You know what I never liked? I mean, other than Circus Peanuts and when the lobsters in the tank at the grocery store lure you close and then seize your genitals in a cruel pinch, having fooled you with a slit rubber band that wasn’t really restricting their claw, as they lock their weird little black eye nubbins with your eyes and they know they have you beat. Other than that, what I never liked are stupid, hacky lists of “worst cars.” I hate these dumb, lazy lists. They almost always re-hash the same cars, most of which don’t even deserve to be on those lists, anyway. So what I’d like to do today is to take what seem to be the ten cars that most commonly appear on the list, give each of them a little defense, and then let’s vote to see which one deserves to be on those lists the least. The best worst car, if you will. And, oh, you will.
First, I suppose we need our list. I’ve been reading over as many of these dumbass worst car posts as I’ve been able to stomach, and I think the ten most common recurring characters are the following cars: Yugo, Edsel, Pontiac Aztek, Ford Pinto, Chevrolet Corvair, AMC Gremlin, Reliant Robin, Chevrolet Vega, Austin Allegro, and the Trabant. In my loud, messy opinion, I don’t think any of these cars deserve the amount of scorn they tend to get, but for now, we’re just going to pick one. We’re going to pick the one that deserves to be on these dumb lists the least, and from there we’ll contact our crack team of D.C. lobbyists to push through legislation to ensure this sort of injustice never happens again to whatever car comes out the winner. So let’s get to it.
Yugo
As you may guess, as a Yugo owner myself, I have never felt the Yugo earned all the derision it gets as an almost guaranteed member of these worst car lists. I even made a whole video about it, as you can see right above, when I worked for the Old Site. Here’s the thing about the Yugo: it’s fine. It’s not even a particularly unusual or radical design; it’s a FWD, transverse-engined hatchback that follows the template of so very many other cars of its era. Tons of them have been sold all over Eastern Europe especially, and they’ve proven to be useful workhorses for decades.
Sure, the build quality wasn’t great, but remember, these things were dirt cheap. Under $4,000 for a new one when they came out! They made Hyundai Excels look like the kind of lavish expenditure you’d expect from a sultan. Nobody paid any money to fix or maintain these things because why would they? You could buy distressed designer jeans for more than a new Yugo, even back in the day, so who would put money into them?
The truth is, the cars worked. They were decent transportation and did the job they were designed to do, cheaply. Dirty deeds of transportation, done dirt cheap. I respect that.
Edsel
For a very long time, the name “Edsel” was synonymous with automotive failure, perhaps even failure in general. And, sure, the Edsel was sort of a flop for Ford, but was the car really all that bad? No. It just wasn’t. The Edsel was a failure of marketing over-hype and misreading of markets more than anything else. It just wasn’t appreciatively worse than anything else being built by the Big Three in the late 1950s.
Sure, some people thought that the horse collar grille resembled a vulva, a bit, but it’s not like 1957 American car styling was any less ridiculous than what the Edsel was.
I mean, come on, look at this Chrysler. It looks like those two lovers are seconds away from making out over the carcass of a beached whale. The Edsel just got a bad rap, and never shook it. That’s it.
Pontiac Aztek
You know what the Aztek’s biggest crime was? It was ahead of its time. Okay, it was kinda ugly, too, but it’s not that ugly. Is an Infiniti QX really so much prettier? No, it isn’t. It also looks like some kind of cybernetic warthog, and yet it doesn’t show up on these lists anywhere remotely as close as the Aztek, which is MVP of these bullshit things. That’s because the QX had the good sense to start to exist in an era when we all somehow decided we wanted huge-ass SUV things, and the Aztek, which hit the scene in 2000, was just a bit early.
The Aztek trapped a huge amount of usable room inside that kinda ungainly body, a body that featured a fastback design that’s also now gaining in popularity. And that fastback even had an optional tent attachment, something that would fit well with modern overlanding and car-camping trends.
People used the crap out of these things, just fine. Like these others, it’s just not that bad. If you can’t stomach looking at an Aztek, maybe it’s time to grow up already, and remember how many other important and good things in life can be ugly, too: like a fancy smoked leg of ham or a scrotum or a waste treatment plant.
Ford Pinto
Okay, this one is a little trickier, because the car did have a pretty significant Achilles’ heel, one that’s a big deal if you’re into Tort law. We can’t ignore that. But, at the same time, the Pinto’s engine, also called the Lima engine or the Pinto OHC engine in Europe, went on to be a really reliable and potent little engine, ending up in Escorts and Transit vans and Capris and Merkurs and even in the TVR Tasmin!
Having a great engine at its core has to be worth something, and I think what it is worth is for the Pinto to not be thrown onto these stupid worst car lists.
Chevrolet Corvair
Yes, I know about the damn book. I know that most Americans didn’t know how to deal with an oversteering car. I know all that. I also know that the Corvair was one of the most innovative and bold cars GM ever made, and I know they’re a blast to drive, too. Plus, the Corvair may have been one of the most influential American cars ever, design-wise. Look at this, which I’ve showed you before:
So, no. No way is the Corvair the worst of anything.
AMC Gremlin
The Gremlin is one of those cars that you just can’t judge without the proper context. Because the context is the entire point of the car, and in context, it not only isn’t the worst, it’s brilliant. Here’s the context: perpetually-broke AMC needed a subcompact to fight the VW Beetle and all the new Japanese imports, desperately. They had no money to develop something new, from scratch.
What they did have was designer Dick Teague, an absolute master of making something out of almost nothing. Teague chopped the back off the AMC Hornet and replaced it with a little Kammback and glass hatch, and, boom, the Gremlin was born. All of a sudden and with pretty minimal development costs, AMC had the smallest, cheapest American car, and something that could actually compete with the imports.
Sure, it wasn’t as efficient with either gas or space as its competition, but it had a distinctive look and a lot of charm. Given the context, this thing is a triumph.
Reliant Robin
Yes, it’s the butt of so many jokes, and yes, it was hilarious when Jeremy Clarkson tumbled one around like it was possessed by Mary Lou Retton’s dybbuk, but the truth is that these little three-wheelers gave weatherproof, useful mobility to Imperial tons of British people who would otherwise be stuck on motorbikes. Plus, it’s worth noting that the little Reliant kept on going after all of those rolling-overs.
These things understood the assignment.
Chevrolet Vega
Okay, maybe this one is the trickiest one on this list, because these things really did have their share of quality problems when they came out, but even with that in mind, it’s hard to call a car that sold over two million examples and looked as pretty as this one a complete failure. Because it just wasn’t.
Chevy sold as many of these as they could build during the fuel crisis era, and they were actually pretty fun to drive. There was even the Cosworth Vega hot version, which is still desirable to enthusiasts today.
Austin Allegro
Okay, this one shows up on plenty of lists, but, not being from the UK, I don’t have much experience with the car. So, I found someone who did, our own cranky Brit, Adrian Clarke:
The Austin Allegro. A car that epitomized everything shit about the British motoring industry in the late sixties and early seventies. Lovingly smashed together by strike happy workers in between labor disputes, the Allegros failure was more of BL management decision making than the car itself. Badly built and under developed, the car itself was pretty sound and really gets an unfair rap. It was probably a bit too far ahead of its time for the market, with interconnected Hydragas suspension similar to a Citroen and on the bigger engine versions an OHC set up in 1969. The shape wasn’t quite what was promised in Harris Mann’s original sketches, but it was a very modern looking thing for the era.
I guess that’s not really glowing praise, but it’s also not a total indictment, either. I’ll take it.
Trabant
The Trabant is another car that absolutely needs to be judged in context. Because, in context, the Trabant is an absolute miracle. The East German government wanted a peoples’ car, but they seemed almost perversely unwilling to give their engineers and factories the resources needed to really pull off such a monumental task. And yet, somehow, VEB Sachsenring Automobilwerke Zwickau managed to find a path, using limited resources and clever engineering, to get almost four million Trabants out there, getting people on wheels and moving.
No steel for bodies, or even fiberglass? That’s fine, because the Trabant engineers figured out how to turn old Soviet underpants into body panels. Can’t afford a fuel pump? Let gravity do the work! Government won’t approve an update to the car? Then do so much work in secret that when they get shown what you’ve done, they have to approve it. The Trabant was a car built in spite of everything, with minimal support and even outright obstacles and hostility thrown in its path, all the time. And yet, somehow, it existed, it worked, it thrived.
The Trabant doesn’t deserve to be on these lists, but you know what? I bet it doesn’t care, either, because it’s seen so much worse.
Okay! I’ve made my cases! Time to vote! Which of these unfairly treated automotive icons is most deserving of a break?
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My parents had the Aztek’s sister car, the Buick Rendezvous growing up and it was fantastic for an early 2000s car. AWD for a little extra push up the snowy driveway, a 3rd row to accommodate 3 kids plus their teammates, and my mom swears it was the easiest car in the world to park.
Didn’t want to be the family with a minivan? Drive the ugly car built on the platform!
The Vega and Allegro probably are both most belonging on the list for similar reasons, that as much as they were someone innovative, decent cars on paper, their build quality was bad enough that they’re the sacrificial totems to represent all the apathy and bad decisions to alienate customers from their respective OEM’s.
My heart says Corvair (certainly the car on the list I’d be most likely to buy, on my short list of potential classics to buy when budget allows), but it at least had some severe safety issues (albeit similar to the original Explorer, which never comes up in the same context), design mistakes for what amounts to a normal, low-priced car. My head says Gremlin – while I believe the V8-powered models could have spooky handling, they otherwise were perfectly fine cars with no substantial flaws (my father-in-law had one and loved it). The Aztek is similar (plain, adequate bones clothed in weird sheetmetal to create something unique on a budget), and it’s probably actually better than the Gremlin, but my greater exposure to early 2000’s GM’s than early 70’s AMC’s impacts my bias just a little.
I will also use this opportunity to celebrate the PT Cruiser. It gets a ton of hate, but as well, it’s a perfectly fine cheap car, Chrysler’s way of tricking Americans into paying over asking for a Neon wagon.
People forget when the PT cruiser came it sold and sold. And then sold more. Unfortunate the underpinnings were a bit pedestrian and Chrysler didn’t really develop it, but it deservedly did well (both sides of the pond).
Family had a 71 Vega that we drove until 1985 without any problems. At that point it was rusted out horribly and needed a new clutch, which we can blame mostly on my Dad for somehow always being in the wrong gear with a 3 speed.
As much as that Vega did us a solid, have to pick the Corvair. So want one!
You kept the PT Cruiser off your list. Why? It’s beyond awful in every way and now only serves as a way for weirdies to stick out in public.
Trabi, for most of the reasons already pontificated about. It’s amazing it exists and does, well, anything, given the lack of resources given to it.
However, I have to take issue with defense of the Aztek (and, by extension of this argument, the Edsel). It definitely wasn’t as bad as people want you to remember; I even wanted one when they were new, though I was 17 and possibly very dumb. However, the entire exercise of that automobile was GM not paying attention to what the customers wanted, and pushing it through anyway.
Recall the story that one of the engineers (I believe?) was asked what he thought of the car at an unveiling, and he was so proud that they hit all the internal goals. Not proud of the styling; of the revolution they were at the bleeding edge of; not of how this resonated with the customers (because it didn’t). Proud they hit the internal goals.
For that reason alone, I can’t really defend the Aztek’s place on lists like these. However, I think we can all agree that most people who write these lists have no clue why it wasn’t actually the worst car out there.
I think it is important to note the the Trabi was the literal means of freedom for east germans in the months leading up to the wall coming down in 1989.
if you were in west germany during that time (as I was) in the 6 months leading up to that glorious day the autobahns in germany (even the far western end where I was) were full of massively overloaded clown car Trabis with entire families and all their valuable possessions crammed in and on them going about 60kph in the far right lane and spewing 2 stroke smoke.
every single person I saw in one of those was beyond happy.
The car is a symbolic icon of the end of the cold war and the power of the automobile as a tool for freedom.
I don’t consider any of these other than the Edsel as a bad car. Here’s my rationale:
All of these vehicles were designed and priced as a low budget options so quality/longevity issues can be somewhat ignored. Where I find it truly offensive is when you design any ugly, unreliable vehicle that’s still expensive. For example, most any models like the X6 are offensively expensive while simultaneously being an eyesore. I find paying top dollar for X6 far worse than any issues from a Pinto or Corvair. Just my 2 cents.
Came to say this exact thing. I would drive the shit out of all those cars and love every minute of it.
YES. I hate these lists so much.
I voted Trabi. That’s a car that really existed in spite of all the circumstances, and they’re cute as hell to boot. I want one. I want to shove a Type 4 engine in it if it’d fit. I also have a death wish. These two may be related.
But man—the Aztek really predated the current crossover wave, and had a lot of fun little features and knick-knacks beyond the tent. It feels like a concept car that GM accidentally tried to sell. In terms of impact, it’s a solid number two behind the Trabi. Put some respect on that Pontiac.
Also, no love for the Cimarron? Terrible as a Cadillac, but really not a bad car overall. Not a competitor in the slightest to the E30 or any other small luxury-adjacent sports sedan of the era, but also, a pretty simple, adequate car. It’s a little GM sedan. The trim bits will fall off and the headliner will sag, but mechanically, it’s hard to kill. Its impact was more of a negative one: a case study in what not to do, ever, for most brands, but it was still up there.
I also just love weird, unloved cars. These lists are almost like wish lists sometimes. My favorite “worst cars” are always the ones that were terrible to rationalize as a new-car purchase in their era, but awesome as a weird used car. Some of the longer hack lists even put my “four doors, eleven years too late” VW 411 on there. I say, { loud fart sounds }. They’re fun cars! The 411’s huge frunk was a lifesaver when it inevitably fouled its plugs on the Lemons Rally in the middle of the night—darn near everything you need to fix it can fit in there. Type 4s are also dead simple to wrench on, which makes them a great entry into project cars if you can stomach the occasional NLA part on the 411/412, IMHO.
Some hacks even add its Type-4-powered sporty cousin, the 914, with some typical hack lines about how the Volkswagen-by-Porsche is slow and whatever (which is 914-6 ERASURE!), even though it was meant to be a sporty VW in its home market and just…fun. 914s are fun, dammit. I am convinced these “worst” list writers hate fun.
I mean I love the Cimarron because I’m a silly billy but they’re not objectively good cars, a) it’s still a cavalier underneath, and b) the price they wamted for them might as well have been highway ribbery it would be like slapping a Lincoln badge on a Ford ecosport and trying to start it at $44,999
I wonder if we should revisit the Trabant fabric panels, given the overabundance of old used cloths in the world. Might make sense for a inexpensive EV.
Exactly how I feel about Duroplast. It should definitely be in consideration to pick up where the East German chemical engineers left and come up with a Duroplast 2.0 that addresses the durability issues and retains the biodegradable/recycling aspect (definitely a excess of discarded fabric these days).
We need lighter materials for cars that aren’t as impactful to the environment in the manufacturing process as metal/alloys. Lighter cars with body panels made from recycled/recyclable/biodegradable materials would’ve made a huge difference all these years in terms of fuel economy and environmental impact, but there’s still a very good reason do more research on these materials: weight directly impacts range, one of the main factors turning people away from EVs. It’s in the automakers’ best interest to come up with lighter cars and body panels do make a difference in that aspect.
NPR’s Hidden Brain interviewed a man who, as a young engineer at Ford at the time, found that the Pinto was no worse than the other tin cans on the market at the time. Virtually all cars, especially the compacts, at the time were horrifically unsafe by today’s standards. Cars needed to get safer, but the way the Pinto was pilloried was particularly unfair.
https://www.npr.org/transcripts/904660038
Aztek for me. I saw the Regular Car Reviews video on a high-trim model and goddamn I’d buy one myself for the right place. “It’s the automotive industry equivalent of a shitpost.”
I might be more aesthetically accepting of vehicles than most people, I guess, but yeah…given it’s within my lifetime and what else I know about it, I gotta say the Aztek.
I broadly agree with the other assessments. I never heard anyone say something bad about the Edsel’s reliability or handling. (Or anything good, either, but no news is good news, right?)
One of my accounting professors went over the “Pinto memo” in class and told us that lots of cars at the time had similar issues; that all the US automakers were trying to very quickly learn how to make small, fuel-efficient vehicles, and that it just *happened* that the Pinto became the poster child.
Yet you canned on the Mazda CX-30 for a clickwheel feature that’s in every Mazda.
Redeem it.
The Corvair was an amazing car with so many variants and so much utility while being ground breaking and looking great at the same time. Ralph Nader can suck it, but that chaos did bring about NHTSA and made cars safer so something had to be a sacrificial lamb I suppose.
The early Vegas look great and would be highly coveted if the engines weren’t UTTER TRASH and had bodies that didn’t turn to dust within two years in the midwest. Still a great looking car.
Most here don’t deserve the ire, but man, the Reliant Robin is just the wrong way round to build a “trike” when it comes to stability.
Torn between Corvair and Aztek. Went Aztek as its “formula” constitutes what seems like 80% of non-pickup truck vehicles sold today. Yes it was not the prettiest thing in the world, but it did seem to nail the utility aspect of things.
Hard same all around. I was between these two. Clicked Aztek, saw that it was second to the Corvair and just nodded my head in agreement. Both are great cars that were too far ahead of their time.
Agreed. I would argue that not only is the Aztek not the worst vehicle, it was actually pretty good. There was a ton of interesting design in it, but it became one of the early victims of internet dogpiling when everyone decided it was cool to hate it.
No, Jason, the Edsel really is that ugly. I used to talk to two of them on my way to school, I thought they were lovable. But really really ugly. Aztec is that ugly too. Ugly counts for a lot.
BTW, I voted Corvair.
You missed the Multipla, which is always being in the top ten of these lists, with the BX, in europe at least. Two amazing cars, in line with the Aztek to be top of the worst.
This is a funny poll. I ended up voting for the one option that’s quite possibly the worst of the pack in absolute terms – the Trabi – because in this analysis, to me, it’s all about context. The Trabi was a triumph of ingenuity developed under very specific circumstances and limitations that none of the others had – not even the Yugo, as Zastava relied heavily on fairly decent Fiat tech since the beginning, effectively eliminating the need to develop platforms and powertrains from the ground up.
The Trabi is fascinating for lots of things, but one aspect reigns above all to me (I’m from Southern Europe so this isn’t a simple case of Östalgie or anything like that). I love that they overcame the scarcity of materials by coming up with their own composite made of discarded materials, even if Duroplast started decaying the moment cars rolled off the assembly line. I believe with the proper resources they could have come up with a better version of it, still cheap and biodegradable, but more durable if properly maintained. Such a material could have been revolutionary for the auto industry and the environment, with less demand for metal extraction (metal which, for the most part, has been crushed and stacked up in piles at junkyards), lighter cars with better gas mileage and less emissions, and a direct recycling chain reusing old bodies to make new ones (or, you know, just making bricks out of them, like they actually ended up doing in the 1990s to dispose of excess Duroplast at the Zwickau plant).
I believe such materials have a reason to exist now more than ever, and I think the Trabi has been pointing towards the right direction for almost 70 years now, and yet we’ve overlooked its relevance in favour of cheap jokes.
I recently tried to plead for the Aztec not being so bad, on our local classic car site here, as new SUV coupés from big german brands look (and are) even worse, but it didn’t really catch on with conservative Clarkson loving old men. So thanks JT for bringing it up here also (thumbs up emoji)
I usually see the Bricklin SV1 and the DeLorean on those stupid lists too, but they’re maybe number 11 and 12?
As I am from Europe, it’s the Robin for me. That the Reliant company with so few investments could pull off the 50ies “kabinenroller” idea (a motorcycle with a roof) succesfully for so many years, that’s just amazing! It deserves world recognition like the Piaggio Ape or the TukTuk.
And thanks for not mentioning the highly endangered Morris Marina, a reasonably looking bad rebodied Morris Minor (with a much less cool design than the Allegro), which was at a high risk of going extinct under the dark years of the clarksonism.
-Which again leads me to the thought: If all those lists are stupid, then what IS the worst car ever?
I’m a designer, so I’m going with the Eagle Premier, yet another strange AMC car, not even named AMC: Take a very french and beautiful Robert Opron designed Renault 25, and then strip it for every distinguishing detail, so it ends up looking like the most generic car ever, end then sticking in a strange country far away, and giving it a strange name. Really a nail in the coffin for AMC.
Oh man, as much as it may be hard to admit, you may be 100% correct on the Eagle Premier. I irrationally like it because of its Renault underpinnings, but it may be one of the most nonsensical ideas ever (even worse than thinking the Renault 9 & 11 were the right cars to go all-in in the American market).
Hey now, the Premier was Giugaro-designed (and more than a few were badged as such)!
I’m a little fond of them (that, and they donated quite a bit of their engineering and the Brampton assembly plant to the LH cars, one of which was my first car), although admittedly they were less likely to last long-term than the old-at-debut Dodge Dynasty Chrysler was fielding at the same time.
I looked for prices for a Marina a few years back, cos a hot rodded one would be HILARIOUS. Four. Fucking Grand. I could have bought a shitbox Ford Capri to resurrect for that kind of money.
I voted for the Edsel cos I don’t get the hate. All American cars from that period are just as out there design wise. It’s why the rest of the world kind of loves kind of hates them.
yeah, the Marina is kind of Europe’s Pinto: old technology, rushed to market, not too bad looking coupé design, priced right, and a bit dangerous to drive..
One car which never gets mentioned but should, is Moskvitch. 400 was a god awful copy of 30s Opel Kadett made in the 50s. Actually 402 might have been only slightly awful for it’s time and price, but the next generation 408 was at least as awful as the 400, even though it was an independently designed model. I’ve never owned one, but I have heard enough stories about them. Moskvitches were very common in Finland during the 50s to 70s because of the cheap price and good availability, but they have disappeared quite well because of their inherent, complete shittines.
“yes, it was hilarious when Jeremy Clarkson tumbled one around like it was possessed by Mary Lou Retton’s dybbuk”
I have to take issue with this quote, because that segment was not hilarious, it was shitty, and quite possibly the moment I started to not stand Clarkson. And it became even less funny once they admitted they rigged the Reliant to make sure it would tip over very easily a few years back. It was a damaging piece of misinformation created for shits and giggles and entirely based on a false premise that they took years to admit, and it had so much impact that we’re still invoking that freaking segment as an argument for how bad Reliant 3-wheelers were. Fuck that segment and fuck that guy.
That’s the greatest thing about the internet. Everyone gets an opinion. I happen to love this bit, and Clarkson. And apparently so do a lot of other people. I’m sorry, gag or no gag the car was shit.
That is indeed the greatest thing about the internet. I’m sorry, shit car or not, the gag was idiotic.
Had to go with the Corvair as they are gorgeous and obviously the most collectible of the entire list. My heart went to the Vega as I owned a ’72 for years and loved it so much I secretly lust after another.
I think the Corvair (particularly the 2nd gen) was a far far better car than it was ever made out to be. I looked at the Aztek when it first came out. It was purported to be a SUV, but the rear suspension gave about 5” of ground clearance. The hood looked ugly too.
Looking at the poll, the Aztek and Corvair both make sense.
I’ll meet the Yugo and Austin Allegro in hell. Yes, they were cheap, but an unreliable or poorly-engineered car costs people in the long run.
I voted Corvair as the best of the lot. Advanced engineering for the time, attractive and influential styling, decent performance and good handling when the suspension was sorted. Of the rest, most were a matter of poor marketing or poor quality apart from the Vega which was genuinely bad engineering and deserved its bad reputation. The Trabantand the Reliant are both old designs kept on for too long.
The car I want to vote for, emotionally: the Chevette. I did my drivers training on one back in the day, and with the automatic, it was so slow that merging in Los Angeles traffic was genuinely frightening. Driving my dad’s Chevy Sprint with a stick after that felt like a sports car. But, it isn’t a true worst car, because it was cheap, efficient, and reliable by the standards of the time.
Instead, I’ll vote for the Dodge Caliber. Butt ugly. Cheap interior. Uncomfortable seats. Gutless as hell. Handled like a boat yet transmitted every bump. Got worse mileage than my half ton pickup. And was unreliable. Total soul sucking car, in an era when there were far better options.
Add: feels like sitting in a rolling bathtub.
I concur. the one I owned was a piece of shit. Having owned, driven or been around 4 of these cars on a significant basis, the Chevette was much worse than any of those.
Gremlin, I still miss that car even though the engine eventually grenaded on me. It was a ragged out piece of junk when I bought it. I never did get all of the pine straw out, but it ran until it didn’t.
Pinto, not really a bad little car, except for that gas tank issue.
Corvair, wow. I would love to have another one now. Back in the day, they were still plenty of them around, so when I got rid of mine, I didn’t realize that it would be such a collectors item 30 years later.
Vega, friend in high school had one. It was a pretty good little car.