Home » Jason Continues To Be The Autopian Most Likely To Get Arrested – Tales From The Slack

Jason Continues To Be The Autopian Most Likely To Get Arrested – Tales From The Slack

Slack Tales Jason Preison
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CSRoad
CSRoad
1 hour ago

Make new stickers, that’s graphics, get Torch involved.
Swap IGX for JFK, good old Horace Williams, it might break even for $45.
Maybe it is not a Taxi, it’s a mobile venue for tail light discussion and a non-profit.

There is this to whom it may concern envelope.
It is an undercover vehicle part of an operation that can’t be discussed at this time. The Torchinski fellow is deeply involved, do not apprehend.

Scott
Scott
1 hour ago

WTF actually is “handling salmon in a suspicious way?” Does that mean you’re obviously enjoying it too much? If so, I’m guilty of that at least a couple times a month.

Ah, I see (thanks for the wiki link) that it means being in possession of salmon that comes from a suspicious (i.e.: perhaps illegal) source. Like 98% of the salmon I’ve ever consumed comes from the grocery store (Trader Joe’s, etc…) so that’s probably not an issue.

Still, the over-the-hill-revolutionary in me want to scream ‘FUCK THE SALMON POLICE” even though I’m actually 100% in favor of sustainable fishery policy.

1978fiatspyderfan
1978fiatspyderfan
1 hour ago
Reply to  Scott

Pretty sure either sex with or failing to store it at proper temperature. I put sex first for a reason

A. Barth
A. Barth
3 hours ago

in many ways, Jason always lives his life a little bit outside the law

I thought he lived it a quarter-mile at a time. Maybe that was someone else.

1978fiatspyderfan
1978fiatspyderfan
1 hour ago
Reply to  A. Barth

But with the changali a quarter mile is like 3 months.

Toecutter
Toecutter
3 hours ago

Jason always lives his life a little bit outside the law.

I think we all do, it’s just that the vast majority will never admit it, and not always without good reason.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6611240-three-felonies-a-day

This is why it’s so hard to copy Jason. He doesn’t think like regular people. He doesn’t do what regular people do.

Regular people are boring. That has its pluses and minuses.

every Torchinsky child has to fetch their parents from jail at least one time.

I’m no stranger to this with regard to my own parents…

Glad Torch is still alive and kicking and creating chaos! I look forward to reading about the taxi cab adventures.

Root
Root
3 hours ago

Is there anything in the local area with the initials JFK? Like maybe he opens a store called “Jason’s Fascinating Knickknacks”? Jason could make a lot of cash driving people there and try to sell overpriced cruft. Gotta keep up the hustle in this economy!

1978fiatspyderfan
1978fiatspyderfan
1 hour ago
Reply to  Root

Screw it just don’t stop or show up then they think you are a real cab company.

Taco Shackleford
Taco Shackleford
3 hours ago

It seems about time for a bail fund to be set up. Use the next membership drive to fund Jason’s future release.

Root
Root
3 hours ago

The fact that he had the CALL 911 lights on and nobody did absolutely does not surprise me.

MikeInTheWoods
MikeInTheWoods
3 hours ago

It would be worth it to pay $45 and get to drive around with Jason for a while. Even if we ended up in a jail cell.

1978fiatspyderfan
1978fiatspyderfan
1 hour ago
Reply to  MikeInTheWoods

I think Jason would end up in jail and I wonder if he would think riding around with you was worth it?

Crank Shaft
Crank Shaft
3 hours ago

If you hire me, I promise to get arrested within 48 hours.

Mike Harrell
Mike Harrell
2 hours ago
Reply to  Crank Shaft

Are you extending this offer just to The Autopian or in general?

Crank Shaft
Crank Shaft
45 minutes ago
Reply to  Mike Harrell

For everything except cocaine mule because I’m stealing it before I get caught.

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