Earlier today, we all continued our Jag-madness when the first images of the Jaguar Type 00 concept were leaked. Our own genuinely-British car designer gave us a fantastic rundown on the design, but in the released pictures, there was one that I find genuinely confusing. That one up top there. What the hell are we looking at?
The picture in question seems to be showing what is behind a panel just aft of the front wheel arch on the left side of the car. There’s a brassy-colored band below it, emblazoned with the Jaguar leaper, which remains on the bodywork as the body-colored panel opens above it.
You can see the area in question here, where the gold rectangle is:
…and here’s what the panel looks like when opened:
What I want to know is what the hell are we looking at inside there? What are those things?
Are they some sort of fitted luggage? Is that what that thing that resembles a tallish barn on its side is? And is that some kind of thin valise below it? I don’t see any sort of handles or anything so I’m really not sure. If it is luggage, is this access to the front luggage compartment?
If so, is that really the best way to do that? Unless the volume of space in there is really small, why would you choose to have your luggage accessed like this? Is that black corrugated bit a sort of roll-up cover? It looks like some sort of arm that holds the body panel swings out from the black corrugated part, which means the access hole is even smaller, if it is a luggage volume?
Is it equipment of some kind, perhaps some sort of charging equipment? Does a charging cable unfurl from one of those pale-pink whatevers?
I mean, historically, that area of cars can have interesting stuff; for example, the Horch 930 S had a freaking sink that popped out of that area!
…and, of course, that’s where Bristols hid their spare tires:
… but whatever is going on here is definitely neither sink nor tire.
So, what the hell is going on under that panel? I guess we’ll find out at the Jag reveal event tonight, but I want us to guess, dammit. So have at it! Let’s speculate! Speculate like a speculum!
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Just a guess from the history of Jaguar, but that is likely a place to hide the silverware and other items you’ve stolen from a hotel.
Makeup kit and light with stand so you are always insta-ready for your influencing you are doing along with those colorful blokes from that terrible teaser commercial.
It’s a shoe scraper so you can wipe your shoes clean before getting in.
kick starter?
emergency generator pedal?
flush pedal?
Oooh! I LIKE the kick-starter / emergecy generator idea! Maybe it runs a little dynamo so you can “bump-start” your electric car?
Guessing a removable battery pack. Naturally tiny, but maybe the idea is you can swap in one big enough to get home in an emergency?
Or it is just storage, and they choose to put the weirdest shape they could find in there, consistent with the rest of their recent marketing.
It’s the eject button for the battery pack.
As anti-dramatic as it may sound, I suspect it is indeed a charging-related gubbin.
It’s on the driver’s (aka captain’s) side and is clearly designed to be accessible, but it was left quite generic so people don’t freak out about “It has [this charger], it should have [that charger]!!”. Out of a sense of self-preservation, I haven’t looked at the concept closely enough to see if the charge port is elsewhere.
It’s a vintage swamp cooler, just in case you have the guts to drive your new Jaguar across the Sweltering Desert.
No 1950 Pontiac hit Death Valley without one.
Dot matrix printer
It’s some overly-complicated bit of engineering that will never make it into a production car, unless it’s merely designed to do something really unimportant. Or it’s the hood release, in which case you’ll need it on a daily basis…
To riff on Adrian from this morning, this Jag seems increasingly two more wheels away from being a weird attempt to produce Lady Penelope’s car.
You make that sound like a bad thing.
Only if we don’t get to see Parker at some point.
It’s the write protect tab. Copy nothing.
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8d/Cassettes_I_II_IV.jpg
It’s a step for the stoplight windshield washing service provided by the wonderful homeless people that the Jag owner laid off to be able to afford such a gorgeous vehicle.
Erectus Trim
this is a MALE trim Jag
It’s a step, so you can reach across the whole windshield with a short handle squeegee. Or it’s a suspension foot pump to raise the suspension for speedbumps
What The Hell Is This Thing
On The New Jag Type 00?What The Hell Is This Thing OnThe New Jag Type 00? Why?That has to be the “power activator”, just like a light switch, but it’s for your jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag
That’s what I say, I mean it’s a Jag so “turning it off then on again” will be a regular occurrence.
Obviously this is the built-in warmer for when you’re delivering pizzas…
It’s Bri’ish, though, plus it’s a bit small for pizza. Gotta be for pies.
it is a seat. to sit and look at the beautiful landscapes when you are waiting for a tow truck because the doors are locked
It’s the marketing excuses turbo encabulator
It’s a bespoke urn, holding the incinerated remains of Jaguar’s dignity.
it is the printhead to print miles and miles and miles and miles of error codes
This innovative and attractive access port will make it easier to repair rust after the new Jag has depreciated down to “Dayton CraigsList” levels.
It looks like one of those hand blow dryers you see in public restrooms. Not the old school white and chrome ones that barely blow any hot air but the newer fancier ones with blades of air that blow the water from your hands onto your trousers.
I hate those blade dryers. Might as well use your pants.
I much prefer a paper towel