Happy Friday, Autopians! I’m writing this on Thursday evening, and I’ve got to make it quick: my wife and I are going to a concert tonight. We’re going to see a band from the ’80s named after a sci-fi villain from the ’60s (ten points* to you if you know who I mean). This means I don’t have time to pick cars, but since it was a short week, our three previous winners set us up perfectly for a round of track-daily-burn.
But first, we need to know our third winner:
Well, look at that! I guess it really is hip to be square. The Cube takes a comfortable win. But again, I don’t think either one is a terrible choice. And thanks to a couple of commenters for the education on Fiat’s “Multi-Air” intake; that’s a rabbit hole I’ll dive down when I have more time.
Now then: Here are the rules. You must choose one car as your daily driver, your primary mode of transportation. You must choose another to set up for the motorsport activity of your choice, be that track days, dragstrip racing, time-speed-distance rallies, autocross, whatever. And whatever car you don’t select for those two roles must be destroyed by fire. Let’s take a second look at our week’s winners to help you decide:
1984 Chevrolet Caprice Estate
This family cruiser for days of yore was our winner on Monday. It features a weak-sauce 305 cubic inch version of Chevy’s small-block V8, and an overdrive automatic with the shifter on the column, where the car gods intended. Several commenters mentioned swapping the 305 for something healthier the first time around, and I can’t help thinking that this would make a great sleeper at the dragstrip: imagine the shock on some kid’s face when he gets his doors blown off by Clark W Griswold.
Then again, it’s currently a daily driver, and that big bench seat does look mighty comfy. You could do a lot worse for commuting. It’s the oldest and the slowest of the three, and arguably gets the worst mileage (if you could keep your foot out of the Mustang, that is), but probably the quietest and smoothest ride as well. But if none of that appeals to you, velour is probably mighty flammable…
2001 Ford Mustang GT
“Rode hard and put away wet” is probably the kindest description of this thoroughly hammered Mustang GT. It’s got almsot 200,000 miles on it, some questionable modifications, and mismatched body panels that hint at a history of poor driving choices. But it’s a V8 and a manual, and it does run and drive. So there’s that. It’s quick-ish already, and the aftermarket stands ready and able to make it even quicker and handle even better.
You could daily-drive a Mustang; lots of people do. But commuting in this one would mean sitting down in that trashed leather seat every day, grabbing that grubby steering wheel, dealing with that stupid aftermarket pistol-grip shifter. But hey, kudos to you if you want to try. Or torch it. It’s not like it’s got a lot of life left in it anyway.
2010 Nissan Cube
Yesterday’s winner seems like the most sensible choice for a daily driver. Small, maneuverable, easy on gas, and probably pretty cheap to insure. But small and maneuverable when combined with a stickshift could also make it fun on a racetrack or an autocross course. And I imagine you’d be something of a hero if you showed up to a track day with a race-prepped Nissan Cube. There can’t be many around.
But I also know a lot of you are no fans of Nissan, nor do you particularly like the Cube’s oddball styling. So I guess I couldn’t blame you for letting it burn. But before you do, consider how few cars there are in the world with six-speed manuals, and how many fewer are available with one than when this one was built. Can we really afford to lose one?
All right. You have your assignment, and you have your three contenders. No poll today, because it would have like nine entries, and nobody wants to deal with that. Just discuss, trash-talk, debate, and plead your case in the comments. Have a great weekend!
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(Image credits: Craigslist sellers)
I would daily drive The Caprice Wagon. An excellent comfy cruiser.
The Mustang goes to 24 Hours of Lemons. Blow out in a blaze of glory.
Burn that horrible Cube. Very few cars make me want to commit an act of violence. Its mother smoked, drank, and took drugs while pregnant. I sincerely apologize to all Cube lovers. I loathe it so.
Hell yeah
We should do Track/Daily/Burn with the week’s winners every Friday!!!
Put me down for one more vote of:
Track the Caprice, or possibly take it to Moab, I’m down with either.
Daily the Cube, I could probably fit a few bags of mulch in the back of that box.
Torch the Mustang, it’s halfway there already anyways.
I was about to say this is the right but unpopular choice, but it looks like I’m less alone than I thought I would be.
In the early days Fridays were a four-way showdown between the 4 previous winners. I stopped doing that because it got boring writing about the same cars twice. That’s why I only do this on short weeks.
You should go back to TDB, but make it TDDB. “Track, daily, donate, burn”. Or add a different fourth option; maybe “track, daily, part out, burn”.
I’ve always enjoyed the TDB piece because it ends the week on a sort of championship showdown, and it gives more insight into why the winner of each day was chosen by the daily voters. If you miss a daily, you catch up on Friday.
A “Sophie’s Choice” dilemma makes for much better weekend reading and commenting than an extended “one or the other” article.
At least now I know why my favorite version of Shitbox Showdown is so rarely posted. I hadn’t realized it was only for short weeks.
et tu Brute?
Track the Caprice. It would be most entertaining.
Daily the Cube. It would be most entertaining.
Burn the Mustang. It would be… you get the picture. The SN95 never did it for me.
And enjoy Duran Duran. Although it’s a bummer there was never a 1980’s band named Gort.
Klaatu barada nikto
Oooof.
10 years ago I’d have dailied the cube, tracked the Mustang, and burned the chevy.
Now, knowing more about how detestable Nissans (especially their entry-level ones) can be, and with the cube being out of production for so long? I’ll probably daily the Ford, and flip a coin for tracking the caprice or cube, because driving a slow car fast can be loads of fun. The caprice has a lot of potential for track duty, but for commuting I need some reassurance of airbags and decent modern brakes.
Driving a big boat fast has an entertainment value all on it’s own.
Even without improving it – wallow through some corners – it’s got more grip than people realize.
Daily: Caprice Estate
Track: Mustang
Burn: Cube
Really, you could easily daily the Cube since there is nothing wrong with it, but the big Caprice has gravitas the little Nissan can’t touch.
daily, caprice, 4X8 drywall and plywood, no more than 10-12 sheets depending on thickness, ask me how I know.
track, caprice, it’ll almost hit 90 downhill!! ask me how I know.
burn, caprice, it’ll do this itself eventually, again, ask me how I know.
It really is a car that does it all.
I rocked an 89 Caprice estate in highschool. It was a pretty sick ride.
This is tough because the Mustang is the obvious track car of the bunch. It’s already beat to hell so stripping it out and adding go fast bits is a no brainer, but I really just kind of hate it and want to see it burn. Whereas I kind of like the other two cars, but I wouldn’t really want to track either of them. Arrrgh! This is making me think, which is a big ask on a Friday. Damn it Tucker, it had better have been an excellent show.
Anyhow:
Daily the big dumb wagon.
Track the shitshow ‘Stang.
Burn the completely inoffensive and it really doesn’t deserve this fate Cube.
That stick shift in the Nissan threw a wrench into my mental works. Here goes anyway:
Daily: Nissan
Track: Caprice
Burn: Mustang
That manual makes the limited number of ponies in the Nissan work better. The Caprice is an LS/6L80 swap away from being a stoplight terror. Besides, a manual in that boat is just wrong. Burn the Mustang since that interior is horrid and the rest of the car looks ready for eternal rest.
This is the correct answer.
obvious:
Daily: Caprice
Track: Mustang
Burn: Any Nissan or Stellantis vehicle
Daily the Caprice, track the Cube for comic value, and finish burning that skeezy Mustang. You can cover the seats but I guarantee the interior has a stench you will never be able to cover up.
I’m in the camp of daily the Nissan, track the Mustang, and use the Caprice as a tow pig. The Caprice would also have a role as a groovy road trip car.
Also, have fun at the Duran Duran concert tonight! (Did I get the points??)
Burn the ‘stang on principle. Lord do I dislike pistol grip shifters. And I can only imagine the stank of Mickey Dees and stale tobacco in there.
Track the wagon for laffs, and daily the one vaguely modern, functional car of the three.
This is tough, as the Cube would be the best commuter. The Mustang has the best aftermarket for a track car, and I don’t want to destroy a clean Caprice wagon. So, with my automotive heart, I’ll do the following:
Daily: Caprice
It offers a somewhat fuel efficient V8, enough comfort for highway and backroad cruises, and enough storage to haul my tools, groceries, and whatever else I need. I’m sure I could throw a hitch on it and I’d have my truck, sedan, and cruiser all in one.
Track: Mustang
As much fun it as it would be to build the Caprice, you’re tearing apart a classic for track usage. SN95 Mustangs are becoming the fox body of our time. It’s already beaten and banged, so no worries about ruining good paint or interior pieces. Rip out the seats, old carpet, and throw in a cage and a racing seat and we’re halfway there. Add to the plentiful options that exist for the Mustang, we can track this bad boy with great suspension, engine, and aero mods abound. Plus, I’m a sucker for the 4.6 exhaust.
Burn: Cube
This is hard, because the Nissan Cube is a great little commuter. Nissan’s answer to Scion’s xB with slightly better looks. The CVT on these was garbage, I’ve heard the manual makes it a tolerable drive. That being said, it doesn’t offer me as much space as the Caprice, nor does it have the support of the Mustang when it comes to go-fast parts. Sure you could swap it, build frankenstein parts, and be a 1-of-1 guy at the track; but that takes time and resources to ultimately end up with a worse Fiat 500 Abarth.
As soon as I saw the candidates, I was ready to swoop in and basically say, ‘I don’t care which other I track or daily—I just want to see that Cube burn!’ But, honestly, the ‘13 Cube which turned me against Nissan was just fine apart from the cvt, so I’d likely daily it and track the Mustang
It’s set up to be Track: Mustang, Daily: Cube, Burn: Caprice, but you don’t have to be contrarian to see reason to mix it up. I’m on-board with everyone’s idea of dragging the Caprice sleeper wagon, but if it’s a swervy track, I’d rather sit in the Cube. It’d take a flamethrower to clean the Mustang, so might as well burn it. The Caprice wouldn’t be a terrible DD, but if you left the Cube stock, just use it for double-duty.
Now that Fiat 500 doesn’t look so bad, eh? That’d be great fun on a track, maybe even tuned up a little.
Track – Mustang, Daily – Caprice, Burn – Cube
This is quite problematic. Just for the stupid giggles I’d want to set up the Cube for the track but may run afoul of the height vs. wheelbase rules in SCCA solo and the like.
I don’t think any of them deserve to burn but if one has to go it’s the Mustang. There’s plenty of them out there in better shape. I’ll figure out which of the Caprice and Cube that I’ll daily or track later.
I did see someone else suggest saving all three and using the Cube as the daily, the ‘Stang on the track and the Caprice as a tow pig. This is about as good a solution as any.
Track: Mustang
Daily: Cube
Burn: None of ’em. You’ll want a tow car for the track Mustang once you gutted the interior and a big old wagon is perfect for that role, so the Caprice is spared the flame.
Since I voted for the Peugeot, this is an easy one for me…
Track: Mustang
Daily: Cube
Burn: Caprice
The Caprice doesn’t deserve to be burned and the Mustang is a real hooptie, so maybe I could be talked into swapping the Caprice and Mustang, but the Caprice would only be good for drag and I believe tracks should turn (in both directions!), so I’ll stick with my original choices.
The logical track choice would be the Mustang but I’m going to mix it up and say burn that sucker, engine and suspension swap the Caprice and track that, and use the Cube as a little daily with space to haul said race parts! Nobody said these choices had to be smart.
Track: Mustang
Daily: Caprice
Burn: Cube
track: Caprice
daily: Cube
burn: Mustang
I still like my idea of a 2100+HP caprice on the funny car drag circuit
Track: Caprice
Daily: Caprice
Burn: Mustang…just wait for it…