Good morning, and welcome back to Shitbox Showdown! On today’s menu are two Ford Escorts that both need to be, um, escorted from their current locations by a tow truck. The good news is they’re both cheap enough to be worth a little work. Which one is a better fixer-upper opportunity will be up to you.
We ended last week’s weirdness with a four-way battle, and it was clear from the comments that the Studebaker was going to cruise to an easy win. Old trucks, man. You just can’t beat ’em.
But I think I’d pick the Fiero, if I had my choice. I already have an old truck, which, while it isn’t as cool as that Studebaker, has won me over time and time again. I have never, however, owned a Pontiac Fiero, as much as I’ve always admired them, unless you count the 1/25 scale MPC model kit on my shelf.
This week, to counteract the bizarre cars from last week, I’m picking more ordinary cars, but keeping the asking prices down. This, of course, means that some of them will be broken to some degree or other. Such is the case with today’s pair of low-mileage Ford Escorts: one won’t go, and the other won’t stop. But both should be relatively easy fixes. Let’s check them out.
1986 Ford Escort LX – $1,200
Engine/drivetrain: 1.9-liter overhead cam inline 4, three-speed automatic, FWD
Location: Coryton, TN
Odometer reading: 51,000 miles
Operational status: Cranks over but won’t start; seller suspects ignition problem
Ford kept the Escort from us here in America for two very cool rear-wheel-drive generations before we finally got this watered-down version in 1981. It looks a lot like the European third-generation Escort, but it shares almost no parts except the basic engine design – Ford’s CVH four-cylinder. Ford offered two sizes of this engine in the American Escort: 1.6 and 1.9 liters. The 1.6 was long gone by the time this 1989 model was built; it never was enough oomph for the Escort, especially with an automatic transmission.
Its odometer reads a scant 51,000 miles, though there’s no way of knowing whether or not it has rolled over. I tend to doubt it; it looks too clean for 151,000 miles. The seller says it ran and drove well until recently, but now it won’t start, due to a lack of spark. Instead of digging into the problem, they’re unloading it cheap. Yes – $1,200 for a non-starting but otherwise clean car is cheap these days.
And it really is clean; I don’t think anyone has ever sat in the back seat. That’s typical of a commuter-type car like this, though – only the driver’s seat ever really gets used. I’ve even had small four-door cars where the rear door hinges were nearly seized and opened only reluctantly.
The photos in the ad are pretty terrible, but from what I can see, it’s clean outside as well. These old Escorts had a lot of faults, but they never did seem to rust too badly. And it shouldn’t take much to get it running again; a quick peek at RockAuto shows that you could throw parts at the ignition system until something works, and not spend more than a couple hundred bucks.
1995 Ford Escort LX Wagon – $1,300
Engine/drivetrain: 1.9-liter overhead cam inline 4, four-speed automatic, FWD
Location: Boradview Heights, OH
Odometer reading: 55,000 miles
Operational status: Runs, but has no rear brakes
Fast-forward a few years, and our Escort had drifted even further from the European model. Starting in 1991, the Escort was based on Mazda’s BG platform, but the CVH engine remained. It gained sequential multi-port fuel injection, and drove the front wheels through a Mazda four-speed automatic instead of the old Ford ATX three-speeder.
These cars were not exciting to drive, but damn, did they get good mileage. I had a ’93 Escort hatchback with the CVH and an automatic for a couple of years, and it hit damn near 40 MPG on highway trips. I’ve heard the five-speed manual version did even better. This one runs great, according to the seller, and would be roadworthy, if not for a leaking brake line to the rear.
It’s a little banged up here and there, but considering the price, who cares? And again, it’s not a rust-prone car, unlike its Mazda-badged platform-mates. This is the body style you want, too; my hatchback could hold a lot of stuff, but these wagons were gigantic inside.
The biggest drawback to this era of Escort is those damned motorized seat belts. Every single one of them had ’em, even the 1995-96 models which came with a driver’s side airbag. You get used to them after a while, kind of, but they never stop being annoying.
Yes, you could just spend a little more and get a car that’s ready to go. And tomorrow, I’ll show you a couple. But for today, you have to choose: Replace some cheap ignition parts, or replace a blown brake line and bleed the system?
(Image credits: Facebook Marketplace sellers)
“My” first car was an 89 EscortGT with the “high output” 115?HP engine, 5MT. It was a joy and a good highschool car, since I had quite a commute on days that I drove with the program I was in. I know a lot of it is nostalgia, but I’d like to have another one as a silly, slow, but joyful “beater” hatchback. I think all of them have rusted away to nothing in the Midwest.
95 for sure. i had a fellow IBMer that swore by that generation, He’d buy one for next to nothing, fix whatever minor thing was wrong, drive it until the trans shit the bed, repeat. he drove about 60-70k a year.. and get about a year or two out of a $300 escort. and ive never seen an 80s escort that wasn’t a heaping pile of misery for its owner.
I had a 95 Escort for years, the CVH is still a paint shaker but the Mazda platform made it a decent car
Constant Vibration and Harshness! My wife has been driving a ’95 Escort as a work car for many years. It’s been a surprisingly decent car. Our daughter wishes it would just die already.
Yeah the Mazda engines transform the car. My mom had a 91 Protégé with the 16V and it was awesome
I voted for the ’95 just because of its looks. Or rather, the looks of the ’86.
Why was it such an uglyfying departure from the crisp, clean lines of the European one?
Those early Escorts were straight garbage.
I had a Escort wagon a few years around 02-04 or so. Non-interference head so when the timing belt broke in Louisville on the way to my sister-in-law’s wedding, it was a $250 fix 😀
No brainer here. Nike all day long.
Are those both the semi-hemi 1.9? My brother’s ’89 GT was magic to drive. I fell in love with that motor.
First gen Escorts were miserable POS’s. Also, I’m liking the Aerostar and Caravan in the background. 😮
Oh no no no no NO no no no NOOOOO no no no no…..OK, wagon.
This is going to be one of the most lopsided showdowns yet!
Easy choice here. Brake lines aren’t that hard, and the ’95 wagon is SOOOOO much better!
Wagon! Wagon! Wagon! Wagon! Wagon! Wagon!
HOW MANY TIMES DOES IT HAVE TO BE SAID…wagons are ALWAYS the right choice.
American 80’s Escorts SUUUUUUUUUUCK. So hard. My Mom had one when I was a kid and it was easily the worst of the used cars we ever had. Just a POS in every way you could imagine. Replace the cheap ignition parts and congrats, you now own a very terrible car that might run for a short period of time.
90’s Escort = good. Rear brake work and you’ve got a decent cheap car. And a wagon!
Clearly, the ’95 is the way to go – a straightforward fix to have a better car for basically the same amount of money. And when was the last time you saw an Escort equipped with power windows and door locks? Original buyer was obviously a high-roller. The ’86 buyer, not so much as it’s a low-level L (not an LX), but they did spring for the Instrumentation Group, which is…something.
I’d take the ’86 Escort because it does not have motorized seatbelts.
Tell me you have never owned an ’80s Escort without telling me you have never owned an ’80s Escort. I will deal with the seatbelts all day long compared to the everything wrong with the 86.
I’m willing to bet money that the rear brake issue with the wagon is due to a line rusting out, which makes me wonder what else under there is seized up and rusted out.
I’ll still take it over the ’86, though. 🙂
Wagon for the win. Those 80s Escorts, man. Timing belts, fun interference engines, and valve/ valve seats that would detach and kill the engine, even at lower mileage. I’d avoid the CVH 1.6/1.9 unless you like to tear down your engine frequently or have a spare at the ready. I worked at a Ford dealer in the 80s. We replaced a crap ton of short blocks and reman heads for these duds.
CVH are non-interference. They do love to eat their valve seats though.
you’re correct – the 1.9L CVH is non-interference. The early 1.6 (81-83) is an interference engine. I should have specified. As you said, they still didn’t address the valve seats, which could drop out anytime.
Even boosting the displacement didn’t do much for these things, sad to say. But for the time, they (mostly) did serve as a useful appliance. Build quality was optional, but there were worse alternatives available from other makers as well.
Aside from the horrendous shake at idle, I rather liked the 2.0 SPI in my ’99 wagon. It was reasonably peppy and got 30 mpg all day going 80 on the highway with the air on. But man it could shake cocktails sitting in drive at a stop light with my foot on the brake.
Yep, I remember three friends and family members that all had the Cylinder head crack on these P.O.S. engines!
The 1986 probably needs a new TFI module. I had an 83, mom had an 84. Both of them blew that piece out around 45,000 miles. Such gigantic POS these cars were.
We had a ’93 Wagon in Cayman green and it was a great car that would cruise, allegedly, at 85mph all day on I-75. I had an ’85 Lynx, by comparison, with the 1.6L and an automatic and it was the definition of “hoary”.
The ’95 FTW in this one.
1995 Ford Escort is an easy pick. The 1991-1996 Escorts are a Mazda-based design. They have some minor flaws, but they’re cheap to fix. On the whole, they are solid and durable cars and are good buys if they’re not rusted out.
The pre-1991 Escorts are complete crap by comparison.
I had a ’99 Escort wagon and it was a surprisingly decent car. This one is genuinely tempting for what’s probably a cheap fix on the rear brakes.
i’ll take the third option – Ride the Bus.
Kinda interesting how last week’s 4-way had the Stude running away with it and nearly exactly even distribution of votes among the rest.
Neither of these are particularly appealing as transportation appliances. The ’86 is old enough that it is interesting, though. It is not a cool classic car by any means, but preserved ordinary cars be be entertaining in their own way. The ’95 still feels like a cheap, ordinary used car. I’ll take old and interesting over cheap and ordinary.
I agree. The ’95 is fine, but I’d probably buy a different car for just “fine”. The ’86 has some character and that interior is immaculate!
Wagon vs. anything on this site is “80’s wrestling match between Hulk Hogan and anonymous guy in red shorts”.