This $30,000 Pint-Sized Porsche Is Probably Better Than Your Real Car

Some cars are little more than toys for grown-ups. At their best, cars are engineering feats and works of art to varying degrees, but when a car is at its very best, it’s playful. It is no longer a vehicle that, by definition of the word, must demonstrate some level of practicality as a means of transporting people or goods. It only needs to be exciting, enjoyable, exciting, energizing … you know, fun. As one automotive personal relations employee once told me, “Nobody needs a Porsche.”

If that’s true, then it’s even more accurate to say that nobody needs a kid’s Porsche. Despite that, one is going up for sale at Pebble Beach, and it’s so good that it might be better than the car you’re driving right now.

Dubbed the Dakar Children’s Car, this pint-sized Porsche is a production of Halfscale Cars out of the United Kingdom, and it’s not merely a 911-shaped shell draped over a standard-issue go-kart. This little machine is finely crafted like a full-size luxury-performance car, with performance to match.

Under the adorably chonky Porsche bodywork is a 400cc engine that makes 15 horsepower, which gives the nono-911 sufficient scoot to reach 50 mph. If you’re concerned that’s too fast for your 4-foot-tall Porschephile, no worries –  Halfscale says buyers can limit the car’s top speed.

Of course, the car features real rack and pinion steering, independent wishbone suspension, coilovers, and genuine Brembo brakes to bring the car to a halt. It has Kenda tires wrapped around 15-inch wheels with mudflaps to finish the look.

It has functional headlights, a detachable steering wheel, and an interior outfitted in houndstooth and Connolly leather complete with lap belts. Says Halfscale, “The junior car drives like a full-size vehicle, simply scaled down. Increased 5’ ground clearance and uprated shocks ensures a smooth drive over any terrain.”

Does your car have Connolly leather and houndstooth? Neither does mine. What about Brembo brakes and a detachable Moto-Lita leather steering wheel? I’m zero for two.

According to Halfscale, every Dakar example takes over 100 hours of work to complete. The example up for auction is hand-painted in the legendary Rothmans livery. What better for a kid’s car than a tobacco livery?

Halfscale actually makes far more cars than just this 911 Dakar tribute, nor is it the only model to wear tobacco logos – see the Williams FW14-Junior complete with Camel logos (and Labatt’s beer!), an homage to the FW14-B piloted to the F1 World Driver’s Championship by Nigel Mansel in 1992. And if it’s more Porsches you seek, below is a short video showcasing Halfscale’s 917 JNR, a 72% scale “reincarnation” of the Porsche 917. It features a 9-horsepower engine and a top speed of just 35 mph.

Perhaps the most extravagant offering is the Crystal Car, which arrives with over 100,000 Swarovski Xirus crystals frosting its E-Type-inspired bodywork. “Each individual car takes our dedicated team approximately two months to crystalize alone,” says Halfscale on its product page.

The Dakar Children’s Car goes up for sale at RM Sotheby’s auction during Monterey Car Week. It currently has a guidance of $20,000-$30,000. If you felt bad that this kid-car is actually nicer than the machine you’ll drive to the office on Monday, maybe that steep price will make you feel a bit better.

Finally, it’s worth noting that some of the esteemed representatives of The Autopian will be in attendance at Pebble Beach during Monterey Car Week and at least one of them might try to fit inside of this thing. If it happens, we promise to get photos of it.