Home » The Next-Generation Chevrolet Equinox Looks Handsome But My Editor Thinks It’s So Boring He Can Barely Proofread This

The Next-Generation Chevrolet Equinox Looks Handsome But My Editor Thinks It’s So Boring He Can Barely Proofread This

Chevrolet Equinox Topshot
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While we’re well into the dawn of an electric age, fossil fuels aren’t dead yet. Case in point? China’s new gasoline-powered Chevrolet Equinox could come to America. These photos of the new Chevrolet Equinox come to us via China’s Ministry of Industry and Information Technology, which is how many cars debut these days if they’re sold in the Chinese market, and I like what I see. But wait, Chevrolet has that new Equinox EV coming out, so why would it need another gasoline-powered Equinox in America?

First of all, the current Equinox first appeared in China under similar conditions as this one. Secondly, GM’s a car company, and companies are interested in printing money hand-over-fist. With not everyone aboard the EV train, a new gasoline-powered Equinox could pick up fossil fuel devotees and those who can’t practically charge at home. Apartment-dwellers, people with ancient 100-amp panels who commute too far to top off on 120-volt power, those sorts. Oh, and that’s assuming the Equinox EV production ramp is fast and steep — the current Equinox has sold well over 100,000 units in every year except 2022, far beyond the scope of GM’s current EV sales. In short, a new gasoline-powered Equinox might actually be necessary.

Vidframe Min Top
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Chevrolet Equinox Front

Up front, the Equinox showcases a lot of grille, but there’s a high chance that much of it is non-functional. The small lower grille probably doesn’t do much, judging by how the license plate mount is allowed to block airflow, but that’s showbiz, baby. Likewise, the upper grille could just be a garnish, with most of the breathing coming through a large, rectangular, horizontally-slatted grille smack-dab in the middle of the fascia. It’s a reasonably clean look, and combined with the very Trax-like split headlamp treatment, should help this front end age well.

[Editor’s Note: I dunno, it looks an awful lot like the Blazer:

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2023 Chevrolet Blazer Vehicle Photo

And honestly not that different from the Trax:

2023 Chevrolet Trax For Sale in Lawrence Township NJ | Ciocca Chevrolet of Princeton

And is it that much different than the Trailblazer?

2023 Chevrolet Trailblazer Sales in Sulphur Springs, TX

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I’m a little bored. And by “a little” I really mean “a lot.” -DT]

Move around to the side of the Equinox and it’s clear that GM’s gone all boxy. Think Nissan Rogue, but with more interesting touches. The shark fin C-pillar treatment is reminiscent of the B-pillar on the dearly-departed DS3 three-door hatchback, while the angular roof rail conjures up VinFast of all things. Those touches of intrigue are somewhat tempered by traditional GM touches like squared-off wheel arches and character lines that seem to butt heads, although that’s to be expected. For a mass-market vehicle to sell in droves, it helps to not rock the boat too much.

Chevrolet Equinox Rear

Around the back, Chevrolet continues its crusade to put C7 Corvette taillight wings on everything. From the faux-vents on the Trax come the swooping form of the Equinox’s taillights, and it works. Job done, I reckon. It’s a dramatic enough gesture to take eyes off the fairly plain form of the Equinox’s rear end, but sometimes a bit of oatmeal is good for you. From the tall bit of unpainted cladding right up to the hatch opening so you don’t scratch any paint loading and unloading cumbersome items to the trapezoidal license plate relief, the rear end of the Equinox feels decidedly functional, as it should.

While there aren’t many pictures of the new Equinox out right now, the Ministry has published lots of close-ups that seem to indicate that a GM product is made of very GM-looking parts. Who knew? Still, there are a couple takeaways from this collage: A 360-degree camera system is available, a panoramic moonroof is on the options list, and the base alloys don’t look bad. Not the most enlightening info, but still, good to know.

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Chevrolet Equinox Collage

Power comes from a 1.5-liter turbocharged four-cylinder engine which totally sounds like it could make it across the ocean, mostly because it already has. The GM Small Gasoline Engine has appeared in various American-market vehicles over the past few years including the current Equinox. Experience with a very similar engine in a late-model Chevrolet Malibu suggests it’s pretty adequate, capable of moving a midsize sedan from a stop to speed with neither joy nor derision. It’s what you’d get if Canada’s ominous No Name brand sold a giant yellow crate labeled “Four-Cylinder Powertrain.” For a mass-market crossover, it should do nicely.

Overall, the new Chevrolet Equinox looks to be a handsome, practical-looking mass-market two-row crossover that should find more homes than just Hertz and Avis. While it’s yet to be seen if it’s sold in America, don’t count it out. GM plans to go all-electric in 2035, which means we could still have more than a decade of new gasoline-powered vehicles.

(Photo credits: GM)

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EmotionalSupportBMW
EmotionalSupportBMW
1 year ago

Being a drunk and/ or poor visioned Chevrolet sales person just got more challenging! The Lot Porters will all descend into Crossover Madness! Can one wash the white Trailblazer when all crossovers are Trailblazers, yet only some are Trailblazers.

Chris Stevenson
Chris Stevenson
1 year ago

Oof, that D-pillar is…something. The rest of the design is bland to the extreme, but that D-pillar is, as the Brits say, a dog’s dinner.

Squirrelmaster
Squirrelmaster
1 year ago

GM knocked it out of the park when it came to awful C- and D-pillar design. I didn’t think anyone could beat Nissan at awkward, unsightly floating-roof C- and D-pillar design, but then Chevy went and did it.

The worst part is that it’s the only part of the design that is in any way interesting, and it’s only interesting in how ugly it is. GM will somehow still print money with this thing…

Last edited 1 year ago by Squirrelmaster
MATTinMKE
MATTinMKE
1 year ago

I’m with DT on this one. Snoozefest.

Tim R
Tim R
1 year ago

It’s probably not good for GM that I have no idea which segment each of these models are playing in. We’ll be looking for a new SUV for my wife soon, but I don’t think I care enough about these to figure out which to look at

Trecoolx
Trecoolx
1 year ago

It’s hard to make a white box look attractive. I think they share similar senses of being inoffensive with stabs at edginess (the current thin headlight trend, various cuts in the side profiles), while being safe enough to not offend.

Rust Buckets
Rust Buckets
1 year ago
Reply to  Trecoolx

It’s also hard to make a white box look conspicuously offensive to the eyes, but Chevy has done the impossible once again.

Frown Victoria
Frown Victoria
1 year ago

Your editor is correct.

Andy Individual
Andy Individual
1 year ago

TRENDEEE!!!

*YUK*

JurassicComanche25
JurassicComanche25
1 year ago

It’s every other chevy crossover/suv on the market. It’s trying to get the people who bought beige toyotas and didn’t care what they look like. I hate it so much, I don’t hate it. I just don’t care. It has the flavor of slightly warm water- no flavor, and somewhat disheartening because you really want cold or room temperature. At this point, my old 1999 blob-eye Sable that was gold on tan had more personality and uniqueness than this.

Where’s that meme of the kid poking something with a stick saying ‘come on, do something?’ That’s how I feel. Do something, designers.

TOSSABL
TOSSABL
1 year ago

Yes! This exactly. Yesterday I saw one of the squinty Grand Cherokees that I wasted much ire on, and I was like, meh; it doesn’t bother me anymore. Then I saw a jellybean Taurus wagon and was both oddly nostalgic (I didn’t care for them at the time), and glad to see one driving proud & not beat-to-shit

John in Ohio
John in Ohio
1 year ago

I know it will never happen but it would be nice if these companies made their models with different looks rather than some slight change in corporate fascia. I wonder if it still has the shitbox ecotek engine that likes to grenade itself?

Last edited 1 year ago by John in Ohio
Mr Sarcastic
Mr Sarcastic
1 year ago
Reply to  John in Ohio

Yeah if you are doing something new fix the worst thing about it. But I am a BA and Marketing graduate so what do I know?

SparkySparkington
SparkySparkington
1 year ago

Oooof. Sure, it’s nicer than the outgoing model but that looks like someone took the Mitsubishi Outlander and liberally hit it with the boring stick.

I would also go so far as to say that the order presented in the article, Equinox < Blazer < Trax < Trailblazer is exactly the ascending order of attractiveness of these crossovers, and it likely has something to do with the roughly descending order of size… The margins are slim, though.

On the other hand, the Equinox EV renders look a lot more promising…

W124
W124
1 year ago

It looks completely decent fridge or microwave oven or EKG machine or whatever this appliance is, I just forgot.

Last edited 1 year ago by W124
W124
W124
1 year ago
Reply to  W124

After this I think I might do something exciting like go see a blank paper.

Mr Sarcastic
Mr Sarcastic
1 year ago
Reply to  W124

No way, no ice maker or popcorn button.

Mark Tucker
Mark Tucker
1 year ago

This is a little like trying to get excited about a new pattern of dish towels at Target.

Trecoolx
Trecoolx
1 year ago
Reply to  Mark Tucker

New dish towels dropped?!? I didn’t get the notification!

Mark Tucker
Mark Tucker
1 year ago
Reply to  Trecoolx

Spring collection, dude. Harvest Gold AND Sage Green.

10001010
10001010
1 year ago

1) This is the best headline for any article on this site so far.
2) DT is right, if you mixed up those white Chevy SUVs above and asked me to tag the right name on each one I would fail.

Chronometric
Chronometric
1 year ago

I think Torchinsky once did a bit about the cliche that all white crossover SUVs look the same. He tried to convince us that it wasn’t true. It was a classic Torch bad take.

Mr Sarcastic
Mr Sarcastic
1 year ago
Reply to  Chronometric

Yeah and i believe the only way to tell was size.

Trust Doesn't Rust
Trust Doesn't Rust
1 year ago

BMW and Audi are absolutely guilty of the “same sausage, different length” approach to design.

Chevrolet can be described as “same shredded wheat, different square”. Their crossovers are so god. damn. boring. These vehicles are VIOLENTLY dull. The thing is, it’s not a bad design language on it’s own. It’s not an amorphous blob (I’m glaring at you, Buick). It includes angles, curves and little flare-y bits. If these crossovers existed in a vacuum, I wouldn’t have much to rant about. In reality, they’re just so banal. Thankfully, these are just pictures of the exterior. I actually dread seeing photos of the interior. If someone walked up and asked me “Do you want to see the interior of the new Chevrolet Equinox?” My answer would be “I would rather you shoot me in the face.” and then I would slap the pictures out of their hand.

And. AND. SOMEHOW. This is better than the current Equinox.
It’s like Chevrolet actively tried to not try.
Metaphorically, my life during my first marriage could best be described as the new Chevrolet Equinox.

I’m angry at how trite this vehicle is.

Parsko
Parsko
1 year ago

COTD

PresterJohn
PresterJohn
1 year ago

Everything about this screams rental car

Acrimonious Mofo
Acrimonious Mofo
1 year ago

I am with * yawns * David on this one.

Mr Sarcastic
Mr Sarcastic
1 year ago

But is it the manufacturer or dealer? We know dealers always put bland and unoffensive on the lot and people buy it because they themselves are boring or because that is what is on the lot.

When I first saw an ad for 50 Shades of Grey I thought it was the color chart for the new line of BMWs

Rollin Hand
Rollin Hand
1 year ago

Refreshed, but I wouldn’t go so far as refreshing.

That is a car. That’s it. A car.

Taargus Taargus
Taargus Taargus
1 year ago

This certainly looks better than the current one, which in my mind is one of the worst looking cars on sale today.

But yes, it is still pretty darn boring.

GreatFallsGreen
GreatFallsGreen
1 year ago

I think I read somewhere when the current one debuted, the initial design tested poorly in focus groups, maybe for looking too vanlike. That made me really want to see what it originally looked like since it’s still homely to me. The Terrain I like quite a bit though.

This looks decent, an improvement over the current, almost seems like they’re toughening it up to visually differentiate it more from the EV version. I can see the ICE Blazer bowing out once the EV is out, but Chevy sells too many Equinoxes currently to bet that all on just the EV version.

Clear_prop
Clear_prop
1 year ago

It reminds me of the old Top Gear episode where they had a bunch of SUVs to test towing caravans with, and they couldn’t tell any of them a part.

The design language of most small SUVs is so similar these days that if you threw a RAV4 badge on it, no one would notice.

Rust Buckets
Rust Buckets
1 year ago
Reply to  Clear_prop

Also big SUVs

Cheats McCheats
Cheats McCheats
1 year ago

Seems Chevrolet took over the “Beige” moniker from Toyota.

Canopysaurus
Canopysaurus
1 year ago

“Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,” says Charlie Brown’s teacher.

Mr Sarcastic
Mr Sarcastic
1 year ago
Reply to  Canopysaurus

I think that is wah wah wah

IanGTCS
IanGTCS
1 year ago

I think this looks a lot better than the previous couple of generations. I frequently drive a 2016 at work and it is fine. Not great, not bad. It has been pretty reliable, one sensor and one AC compressor over 7 years. My biggest problem is that no matter how I adjust the seat I just can’t find a sweet spot. I also accept that I’m an oddly built tall man (all torso, stubby little T-Rex arms) so my experience isn’t representative. I probably wouldn’t spend my own money on one but with a $6000 savings compared to a CR-V I certainly wouldn’t judge anyone who buys one.

First Last
First Last
1 year ago

Whirlpool. Maytag. Equinox.

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