Hello again! It’s still me: Stuart, a licensed insurance agent and internet company guy. I’m back with our final installment (at least for now!) in our partnership with The Autopian. And to round things out (for now!), we thought we’d have some fun with insurance. Didn’t think that was possible? I get it! But there is one tried-and-true game that people love when it comes to insurance: What crazy situations are insurable?
[Ed note: This is a “partner post,” wherein we have a sponsor of the site post about what they do. Marble is a great partner and you should sign up for Marble, which is a useful tool that allows you to track your policies, and rewards you for doing so. Plus, Marble helps support the site. Read their previous posts here and here. – MH]
A quick note before we go too much further though: By the very nature of these being insane hypotheticals, it’s hard to come down confidently on a particularly “right” answer. For that reason, I’ve enlisted the help of my colleagues and fellow agents Jordan and Brett, and together we’ll give you our collective best guesses at how an insurance company might respond to these far-fetched claims.
So let’s dive in!
Situation #1: The Dog And The Jeep
Situation: I like my neighbor’s dog a lot more than my neighbor. So whenever I see my neighbor’s dog, I like to come out and wave (I do NOT wave to my neighbor). The other day I saw my neighbor’s dog come out of the house, and I decided to say hello. Before I could, though, the dog was off like a shot, running towards my neighbor’s 1996 Jeep Grand Cherokee.
My moron neighbor left the door open! And the keys in the ignition! Before I can stop him, the dog — my only friend in the world — has started the car and accelerated! Right into the tree between our properties (that it’s really my neighbor’s job to trim). Thankfully, after the crash, the dog jumps out unharmed. But I’m left wondering: Will insurance cover anything for my neighbor?
Insurance: Bad news for my stupid neighbor but good news for me: He’s probably out of luck on the insurance! An insurance adjuster is going to have a LOT of questions about the negligent circumstances that allowed that (perfect) dog to start the car and drive it into a tree. And unless my neighbor is prepared to sue his dog, it’s unlikely that a liability claim will have much success. Insurance verdict is: Do not let your dog drive your car, even if he asks nicely!
Situation #2: The Fiat And The Rhino
Situation: It’s a Tuesday at 11:30 AM, and work is slow. No emails, no calls on the calendar, and it looks like I have some “me” time. You know what that means? That’s right — it’s time to head to the local drive-thru safari! It’s not quiet-quitting. It’s quiet-learning-about-wildlife.
I pull in and pay admission. My 1962 Fiat 500 Jolly is the perfect car for this! Plenty of sun protection and easy access to feed the giraffes. This is going to be a great Tuesday afternoon.
Making my way into the park, I take the first turn and come face to face with a mature rhinoceros. Delightful! Unfortunately the grin slides from my face as the rhino turns to me and lowers his head. That rhino weighs about 7 times my precious yet impractical Fiat! He charges me and much to his satisfaction, crunches the front hood of my car. As I limp home, I worry: will insurance cover any of this?
Insurance: This was a topic that the Marble agent team actively debated for some time, and we have some real advice if you find yourself being charged by a wild animal at a drive-thru safari: Throw that sucker (your car) in park ASAP. If your car is in park, then the damage will likely be classified as comprehensive (so the real take-away here: make sure you have comprehensive coverage!). Plus, the deductible for comprehensive claims is usually lower, so that’s less out of pocket for you. Also it won’t count as a moving accident, which will keep your claim history clean! So just keep this rhyme in mind: “If it’s a rhino you see, in park you should be.”
Situation #3: The Boy And The Monster Buick Wagon
Situation: Help! My son thinks every car is a monster truck! Since he was just a small boy he has pointed at every four-wheeled vehicle and exclaimed “Monster Truck!” No amount of correction will get through to him. He is otherwise a normal, perfect boy.
Until today. Today he took his first solo drive after getting his license. As I watched him pull out of the driveway in my cherished ’76 Buick Estate Wagon, my heart swelled with pride. But it didn’t last long.
A few short minutes later, I got a call and immediately rushed to a nearby intersection. There had been an accident! My son was fine but every single engine mounting in the Buick has broken. And when I looked at the security footage I saw what happened. My cursed son had mistaken the Buick for a monster truck and tried to roar through the intersection, clearly very intentionally crushing the cars in his way, and shattering the engine in the process. What is going to happen with my insurance?
Insurance: Not much is gonna happen with your insurance (assuming your son has even been properly added to your policy), because the company will see that your son was intentionally acting like a monster truck driver, and then they’ll claim negligence and you’ll be out of luck! Teach your son what isn’t a monster truck! C’mon!
This partner post was sponsored by Marble, the first and only all-in-one insurance management and rewards platform. Organize all your policies, earn rewards, and take control of your risk today. It’s fast, free, and helps put your insurance on autopilot. Plus, signing up helps support The Autopian.
Didnt we see this months ago? I think so because i was just able to log in and i apparently made several brilliant comments.
Sorry but unless there is actual footage of the dog doing a joy ride, there is no case.
Seriously when I was about 8 our 120lb standard poodle knocked my Mom’s VW Bus out of gear as well as released the parking brake in the parking lot at the country club. We were all watching cause we’d left the pool to see what asshole was blowing their car horn non stop for 10 minutes. Of course it was the damn dog.
My Mom’s bus rolled backwards about 20 feet into a Mercedes bumper. No harm, no foul.
A week later we got a letter from the club that said Alex was no longer welcome and his membership was permantently suspended. True story.
Hey if the dog honked the horn for 20 minutes you cant blame him. Mom was taking mothers little helper? What a drag it is getting old. I am surprised Alex was even accepted, driving a VW BUS.
If I drove my Fiat Jolly into a safari park, I’d be more concerned about the tigers than the rhinos.
This is hilarious. You guys are knocking it out of the park with this site.So many interesting and varied articles!
I was once passenger when a deer, after paralleling us for a few yards, took a hard left and came directly at me. She dented the passenger fender right behind the front wheel, and the front of the door, too. She bounced off the car, half-rolled when she hit the ground, and bolted.
We beat the fender out. No point in turning it in as it was hit and run
https://yt3.googleusercontent.com/TsHkJr4QgFeHMgPqHqr5Zp-zUEX89_JvGGF7aGbq_Tp3xduhLq1yIuARZ8vW5caadySBfegnprM=s900-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj
Thanks!
I just sent a screenshot of that to my bil who was driving at the time
A mate of mine was driving his gf’s car one night, and managed to spot some deer about to cross the road in good time, so he managed to stop before he hit them. However, one deer was really spooked and managed to run into the side of the car hard enough to damage the door and front wing, before flipping oven and landing on the bonnet and windscreen, denting/smashing both. IIRC his gf just scrapped the car, as it needed too much work to fix up.
To add insult to injury, by the time he’d limped the car home, then gone back to the crash site in his Landrover, someone else had already come past and picked up the remains of the deer. No venison for him!
Isn’t that an act of Dog ?
Back in the late 80s I parked my company car on busy Oxford St in Sydney late one night to go clubbing. When I staggered back to the car several hours later, I found the rear window shattered, the trunk crushed and a pool of blood behind the car. Apparently (as a shopkeeper later told me) someone had tried crossing the street without looking and been thrown so high into the air by a fast moving vehicle that when the body came down, it destroyed the rear of my car. There was no note, nothing, just a pool of blood. Try explaining that to your insurance company. Luckily, being a company car, it was not my problem.”Yes sir” I said to my boss, “a dead body damaged my car”.
I drove my Mini into the middle of a Stanley Cup riot back then the adjuster asked why I drove into the middle, I explained that it was the first time we won the cup and I didn’t follow hockey he was later concerned about my masters thesis on Soviet agricultural economics but I got my cheque
A fun local one is a few months ago there was a landslide completely blocking access to Mt St Helens’s west side (Johnston Ridge) and the 8 cars that were there are now stuck for a year until they fix the road and insurance won’t do anything about it because the cars are undamaged
Why in the world do people drive their cars through safari parks? I’ve seen too many videos that don’t end well.
https://youtu.be/n0q_bd97b9M
Is this covered
Good idea for a column but crazy actual situations would have beeb better.
I’m having a hard time picturing the Venn diagram of moderate republicans and FIATs, but your picture is pretty good.
Well moderate republican here actually registered independent just bought a 78 Fiat 124 spider because i am not wasting enough money.
I don’t mean this disparagingly, but now I need to know how a republican in name only mounts their spider. 😉
Nice!
-just wish it hadn’t taken me so long to catch on
Well still getting it running but hopefully can mount ir soon. Trying to get working and lose weight to fit. You have seen fat man in a little coat? I need to videotape fat man in a little car.
Are there any moderate republicans left?
Not really, because if you vote for a republican you’re supporting extremist and deeply anti-american policies that are far from moderate. I guess you could hold moderate conservative views and simply not vote?
Situation #1: But if my neighbor had an umbrella policy would that have covered it? Glad the dog’s okay.
Or homeoeners.
That rhino is having a Jolly good time.
You Autopian folks constantly amaze me. I never expected a subject like insurance to be so entertaining.
I know it’s meant to be lighthearted, but the rhinoceros situation piqued my curiosity. If I were to be stopped at a red light with a distracted driver approaching from behind me, would it be in my best interest to hurry up and shift into Park before he crashes into me? Is the advice here specific for the safari park where finding fault may be more challenging than on a public road?
No.
Shifting into park won’t likely do anything in either circumstance, as far as insurance is concerned. The rhino will be comprehensive (probably even if you strike it–most insurance policies I have known consider animal strikes under comprehensive regardless) and the rear-ender will be at fault for striking a vehicle stopped at a red light.
That, of course, assumes that you do have comp, and not just liability.
Sure. If you only have liability, you generally cover repairs to your vehicle except when someone else is at fault. The rhino, as an animal, isn’t legally at fault, but a hazard that caused the damage.
FYI, IMHO, all three answers are just plain wrong.
1) It’s not negligent to have keys in a car or have a door open. Also, unless your policy specifically excludes dogs driving, it’s covered.
2) It’s not going to matter if you jam that sucker into park. Doing so intentionally might even be considered insurance fraud. I would not want to test this theory in court. This is the most ambiguous one of the three postulates, but I doubt any insurance company would try to claim a rhino attack as a collision in the first place.
3) Intentional collisions happen all the time and they are covered (see road rage and fraud). Mental health incidents are not negligence.
Yes, I’m a dick for disagreeing with Stewart, but I honestly believe he is wrong. I want to be supportive, but every one of his interpretations seems to ascribe final authority to insurance companies, which is just ridiculous (see Department of Insurance in your state).
I largely agree.
For 1, I think the bigger concern is proving that the dog did it, which may be difficult. “Suuure your dog hopped in, started the car, and crashed it. Did anyone see this? Do you have cameras? Can we drug test you?”
For 2, my experience is that insurance companies consider most animal strikes to be comprehensive, even with the car in motion. I am drawing from experience in WA and ID, so I am certainly willing to entertain the idea that some states may regulate their insurance differently, but they are two very different states when it comes to regulation. I don’t know that putting the car in park would be fraud, but who knows.
3 seems likely to make your kid nearly uninsurable (and possibly include criminal charges). I can’t speak to whether the insurance would cover the damage. I would expect the insurance would cover it, but might come after the kid to recover the money if they can.
I agree with you except for #1. The story was told by the neighbor who witnessed the occurrence. A unbiased 3rd party who can testify to the dog doing it. However dogs dont have opposable thumbs and are most likely unable to turn a key. However left running probably negligent. But fob start the dog grabbed the fob ran out the door and into the jeep, autostart, hit the gear selector, happens all the time, accident with independent witness now covred?
Dog’s can’t turn a key, but if the vehicle has push-button start, then this starts to become real!
Or as mentioned fob start
I did once see insurance mechanically total a car when the owner swore up and down that the car broke when their dog jumped on the park button while in motion. One of the few times I’ve seen the endangered species that is the insurance adjustor visit in person.
One reason why having a commercial dog seat or tether is a good idea. Why should a dog roam free in your car? Yes, it’s cute an convenient, but don’t tell me it’s not at least a distraction. (I am not taking a firm stance here, but pointing out that dogs have been getting a free pass on seatbelts.)
Question. If a bear breaks into my car and literally tears the heck out of it, while being parked in my driveway. Is it covered by auto or homeowner’s insurance? Also do I get to keep the money from YouTube views or does the insurance get it?
The damage to your car would be auto insurance, the damages to anything in the car would be home.
This is *a thing* in certain parts of the country where bears and Subarus are in close proximity. It is covered under auto insurance
Suppose the owner said yes; would that make the dog an authorized user of the vehicle? And would that affect the outcome? 🙂
Did the dog pass all appropriate licensing tests? (The written might be more impressive than the driving test in this instance.)
Either way it’s pretty ruff.
“Shift to Bark”
My dog is licensed, but it’s evidently the wrong license. That’s okay, he’s too easily distracted by squirrels and deer, anyway.
Well allowing an unlicensed driver would be negligent, but if the car had a valid license probably covered. But does your state issue DLs to dogs? And if so is the age listed in human years or dog years?
What about a car rental where the contract was signed with a pawprint? This particular situation might not necessarily be applicable since Snoopy was rear-ended and so not at fault, rude gestures notwithstanding:
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/d5/e6/e7/d5e6e73509533e3cc5da361fb61efa0b.gif
If Snoopy was rear-ended there’s no way he could have seen it coming. The Red Baron was famous for flying out of the sun.
Get a judgment against the dog to pay for the damage. Insurance company garnishes the dog’s (likely nonexistent) wages. To prevent them from coming after you, the owner, begin paying your dog a very low wage. Now, your dog is receiving a dollar every two weeks, which the insurance company takes. You’re paying the repairs at $26/year, plus your insurance doesn’t go up. You win!
(I am not an attorney, but even I am pretty confident this would not work.)
But I drive a manual and I can’t put my car in “park”… what are my rhino related options?
And will this same philosophy work if I’m at the track (in my automatic) and I slam it into park just before I slam it into a wall?
Is the wall coming at you? Are you able to stop before it hits you? What track has these active and aggressive walls? Even then it’s iffy. My dad had a tree fall in front of his log truck and they called it collision despite the difficulty (impossibility) of stopping a loaded log truck in time.
In my limited experience, an animal coming at you will likely be covered as comprehensive regardless, but being stopped ensures they can’t call it collision. (Source: I hit a deer and it was covered under comprehensive, despite my car in motion. YMMV)
I don’t know, but every time I autocross I hit cones that just come out of nowhere. I assume walls can do the same thing.
The best one in my family is one of my Aunt’s was sideswiped by a dog sled. Most common question “Were the dogs ok?”
Summary, dog sled driver was found at fault.
I feel you brother one Christmas my grandma got runover by a sled pulled by reindeer by a man who not only drove a sleigh but played with elves.
I skipped the parenthetical; now in desperate need of advice regarding driving a rhino I can’t get into park.
If your son won’t learn what isn’t a monster truck, he should at least learn that monster trucks smash empty cars under controlled circumstances.
Also, if he’s around here, I can see some confusion re: what is/isn’t a monster truck. A lot of people jack up their F250s or whatever high enough that it isn’t immediately clear. Doesn’t explain figuring the wagon is one, but the confusion is otherwise understandable.
It’s a big yes from me for any article that mentions a car that came with wicker seating and fringe on the canopy.
Here’s one for you.. When my son was about 5 years old, he woke us up at about 7am on a Saturday to tell us that the garage door was broken. Upon further investigation, it wasn’t really broken, but had tripped on thermal overload from being run up and down repeatedly. Upon investigation, we found the following had occurred while we were sleeping
He had taken a chair from the kitchen, through 2 rooms and doors, and into the garage to be able to reach the garage door opener buttonHe had taken keys to the car from the hooks near the door (also using a chair to reach them) and put them in the ignition of the car in the garage. Luckily it was the keys to the wrong car.He had loaded the car with blankets and his favorite stuffed animals for a road trip.If he had been successful in starting his little road trip, likely ending with crashing the car into either the wall of the garage or a neighbor’s house, what kind of accident would it have been? Also, how fast would CPS have been at our house for our little smarty pants?
Later that day, all our doors got hotel style flip/locks mounted at the very tops of the doors so they were out of reach at night from toddlers, even if they were on a chair.
He’s 20 now, so he made it through childhood.
6 years ago I would have thought this story was made up, but with a 5.5 year old I know you are telling the truth. Kids are capable of way more damage than we give them credit for.
And they are always watching and learning.
Also, apparently bullet points don’t come through in posts and turn into run-on sentences.
I legitimately wonder how young of a kid could figure out how to move a car from points A to B with no prior instruction. I was always mesmerized by people driving standard when I was a kid and I got that you started in first and then moved up from there. But I probably would have been confounded by “press the clutch to turn the key.” Same with an automatic… maybe junior would eventually mash the brake and get it into Drive.
As a young kid asked to move a pickup on a couple occasions, I missed the bit about pressing in the clutch. And the bit about jiggling the shifter. I did not miss the dog house. It survived and the pickup was undamaged.
Better than the time I didn’t know I needed to push the clutch in with the brake to stop. That cost a door and mirror that scraped up against the clothesline pole.
I have a couple older cars that do not require the clutch be pushed in to start. That could cause a problem or two if a kid were to mess with it.
My avatar pic is the result of my wife giving the keys to my then 12-yr-old daughter, thinking “what are the odds she’ll get it STARTED, much less INTO GEAR?!” Well, that and then failing to have her hand on the e-brake handle.
FWIW, insurance paid because this wasn’t really a driving incident (since the child was not a driver on the policy), more of a freak coincidence. Not far removed from an act of dog. We got lucky, I think.
Also, no injuries other than my wife’s embarrassment and my daughter’s aversion to getting behind the wheel ever again.
Remember: A child’s only job is to watch and learn. (Same for most mammals, although most of our pets have enough disconnect to stay out of trouble.)
“It takes a village to raise a child, but an unsupervised child can raze a village in much less time.” – SimCity 2000 instruction manual, I think
Haha. Good for that kid.
When my younger child was less than two years old, my wife put a pair of scissors up on a bookshelf to keep them away from my child. After leaving the room for only 2-3 minutes, she came back to find a children’s chair balanced on a kitchen chair, with our child climbing up onto the top chair! At that moment we knew that child number two would be a difficult one! (Currently 13 years old and still alive with no criminal record or ER visits!)
Also note: This was our child who was slow to start talking. Keep a close eye on the quiet ones!