Cars aren’t rational, which helps explain why automotive icks exist. You know, little turn-offs that make our skin crawl. A car could be perfection on four wheels but as soon as one of these icks shows up on it, you can never see it the same again. I’ll start things off by sharing one of my automotive icks, because it’s on an excellent car.
The Cadillac CT5-V Blackwing is spectacular. It’s a supercharged, manual, rear-wheel-drive love letter to the traditional super sedan, an encore for a classic recipe. It’ll break the 200 mph barrier, beat up on supercars of a decade ago around a track, and do it all with Cadillac luxury. It’s absolutely brilliant, but it also has a design element that I just can’t wrap my head around.
See, the CT5 has a swooping fastback greenhouse plucked from the fabulous Escala concept car. Not only does the roofline that comes with that make the car look lower than it is, it helps with visual length. Unfortunately, one big corner was cut with the shift to production, as the quarter window is entirely fake.
Yep, what looks like a piece of glass on the c-pillar is actually shiny black plastic that will acquire swirl marks and fingerprints like nobody’s business. What’s more, it means less light for rear seat passengers than if there was a window there, and potentially larger blind spots. It just feels so repugnantly cheap for a thing on a luxury car, especially when the current Honda Civic has a similar greenhouse treatment with real quarter windows.
So, what are your automotive icks? Whether styling elements that ruin cars for you or user interface choices that cause your eyebrow to twitch, let’s hear those turn-offs in the comments below.
Support our mission of championing car culture by becoming an Official Autopian Member.
Basically everything about modern cars, but to touch on something specific, return-to-centre shifters. A stupid, unintuitive design with absolutely no benefit over traditional shifters, that’s literally killed people because it’s confusing. My mother just got a GL550 with this asinine crap, and every time I drive it and have to get the front gate, I worry I’m gonna end up like Anton Yelchin.
The Lexus CT200h/fancy Prius has something like this. It’s, well, interesting but imo it’s better than shifters where it’s multiple weird and different buttons in a row (Example, 2018 Acura MDX: https://ibb.co/YcTGHH9 )
The non-fancy Prius also has the joystick shifter
My ‘12 BMW DCT has a monostable shifter. I don’t worry about it a bit. You have to press the button on the side (under your thumb) to put it into any gear. When the door is opened, it immediately shifts to park. Kinda annoying when you are trying to lean out and drive it onto ramps, but there you are. I figure my chances of ending up like Anton are less than nil. It does annoy me that I can’t put it in neutral with the engine off and push it out of the garage or line it up w/ the lift.
smh, don’t you guys have a chauffeur to do that for you?
I’ve had enough of Darth Vader Helmet grills.
Another thing about the CT5. Did you ever notice that the copilot seat is closer to the door than the driver’s seat? The passenger footwell was smaller too.
I don’t know the name for it, perhaps Adrian Clarke can give it a name, but the way the doors pinch in towards the bottom, then flare out into these sort of vestigial running boards, then two sets of rocker panels, the lower one is black, I guess go make the one that’s not black look like its the bottom of the car?. It just is so very ugly.
oh, and also the ridiculously large wheels with the ridiculously small sidewalls, which I sort of get that it’s a style thing and people are stupid and there’s some reason they think that’s a good idea, but then they put black plastic trim on the wheel opening that makes it look like the tire is actually undersized because visually it’s floating in all this black space. What’s that all about?
Floating roofs.
Plastic cladding.
Ginormous grilles.
Interior light strips.
Blacked out rockers and roofs.
Haptic touch for common functions.
+
Glass roofs
Rear door handles in the c-pillers
Floating stuck on screens
Dashboards and interiors festering with crevices and pointless shapes that are hard to keep clean
Side marker lights in the wheel arches where they are more vulnerable to damage
Goofy headlight and taillight shapes
Subscription based blinkers
…this is too easy
My dog threw up into my center console this weekend. My god, the nooks and crannies I have had to clean …
Side markers in the bumper are superior because they’re easier to swap out for clear/dark/body color to clean up the design
I get all the touch screen control hate and I agree but feel we’ve all beat that dead horse.
My biggest gripe is cars with 48-way power, heated, ventilated, massaging seats for the driver but the passenger only gets a 4-way, no-tilt, half assed attempt at a power seat.
You really can’t swap the control position on the driver seat and offer it as an option for the passenger? Charge for it, I’ll gladly pay.
I will buy cars that are so much more than I need because the lower cost ones don’t have this as an option.
Yes, looking at you Acura and Subaru.
On the upside, we are one step away from the driver’s seat featuring a bidet.
A fearless car writer explored an adjacent idea some years ago.
https://jalopnik.com/how-to-pee-in-your-car-and-keep-your-pants-dry-1658903998
At least they put some power in. My top spec GTI has 8-way power driver’s seat, but manual passenger seat… except for the seatback rake, that’s a nice and slow power adjustment. And why didn’t a $36k car in 2020 have power folding rear view mirrors?
Tall crossover-esque cars like the Ford Ecosport and the original Chevy Trax as well as its derivatives. Can we just bring back hatchbacks and wagons… please…
Come to Europe!
But don’t take too long as they are disappearing from here too… 🙁
Meh, the EcoSport has similar dimensions to the Ford Model A Fordor in terms of raw function and dimensions, it’s fine.
Similarly, the Miata RF does this and I hate it.
My rear passengers are always complaining about the lack of light back there.
(Maybe I should let them out of the trunk.)
1) Touch menus for stuff that should be buttons and knobs. Worst. Trend. Ever.
2) Unnecessary creases and fake vents
3) Angry or sour looking cars. I have enough of that attitude from humans, I like my cars happy and friendly
4) Big front overhangs. Where I live the curbs are tall, so I dread parking in 45 or 90. Also, it looks ugly.
5) Unnecessary badges. No one needs to know anything other than brand and (begrudgingly) model.
6) Submarine windows. I get safety has a hand in this, but seeing from my car is ALSO a safety feature.
7) Carpet and plastic everywhere, I miss metal in the interiors!
8) Bigger on the outside, smaller on the inside. Why are cars so big and so cramped at the same time?
Totally on board with 2 & 3.
Saved me the trouble of writing that myself.
I also dislike how small windows are, especially in hatchbacks and coupes. thing My 350z has a high beltline which makes the driver and passenger windows small (it doesn’t help that it’s a convertible as well.)
“5) Unnecessary badges. No one needs to know anything other than brand and (begrudgingly) model.”
In a world where people are dumb enough to buy ballcaps, t-shirts and even get tattoos to identify with a brand due to their own pathetic lack of self esteem, we are probably stuck with this. Everybody is a billboard now for a product, team or band (those are also products), but instead of being paid to do it they volunteer their own damn money.
> Everybody is a billboard now for a product, team or band
Band shirts, sports team hats and jerseys, and designer clothes with gaudy logos have been popular for over half a century.
I’m old. Half a century is my now!
I have a couple:
Tesla’s interior design. I don’t want to take my eyes off the road every time I want to turn on the AC or see how fast I am going. The latter could be solved with a HUD, but Tesla doesn’t offer one.
The aggressive styling of most modern cars. Why does my dad’s Corolla have to look like a Lambo? Why does every car these days seem to have a massive, ugly-ass grille that does nothing but ruin the lines? Even EV’s get the damn things, and they need a fraction of the cooling of an ICE car. Not to mention the boy racer strakes, headlights that look like a shrapnel wound, and the disconnect between the aerodynamic styling and the sharp design details.
Glossy interior elements … glare. GLARE! and figerprints and scratches (despite the fact that these cut down on glare).
Electronic releases (doors, fuel door, trunk, etc.) without manual backups.
Slapped on tablets.
Telematics.
Piano black is the WORST
My whole center console is essentially piano black. My solution was to keep a microfiber rag in the glove box and every now and then give a quick wipe. Unfortunately this also messes with the capacitive touch controls so I end up accidentally changing volume, climate, heated seats control, etc. during said wiping. Oh well, car is worth it.
Crossover utility vehicles. The BMW X6, the TeslaX, the Honda Crosstour, etc.
Steering wheels canted off to one side (Looking at you GM) as well ass off center steering wheels (relative to the driver’s position)
I tolerate Asymmetry, don’t push it.
It’s not hugely obvious, but my Mustang has a bit of this – it has Ford’s classic “canted to the left for your driving enjoyment” shifter that additionally has the rearward bend in it so it’s more easily reachable by normal people.
Shifters are easily swapped out if necessary, the same cannot be said for fixing steering wheel cant and or the steering wheel being off center relative to the driver.
Two, in order of annoyance:
The Toyota Echo is a perfect example of #2, and current Teslas combine both my icks into one vehicle!
The Echo was a cheap world-market car. The instrument cluster is in the middle so that Toyota only had to design and supply one dashboard for all markets.
Sadly, Tesla figured out the same trick with its lower-end cars, and they cost a lot more than any Echo ever did.
Oh I know WHY they did it, I just don’t like it.
Any active nannies, large touchscreens, bloated bodies, CUVs, and “angry” face design.
Pretty much this.
Glaring in the top shot. St Bernard eyes! GM does it a lot, and there are others.
Will any manufacturer offer a “Keep It Simple Stupid” car again? I think there are many that will not buy a connected car.
When a car with an aftermarket exhaust designed to add street credibility to whatever car it’s on is under hard acceleration, presumably to draw attention to it, shifts itself revealing that it has an automatic transmission or even worse is when its obvious that the driver “manually” shifted his slushbox. I just shake my head in disgust. I know autos are faster in most cases, but no one ever said, “cool, an automatic transmission”.
Definitely this. You arent alone.
I’ll say that an exception should be made for DSG boxes, they lighting shift so quick that it has a pretty cool exhaust note.
Doorhandles. The gray ones where they are built into the pillar. Pretty much any car from 2000-2012 has them. 1. They are really awkward to pull on. 2. They don’t look good.
I’ve got two:
1. The haphazardly placed infotainment systems where a screen is just thrown on the dash without trying to integrate it.
2. Angry face Jeeps. They look awful and when I lived in the south it was rare to see a Jeep without them. You’d think that’s how they came from the factory. And the drivers were generally aggressive a-holes. Funny enough when I moved back out west I hardly ever see them.
Sometimes I think I would have the most unique new Jeep ever if I did two things:
That would be one unique Jeep. It would be equally unique if you did install some off road mods and then had a few scratches, dings, and other telltale signs that you’ve actually used it off road.
Good point. Maybe a four-point list, then.
My uncle has a old 4banger YJ on the farm. Bone stock, except a hitch on the front so it can be towed by a tractor. Beaten, battered, but functional. That is a jeep to me.
If you neglected to cover the entire dash in rubber duckies, you’d be a goddamn pioneer.
Stupid plastic cladding to make cars look Off-Road. SUV’s, wagons, and hatchbacks that have sculped backs that destroy useful cargo space for the sake of appearances. Spare tires hanging from the back of the car. Snorkels on vehicles that will never see anything deeper than a rain-filled pot hole. Frameless windows on non-convertibles. Gaudy logos on cheapest model of luxury brands. Built-in vase in the New Beetle.
Imagine how wonderful the Mazda CX-30 would look if not for its dreadful cladding.
*Hides in the corner with my CX-30, covering its ears so it doesn’t feel bad about itself*
Fair point though, I think it looks good for what it is, but I do really dislike the cladding. and even more so the black wheels that are forced when you get the Turbo like I did.
That said, the cladding has stopped a surprising number of scratches and dings even though I’m extremely careful with my cars. Mazda paint is also some of the most chip-prone, thin nonsense in the industry, so I’ll take the trade-off since the car fits the rest of my needs perfectly, but man do I wish it didn’t have the cladding.
At least it looks great with the cladding! Black wheels however…
I’ve got some BBS wheels and fresh tires to go on soon to replace the OEM ones in a matching size, mercifully in a machined metal and light gray color that’ll look killer against the Polymetal Gray paint. I had to overlook the black wheels for the sake of the Turbo, 320 lb-ft of torque in that thing is way more than necessary, and I adore that engine dearly.
At least Mazda did some good styling work around the cladding, unlike some cars out there that use it as a crutch haha.
Haphazardly places keyholes in doors/trunks. Looking at you 00s-10s Ferraris!
Stick figure family window decals.
The only ones I’ve seen that I approve of are the two adults with a bag of money and the “I don’t care about your stupid stick figure family”.
I prefer the star wars version. “The Empire cares not for your stick figure family!”
My wife prefers her life cycle of a face hugger version.
Anything Fast N Furious-derived.
From the factory – the unfortunate Altezza-style clear taillight craze from the ’00s. Didn’t look good then and haven’t gotten any better with age.
Aftermarket – putting one of those rally-style shark’s teeth airflow smoothers on the roof of anything. Maybe people feel it’s the classy version of a giant aluminum spoiler to show you’re into living life a quarter mile at uh time?
Vortex generators.
I got stuck behind a Civic with them unevenly spaced across the top. I’m surprised I didn’t cause another wreck staring so intently at that one.
They came factory on my Evolution IX.
Screens. Screens. SCREENS. Screens instead of analog instruments. Touchscreens instead of controls. Screens instead of mirrors. The idea of having to go into a menu to open a glove box or turn the seat heaters on low-key infuriates me. Sometimes not so low-key.
Styling-wise, anything where the brand identity is comprised almost entirely of a giant grille.
Bumper stickers, especially the type that look like car badges. I’m enough of a geek I have to see the trim version or engine size of the car in front but don’t care about your personal views.
3D Number plates. Ugh!
What does 3D number plates mean, exactly?
It’s a British thing the lower orders have taken to. Black plastic raised letters and numerals basically, instead of a totally flat acrylic plate. If you see one it means the owner is a massive meat whistle and to be avoided at all costs.
This is interesting as license plates in the States used to all be stamped and then went to the cheaper flat plates. I personally miss the raised plates as they added character to them.
My state still has the stamped plates; the non-stamped ones look cheap to me.
I like the metal stamped plates. The new 3D ones are ugly black plastic letters on a plastic backplate.
My state used the cheaper flat plate in the mid 2000’s but switched back to stamped when they realized that when the plate fades or is dirty it is unrecognizable.
Brilliant description of both plate and owner!
Meat whistle? I must add this to my vocabulary. Not to my personal behavior.
I might spring it on my coworkers tomorrow. They’re so niave, getting their lols from stuff I heard decades ago.
Fake exhaust tips. Many cars are guilty of this, but especially glaring is the C300 a family member has. It has fake dual exhaust tips… hiding a real dual exhaust.
It’s better if you hide exhausts entirely.
You know the Miura has fake exhaust tips?
Great, now you have ruined the Miura for me 🙁
Esp. on 4 cylinder cars. I just saw a Dodge Dart (a car for which I have an odd soft spot) with the dual tips. It seems out of place with what’s obviously a small, economy-themed car.
Yeah my fiances Tourx has the stupid fax tips on the back and it just looks tacky the exhaust literally dumps right before it like either connect them and put real tips or just make it look sleek without the fake ones.