Someone Is Selling A Mountain Of 30,000 Jeep Wrangler Taillights

I really have no idea how this is possible, or the circumstances that perhaps lead up to this glorious phenomenon, or why or anything. I’m not even sure I want to know, because I may prefer this whole thing to be shrouded in beautiful mystery. And, by “this whole thing” I mean a massive mound of 30,000 “box” taillights that is currently holding court in Clayton, NC, and are currently being sold for $7/pair. The mind reels at the possibilities of 30,000 box taillights! You could outfit 15,000 Jeeps with proper lighting! You could build a massive wall of these in a grid and make pixellated, red (and some white) light animations! You could make a really uncomfortable wardrobe! The mind reels!

If you’re unfamiliar with the term “box” taillight, I can almost guarantee that if you live somewhere in North America, you’re at least familiar with the lights themselves. These are those basic, box-shaped taillights that have been used on innumerable working and utility vehicles from forklifts to box trucks to dump trucks, pickup trucks, and, perhaps most famously, Jeeps, from the CJ-5 in the late ’60s/early ’70s to the TJs of the late 1990s.

These taillights are an under-appreciated design icon; I’ve been trying to find out who designed these marvels of efficiency – two bulbs perform six separate functions – for years with no luck. I got pretty obsessed, and even made a tribute video all about them:

That one I’m holding in the video there set me back about $20 – and this King of Taillights is selling two for seven bucks! A steal!

I look at this colossal mound of box taillights and feel nothing but awe, perhaps that strange and rare feeling we call “numinous.”

You feel it too, don’t you? Of course you do – you’re human! How could you not be faced with 30,000 box taillights and not feel something stirring deep inside you?

Even at the wildly low price of $7/pair, buying the whole mound would set you back about $105,000 – a hefty investment. But think of what you could do!

The world’s largest and most painful and pinchy ball pit! But instead of balls, it’s taillights, you see. Forgive the crudeness of that mockup, but you get the idea.

Artist Amy Landesberg has set a precedent with her sculpture Tail Light Swarm, installed on a wall in the San Diego airport, and made up of 801 Hyundai Elantra left-side taillights:

Amy Landesberg's "Autoplast I: Tail Light Swarm" is on display in the Rental Car Center. Have you seen it? https://t.co/ombwOVIv01 #SANArts pic.twitter.com/OuFGp3ySGM

— San Diego Airport (@SanDiegoAirport) September 19, 2016

Maybe there need to be more massive taillight sculptures? 30,000 taillights are enough to make a 160×144 grid, which is the size, in pixels, of an original Game Boy screen! With that and some electronics and an emulator on a Raspberry Pi, you could have a massive playable Game Boy installation! You could even emulate the 4 shades of greenish by having just the taillight on, the brighter brake light, the reverse light, or both bulbs! That’s four separate levels right there! This could work!

You could build a whole, functional taillight bar from these, complete with box taillight chandeliers!

The possibilities are dizzying! And it’s not too far from where I am? Maybe I need to pay a visit to Mount Taillight, if only to pay my respects.

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(Thanks to Ted for showing me this link!)