One of the more hilarious parts of Autopian canon is the fact that whenever David talks about his wife, he calls her Elise even though that is not her real name. You know what? Car names are cool.
Today, we asked you about the most blasphemous reuse of a legendary car name. Now, some parents do get cute with names. I’ve seen Lexus a few times and I lost count of the people I’ve seen who were born as Mercedes. But, look, that was the name of Mercedes Jellinek before she had a car company named after her. I still say I named myself after the car company. Anyway, David refers to his wife as Elise here and, well, here’s what Chronometric says:
Elise. Because it’s not her real name.
Today, we also learned how Stellantis wants to have the biggest comeback in automotive history, including getting back into the segments it left. This has tickled our readers like Trust Doesn’t Rust:
We’re bringing back the Omni.
Fuzzyweis makes a sad point:
No offense to Chrysler/Dodge/Jeep/etc but isn’t this like their 5th comeback in so many decades? K-cars/minivans in the 80s, Ram trucks in the 90s, Daimler “merger” in the 2000s, FCA in the 2010s, Post-Tavares in the 2020s. Not sure how much bounce is left in the ball.
Jason has found himself quite enamored with stick-on trunks on the backs of old Minis. But they really give those cars a lot of “cake,” as the kids would say. From AlterId has reverted to their original pseud:
So fellas (Yeah) fellas (Yeah)
Has your Mini got the boot? (Hell yeah!)
So shake it (Yeah) shake it (Yeah)
Shake that roomy boot
Mini got back
Have a great evening, everyone!
My Daughter is Elise after the car, and when we had another one on the way if it was a girl I was pushing for Evora for the name.
boy, Elan?
Not Eclat?
If a daughter ever arrives in the family of Motor Trend’s Mexico Editor Miguel Cortina, it would be shame if they didn’t name her Lotus. Although the way proper names and surnames in Spanish get moved around, it might not work.
My middle and last names are those of cars, I have had dogs named Stirling, Ayrton and Fangio
“Got me humming like a turbo ‘vette” – Sir Mix-A-Lot is a bonafide car guy and one of us.
I knew (passed, sadly) someone who names his daughter Elise. He was sooooo excited for the US version of the car. He got one of the first in the states and drove it straight to a BMW meet-up (E30 M3 SigFest – he was a huge M3 guy too) after picking it up.
I don’t remember the details but the sport suspension on North Jersey roads apparently got old quick. He wasn’t exactly an athlete so the in/out was a trial too. It was not his forever car.
OTOH, I have a friend who is the original owner of an ’05 with an after market super charger. At some point we put a take-off sport suspension on it too. I don’t think he’ll ever sell it.
EDIT: Since I’m thinking about it, the US Elise was a bit of a fiasco at first. They demoted Arnie Johnson, the guy who held Lotus USA together for years selling a handful of Esprits for some suit from Volvo (?). I had an Esprit S4s at the time and my mechanic told me “They think they’re going to sell 10,000 Elises a year. It’s crazy” Anyone who’s ever sat in an Elise could tell you that was fantasy.
I once had a dog named after a car, Elva. The British Elva was named after a bastardization of the French “Elle Va”, meaning “she goes”. And my dog certainly was a runner.
But, was she a goer?
A wink’s as good as a nod!
Say no more. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
Finally, a safe space to share that my girlfriend’s name is bZ4x.
Would you mind if I asked her sister, X5M60i, on a date?
Not at all, but if Uconnect and she wants to go doubles, iDrive.
I slept with her mom, XR4TI.
whoa she had some junk on her trunk
let me guess: she’s a middle child?
Are her parents Cedric and Gloria?
I met them on a cruise – nice couple – bit obsessed about their dog, Bentley.
It is also Autopian canon that Elise is the happiest person on earth, because she always has a big smile on her face in every picture.
I think Morgan, Victoria, Maia (Subaru/Pleiades), Julia/Giulia, Shelby/Eleanor, Aston/Martin, Silvia, and Sienna are very passable car-related names. Maybe throw in an “Ava” for Toyota fans (Avalon) who would rather not honor a minivan.
Or go with Bonnie for fans of the 3800 V6.
On the other side, it won’t be long before we have some Teslas among us. For the truly mean, perhaps Edsel or Jatco.
And no matter what you name you’re kid, you’ll call them a BRAT at some point.
Well, Edsel was some poor kids name before it was a car (Edsel Ford-Henry’s only child).
I’m aware, but that was before the car reputation ruined the name.
At least, I think… I wasn’t actually around to know whether the name Edsel was ever cool but I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt!
National Lampoon readers will recall that “Pinto” is dude nickname Ref: “Pinto’s First Lay”, National Lampoon magazine circa 1976
I was thinking about this, and naturally the mind turns to music. Automobile names just lend themselves to music, for the names of bands (Galaxie 500), Albums (Cooper S), songs (Fun fun fun), and lyrics (Pablo Picasso). Bands often incorporate automobiles into their identity, on album covers and in videos.
But in terms of published songs and band names, what model has the highest count? I looked up Vista Cruiser on a lark, and it seems to have multiple bands, albums, and songs in its honor. Does any model even come close to the legendary longroof?
“Well, the girls would turn the color of the/ avocado when he would/ drive down their street in his/ El Dorado…”
On a related note, “Roadrunner” has been proposed as the official rock song of Massachusetts, and I can hardly believe it’s never gotten me pulled over on 128 when it’s dark outside.
As far as number of songs per model go, if you count generations of Corvette together, it has to be up there. “Shut Down”, “The One I Loved Back Then”, “Little Red Corvette” of course, “Two Corvettes” for that matter.
the DJ “Mord Fustang” comes to mind.
My cousin’s daughter is named Portia. The spelling is a sop to the baby-mama, he absolutely intended it to be Porsche.
I would name a daughter Mercedes (and I had a cat named so many years ago), but the car was named after a woman in the first place.
Did they have a Fish Called Wanda?
Is the daughter married to Ellen?
The Elise was named after a woman, too, the daughter of Lotus’s owner at the time.
Plenty more with women’s names- the Skoda trio of Octavia, Felicia, and Fabia. The Renault Clio and Zoe. Sundry Japanese cars. Though for cars named after *specific* women who actually existed, Mercedes and Lotus probably have it.
Cars with men’s first names are a lot rarer. I can think of the Nissan Cedric off the top of my head.
Elise is a good name.
I loved the old Elise Talk forum.
On the other hand, Escalade and Euthanasia are problematic.
I think the newest trend is naming after drug trade names.
“Eliquis, Cialis!
Get in the car!”
So Elise it doesn’t matter what you say
I just can’t stay here every yesterday
Like keep on acting out the same the way we act out
Every way to smile forget and make-believe
We never needed any more than this
Calling someone gl-10 seems a bit wierd.
In contrast, young 420G would have no trouble making friends.
My dog also happens to be named Elise, but as cute as she is, I bet David’s wife is better looking; y’know, the whole having only 2 legs and presumably not being covered in fur thing. I’m guessing she also doesn’t have a weird habit of licking blankets.
And the dog’s fave tune is… Fur Elise.
Who knows. Maybe DT and ENHRN are into the whole furry thing.
Which is fine, if so, I’ve been in the car world long enough to know there’s a surprising number of furries and it’s all chill. But I stand by my comment about blanket licking, gotta draw the line somewhere!