Music For The Long Drive Home: Savana vs Benz vs Caddy vs Mustang

Happy Friday, Autopians! We’ve survived another one, and to celebrate, we’re looking back at the week that was, and I’ve got a little scenario for you to help you choose between them. Don’t worry; it’s an easy one. But first, let’s see which van you ended up with yesterday:

It’s the incorrectly-spelled GMC by a country mile. Or country kilometer, I suppose, since it’s in Canada. (Can’t believe I got the spelling wrong; I hope you’ll all forgive me.) But that makes two serious smackdowns on old VWs this week. What did Das Auto ever do to you guys?

In any event, we have our four winners, and now you have to choose between them. But there’s one thing I forgot to mention about all four of these vehicles: they all have a tape stuck in the tape deck. By a bizarre coincidence, it’s the same tape stuck in all four cars: the 1997 album It Means Everything by ska-revival band Save Ferris, featuring their hit “Goodbye.” Also by a strange coincidence, each of these cars is about a hundred miles away from wherever you are. The album clocks in at 34 minutes and 43 seconds. What that means is, depending on how fast you drive, you’ll hear the whole thing at least twice, maybe three times, on the way home.

So what you need to decide is, which one of these vehicles do you like well enough to hear the same songs over and over again on the drive home? If you’re a ska fan like I am, this might not be a hardship: all you have to do is choose which car best fits the mood of that music. If not, you can always turn the stereo off – but then you’re subjected to whatever squeaks and rattles and other funny noises the car makes for a hundred miles.

To help you make an informed decision, here’s a quick recap:

2004 Ford Mustang convertible

Pros: Stickshift, convertible, mechanically simple

Cons: Unknown provenance, has lived a hard life

Straight from the mean streets of Brooklyn comes this scrappy New Edge Mustang convertible. It’s got the small engine, but the good transmission, and if you want more power, it’s just a few bolt-ons away. We know virtually nothing about this car’s mechanical condition–the ad is like five words long–but these cars are a known quantity, and generally have a good reputation for reliability and durability. And believe it or not, some of us actually like the styling of them.

It is a convertible, which means it also has crappy rearward visibility with the top up, the potential for water leaks, cowl shake when the top is down, and not much in the way of security from break-ins. And that’s if the top goes up at all, which we can’t be sure of; all the photos in the ad show it down. But for all that, it’s also still a stickshift pony car, and those are always fun.

1975 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham

Pros: Presence, cool factor, general condition

Cons: Questionable appearance mods, hard to park, gas hog

Feel the need for something a little bigger, a little more sinister? We’ve got you covered. This big black Cadillac beat out a rusty yellow Lincoln by about four to one. It’s got eight slappin’ pistons under its hood, and room for five of your friends to spread out and ride in luxury. That big 500 may not make a ton of power, but it’s got torque for days, and I bet it makes a glorious sound through those dual exhausts.

The original vinyl top has been removed and the roof coated in liquid bedliner, a strange move to say the least. The seller argues that it’s to protect against future rust issues, but if that’s the case, why not use it as a base layer and re-vinyl over it? The black steelies and beauty rings are a better visual change, giving it a bit of hot-rod flair, and at least the interior looks like a nice place to be.

1985 Mercedes-Benz 300CD

Pros: stylish, comfortable, should run until the end of time

Cons: no AC, heat stuck on, water leaks into interior, lots of other little things that need fixing

It’s amazing what taking away two doors will do to a car’s styling. The regular Mercedes W123 sedan is a handsome car, but this two-door hardtop coupe variant is downright sexy. It’s a car you’d be proud to be seen in, especially now that it has rounded the corner from “old” to “classic.” The fact that it’s generally reliable and durable is just a bonus.

Of course, before you let anyone see you in this particular old Benz coupe, you might want to fix the climate controls and the (probably) clogged sunroof drains. Right now it’s a hot, swampy mess in there. Oh, and only two of the four windows roll down at the moment. Best to drive this one straight home and right into the garage, and start tinkering.

1998 GMC Savana

Pros: low miles, tough as nails, blank slate

Cons: wheelchair lift (a con if you don’t want it), possible transmission issues, van stigma

Yesterday, this GMC Savana (with one N) beat the stuffing out of an old VW diesel T4, which surprised me a little. I figured that vote would be much closer. Maybe it was because of the rust on the VW. You really can’t go wrong with a full-size GM van anyway. This thing has like six moving parts, and all of them are available cheap from anywhere. And this one has the 4.3 liter V6, so it might not be a total pig on gas, either.

But there’s a downside to van life, and it comes up every time I post vans for sale. The “Free Candy” jokes were flying thick and fast yesterday, and I think I saw the phrase “down by the river” more than once. Vans carry more baggage than just what fits in the back, which is a shame, because they remain just about the most versatile and useful vehicles of all time.

So there you have your four contenders. The choice is yours, but keep in mind, you have a long drive home in whatever you choose, with only a brassy horn section, a bouncing ska beat, and Monique Powell’s sultry vocals to keep you company. Or you can turn the radio off and listen to the highway drone, if you’re the sort of person who hates fun. Choose wisely.

Bonus question:

(Image credits: Craigslist sellers)