This I took Latin in high school, with the idea that it would help set me up to learn any language. That’s not how it happened, as any of my college Italian professors can attest. Maybe the most important thing I learned was that Joaquin Phoenix made the wrong gesture to spare Russell Crowe’s life in the movie Gladiator, which came out while I was in highh school.
A thumbs-up, back in Roman days, indicated you wanted a gladiator killed, whereas a thumbs-down meant “put your sword in the ground.” The actor and director made the right choice, because it would be hilarious if Phoenix gave a goofy thumbs-up at that moment. It just wouldn’t work.
You know what also doesn’t work? All 14 Stellantis brands existing at once. It’s enough slices! The Chairman of Stellantis is out looking for a new CEO to replace The Morning Dump’s favorite Carlos Tavares, and the big question is: What to do with all these brands?
Tavares called this a “Darwinian period” in the automotive industry, and one way automakers survive is through cooperation. GM and Honda, for instance, teamed up on hydrogen fuel cells. No more! Honda is not planning to work with GM on this technology anymore. One place where GM and Honda teamed up is with the Prologue, which continues to be a great seller in the EV space.
Germany had an election and the big issue was the economy. Will a “Kenya coalition” help save Volkswagen?
It’s Not Clear Stellantis Saves Much By Absorbing Chrysler And Ram, So Europe Is Probably The Target
Was I attempting to be provocative when I wrote “Jeep” in the headline? Yeah, of course. If a CEO candidate goes to Stellantis Chairman John Elkann and says “My first order of business is to absorb Jeep into Citroën” that candidate is going to be defenestrated from the conference room without delay.
Jeep is the one brand out of all Stellantis brands that has a strong identity, the ability to charge high-ish prices for vehicles, and can keep the company solvent. Ram, too, is one of those brands, though there’s some logic to absorbing Ram back into Dodge.
I mention this because that’s the big question Elkann has for the next CEO, according to this report from Reuters:
A source familiar with Elkann’s thinking told Reuters that the topic was a priority, and that any applicant for chief executive without an idea about the brands “is not the right candidate.”
Of course not! Could you imagine showing up and getting the question and being like “Uhhhh… we should cut Simca.” Stellantis only has these brands because it’s the awkward tie-up of PSA (which was the awkward tie-up of Peugeot and Citroën/DS) and FCA (which was the awkward tie-up of Fiat’s too many brands and Chrysler’s too many brands). Oh, and Opel. I keep forgetting Opel. Am I sad that Oldsmobile and Mercury are gone? Of course. Are Ford and GM worse off because those brands are gone? Probably not.
Hard decisions will have to be made and it’s unlikely that most of those decisions will be at the expense of American brands. Why? As explained in the piece:
Jeep accounted for at least 15 percent of Stellantis’ global sales in 2024, according to Reuters calculations, and Chrysler and Dodge around 3 percent each.
“If I were to have a magic wand … I would probably say Jeep should absorb Chrysler and Ram should absorb Dodge,” said Erin Keating of research firm Cox Automotive.
“But you are not saving a ton of money,” she added, as the four “each have their own brand equity,” complement each other in terms of range and share the same dealers.
What do you really save by Jeep absorbing Chrysler? Not much, although a Jeep-branded minivan? That’s actually a great idea. I’d never once had the thought. I’ve always assumed Dodge would just absorb Chrysler and we’d get a “Caravan” back but, yeah, now that you mention it a Jeep minivan makes sense in the way that “Me espresso” makes sense. Syntaxtually it’s a mess. Emotionally it’s a winner.
If anything gets cut it’s European brands. Lancia makes one car. Citroën has a broader lineup, but why does Stellantis need an Opel, Citroen, DS, and Peugeot version of the same car? The answer is that they do not.
Renault is in the same market and is much more successful, partially because it has fewer than half the brands. We’ve done this exercise before, of course, and I still think Lancia and DS are the first to go. Sell Maserati. Alfa gets one high-end, Ferrari-derived sports car.
That’s it.
GM And Honda No Longer Co-Developing Hydrogen Fuel Cells
I will once again go on record saying that I do not understand hydrogen as a power source for passenger vehicles. It doesn’t work. Charging times for EVs will come down way faster than new hydrogen filling stations will go up. Maybe for heavy trucks, it’s a solution. Maybe.
Honda and GM are both car companies that harbor the illusion that people want to buy hydrogen-powered cars, though they were at least smart enough to divide the expense by working together. The new Honda CR-V e:FCEV, for instance, has a jointly developed system.
That is not going to be true for the next generation car, if there is such a thing, according to Automotive News:
Honda Motor Co. is ditching longtime partner General Motors to go solo in developing and manufacturing its own next-generation hydrogen fuel cell system, the latest sign of unwinding ties between the Japanese and American carmakers amid shifting auto alliances.
Honda announced its upcoming fuel cell system Feb. 19 at the International Hydrogen & Fuel Cell Expo in Tokyo. The setup achieves double the durability and triple the volumetric power density at half the cost of the current system developed with GM and produced in the U.S.
Honda said the greater power density, a measure of the amount of energy churned out per unit volume, allows the system to be more compact so it can fit flexibly into different layouts.
Honda, for its part, is attempting to work more with Nissan while GM is collaborating more with Hyundai.
The ID.4 Is Back In The Mix
There are some people who, now, would never buy a Tesla because of the association with Elon Musk. I tend to think many people don’t care or, at least, would be persuaded by a lower price to buy one.
My guess is that if sales look really low at Tesla this quarter, we’ll see Musk offer a truly phenomenal low price on a “cheap Tesla” that’ll get a trillion pre-orders. In the interim, perhaps the best measure of the growing competitiveness of non-Tesla automakers is the resurrection of the VW ID.4 and the continuing success of the Honda Prologue.
Based on registration data, EV sales were up almost 30% year-over-year in January as people worked quickly to take advantage of the IRA tax credit while it was still in effect, according to Cox Automotive:
January marked the tenth consecutive month with over 100,000 units sold. Following a record month in December, when U.S. EV sales reached the highest level ever, a month-over-month sales decline was expected. The top five selling models, ranked by sales volume, were the Tesla Model Y, Model 3, Volkswagen ID.4, Tesla Cybertruck, and Honda Prologue, together making up 54% of total EV sales for the month. Volkswagen ID.4 had a comeback month, with sales up 653% to reach 4,979 units.
I see the success of the Honda Prologue as stemming, in large part, from the halo that the brand gives any car. The fact that people keep leasing Prologues in spite of mediocre reviews seems to support this point.
Volkswagen doesn’t have that halo. So why is the Volkswagen selling better? Some of this is pent-up demand, likely, as the ID.4 was stop-saled due to a door handle issue. Some of it, of course, is cheap leases. There’s a price low enough that people will choose an ID.4 over an, arguably, better Mach-E or Ioniq 5. Is there some other “anyone but Musk” energy here? I don’t know.
Germany To Form A New Government
This weekend we got a new election in Germany, which is a big deal for automakers in that country as they’ve been on the struggle bus lately. As usual in a country with proportional representation, there’s no single winner. The Conservative CDU/CSU party won about 28.% of the seats. The right-wing AfD party got above 20% for the first time ever, though basically every other party agreed to keep them out of government and build a coalition without them.
What’s likely to be formed is a coalition government made up of the CDU/CSU (whose color is black), the center-right SPD (whose color is red), and the Greens, which came in 4th at 11.7%. This is the “Kenya Coalition” because the combined colors make a Kenyan flag. This replaces the stoplight coalition that included the FDP (yellow), which didn’t even make 5% and thus gets zero seats.
I’ve talked before about European competitiveness and the biggest issue, as I see it, is the lack of investment. Germany has a big issue with making investments and I’m not sure any one party did well enough to fix this issue. As Deutsche Welle notes:
The rise of Germany’s extremist fringes further complicates reform of a key element of German politics: the so-called debt brake which limits fresh borrowing to just 0.35% of GDP annually. It was enshrined in the constitution to keep German debt low, but is said to have hindered urgently needed public investments.
IW’s Bergmann also said that it’s particularly problematic as mainstream parties no longer hold the two-thirds majority in the new parliament needed to amend the constitution to reform the debt brake or pass special funds.
In addition, the massive gains of the AfD, which has doubled its result compared with the 2021 election, is worrying business leaders as they fear negative consequences when recruiting urgently needed foreign workers.
Good luck with all that.
What I’m Listening To While Writing TMD
There’s a whole album from the band Seatbelts that’s basically the music from the spectacular anime show Cowboy Bebop. I am not, naturally, an anime person. I just never got into it. This show rules, though, and the songs, composed by Yoko Kanno, are worthy to listen to on their own. Start with “Tank” and don’t look back. Does this count as defiant jazz? Maybe.
The Big Question
You’re interviewing for the Stellantis CEO job and you have to cut three Stellantis brands immediately. What do you pick and why? Bonus, describe a Jeep Minivan.
Photo credit: Gladiator/Stellantis
Jeep minivan?
Okay, hear me out.
A Pacifica, but with a TRX drivetrain. Hellcat engine and long travel suspension! Also, 4 or 5 point harnesses at every seat. Hit the whoop-dee-doos with the whole family! Add a seven slot grill and you’re done!
these would be extremely popular for VIP transport at rally & offroad racing events
VW ID4: Some of it, of course, is cheap leases.” $189 per month for 24 months w/ $999 down in Pennsylvania. With tax the total is likely to be just under $6000, or just under $3000 per year. Of course, it will spend half that time in the shop – maybe you’ll get lucky and get a GTI as a loaner??
Alfa should certainly go, Jeep needs to step out of the High end land yachts and focus on the off road capable vehicle sales.
Chrysler needs to Take the Wagoneer and add the Ram Rev hybrid setup. the basic Compass can get a base Chrysler interior upgrade and the Jeep version should be a rebadged Suzuki Jimny, or a new design equivalent.
Anyone really thinking a Jeep-branded minivan, should probably go work on a bicycle article or something.
Not sure the benefit of recombining Ram and Dodge and then calling cars rams, but whatever is needed to give the Charger a chance to become a proper V8 optioned unit again.
I’m convinced the present organization of the US Stellantis brands is a product of some weird CAFE compliance loophole. Like the only way they can sell their most profitable products is if the rest of the sh*tshow is acting as a front for the former.
Jeep + Chrysler. How can a ‘Trail’ish Rated’ Caravan not be a huge hit. Mud tires, some tough looking black plastic bits and the requisite badging and you got yourself an off road package.
I’ve lost sense of what Opel/Vauxhall make. But they do (did?) have some significant engineering still in Germany.
It might be the most cost-effective approach to pare that whole arm away, but risks alienating central Europe to ‘foreign’ brands, and they could lean on a sense of nationalism on the Opel brand in Germany (apparently this is ‘in’, these days)
Dead:
RAM
Vauxhall
Lancia
Chrysler
DS (go back to being a trim)
Re-engineered:
Maserati – a 4-Door detuned, Ferrari California, and an SUV. Sold out of Ferrari.
Peugeot – Lower-tier to Citroen (akin to Skoda)
Opel – Slightly above Peugeot, but German instead of French (the VW brand)
Permitted to live as they are:
Fiat (keep the Italian labour unions happy for now)
Dodge (with the absorption of Ram)
Jeep
Citroen (with future aspirations to move the brand up)
I blasted the Cowboy Bebop OST this morning to test out the new radio I installed in my TT. Excellent choice.
“Should Ram, Jeep, Alfa Romeo, Or Chrysler Die?”
RAM as a brand should die… and Ram trucks should go back to being Dodges.
And Chryslers should be more luxurious versions of Dodges.
Other Stellantis brands that should die: Lancia and DS (should go back to being a Citroen).
Vauxhall and Opel should be under the same brand manager… just have Vauxhall be the RHD version of Opel vehicles.
“GM And Honda No Longer Co-Developing Hydrogen Fuel Cells”
I’m gonna assume it’s because they both have concluded that hydrogen vehicles are a waste of time and money and a lost cause, right? RIGHT???
“Honda Motor Co. is ditching longtime partner General Motors to go solo in developing and manufacturing its own next-generation hydrogen fuel cell system,”
“Honda, for its part, is attempting to work more with Nissan while GM is collaborating more with Hyundai.”
GODDAMMIT!!! STOP WASTING YOUR TIME AND MONEY ON THIS BULLSHIT!!!
ESPECIALLY YOU NISSAN!!! YOU’RE NOT IN A POSITION WHERE YOU CAN WASTE MONEY ON SHIT LIKE THIS.
“My first order of business is to absorb Jeep into Citroën”
I would really like to see a Citrojeep revival of the 2CV 4×4
A truly French take on a vintage Fiat Panda would be refreshing to see.
I don’t think we will be seeing a Kenya coaltion. The CDU/CSU and SPD will try to do it alone (they have a slim majority in parliament without the Greens), they will possibly fail before the term is up, we’ll see another early election, and what happens then is anyone’s guess.
It won’t be pretty, that is for sure.
Alfa should be to FIAT what Audi is to VW. Platform shared but sportier and a little more upmarket. Maserati should be converted into the parts and service organization for all brands, since their mechanics have the most experience constantly fixing (or trying to) things. Lancia should run all in-house food and catering, because all I can think of when I hear the name anymore is pasta. RAM should be to Dodge, well RAM should just be Dodge. The Jeep brand fad will eventually run it’s course so might as well milk it and not obsess over the future too much. The only reason for Opel to exist is to keep the German government and works councils happy. Stellantis will have to consider how much that matters to them, if at all. Peugeot/Citroen? Flip a coin, I say keep Citroen for their weirdness, but honestly, they need black ink more right now than weirdness. Whatever gets chosen should be tightly aligned with Chrysler to the point of common vehicle development and brand engineered vehicles. What would those be? A near luxury series of global vehicles, not necessarily sporty to compete with Alfa, but more quiet luxury. Say something like a Lexus or Buick. The trick would be having the two engineer their own unique lines unrelated to the rest of the brands. Yes, I know that goes against the whole consolidation/cost savings plan, but something that stands alone in intent is needed. See Jeep for a good example. Component sharing and engines would be fine, just make the platforms unique. And then build the two as a global offering to create brand equity for them. Use Chrysler in markets that will respond to their “pedigree” and the French one in others.
“absorb Jeep into Citroën” yes, that vehicle would be garbage, but glorious, glorious garbage!
JEEP: Cherokee, Grand Cherokee, Wrangler, Gladiator, Jimny
DODGE: Ram, Dakota, rebadged Wagoneer, Charger/Challenger, Caravan, Compass
CHRYSLER: …RIP
All of the brands could survive, I think, they all just serve different markets. Chrysler could be rebadged Puegeots, Opels and the minivan. I think the Chrysler 300 had enough buyers who really liked the car, so why can’t they put a 300 badge on a nice big Puegeot sedan, and why not make it a crossover too (call it the 400?). Stop trying to sell Fiats and Alfas in the US.
If anything, Maserati and Alfa overlap more than any of the other brands in my humble opinion. Sell off one of them.
A Jeep minivan is just a terrible idea.
Jeep + Minivan = Delica. But I won’t buy one unless it has unnecessary numbers of lights and mirrors, some type of kangaroo bar, and many, many stickers shouting “Turbo!”
Chrysler. How is this even a question. Jeep and RAM are the cash cows, Alfa is sacred to the Euro market. Chrysler makes…a van? Seriously, this brand is already dead. You can roll any product they have into another brand.
I understand your argument, but Chrysler is doing poorly as a brand simply because they’ve been starved of products. Ram and Jeep are doing fine because they haven’t been starved of products. Dodge is doing meh because what products it has gotten haven’t been great. A brand that only sells trucks shouldn’t really exist, or at least doesn’t need to. Fold Ram back into Dodge, and then spread some love to Chrysler and it’d be fine.
Dodge should be “sporty” with pick-ups.
Chrysler should just be the Mopar version of Buick combined with Cadillac.
Jeep should be Cherokees, Grand Cherokees, Wranglers and Grand Wagoneers.
The Pacifica could become a Dodge or stay a Chrysler. Also kill Alfa in the US.
Jeep has in fact stolen a lot of thunder from Chrysler with decidedly un-jeep like products. Wagoneer should be the New Yorker and look more in line with the Cadillac/Lincoln people wagons. The compass is basically a Hornet, but neither are really too much loved. the Compass needs to be closer to a street legal Side by side if it remains in the jeep stable. as it is now it would be fine as a Dodge or Ram entry level vehicle, though price is king here and that is the issue with the Hornet currently.
Exactly. I’d bet most of Jeeps products sell because they are SUVs rather than them selling because they are Jeeps. Like, is the Grand Cherokee L really selling because it’s a Jeep and not the newest/ most competitive 3 row SUV Stellantis sells here? Nothing besides styling cues make it inherently Jeep-like, it would have been a more fitting Dodge or Chrysler. Because Jeep has been getting all the product, it’s now trying to be everything to everyone and I think risks muddying up the brand image. It’s got such a weird combo of economy models, luxury version of the same economy model, off roaders, lite off roaders, generic family hauler, and now environmental luxury models. What is Jeep anymore besides SUV?
Most of Jeep’s lineup isnt even very good, and they are still successful.
Wrangler is good, but still ain’t reliable, so it’s not without problems.
The Grand Cherokee (and L) are simply noncompetitive with their V6.
The (Grand) Wagoneer is nice, but it’s certainly not as good as the competition.
The Compass just sucks.
The Gladiator is pretty cool, but not designed to be a big seller.
The Wagoneer S should have been a Chrysler or Dodge; nothing about it screams Jeep to me. No idea if it’s any good.
I would think the same as you on the GC L, but then I look at the life of the current Dodge Durango. It’s been one of the steadiest sellers averaging about 60k a year for over a decade even when sales of other CDJR have tanked, but the prior Grand Cherokee that it shared its bones has remained over 200k since 2016. Generally / with most factors being equal, buyers tend to gravitate toward the larger option for the same money, so the GC/Durango bucks that some. I’m willing to chalk it up to there just having been higher production of the Jeep to begin with though and thus just more of them to sell.
I said similar things about the Wagoneer. I’ve got no problems with a high-end Jeep, but I think it needs to be… more Jeepy? More offroady? The road oriented one should have been a Chrysler, and it should have been the direct competitor to things like the Escalade and Yukon Denali. Let the (Grand) Wagoneer compete more with things like Defenders or Land Cruisers.
I also dream that Chrysler bring back the Imperial. Make it a Bentley or Rolls Royce competitor. That’s how I’d bankrupt Chrysler.
Chrysler/Ram into Dodge/Jeep, and Maserati.
I don’t think Jeep needs a minivan, or a Renegade, or a Compass, or a Grand Wagoneer, or a Gladiator, they need the Wrangler/Cherokee/Grand Cherokee. The rest just dilutes the brand and is with Bronco around they need to be more off road focused.
Renegade/Compass can be Dodge Spirit/Aries, Grand Wagoneer can be the updated Durango.
Gladiator, Dodge already has trucks, or should instead of Ram. And they work better as trucks, plus are shorter so can actually fit in parking spaces at Home Depot.
Pacifica should be the Caravan, it’s iconic and in this day and age you can still sell one for $60k+ as a Dodge.
Nailed it. See my list just below… you and I ended up in almost the exact same place, including moving Compass and Wagoneer over to Dodge to bookend that lineup.
(I also added an entry-level model made by another manufacturer that I think wouldn’t wouldn’t dilute the Jeep brand the way the Compass does.)
After reading the original comments, I offer my unoriginal comment:
Whatever it takes to get RAM off the road, period. This is based SOLELY on my morning commute today…
…I saw a RAM pickup, fully blacked out in matte, with the rear tailgate replaced with one that uses the same exact font, but with the letters tweaked to read;
WAR
The W was the upside-down M. The whole thing was clever, up to the point of being clever, and no further. I promptly gave the driver a “thumbs down”, which I’m sure they (specifically using a pronoun to describe them) didn’t see.
In the USA:
Because Europe is more car-centric:
Kill all the rest.
RAMs are sort of like fireworks in that the people most predisposed to want them are the last people who should be trusted with them.
Kill Chrysler and just roll everything else into Dodge/Jeep in the U.S. Jeep gets the SUV/CUV stuff and Dodge everything else with a couple rebadged CUVs and a full-size pickup based model.
But the point is likely moot since Stellantis seems incapable of developing a product for the U.S. market.
Europe is harder since each brand’s popularity is varied by region.
Alfa Romeo and Chrysler can die for all I care.
Hell yeah! TANK! by the Seatbelts is great! The whole album is amazing! Excellent choice!
Love this album so damn much.
In no particular order:
Jeep stays. Jeep needs to stay in their lane and sell solid, capable SUVs. They diluted Chrysler badly by trying to go Lux.
Fiat stays.
DS folded back into Citroen as their high end trim levels. Obviously.
Peugeot stays.
Maserati, Alfa Romeo, and Lancia become three product lines, all sold as “Maserati” in each dealership, as a luxury performance brand.
Maserati brand is used for large sedans, grand tourers and SUVs. Maybe a large two door convertible. These would be full lux.Maserati-Alfa Romeo, small four door sedans and SUVs. Maybe a small two door convertible. This is the Junior/Mid-level Executive line. They already have just one CEO for both units.Maserati-Lancia becomes mostly two doors sedans and SUVs. Few, if any, four door Lancias ever again. This would be the highest performance, less luxury oriented part of Maserati. When possible, any Maserati 4×4 or all wheel drive efforts should be premiered here at least one full year before being offered on the other versions.Opel and Vauxhall become “Opel/Vauxhall” and eventually, after five years or so, just “Opel”. Sort of like Nissan/Datsun did.
Dodge stays. You can’t stock them with small cars from Europe, (especially if tariffs), but you can bring engineers over to help establish a decent small and midsize lineup. They need some bread and butter.
Chrysler stays. They should have stuck with the Aspen instead of giving up so quickly. Bring the 300 back, and add the Aspen back to their line. Large SUVs sell like crazy. They had the right idea, but had it too early. 300/Aspen/Pacifica should be enough to get them back to relevance, and could all be built on the same platform.
Ram Trucks rolled back into Dodge.
Abarth is renamed SRT/Abarth and becomes the in-house tuning arm for high-po editions of all Stellantis brands. First assignment: a halo car for each and every brand. Stellantis put way too much into show cars, and not enough into real halo cars. The Viper and the Prowler did a hell of a lot of heavy lifting to keep the brands interesting that they NEVER fully acknowledged.
Shit. I edited my comment and ruined the formatting. Forgot about that bug.
My opinion as a European:
Opel and Vauxhall used to be GM, now they are, well, I’ve no idea. It’s just a badge. Kill them now.
Lancia have only made disappointment since that one good version of the Delta. How it’s struggled on this long no one knows or cares. Kill it.
Alfa. My word, the history! The eternal crushing disappointment as yet again every new car is a bit shit, even the pretty ones. It’s kinder to take away the hope. Kill it.
DS. Once the most amazing Citroen, now a horrific marketing parasite. Ive no idea what their USP is, other than a willingness to whore out the good will from a distant but daring past. Sort of like Alfa and Lancia, but fake and terrible.
All of that said, how much do you save by killing a brand? If its all badge engineering probably not much, and possibly less than you make selling DSeses to people who’d be perfectly happy with a Citroen but are a bit stupid.
Certainly the badge-engineering in VW/Audi/Porsche/Lamborghini/Skoda/SEAT/Cupra doesn’t seem to be a problem for that whole mess of brands.
RE: VW
Of the same damned car.
Would the good people like a Touraeg of VW, Porsche, Audi, Lamborghini, or Bentley styling, today? Inclusive yes.
Three different overlapping VW models of the same SUV vehicle class? Yes.
Jeep and Ram are the only brands that have a reason to exist in the US. I can’t speak to the European market.
What’s a RAM? You mean a Dodge?
Like when Mazda went to “MX-5” in North America and everybody still kept calling it the Miata, or how everybody calls it a Mach-E instead of a Mustang, sometimes the brain trusts in the marketing departments get things so terribly wrong the world just ignores them and keeps going with “the right way”.
Such it is with RAM – go back to Dodge and quit trying to force a rebrand that isn’t sticking. It’s just just a waste of money.
I’m not cutting any of the Chrysler brands.
I’m badge engineering the shit out of the entire Stellantis portfolio until we get sharable platforms and finished product for the next five years minimum.
None of these brands would be on the chopping block if they hadn’t been starved for product.
Agreed. VW group figured it out, find each brand’s aesthetic and make a few platforms to put those different flavors on. Not every Jeep needs to cross the Rubicon trail, not every Dodge needs 1000hp and maybe work on making the cars not the least reliable in the market.
This is the best answer here; I can imagine them bringing DS cars here as Chrysler (even better if they bought back the active Hydropneumatic suspension that Citröen is famous for)