit more room and people more likely to have an agricultural reason to have one. And you haven’t experienced life until you try to navigate a French underground parking garage in the middle of a central city. One way tight squeeze always. Although the worst I ever did was an underground lot in Italy that had a 3 maneuver exit that required a diagram on the wall to explain how to exit the garage. First, pull into a space on the left, then reverse at an angle across the aisle to an offset space on the other side, adjust, and pull forward up the narrow ramp to exit.

FG
FG
1 month ago

My Viking-looking British gardener had a lifted RAM. It was from him I learned import rules in Europe were somewhere between cute and nonexistent, but people just kind of tend to self-regulate according to common sense.

Albert Ferrer
Albert Ferrer
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

Never mind the import rules. The cars don’t fit anywhere and they cost a fortune to run (in fuel alone)…

FG
FG
1 month ago
Reply to  Albert Ferrer

And yet Ford insists on selling the Explorer (non-EV) and Bronco in certain European markets. Baffling.

Albert Ferrer
Albert Ferrer
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

Like in here, I have seen one or two Explorer PHEV in the wild and the other day I saw a Bronco in dealer showroom. I am guessing the sales must be in the tens…

FG
FG
1 month ago
Reply to  Albert Ferrer

Doubt it. Not enough of a business case to sell so few of them.

Phuzz
Phuzz
1 month ago
Reply to  Albert Ferrer

I used to walk past an F250 on my way to work (in the UK). It was too wide for the parking space by a few inches, and was approximately the same width as a full sized bus.

Mr E
Mr E
1 month ago

“My favorite meal was something the resort’s restaurant called a “beef limousine,” which sounds like a great band name.”

If you’re a fan of Home Star Runner, make it Beef Limozeen.

Fred Flintstone
Fred Flintstone
1 month ago
Reply to  Mr E

Fun fact: limousin is actually a breed of cattle reared for it’s meat.

FG
FG
1 month ago

I loved the article and your experience, but I was somewhat baffled by your expectation of the cars to be similar to those in the U.S.? Literally the entire autoblogging community has been bitching since time immemorial about all the variety of unobtainium available overseas that isn’t in the States…

As for the FourFour (say that four times in a row), you might be surprised to learn it’s pretty much the twin to the latest-gen Twingo. I rented one in the UK when I decided to blow an inordinate sum on going to the British GP qualifying a couple years back. It was raining. It was horrifying to drive, but so much fun.

Speaking of fun to drive small cars, I saw in one of your photos a gray Pug 208 – the exact double of my most recent European rental. The three-cylinder engine sounds SO good, you forget it barely breaks triple digits when it comes to HP.

Last edited 1 month ago by FG
Cerberus
Cerberus
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

I think maybe she was expecting at least more smaller cars that are common in the US. First time I went, I figured there’d be a lot more things like Corollas and Civics than I saw even when I knew they had nothing like the market share there.

Martin Dollinger
Martin Dollinger
1 month ago

The first generation of Forfours being roughly twenty years old now and having much less of a cult following than the Fortwo, there simply aren‘t that many left. I can‘t remember when I saw the last one here in the Stuttgart area.

FG
FG
1 month ago

I mean, there are Corollas and Civics there – in fact, there are also unobtanium Corollas (like the wagon) and Civics (like the wedge hatch you’ve got pictured all dented up halfway through the article) – but with the variety domestics have, they aren’t as prevalent as they are in the States where they more or less run unopposed together with the Koreans in the C-class segment. The French also tend to be pretty nationalistic in their tastes, so the PSA and Renault crowd tends to overwhelm the rest. Good thing their cars are actually pretty interesting. You’d probably find a bit more commonality with the States in countries without their own brands (or without a huge presence, like Italy with the same C-class) in a particular segment.

Now that you mention it, I don’t know that I’ve seen a ton of the first-gen Forfours in Europe myself recently, but they are getting on a bit in years. I definitely saw my fair share of them as rental cars back about 20 years ago when I first started traveling there. Speaking of the Colt itself – I had it as my rental in Rotterdam for a trip to Cologne back in 2011. Still remember the rolling pin-sized (or so it felt at the time) gear shifter and absolutely glacial acceleration. But hey, at least it was the perfect shade of Jalopnik Brown.

Last edited 1 month ago by FG
FG
FG
1 month ago
Reply to  FG
Albert Ferrer
Albert Ferrer
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

Even in countries without a national brand, Japanese cars don’t rate highly. What they do instead is buy a car from *another* European brand.

I don’t have the figures at hand, but I think Koreans might have even surpassed them…

GirchyGirchy
GirchyGirchy
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

Those goddamn hybrid Corolla wagons! I’d buy one of those in a second if they sold them in the US.

Albert Ferrer
Albert Ferrer
1 month ago

We don’t buy Japanese cars much but like our European cars very much. The only Japanese cars making any decent inroads is the Corolla (hatch and estate, or saloon if you are a taxi driver).

The 3rd Gen ForFour *is* the 3rd Gen Twingo, only stupidly overpriced.

Albert Ferrer
Albert Ferrer
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

A family relative has ForFour Turbo. It is essentially an overpriced piece of shit. It’s only redeeming feature is the tight turning circle. Other than that, avoid.

FG
FG
1 month ago
Reply to  Albert Ferrer

LOL, duly noted.

Manuel Verissimo
Manuel Verissimo
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

The 3 cyl in that 208 is a puretech and is utter dog shit when it comes to reliability. Don’t ever buy one.

FG
FG
1 month ago

Given I live in the U.S., it’s not exactly on the cards, but thanks for the tip.

Manuel Verissimo
Manuel Verissimo
1 month ago
Reply to  FG

I will do my part to sully the name of the puretech. It’s one of those engines with a wet timing belt there was an article about not too long ago.

Toyec
Toyec
1 month ago

Amazing, I loved the article !
Concerning the drivers, I have to say that the region of Nice (well, most of the mediterranean coast actually) is where they are the most reckless. Let’s say that they are “our italians”.
Concerning the Smart, the first two generations don’t have a good reputation because of their reliability, and how easy they are to steal. And as they still were popular because they are relatively expensive (more than a Twingo for the 2 first gens) and practical in dense cities, they were stolen A LOT. Also, we never considered them really french althought they were built here. I guess it’s more because of their english name than their german engineering, because on the opposite the Toyota Yaris is commonly considered french.
Also, for the parkings, yes they are relatively rare and crowded, but in big cities they are not that rare, it’s just that they are mosly invisible because under ground. Counterpoint : they are expensive, and if you come from outside the city it’s basicaly much more economical to just take public transportation to get inside.

Spikedlemon
Spikedlemon
1 month ago

Only those who show less fear on French roads are the urban scooter drivers who charge into road traffic from the midst of throngs of pedestrians and filter up to the front line between “lanes” ahead of all the cars at the lights.

I use “lanes” loosely, as many urban areas seems to be based on however many vehicles wide can fit, and meaning nothing to what’s painted on the road.

Cerberus
Cerberus
1 month ago
Reply to  Spikedlemon

Yeah, you can hear when a light turns green from the scooters. Maybe not as much now with EV versions?

Spikedlemon
Spikedlemon
1 month ago
Reply to  Cerberus

I’m not normally a fan of ‘loud pipes save lives’ but in the case of a French Deliveroo driver, I appreciated hearing the sound of a scooter accelerating off the sidewalk onto the road to give me a chance to not crush the poor soul.

Cerberus
Cerberus
1 month ago
Reply to  Spikedlemon

For me, it meant I either had to run or I was about to be standing still in the middle of the wide road as traffic zoomed past both sides of me until the light changed again.

A. Barth
A. Barth
1 month ago

It seems that French and German folks do like it when an American at least tries to speak the language

This is huge and goes a really long way toward a positive experience. Making the effort demonstrates a genuine interest in the country (rather than expecting everyone to speak English) which is generally appreciated even in touristy areas and even if your skills are crap. I once rendered a statement in Panama with a great accent and such atrocious grammar that the host probably thought I’d hit my head repeatedly.

Years ago I was on a business trip to West Virginia, of all places. As I was checking out of the hotel, I overheard a man who was visiting from Germany speaking with two older American ladies who spoke German very well.

Before heading out, I apologized for the intrusion, introduced myself to the man, and made small talk (alle auf Deutsch) for a few minutes. The mildly amusing conclusion is that somewhere in Germany is a man who probably thinks WV is full of German speakers.

Ben Siegel
Ben Siegel
1 month ago
Reply to  A. Barth

I know how to say “Thank you” and “Cheers” in the language of every country I’ve ever visited. Even making the effort goes a long way to show that you’re not an “ugly American” stereotype traveler demanding that folks speak English, etc.

Best reaction? Greece! The Greeks (only 4M population, only an additional 4M Greek-speakers globally) really appreciated my (probably very poor) attempt to say thank you in Greek.

Clam Bert
Clam Bert
1 month ago

ah! as an american ex-pat this is what i see every day and i love it so much! i am glad you made it. every one of your photos has such a taste my daily life.

just FYI, french people pay about 3000€ for driving school, then they have 3 chances to pass the tests and the tests are no joke. if they fail those 3 chances, they have to pay an exhorbitant amount to try again. i tell people visiting france, that the french people are probably much better drivers than you are, but they just don’t care. resistance to authority is in their blood and soul, their driving reflects that. 😀

BBecker
BBecker
1 month ago
Reply to  Clam Bert

I don’t see that a country with an army of bureaucrats and endless rules about everything (such as even absurdly listing what items were allowed or not allowed to be purchased in the same stores during COVID) really demonstrates much “resistance to authority” at all.

Clam Bert
Clam Bert
1 month ago
Reply to  BBecker

having a ton of rules and regulations and actually following them and respecting them are two completely different things… 😉

Lizardman in a human suit
Lizardman in a human suit
1 month ago
Reply to  Clam Bert

Maybe the bureaucrats make up new rules so folks there have the pleasure of breaking new rules!

Christian Harberts
Christian Harberts
1 month ago
Reply to  Clam Bert

Spot on…

Fun fact, a /few/ US states have agreements with the French driving authorities, and therefore you can apply for a French license without actually having to spend 3000€ for driving school (with btw is cheap, compared to my neighborhood just outside of Paris).

Of course, North Carolina is not on this list (possibly South Carolina though?) so when I arrived in France in 1994 I had the honor, priviledge and pleasure of passing my full French drivers permit. And you know what? From then on, whenever I drove back in the US, I was appalled how situationally unaware the majority of American drivers were (and still are).

Clam Bert
Clam Bert
1 month ago

situationally aware! i could not call it defensive driving, but french drivers avoiding collisions with other french drivers! 😀

Christian Harberts
Christian Harberts
1 month ago
Reply to  Clam Bert

Mais that sounds exactly like defensive driving, non ?

I remember my my driver-ed teacher in high school (and even more, his abominable dirt-colored Dodge Aspen – #dryheaves) and it was all about defensive driving.

And that has greatly contributed (in addition to actually taking the French test) to completely staying out of trouble all these years in French traffic, mostly in Paris. I’m of Germanic stock – I generally don’t get riled when I drive.

I do however use contact to determine the physical limits of the parking space. Strangely, this appears to be somewhat frowned upon when I do this State-side…

Manwich Sandwich
Manwich Sandwich
1 month ago

Yeah the parking situation in a lot of places in the EU makes going places by bicycle, bus or train look way more appealing. Fuel prices and other car costs over there also help with that too.

Ben Siegel
Ben Siegel
1 month ago

All of your travel write ups have been great. I’ve done both Europe and Asia for business and was on that 787 ORD to FRA back in August. One note about driving in the EU, I assume it’s similar with both France and Germany – the further south you get, the more chaos. Nice is probably close to Italian levels of city chaos. Definitely was true in Italy too – highways in northern Italy? not different than US/German highways. Cities as you get further south? Chaos all around.

Copenhagen and Sweden? Order all around.

Baja_Engineer
Baja_Engineer
1 month ago
Reply to  Ben Siegel

true that. Italy is driving chaos. The most hilarious thing I saw were all those tiny cars nose-in parked between parallel parked cars (in a curb clearly designed for parallel parking).

Ben Siegel
Ben Siegel
1 month ago
Reply to  Baja_Engineer

Drove Venice – Florence, highways were easy. Dropping the rental car in Florence was an Event.

Day trip out of Rome we picked up a rental at Termini to get out to the highway. We were on a 6 lane road approaching a T. 3 lanes with left arrows, 3 with right arrows. A concrete bollard in the middle with the traffic light. I needed to turn left, then right shortly after so I was in lane 3 of 6. As the light turned green 5 lanes of traffic went to turn left, including 2 that drove around the concrete bollard.

Kevin Rhodes
Kevin Rhodes
1 month ago
Reply to  Ben Siegel

I’ve driven all over Europe, from Scandinavia to southern Italy and all over the former Communist block. Germany is driving nirvana. The Germans know what they are doing, and they follow the rules to a fault. If you see someone driving like an asshat in Germany, the car is from the former Eastern block, without fail.

The Scandinavians are a close second, but without the fun of the Autobahn. The French are “OK”, but they have no fucks to give and “rubing’s racing” there, as evidenced by nearly every car being banged up. Paris being a special sort of driving hell when you are driving your brand-new BMW M235i. I cheerfully drove that car all over Rome, I parked it at our hotel in Paris and took Le Metro…

Chaos, yet the very best drivers, IMHO, is Italy – and absolutely the more south you go, the more chaotic it gets. Yet you rarely see a banged up car in Italy – they manage to drive with a level of insanity that has to be experienced to be believed, yet they very rarely hit anything. The former Commie Countries manage to be about as insane at the Italians with the no fucks to give like the French, and crashed cars are EVERYWHERE – you have been warned. Though I still infinitely prefer driving in Budapest to driving in Paris.

Cheap Bastard
Cheap Bastard
1 month ago
Reply to  Kevin Rhodes

“The former Commie Countries manage to be about as insane at the Italians with the no fucks to give like the French, and crashed cars are EVERYWHERE – you have been warned.”

Sounds like Tijuana.

Baja_Engineer
Baja_Engineer
1 month ago
Reply to  Cheap Bastard

lived there for 4 years, I can confirm

Manuel Verissimo
Manuel Verissimo
1 month ago
Reply to  Ben Siegel

The exception for France being Paris. It’s quite North but driving is horrendous!

Jmfecon
Jmfecon
1 month ago

I wonder in which parallel universe Mercedes travelled to find french people nice. Maybe people from southern France are.

Or I was always unlucky to meet rude people from there. Maybe they were unhapppy because they were not in France.

Or Mercedes was lacking some sobriety due too much Champagne from the first class…

Baja_Engineer
Baja_Engineer
1 month ago
Reply to  Jmfecon

true, I’ve talked about this too, but then again I’ve only been to Paris.
That’s when people tell me only Parisians are rude.
OTOH, I’ve found Italians to be much more inviting and gentle, regardless of province

Spikedlemon
Spikedlemon
1 month ago
Reply to  Jmfecon

It’s a mix of people everywhere. I used to think Germans were standoffish, until I spend considerable time there, and I found how warm and welcoming people were in the former East Germany (contrasting starkly with Bavaria, mind you)

Kevin Rhodes
Kevin Rhodes
1 month ago
Reply to  Spikedlemon

Bavarians are the “fun” West Germans… Munich is a MUCH friendlier place than Stuttgart, as an example. But in general, a German with a sense of humor is from Austria.. And I swear that Swiss Germans have even less sense of humor than German-Germans. Though Swiss-Italians are fun, with the French speakers sort of in-between.

I have to admit, other than Berlin (which doesn’t really count) I haven’t spent any time in the former East Germany.

Spikedlemon
Spikedlemon
1 month ago
Reply to  Kevin Rhodes

Munich might be nice to your face. East Germany, however, wants to take you out drinking, eating, sightseeing, complaining, whatever… Berlin feels like it’s half-English-speaking, so I’m not sure it really counts.

And totally I agree with the Austrians.

Kevin Rhodes
Kevin Rhodes
1 month ago
Reply to  Spikedlemon

Bavarians aren’t that fun – they are just more fun than other Germans in my experience. A dour bunch, as a rule.

Interesting that the East is more lively, I certainly would not have expected that. Though the former commie block folks are certainly a good time universally, so there is that. Maybe it’s getting out from under oppression that does it?

Kevin Rhodes
Kevin Rhodes
1 month ago
Reply to  Jmfecon

In France there is Paris, and there is the rest of the country. Outside of Paris, the French are lovely.

Jmfecon
Jmfecon
1 month ago
Reply to  Kevin Rhodes

Reminds me Argentina, everybody outside Buenos Aires are just wonderful.

GirchyGirchy
GirchyGirchy
1 month ago
Reply to  Jmfecon

If you find French people rude, it’s you.

My wife’s been to Paris seven times, myself three, and we’ve been elsewhere in the country. We’ve met far fewer assholes than we have here in the US. Be friendly, say “bonjour!” lightly as you walk in, and no problems, ever.

Geoff Buchholz
Geoff Buchholz
1 month ago
Reply to  Jmfecon

My husband and I were just in France in the spring for our honeymoon, with stays in Paris, Marseille and suburban Nice … and with very few exceptions, the locals with whom we interacted in all three places were polite. Nice, even. As others have commented, even a little knowledge of French pleasantries went a long way.

And I can confirm the treachery of roads around Nice. We rented a Citroen C3 Aircross for our stay, and we curbed a tire trying to dodge an energetically-driven Audi coming at us on a narrow road. Mercifully, the low-tire-pressure warning didn’t come on until we were on our way to return the car (at 7am, before the desk opened), so we backed it into a space, chucked the keys into the slot, and bid it adieu.

Max.B
Max.B
1 month ago

Thank you Mercedes for this refreshing article !

As a French expatriate living in the USA, I am amused to see that I had the exact same impression when I crossed the Atlantic.
I initially found the average Texas driver to be absolutely reckless, constantly speeding, passing from the right and regularly bombing past red traffic lights, with a phone in one hand and some junk flying off their pick-up truck bed.

Now I understand that they are not worse (or better) drivers, they are just dealing with different cars and road conditions.

Texas also is not representative of the USA though, and so is Nice.
Southern mountain driving on crowded and tiny roads takes some getting used to, even for the French tourists…

Last edited 1 month ago by Max.B
Bram Oude Elberink
Bram Oude Elberink
1 month ago

Sorry that you had to discover we trash the shit out of the little Smarts, they are perfect for city racing. I hope that you return to Europe more often, I think you would adapt to the driving quite quickly. Driving differs a lot in different countries; up north in Norway and Sweden they drive very gently and calm. The more south you go, the more passionate the driving becomes.
Personally I love to drive in France, and I get used to their fluent go-with-the-flow way of driving real quick. The problems come when I return to the Netherlands and still use the French way of driving in Dutch traffic; I get a lot of angry faces, finger swearing and honking 🙂

Last edited 1 month ago by Bram Oude Elberink
4jim
4jim
1 month ago

So glad you had those experiences! Car people should drive in other countries just for the exexperience.
I drove a rental opal (manual transmission in a rental) around Florence and Pisa and the part that made me the most nervous was the constant barrage of scooters darting into oncoming traffic to pass people. I was worried I would hit one head-on.

10001010
10001010
1 month ago

The addition of Toto in the topshot is a nice touch 😉

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