Cars aren’t rational, which helps explain why automotive icks exist. You know, little turn-offs that make our skin crawl. A car could be perfection on four wheels but as soon as one of these icks shows up on it, you can never see it the same again. I’ll start things off by sharing one of my automotive icks, because it’s on an excellent car.
The Cadillac CT5-V Blackwing is spectacular. It’s a supercharged, manual, rear-wheel-drive love letter to the traditional super sedan, an encore for a classic recipe. It’ll break the 200 mph barrier, beat up on supercars of a decade ago around a track, and do it all with Cadillac luxury. It’s absolutely brilliant, but it also has a design element that I just can’t wrap my head around.
See, the CT5 has a swooping fastback greenhouse plucked from the fabulous Escala concept car. Not only does the roofline that comes with that make the car look lower than it is, it helps with visual length. Unfortunately, one big corner was cut with the shift to production, as the quarter window is entirely fake.
Yep, what looks like a piece of glass on the c-pillar is actually shiny black plastic that will acquire swirl marks and fingerprints like nobody’s business. What’s more, it means less light for rear seat passengers than if there was a window there, and potentially larger blind spots. It just feels so repugnantly cheap for a thing on a luxury car, especially when the current Honda Civic has a similar greenhouse treatment with real quarter windows.
So, what are your automotive icks? Whether styling elements that ruin cars for you or user interface choices that cause your eyebrow to twitch, let’s hear those turn-offs in the comments below.
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The testicles hanging off the trailer hitch of a brodozer. (of any design or configuration, and no, 2 large nuts on a chain is not clever). What are you trying to say here? In comparison to the size of the vehicle, it’s not actually impressive. If you’re trying to attract attention about the size of part of your junk, you may actually be appealing to the wrong audience…just an observation.
My favorite thing to do is ziptie the Keychain version onto the hitch of a brodozer… blue ones of course. Seems more appropriate.
Another one comes to mind which is vinyl which I’ve ranted about before. I hate the stuff. I never understood how it’s considered an upgrade over cloth; it just looks and feels cheap.
And it’s making a comeback in mid-trim level cars too which means I’ll either be buying a base model or the fully loaded model to avoid the vinyl penalty. And I’ll lean towards the fully loaded model so maybe the auto makers are onto something with people like me.
I get that in some cases like in an off-road vehicle you’ll want vinyl over cloth so you can hose out the vehicle and such. But in that case I’d still get leather as it can be hosed off too.
I like how they’ve given it different names to avoid saying vinyl. Not that it doesn’t work…everyone used to hate polyester until they started calling it “microfiber;” now, people can’t get enough of it.
The term ‘Vegan leather’ makes me really cringe
I’ve been noticing that too! I recently bought a new pair of European motorcycle boots (many boots are Italian for some reason), and saw that in the specs…all I could think of was the conundrum of animal hides vs. petroleum-based textiles.
I mean, it’s just using animals with maaaaany extra steps
As I was reminded of tonight – the swoopy plastic wheel covers that companies feel necessary to put on the base model’s steel wheels.
You can see the wheels right though them and the effect is discordant…why not just produce a decent looking steel wheel (like the Bronco sport), then the covers wouldn’t be necessary/so off-putting?
Opel made the very clever move of making a 5 spoke steelie – not because it fits the looks of the cars they put it on, since with most modern Opels that isn’t the case, but because now they could make 5 spoke hubcaps and not have the steelie face visible underneath, creating a very pleasing visual result.
The facelifted first-gen Ford Fusion did this too! It was years before I realized they were actually plastic covers and not alloys. I’d absolutely be fine with steelies done like that.
I remember the steelies themselves were actually quite good looking.
GM North America also did that, and so did the gen. 3 Prius.
Alcantara. Looks cheap. Is cheap (it’s polyester fake suede, not unicorn skin). Gets dirty easily. Looks really gross when dirty. Hard to clean. Obviously, every automaker puts it everywhere in their performance car interiors. ICK.
I’ve experienced some instances of Alcantara that aren’t too offensive. It’s one of those things that seems good in theory when it’s new but with how nasty it’ll get I’d prefer to avoid it all together.
The obsession with clean cars, I don’t get why it matters that much to have perfectly clean cars. Just think about how much time and money that takes up. just park it outside in the rain is good enough.
Exceptions are fine if you have dirt which could increase aerodynamic drag or other foreign debris which could harm paint. But everyday I see people going into car washes with cars that look reasonably clean beforehand.
Hey, I keep the interior of my semi truck spotless! But I live there. The exterior though… bout every two weeks. By then it is a necessity because a squeegee won’t clean the bugs off at that point.
Oh interior I forgot, my mistake I only meant exterior. interiors are cheaper to clean, create less waste when cleaning and can get you sick if filled with rat nests.
Fair enough. And I hear you. I was picking up parts today and watched so many clean cars go into the car wash next door. Kinda stupid to me. I wash vehicles every 5000 miles. For my car that is twice a year. My semi, twice a month.
Uh… This is a weird take.
Black only interior options.
Agree. I will not buy a car with black interior. Pointlessly hot and makes the interior feel like a cave.
In the same vein as your ick, I fuckin hate the fake windows on the Miata RF. I love the car, but I just can’t deal with the fake windows.
I thought it was just me.
I don’t love them either, but I don’t know what else they could have done.
160 mph speedometers on non performance vehicles. 99% of the time I’m never approaching 80. That leaves half of the dial to never be utilized. Also, big ass tachometers on automatics. This ends up with the speedometer not being centered enough that the steering wheel blocks part of it making it difficult to quickly check the speed.
What vehicle did you drive that had a big ass tachometer?
Rented an Equinox a while back, and this Mercedes Metris I use for work.
Thanks, I wanted to see an example of a hideous dashboard and the Mercedes didn’t dissapoint.
The final gen Toyota Celica had an amazing example of looks-cool-but-was-near-impossible-to-read gauges. The font was this italic brushstroke-looking thing, and the speedo went to like 150, which meant that all the speeds that most of us would reach on a daily basis were crammed into 1/4 of the dial.
Huge Grilles – Particularly those which are half blanked out.
Fake black plastic vents – especially on rear bumpers, but also on fascias in lieu of bumpers.
Fake black plastic windows.
Black wheels.
Floating roofs – unless there’s actual glass in the void like the 1st & 2nd gen Mercury Sable sedan.
Angry, aggressive styling. What ever happened to smooth, sleek, happy cars?
Taking a nice hatchback or wagon – then lifting it and slapping on cheap plastic panels to make an Outback out of everything from a Mercedes-Benz wagon to a 911. It’s been done – it’s awful – Just stop it.
Dial-a-gear and push-button drive selectors. There’s nothing wrong with a nice lever on the console or a stalk/lever on the column.
Carbon Fiber and fake Aluminum. I prefer the original carbon fiber – it’s called “wood”
Thank you for saving me from having to write all of that. ????
Yes! Black wheels are hideous.
Floating roofs is a good one. They look cool in artist renderings but once they hit production they just look awful. Maybe if we had the tech to actually have a full pane of glass for support instead of humungous pillars they might look cool on a production vehicle.
Mercury did it in the 80’s – it just took two thin support pillars over which a glass panel was flush-mounted.
My ’10 Focus has a fake aluminum center console – it’s just silver-color plastic. The whole thing is so cheesy. But I do enjoy it b/c it unabashedly goes there.
But how else will all those wagons get to the store and to pick up little Timmy after school? They need to be lifted and have all terrains or they wouldn’t be able to get anywhere haha. In all serious though I think a lot of those wagons have went for the more lifted look because people don’t want to be associated with driving a wagon anymore as those used the to be family haulers before they were replaced by minivans which have been replaced by crossovers. Like anytime I see an outback I don’t even think wagon anymore I think crossover (or as most non car people will call them SUV’s)
In my opinion, real carbon fiber and aluminum have their place, but the fake variety of either is tacky as hell.
Real aluminum definitely has it’s place – It can be made quite beautiful with proper finishing.
And Carbon Fiber is an amazing material – but it’s not pretty and it’s useless as a finishing material.
Canted steering wheels/Steering wheels that are not centered on the driver’s seat.
Window openings that are too high to comfortably rest my arm on.
Glass sunroofs. Why make it hotter?
Touch screens.
Sport suspension on a non-sports car.
And the big one: limo tinted front windows and windshield – for safety reasons, I need to see that you see me. And by the way, I know your front windows are only tinted so you can smoke weed in your car. How do I know this? I asked my dopey friend. Me: “Why are your front windows tinted?” Dopey Friend: “So the police can’t see me smoking my special.”
It’s also so I can pick my nose in peace.
Comically oversized exhaust tips on Brodozers. Son, you don’t have a locomotive engine under that hood, stop trying.
The lack of symmetry from the exterior rear view of the Nissan Cube.
No other car’s appearance truly irks me the same way.
Hard to describe but basically the idea that the weak cars get the “help” from practices that should be instead offered for already proficient cars to make them great.
For instance, until recently pretty much no car was able to be built from Aluminum. If we had done this for regular commuter cars in the 90s it would have given us nearly 40-50mpg vehicles two decades earlier.
But those vehicles “didnt need the help”, so they never got it. Until a fat overweight EV needed to be made with ultra heavy batteries…. *then* the aluminum comes out.
Another example is the fancy electric turbochargers. Cant put them on the boy racer cars that want them, nope they appear on fat VW SUVs and BMW SUVs because those vehicles “needed help”.
2.0 that has a closed deck block and 450-500hp stock sized turbocharger? Only comes in a high end Mercedes with an auto where the owners dont even want a four cylinder. WRX still has a crappy sub 300hp engine and those owners would be chomping at the bit for a stock 400hp+ edition “ but they dont need it”.
Its like a strange version of inequality but with automotive engineering resources being spent only where something weak is brought up to snuff, those resources can never make the strong, better.
So boy racer cars in 2024 have 270hp lag city four cylinders and fat SUVs are made with 500hp Aluminum and electric turbocharging.
Oh! Oh! I know. When automakers call something “coupe” and you look at it and it has rear doors*. Especially when it’s an SUV to boot.
They’re not coupes. Stop saying they are. I usually hate the cars too since usually this just consists of taking a pointless, clumsy SUV and making it even more so – but even if chopping rear headroom away does net you better looks, for lovemaking’s sake, find another damn word to market them.
*This does not include cars like the RX-8. Whether I agree or not that calling them coupes is accurate, doing so doesn’t actively anger me.
The RX-8 just had a different solution to get bodies into the back seat. Definitely a coupe. The abominations out now… When VW had their CC out, that was kinda cool, but now things are ridiculous and as a tall human, I can’t comprehend 4 door coupes. Now… if it was a Maxima, 4DSC meant it was a 4 door sports car, which is certainly okay with a sedan body.
Good one. Esp. since it’s falsely trading on an ethos of style and/or sport, an ethos that few people actually want, judging by they end up buying.
Exactly. Sleek sportiness is so diametrically opposed to SUVdom that the more you go in that direction the less of an SUV you’ve got. And ultimately, if you are so eager to get something that seeks to be the opposite of an SUV, you don’t want an SUV, and don’t have the guts to admit that to yourself. After all, if you really wanted an SUV, why wouldn’t you want something that owns it?
Modern head units in classic cars.
Frankly, most pre-“we’ll just make a screen” stereos just look bad full stop, and it already kills me that people will spend triple digits on a chrome ring and then address the most prominent component in the whole dash by grabbing the first rainbow-lit chrome pastiche their mall says has Bluetooth.
But at least in ’00s cars they, if not fit in, make visual sense. In classic cars those feel like a dubstep-blaring speaker in the middle of a hiking trail. And yet you’ll see the very period correct policemen who’ll whine about the proper shift knob for their year of Alfa bless their pride and joy with what looks like a crushed BlackBerry using a Mario Kart star! It will never cease to bewilder and disappoint me.
So please, people, hear my plea: just look into somewhat period correct head units. I promise that, between Bluetooth-adapting cassettes, units with auxiliary audio input, CD changer ports you can fit with adapters that respond to head unit controls, and outright mods and remakes of old stereos, you will find a way to get the functionalities you want in a package that actually enhances the look of your interior. And it will cost less than that fancy horn button you’re looking at.
I’ve never gotten as-good audio from Bluetooth auxiliary doodads, cassette adapters, or radio transmitters as much as just replacing the entire head unit.
Function over form!
Not saying head unit quality is not a factor, just saying that one can find it in the higher end of the same era instead of turning to Walmart.
Heck, even with a replaced head unit, I’d say Bluetooth didn’t stop sounding appreciably worse until the AptX profile was implemented. But that vs a tape adapter with the constant slowly loping hiss of the eccentricities in the shape of the metal coil… I dunno which is worse. At least the tape adapter didn’t fail pairing for no apparent reason.
Could you please elaborate on that hiss? I’ve never had the occasion to use a tape adapter -just heard many a good thing about them- so I’ve never experienced it, and am not sure where that hiss would be coming from since as far as I got it the signal path just becomes an overcomplicated cable.
Without doing any research at all, I’m pretty sure it comes from the metal “tape” scrubbing across the read head. It’s kind of like dead space on a vinyl record – there’s not audio, per se, but there is definitely sound. It’s a midrange frequency, so it’s not terribly annoying in itself, but it’s definitely terrible for audio quality. The signal path contains a moving electromechanical linkage at one point.
In theory, though, it shouldn’t be scrubbing – it’s just two tapeheads pressed against each other. I don’t consider it impossible that there could be movement between the two with all the vibrations involved in driving, but I don’t see how that could cause audible looping.
This drove me NUTS when I was looking for a replacement HU for my ’95 Miata. (Not exactly classic, but same basic idea) I finally settled on a subdued Kenwood Bluetooth unit that had the option to match the display color to the dash illumination. If someone (other than Porsche) came up with a decent 80’s-90’s style replacement HU it would sell like crazy.
Blaupunkt has, and indeed they seem to!
I went with a Pioneer head unit that could match the orange of the illumination of the instrument panel on my Matrix. It’s a really nice feature, so much better than a derpy animation of cars or rockets or whatever on the screen in bright blue.
I’m not interested in upgrading my stock one, but DAMN the Porsche one looks good.
I completely agree with this!
I was very conscious of this exact thing in my 1991 Jeep Grand Wagoneer. I had tried multiple aftermarket head units, but none of them looked quite right.
I ended up with a factory head unit that I wired a hidden aux input into, then added a Bluetooth module. This is all then running through an amplifier hidden under the dash.
Looks 100% original, and sounds pretty good.
Fake carbon fibre, either interior trim or fake hoods/spoilers and crap.
I had some horribly fake trim pieces on the dash in my levorg, and it annoyed me so badly that I actually removed them and sent them to be covered in aluminium looking vinyl instead.
Is saying “most of modern gm, subaru, nissan/infiniti, kia/Hyundai Toyota/Lexus, and honda/acura design” too broad?
If not, then that. Stop with the big grilles and headlamps that make the vehicle appear to constipated (or worse). Stop with dumb taillights that don’t make proper use of their size and shape (and extra fail points if they’re in the bumper area). Stop with half-ass ergonomics. Stop with “floating” roofs. Stop with black roofs (let’s make the cabin even HOTTER in sunlight! Brilliant!).
There are many examples of automotive design done right: it’s not hard to take inspiration from such examples without copying, and without going the opposite direction into the land of pure lunacy.
If so, then, um… Oh! Any vehicle that doesn’t use amber turn signals, dammit.
“Hell no,” automakers reply, “because ‘Angry Catfish’ sells so well!”
Hey! My ’06 Matrix has a majestic floating roof! and wraparound rear glass!
I understand automakers wanting to lower their headlight height, but turn signals in the rear bumper is an awful design decision. Designers should be shown picture after picture of Camry bumper dents, Clockwork Orange style.
Large grille openings are a pox. We have to put stupidly large license plates across them, so give us a decent sized bumper bar and be somewhat creative rather than embiggen the grille.
The Matrix at least does the floating roof “right” in that it just uses blackout panels on the pillars alone, not the body itself (see Nissan, jeep, and Toyota’s recent half-ass attempts for comparison).
I’d actually contend that the Matrix uses the faux-floating roof, in contrast to a full-floating roof a la Range Rover, Mini Cooper, Ford Flex, etc. Not sure what you call it when the vehicle has one body-color painted pillar that extends to the roof but the rest are blacked-out. Balcony roof? Flying roof?
Wrap-around glass is great, more cars should have that.
The CVT. Ick!
Are you including the Prius eCVT and similar in that?
They’re fantastic and reliable.
I have a ct200h. The CVTs used in the Cts and the Priuses are definitely reliable, unlike those junk ones Nissan made. CVTs really boil down to personal preferences – I don’t find them particularly fantastic in terms of driving characteristics but some people do.
Along w/ CVTs, dry clutch DCTs as used in Kia’s and Fords.
Yeah, but eCVTs are nothing like CVTs.
Don’t they achieve the same goal of keeping you in the power band, regardless of their mechanical differences?
Grouping eCVTs with CVTs doesn’t feel great, but grouping eCVTs with other transmissions feels even worse, and I feel a need to get clarification when someone says they hate CVTs as a whole.
Yeah my dad is looking for a new car since he killed his sonic trying to do the timing belt (he rushed the job and forgot something somewhere it was not supposed to be before starting it.) and I have told him to steer clear of cars with CVTs and also timing belts because well yeah haha.
Oh dear.
Giant fucking trucks ick me. You need a big truck for work, go for it imo. Its a tool. Most of you are driving your brodozer to the grocery store. No way you can see your local old man, me, hobbling around. You don’t need 3 tons of vehicle or the related expense to get a carton of milk and a loaf of bread, or to drive to Applebees or your shitty job.
As a truck driver, I have to agree with you. I have to put up with difficult to drive vehicle for a job. I have no idea why people want a impractical vehicle for a daily driver. And most of them have nothing in the bed, and no scratches in it. Hell, my personal vehicle is a Yaris, because after driving a gigantic monstrosity all week, when I go somewhere fir personal reasons, I want something fleet of foot, easy to maneuver, and can be thrown at a parking spot and still be between the lines.
Chromed plastic bits on the dash or center console. When the sun is at a certain angle, it reflects off the chrome right into your eyes. Standard sunglasses don’t help, because the light os coming from below, so it gets between your face and the frame straight into your eyes.
All chromed plastic needs to die. It cracks and breaks and turns into sharp metallic blades. It’s especially dumb on high-touch areas, like door handles and shift levers. Arrrrgh!
A thousand times, this! And I’ll add any other reflective areas on top of that. I love my new Maverick, but one of the hood creases just beams the sun into my eyes sometimes, and I have to remind myself that it wouldn’t be smart to attack it with flat black paint.
I wonder if this is why Ford is so open about hood graphic appliqué accessories for Maverick.
It would make sense!
This is why I wear Heatwave Visual Lazer Face sunglasses. They’re terminator style so it’s a distinctive look, but they cover basically 98% of my field of view.
(Not affiliated with the company. They’re a small-ish business and I just like them)
I wear Julbos with the little side guards for medical reasons, and they work well for errant reflections.
https://julbo.us/products/shield
You can get them in black with black smoke lenses, so you don’t have to look like Scott the older GenX with the Oakleys on the back of his neck as he descends from his lifted Raptor to yell at immigrants.
Belt driven oil pumps.
I was so excited by the new 3L Duramax I6. I was even optioning out the dream Sierra I wanted to get to pull a small camper trailer for the wife and I. Then, I saw an engineering teardown of the engine where they showed the belt driven oil pump. Killed any enthusiasm I had. I’ll stick with the gas V8.
Huh??? Who would be so insane as to do that?? GM, WHY?! Although, I guess they *could* have come up with a less-reliable solution; I just can’t think of what that would be…
Wheel driven oil pump, you better keep moving or else.
Ha! We could go with a hand pump in the center console as a backup. Put it next to the e-brake, and make it look *almost* the same.
Piano black everywhere. First it took over the interiors of cars, now it’s taking over the exterior! Look at a new BMW and you can find it everywhere in all the most scratch prone locations.
I had to get decorative trim pieces in my wife’s CX5 because all of the piano black looked like absolute dog shite with all the scratches and fingerprints.
I feel like it’s the fake wood trim of our time. Which makes me wonder if we’ll be nostalgic for it eventually.
Rear blinkers that sit lower than the top of the bumper.
I am looking at YOU, Kia.
Any primary function lamp that is at or below bumper height should be forbidden. Head, tail, brake, signal, maybe even reverse. License plate and fog lights are OK of course.
1). Climate controls in the infotainment system. It’s just so goddamn stupid and counterintuitive.
2). GRAY! ENOUGH FUCKING GRAY CARS! Jesus Christ…EVERYONE has a primer gray and some manufacturers literally have multiple shades of gray. I’ve seen vaguely blue gray, vaguely green gray, metallic gray, matte gray, gray verging on black, and an assortment of others.
I am absolutely judging you if you buy a gray car. It’s a stupid trend that’s going to fade out of existence eventually…but since EVERY NPC JUST HAS TO HAVE A GRAY CAR real colors are fading from the market rapidly. There are tons of cars now that you can only get in white, black, or an assortment of grays. I’ve had enough of it. Grow up and learn how to deal with real colors, you rubes. Every fucking primer gray car sold is taking vibrantly colored cars off the road.
…and before someone brings up the fact that I have a black car, I wouldn’t if I had actual options. But my car only came in white, red, black, and vaguely blue gray. I’ve considered wrapping it in the N division’s performance blue. Maybe I will.
3). Angry eyes on Jeep Wranglers. Tell me you peaked in high school without telling me you peaked in high school.
4). Up badging. I see soooooo many fake Civic Type Rs and V6 Chargers/Challengers cosplaying as Hellcats. Anyone who knows anything about cars knows you’re faking it. It’s embarrassing. You’re convincing no one. Just own what you drive. If you have to up badge it to feel good then you picked the wrong car.
5). Black wheels. See my comments on gray cars.
I feel similar but not as strongly about when people de-badge their cars. To go to all that trouble to remove something the car was born with seems excessive and like you’re trying to pretend you’re in a video game or something.
In Germany its a small (and universally available) upcharge to have the car come with ONLY the brand badges on the front and rear.
Don’t want to appear gauche for driving an overpowered AMG E class instead of a plain taxi grade E? Only the cognoseti will know by the subtle appearnce differences.
But subtletly and discretion are not the ‘Merican way, so if you want to excercise the same option, time to get out the hair dryer and fishing line.
Often you’ll see a 320i being debadged so nobody knows that you could only afford the bottom of the barrel BMW. It’s very opposite from Germany, unless someone is going stealth to embarrass people at stop lights. Which is loser behavior anyways.
…I would prefer colorful cars too, but I dislike white and black more than I dislike grey.
I feel like grey “threads the needle” between the best and worst aspects of black or white (re: showing dirt).
Living in essentially a man made non-desert with a million other people, gray and light tan are amazing for not having to constantly wash the car. Black (or dark colors) here have a clean look for about 24 hours year round. That’s it, then it looks unkept and ignored. The dark colors show every scratch and ding as well as being hotter than absolute hell after a day of sitting in uncovered parking four months out of the year (like my 300 car hospital parking lot in which a mini cannot fully open a door).
Do not care about having a boring colored appliance vehicle and anyone that does is welcome to come wash my car every other day. I’ll take gray, white or tan over the disaster dark colors for the dailies. The toys that don’t sit out all day can be fun colors. If you have the means to have have them washed every couple days, more power to you; I’d rather buy more car than waste the water and money on keeping up untenable colors.
I absolutely loathe the Cro-Magnon Jeep grilles. It’s like they’re posturing as being angry and menacing because they actually feel weak and insecure, and feel like they need to mask it.
Meanwhile, somewhere in the world, is a jeep with a happy face. I love it so much. I wanna hug it and squeeze it and call it George…
https://wranglertjforum.com/threads/happy-jk.10932/
This seems like it should be a good seller, but I doubt it would do well here. Until the yellow smiley face with the 5 o’clock shadow comes back, anyway…
Smily face jeep with 5 o’clock shadow? THAT SOUNDS AWESOME!!!
These used to be everywhere!
https://images.app.goo.gl/PmBqJiCDxSoCat8j9
Could you imagine a jeep grill like that? Painted yellow, smiley grill, scruffy? I want it!
My one exception to the upbadging would be the blatantly ridiculous ones. E.g., a civic AMG, or a corolla with a lambo badge. I find myself giving a chuckle, not knowing if it’s cringe-based or true amusement.
1) most aftermarket wheels (a small percentage look good)
2) anything fake (air scoops, exhaust tips, badges, etc.)
3) many non-period correct cosmetic modifications
4) angry face Jeep grills
5) low profile mud-terrains
6) lifted 2wd trucks
7) hood/ grill bras
Do you consider actual Prerunners as lifted 2wd Trucks or are they exempt?
Prerunners are definitely exempt!
Thank you for the clarification.