Home » There’s A Surprising Amount Of Weird Things In This 1964 Buick Brochure: Cold Start

There’s A Surprising Amount Of Weird Things In This 1964 Buick Brochure: Cold Start

Cs Buick64 1
ADVERTISEMENT

Well, maybe not exactly weird, but there certainly are some odd choices, at the very least. Like the picture up there, showing off the decadent luxury of the interior of a Buick Riviera. Who sits like that? And how much does that woman like that armrest? Because from here it looks like she likes that armrest a lot. Like, more than almost anything else. She’s sitting on the ground, oddly close to the car, leaning here face up against the door card faux wood insert and caressing the leather of the armrest, her fingers gliding sensually over its liver-brown expanse. And then dude is there, just watching and chuckling, possibly in amusement, possibly in arousal.

Are they on a beach? In a desert? Was this a planned stop, or did they just need to pull over so that armrest could be really enjoyed?

Vidframe Min Top
Vidframe Min Bottom

If the dude moves, will that door just swing open more from the lady’s weight and she’ll flop to the ground? I really have no idea.

Cs Buick64 2

Is this woman dancing? This looks like it was shot mid-dance. Did she just come screeching to a halt by this field of wildflowers so she could dance away the pain or joy or hunger or whatever?

ADVERTISEMENT

Cs Buick64 8

I do like how many of the interior shots give a little bit of story by including some activity that one can see, blurrily, outside the door that’s been left ajar. Usually it’s innocuous fun stuff, like this guy surrounded by six or so dogs. Then there’s this one:

Cs Buick64 3

Where the dude with doggos felt like something we were supposed to see, happily, this feels like we’re catching a glimpse of something sinister, something we were not intended to notice. That frogman’s gait looks like the determined stalk of a hunter, and what is that long rod-like thing he’s holding in his hand – a harpoon? This feels like we’re seeing a trained assassin sent out to commit some manner of underwater murder. And if he sees us, we’re next, so keep your head down!

Cs Buick64 4

ADVERTISEMENT

These shots of cars in improbable places with no clear way that they got there are a car brochure staple. Why did this guy drive out into that dead-looking field of some kind of dead crop? Is it sorghum? Where are the tire tracks? And I just now saw the dog there! Did you see the dog?

Cs Buick64 5

love this image: red, engines, people. These are four of the five engines offered by Buick in ’64, and I don’t fully understand the relationship of the people chosen to the engines, but I love it. Is the guy with the pool cue contemplating that V8? Is Breakfast at Tiffany’s there looking at me? Are those two at engine prom? This is such a wonderful and strange way to present these.

Also, read this copy here:

Cs Buick64 6

ADVERTISEMENT

I’ve never read a brochure where the word “others” so clearly means “some poor bastard.”

Cs Buick64 7

The brochure also just has some fantastic illustrations of cars over white backgrounds, which I love as someone who has to make images for this website. These are gold – rights-free (because they’re from a manufacturer’s brochure) car images that are easy to pull from a background – they’re gifts!

In the same category is this dash image:

Cs Buick64 Dash

ADVERTISEMENT

I’m mostly including it here because I know I’ll need it later and now I can find it easy, already uploaded! Work smarter, not harder, friends!

Share on facebook
Facebook
Share on whatsapp
WhatsApp
Share on twitter
Twitter
Share on linkedin
LinkedIn
Share on reddit
Reddit
Subscribe
Notify of
51 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Danangme69
Danangme69
6 months ago

At 72 I just learned at a local classic auto meet that a Buick Electra 225 meant it was 225 inches long.

Eggsalad
Eggsalad
6 months ago

Hate to break it to you, but if you’re driving a big Buick in the 1960s, there are definitely people “beneath you” to load your trunk in the rain. The bellman at your fancy hotel, for example.

But heck, even if you’re driving a 1959 Rambler in 1965, the “bag boy” from the grocery store is loading your groceries in the trunk. Now tip him a quarter.

Dodsworth
Dodsworth
6 months ago

Three out of four Buick engines have alternating erections. This happens when a pretty lady rubs an armrest.

Urban Runabout
Urban Runabout
6 months ago

The lady on the ground holding on to the door of the Riviera is clearly drunk – The guy is looking down at her in amusement.

The next Riviera lady is clearly flipping her hair back – because the wildflowers are to be savored, like her Riviera.

Oh, and the handsome man nonchalantly leaning against his Wildcat?
He’s clearly awaiting the local hunky Farmer for a rendezvous – which we couldn’t really talk about in 1964, but could only allude to – so it’s nice that the Farmer brought his dog to run out and greet his friend before the men get down to doing their manly things.

John Beef
John Beef
6 months ago

That’s a lovely dashboard. Where are the vents? Maybe because I’m in Arizona, I like air blowing on me at all times while driving.

Autonerdery
Autonerdery
6 months ago
Reply to  John Beef

If these Buicks are like my Corvair, they probably have fresh air vents in the kick panels ahead of each front door in the footwells, with a little push/pull knob to open and close them. A/C would have been either a factory or dealer-installed option; a factory system might have had the vents and controls somewhat integrated into the dash, but a dealer-installed system would be a separate unit hanging underneath.

Urban Runabout
Urban Runabout
6 months ago
Reply to  John Beef

Dashboard vents on standard GM fullsizers are 12 months in the future.

Last edited 6 months ago by Urban Runabout
Gilbert Wham
Gilbert Wham
6 months ago

That green 2door is a fine looking slab of absurdly large automobile. Mmmm-hmmmm.

Boulevard_Yachtsman
Boulevard_Yachtsman
6 months ago

Those engine pics are terrific – they remind me of how auto-makers used to be proud of what propelled their machines, encouraging one to open up the hood of their road-going petro-barge just to stare at it in awe.

Nowadays, should they bother, a person is greeted by a swath of plastic which may as well say “keep out”.

Last edited 6 months ago by Boulevard_Yachtsman
FrontWillDrive
FrontWillDrive
6 months ago

I came across another odd Buick brochure photo last night, I was talking to my boyfriend about the 72 Skylark Sun Coupe, and one of the photos I found online of a Buick brochure shows the Sun Coupe, which has its roof open while a woman is sitting on the seat back, she has her head out the roof while holding an apple pierced by an arrow, and a guy behind the car holding a crossbow. In the far background a guy appears to be staring them down. I wasn’t sure what that scene has to do with a Sun Coupe, I would think a convertible would serve better for drive by archery.

Jason Roth
Jason Roth
6 months ago

“Footloose owners will find the cavernous trunk especially to their liking. It takes a mighty load to fill this one.”

DubblewhopperInDubblejeopardy
DubblewhopperInDubblejeopardy
6 months ago

Each photo can correspond with a song

Top Picture: Queen- I’m In Love With My Car

2nd Pic: The Classics IV: Spooky

3rd: Pink Floyd-Dogs

4th: Ed Sheeran-Dive

5th: Pink Floyd-Seamus

Kevin B
Kevin B
6 months ago

She’s listening to the empty beer can the assembly line worker had to ditch because the foreman was coming.

Rad Barchetta
Rad Barchetta
6 months ago

“Here, put your ear up to the door while I shake it. See if you can figure out where that rattle is coming from. Yes, I know it’s a brand new car. Shut up. It’s 1964 and this is a Buick for god’s sake. You can’t expect everything to be work right. At least it’s not British.”

Jim King
Jim King
6 months ago

Dang, that armrest!

Canopysaurus
Canopysaurus
6 months ago

The women in the top two pictures have clearly dropped acid.

Dog man might be taking a ride with Timothy Leary, too. You can imagine him tripping along then seeing the dogs and thinking, “Oh, puppies,” whereupon he slams on his brakes and dashes over leaving the car in the middle of the road with the door hanging open. open.

Speargun Kelly appears to be wading into the water that’s splashing over his calves. The surf also looks to be running right up to his car with its open door. Can’t tell if anything nefarious has happened because it’s hard to see blood on black leather.

Big Red has backed into the wheat field and is taking a break while contemplating his next crop circle pattern and wondering whether farmer’s dog is going to bite him.

Dale Mitchell
Dale Mitchell
6 months ago
Reply to  Canopysaurus

second woman is not dancing; just brushing her hair aside to see what she just stepped in

Col Lingus
Col Lingus
6 months ago

Just think Bob. If this door wasn’t in the way, it could be your lucky day.
Or maybe not…

Citrus
Citrus
6 months ago

Put your ear close enough to the ’64 Riviera’s door panel and you can hear the ocean.

Jack Trade
Jack Trade
6 months ago

Along the lines of Torch’s improbable places observation, the best part of the frogman pic is that according to it (check out the churning water), the car is parked in the surf. With the door open.

Last edited 6 months ago by Jack Trade
Flyingstitch
Flyingstitch
6 months ago

I think the universe is telling me I need a 1st-gen Riviera. I had just mentioned it in the “what car makes you feel funny inside” post, and here it is again!

Boxing Pistons
Boxing Pistons
6 months ago

“You asked for it and we listened. We designed the new Buick Electra hardtop with the sportsman in mind. The class-leading trunk now swallows a whole gross of harpoons!”

Jonathan Hendry
Jonathan Hendry
6 months ago

love this image: red, engines, people.”

I don’t know why but these images have big “70s board game” energy.

BolognaBurrito
BolognaBurrito
6 months ago

A ’64 Electra 225 2-door coupe, or a ’64 Wildcat 2-door hardtop are up there for my desire for my next fun car. Unfortunately, my garage is too small for either.

My garage is also too small for a ’60 Invicta 2-door hardtop, or ’60 Electra 225 2-door hardtop which would be next in line.

I need a bigger garage.

Boxing Pistons
Boxing Pistons
6 months ago
Reply to  BolognaBurrito

“I need a bigger garage” this is the correct conclusion. Man, I love 60’s Buicks! My absolute favorite is the ‘65 Riviera with those clamshell headlight covers. The interiors were awesome, too!

BolognaBurrito
BolognaBurrito
6 months ago
Reply to  Boxing Pistons

My ’65 Suburban barely fits. I’ve got chock-blocks to stop me perfectly, then I have to shimmy along the side of it to get out.

Any working on it requires backing it out into the driveway.

A. Barth
A. Barth
6 months ago

Regarding the engine people…

Pool cue guy is a flashy rogue, hence the chrome air cleaner and shiny valve covers.

Posh lady is accustomed to luxurious space, so her engine takes up more room but has a more subdued color palette.

Business man wants a sporty, sleek model so his engine is more compact.

The newly-married people at the end are just starting out and can afford only a smaller engine with no AC. The husband might be the poor bastard who is loading the remotely-opened trunks on the nicer cars.

Drshaws
Drshaws
6 months ago

Please explain to me the difference between the Electra 4-door hardtop and the 4-door sedan … which has a solid roof?

And talk about sinister – the Electra 2-door sport coupe is basically inviting someone to stash a body in the trunk. “It takes a mighty load to fill this one.” Especially for those “footloose” owners – what does that even mean?

Tbird
Tbird
6 months ago
Reply to  Drshaws

Hard top = no B pillar and frameless glass. Wide open expanse with windows down,

The sedan had a B pillar and framed windows – dowdy in comparison.

Last edited 6 months ago by Tbird
Drshaws
Drshaws
6 months ago
Reply to  Tbird

Ah. Used to seeing that on coupes (w123 300CD comes to mind immediately). Good to know.

A. Barth
A. Barth
6 months ago
Reply to  Tbird

Yup. I like that the picture of the guy with the dogs and one with the trained aqua-assassin both place the items of visual interest in the middle to emphasize the B-pillar-less nature of the cars.

“SEE? If you had B-pillars they would spoil your view!”

BolognaBurrito
BolognaBurrito
6 months ago
Reply to  Tbird

The rear C-pillar is also far larger on the hardtop, while the sedan has little quarter windows and narrow pillars there.

DONALD FOLEY
DONALD FOLEY
6 months ago
Reply to  Tbird

The kids these days just don’t know about hardtops, a signature body style that has just about disappeared.

BolognaBurrito
BolognaBurrito
6 months ago
Reply to  DONALD FOLEY

To be fair, depending on the brand, they could use completely different terms for the same thing, and some even included window counts to separate even more.

You had things like 4-door 4-window hardtops, 4-door 6-window hardtops, 2-door 4-window hardtops, 2-door holiday coupes, 4-door holiday sedans… you basically have to look at all the options that existed for the specific model that interests you, and then learn what each variation actually meant. Even then, when you try to Google image search them, loads of them are labeled wrong so you’ll get confused as fuck.

Heck, just look at all the variants for the first generation (’59-’60) Electras…

4-door 4-window hardtop4-door 6-window sedan2-door hardtop (not available on 225)2-door convertible (225 only)4-door 6-window Riviera hardtop (225 only)5-door 5-window ambulance (225 only)

Last edited 6 months ago by BolognaBurrito
Protodite
Protodite
6 months ago
Reply to  Tbird

The no B pillar look is just incredible. It’s easily the sexiest detail in a car

Flyingstitch
Flyingstitch
6 months ago
Reply to  Drshaws

You beat me to it. Ominous is all over this brochure.

Lew Schiller
Lew Schiller
6 months ago

Watching a History Channel thing on the origin of the automobile last night and right there in it up popped Torch! Nice.

NewBalanceExtraWide
NewBalanceExtraWide
6 months ago
Reply to  Lew Schiller

I caught that last week, I think, and heard the unmistakable voice and stopped whatever I was doing

Lew Schiller
Lew Schiller
6 months ago

Right. Torch! ,I said, much to my wife’s confusion.
Oh … and I wear New Balance not just for the fashion statement they are but also because they reliably have the 13 wide I require.

Last edited 6 months ago by Lew Schiller
Double Wide Harvey Park
Double Wide Harvey Park
6 months ago
Reply to  Lew Schiller

Asics and Skechers as well. And Allen Edmonds.

Musicman27
Musicman27
6 months ago

I think it’s funny you called the harpoon fisherman a “trained assassin”.

Musicman27
Musicman27
6 months ago

Good point…

Tbird
Tbird
6 months ago
Reply to  Musicman27

Well, “Thunderball” came out around this time…

DONALD FOLEY
DONALD FOLEY
6 months ago
Reply to  Tbird

The book in 1961, the film in 1965.

Geoff Buchholz
Geoff Buchholz
6 months ago
Reply to  Musicman27

Also, was he in such a hurry to spear his quarry that he couldn’t have closed the car door? Good grief, his Wildcat’s battery will be dead by the time he gets back!

Musicman27
Musicman27
6 months ago
Reply to  Geoff Buchholz

I can imagine a narrator in a kid’s show saying “Jeffery loves impaling fish for food, so much he left his door open!”

51
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x