We Need To Talk About The Ideal Placement Of The Oh-Shit Handle

The plight of the person in the passenger seat of a car is a tricky one. The experience is entirely dependent on the whims and skills of the driver, and there’s very little provided to the passenger to change that. Maybe they’ll have access to the radio, or climate controls, or center-stack infotainment screens, or, in the case of some fancy new cars, their own little touchscreens. But, fundamentally, those can’t help a passenger from the physical motions caused by a driver wanting to learn everything they can about oversteer on a wet road, or a driver that only glances out the windshield every few seconds, then yanks the wheel in a panic. For these situations, there’s really only one relatively consistently provided tool for the passenger: the Oh-Shit Handle (or OSH). These have been around for longer than you’d think, and there’s a few common designs and locations for them. Let’s talk about what may be best.

The Oh-Shit Handle (yes, I know some company trademarked that, but I’m not giving into that shameless commercialization), more formally known simply as a “Grab Handle” and less formally known as a Jesus Handle or Chicken Handle or some other similar sort of slightly demeaning name, seems to have a history that extends nearly as far back as the automobile itself, at least in some nascent forms.

Oh, and if you’re skeptical about the authenticity of the “grab handle” name, here’s a nice example from a 1970s Volkswagen Type 3 owner’s manual:

While it doesn’t appear to be present on the very first automobile, the 1769 Cugnot Steam Drag, there do seem to be some very early examples, depending on how generous we are with the definition of an Oh-Shit Handle.

For example, I think we could consider this seat railing on Sylvester Roper’s 1865 steam-powered Quadracycle a nascent form of an OSH:

Was it purposefully designed to give the passenger something to clutch for support as the vehicle drove? Probably, right? Or at least to keep various buttocks from sliding off sideways, but the idea of grabbing onto it for support almost certainly occurred, instinctively. I think we can think of this as a sort of Oh-Shit Handle, and it’s worth noting that this is a Civil War-era Oh-Shit Handle, and I suspect had many similar analogs on horse-drawn vehicles before it.

By the turn of the century, I think Oh-Shit-type handles were becoming not-uncommon on cars, usually in a location on the firewall/dashboard area, like on this 1902 Mors Type Z racing car:

I realize this example is sort of an odd one because there isn’t really a passenger seat, but it is a good picture of a fairly common type of grab handle, one that was in a sort of awkward location, but likely still welcomed, especially in a car as open as this. By the 1920s and 1930s, Oh-Shit Handles, often covered in rope for grip, were becoming more and more common, especially on sporting vehicles.

Over time, the Oh-Shit Handle ended up in a number of locations inside a car, but I think we can generally classify its most common locations into these four categories:

So, we have these four main types: Type 1 includes all dashboard or firewall-mounted handles, Type 2 is for any roof/over door-type handle, Type 3 is for handles mounted on the A-pillar or any sort of windshield-pillar mounted handle, most commonly found on larger trucks or SUVs, where they also can assist in entry and exit, and the Type 4 handles are a sort of catchall category that includes any handles mounted low, alongside the seat or on the transmission tunnel, that sort of thing.

Here’s some examples of each category:

VW has long been a fan of the Type 1 dashboard handle, though, ironically, they moved it from the Type 1 position on their Type 1 Sedan (Beetle) in 1973, moving it to the Type 2 position over the door.

Type 2s are by far the most common on contemporary cars. They sometimes flip down, and even Jeeps without tops use this location, with Oh-Shit Handles strapped to the roll bars.

These Type 3 ones, as I mentioned before, are most often found on high trucks and SUVs, because they do give you something to grab onto to get in and out.

The Type 4 category is perhaps the most varied, including such oddballs as the Subaru Brat’s in-bed-seat terror grips and also the purposeful-seeming handles found on sports cars like Porsches.

As for which of these handles does the best job, I think. that’s worthy of discussion. I’m pretty sure I’ve been a passenger in cars with all of these types of handles, and I think all have merits and downsides; the Type 2s can work as coat hangers if needed, and can be placed in the rear seats as well quite easily, something that’s not as readily do-able with the other categories.

The A-pillar ones have their dual uses and can be in a good location to grab if you’re, say, standing on a running board. The Type 4 ones I’ve encountered seem to show up on the most extreme sort of grab-handle duty, like on-track and off-road machines, which says a lot for their ability to keep a passenger calm and in place.

But what do you think? I feel like we need to discuss this, because, like all details of cars, it’s important, dammit.

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