Hi guys! It’s your friendly neighborhood infiltrator writing to you from LA! The weather has been nice compared to my home back in Michigan, and there was so much to do and see. Though of all the surprises at the L.A. Auto Show, never did I think I would get to shoot tequila with The Autopian’s own Stephen Walter Gossin. And yes, his jawline is somehow even better in person.
[Ed note: For the first time ever, The Autopian hosted members as “infiltrators” at the LA Auto Show to help us cover the show. Also, honestly, just to have fun hanging out with. It was great to see the show through their fresh eyes and, of course, what better co-pilot and navigator than the charming and vibrant Stephen Walter Gossin.
The auto show was a little light on automakers this year, as all are, but props to the show for filling the spaces. One of the best ways they did it? Kevin Hart, who not only showed off his car collection (sorry, Kar Kollection) but also incorporated his many, many, many side hustles. This included both some sort of vitamin smoothie drink that I didn’t taste and his tequila brand, which had some yummy cocktails to enjoy during press days. You can’t go wrong liquoring up car journalists, as our own infiltrators learned.
Thanks to the LA Auto Show and Galpin for helping put this together. Ok, back to reader/member/bud Jonathan. If you want to have fun like this, become a member.- MH]
Anywho, on to the alcohol! Stephen and I wandered over to the Kevin Hart Kollection room, which has an impressive array of classic muscle and under-the-radar ’80s pieces, all retro-moded in various ways. Most interesting to me was the 1960s Mustang coupe with what looked like an S197 automatic transmission. Would have loved to peek under the hood to see what else was done.
Also in the room was a protein smoothie stand and tequila! Stephen and I both tried the chocolate smoothie, made with banana and unsweetened almond milk. From there, we went to the tequila bar.
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We each did a shot of Kevin Hart’s Gran Coramino Tequila. Admittedly, I’m not a big tequila guy, usually bourbon or vodka are my hard poisons of choice. But with this, I might be converted.
It was very smooth going down, with a mild but pleasant taste, and nothing lingering afterward. This was followed up by a “Corner Office.” Something wonderful with tequila, infused with jalpanas. I also don’t do jalapeños, but this just added an ever-so-mild heat to the concoction. If someone said it was just a margarita, I would have never known there was the dangerous (to my mild midwestern palate) pepper.
Overall, it was a wonderful drink experience, with even better company! Ope, I better run now so I don’t miss my studio tour but I hope to talk to you all again very soon!
[Ed Note: Here are a few other impressions of Kevin Hart’s Tequila – MH]
GrippyCaballeros: “Kevin Hart had sponsorship deals all over the show. Fabletics, tequila, smoothies. You know what he didn’t sponsor? Wheelbarrow of shrimp. This is how Webster’s defines irony…
But Kevin Hart’s tequila tastes like losing $100 on the Bills.”
HowInTheNameOfZues: “I’m not sure I experienced The World of Kevin Hart, but I enjoyed The Cars and Finger Foods of Kevin Hart”
Vanagons4Eva:
“So many carmakers missing! If only Mercedes/BMW/Audi/Mazda/Lincoln/most of Acura had the same kind of money that Kevin Hart has!”
Photo: The Autopian, Gran Coramino
I once drank 5 fingers of Two Fingers tequila on an empty stomach 45 years ago.
The next 18 hours was insane. Not gonna do that again. Wouldn’t be prudent.
Apologies to the 2K people who lived in the apartment complex. And to the Pasadena Texas Police Dept. (apparently they had gun laws in Texas as far back as that.)
And to that fine babe in 14B. If had known you were married, well then I still may have gone through with it. Gracias.
And that was the night I first saw God. on Hwy 45 South in a 308 with Christy Brinkley in the passengers seat.
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
Can’t wait for the miniseries adaptation!
My joke would’ve made more sense if I’d taken a picture of the sign outside the bar that said EXPERIENCE THE WORLD OF KEVIN HART. If you infiltrate the next auto show, take pictures of everything. Especially the extremely earnest signs making weird promises.
Funny thing is…it wasn’t really needed. Given how this sort of stuff tends to look, esp. when celebrities of any sort are involved in pitching something other than their normal work, I naturally figured there was some of gigantic, dramatically-posed sign displayed.
Did anyone eat it on the Motocompo test race? I know the normies got carpet under the track but I heard press day was concrete
It was concrete on Thursday. I did two laps and fellow infiltrator HowintheNameofZeus said he was able to do about a dozen. It was a little slippery but not too bad. It was fun and easy to “gun it” without too much effort. However, one of my biggest takeaways was that you could feel bumps on the Motocompo due to its lack of suspension…and that was on almost glass-smooth concrete. I’d be worried about what could happen to your posterior if you had to drive it a few miles on a street or sidewalk.
I slid the rear wheel out around a turn after gaining too much confidence on about the 8th lap. But the motocompacto is so skinny that you’d be crazy to keep your feet on the pegs around turns, so I just put my foot down and kept going.
Great post, and I too enjoy my SN95, no matter what anyone says!
But am I the first to observe SWG seems attired like he might be pitching Auntie Autopia’s fabulous anti-friction additive back at the booth?
“Yes folks, it makes your car run…more autopian. Why, it’s in this nifty yellow and green roadster right now! Please don’t crowd, there’s plenty for everyone at our low low price!”
SWG’s wooden bowtie was truly an inspired choice and I loved it.
Actually that’s a pretty solid guess! I was shooting for “The Autopian meets Ice Cream Parlor” as a stylistic choice to mix up the weird at the show.
What do the site and an ice cream parlor have in common? Not sure yet, but we’ll get there eventually.
Thanks Jack!
The jokes seemingly write themselves. “The chocolate sauce is Jaguar viscosity” “It’s not rust, it’s toffee.”
And of course…rocky road.
I was shooting for “The Autopian meets Ice Cream Parlor” as a stylistic choice to mix up the weird at the show.
So handing out warm shrimpsicles from a creepy white van?
YOUR MOTHER WAS A HAMSTER AND YOUR FATHER SMELT OF ELDERBERRY SMOOTHIES!
Seeing “TEQUILA!” makes me think of Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure.
Same, also “The Alamo”
I wonder if they saw the basement?
Kevin Hart has officially reached my limit for an overexposed celebrity. Putting his name on fancy Jose Cuervo (according to Reddit’s r/tequila snobs) and the constant sports betting app commercials have maxed me out.
If this is simply badge-engineered Cuervo in a fancy bottle, I’d be quite disappointed trying it out. I’ll have to read up on that. Chinaco Anejo was the best tequila I’ve ever tried.
Other than from this article, I had no idea who Kevin Hart is. But I know now there is tequila with his name on it.
One of the comments from r/tequila..
“Yet another contract distillate made using industrial manufacturing methods out of the Cuervo distillery that uses a famous person’s brand to push a mediocre product with a grossly high price tag.”
Yeah, that price is crack pipe then.
It’s pretty shocking that you have no idea who Kevin Hart is considering he probably has the lowest CdA for an actor this side of Peter Dinklage. 🙂
All you gotta do is be old. Never heard of him before this piece,
For those of us of a certain age, he knocked it out of the park a few years ago when Jimmy Kimmel revisited a few of Norman Lear’s classic sitcoms, putting on live versions of famous episodes.
In a bizarre but it actually worked choice, Hart played Arnold on a Diff’rent Strokes episode. He managed to channel Gary Coleman amazingly well, and you even forgot a guy in his 40s was playing a 10 year old.
Highlight was when John Lithgow’s Mr. Drummond picked him up and carried him…for an old man, he’s apparently quite strong.
Tequila has been my favorite liquor since I was a teenager. It is flavorful enough to enjoy straight without mixing it with anything. I sipped on a bottle of inexpensive Espolon Anejo over the last weekend while working on my bikes.
I want to give this Gran Coramino a try. The price looks reasonable, although a bit expensive for my tastes. I’ve seen tequilas triple the price per oz and up.
The smoothie was pretty tasty, the tequila was on-point (in this ex-bartenders’ opinion) and the cars at that exhibit were stunning. The best part was having John there with me, riding shotgun.
Awesome dude with pure Autopian-style.
Tequila reminds me that the rear windows in VW Beetles do not roll down
I’d ask how those thoughts are related, but I already kind of know.
As far as automotive portmanteaus go, Gran Coramino is pretty damn good.