A New Mitsubishi Colt Turbo Is Exactly The Car Mitsubishi Needs Right Now

Despite what you might think from reading my posts, I do not worship Lee Iacocca. I know my glowing praise of his marketing skills might lead you to believe that a framed photo of Lido illuminated by Mustang-shaped candles sits proudly in my living room. This is not the case, but I’ll admit that I can’t seem to say enough about his ability to read not only what the automotive buying public wanted, but what they needed and could afford. Iacocca has been gone for some time now, but does his thinking on cars hold true in today’s world?

In an interview after his retirement when Chrysler was on the ropes once again, Iacocca was asked how, if given the opportunity, he’d save them again. His response? “I’d make small cars that people want to buy.” You might think that’s absolutely not the case today, but recent turns of events make me believe the old Chrysler CEO’s statement once again. Mitsubishi might be just the company with nothing to lose and everything to gain by trying it out.

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Too Late For Too Little?

New small cars have been disappearing in America for some time now; we’ve reported on the impending death of the Mitsubishi Mirage, and the upcoming end of the Nissan Versa. There aren’t a lot of other choices either beyond something like a Hyundai Venue.

However, current factors at play seem to be making the decision to euthanize these models less than prudent. You see, the reasons for the shrinking subcompact car market over the last few decades are starting to disappear, such as:

Low Rates! Zero Percent!
If you could get 72-month low-interest financing, why not get a bigger and more expensive new car? This warmed a car company’s heart because the profit margin ain’t great on an entry-level model. Since the pandemic, much of that sweetheart financing has flat-out evaporated, and we all know that interest rates have risen as well.

Buy A Used … What?
Supply chain issues and a shift in people from leasing to buying means that the used car market is still not a great alternative to a cheap new car.

“I Remember When Gas Cost …”
Cheap fuel made tiny cars pointless before the pandemic, but now absurd gas prices are here to stay. Electric cars? They’re still too expensive, and who cares if they give you a free charger? Most low-end car buyers live in apartments or street-park, so where the hell do they plug it in?

It’s no surprise then that, as our Thomas Hundal pointed out, sales of these little cars were up in the last few months, just in time for the aforementioned Mitsubishi and Nissan models to be discontinued. Maybe Iacocca was right about small cars after all.

Ah, but look at the other part of Lido’s statement: “Small cars that people want to buy.” I seriously doubt anyone really wants to buy a Mitsubishi Mirage; it’s simply the best if not only choice in the price range for a buyer with very limited funds who wants a reliable new car (yeah, I know, as an Autopian if someone says “$16,000″ you’re thinking how much used semi-tragic Porsche you could get for that, but most people aren’t as dumb as we are).

The Mirage’s rather dopey styling screams “this is all I could afford,” and the 78 horsepower engine screams as it tries to put its meager power through a crappy CVT. No, this is a car purchased because you have no other choice.

That’s now how it used to be at Mitsubishi.

Before The dEVOlution Of Mitsubishi

Despite being a “car guy” I really couldn’t tell you if Mitsubishi was still selling vehicles other than that Mirage here in America. I just checked the website right now and realize that the answer is that they do, but it’s been three minutes since I shut the Mitsu website window and I can’t tell you what I just saw. My vague memory was crossover things that I might buy if, say, it was the only affordable Japanese option.

If you’re under thirty, you might find it hard to believe but people at one point purchased Mitsubishis because it was their favorite option. If you’re over forty these cars might be a bit like the band Duran Duran: you might have written them off as superficial flash-in-the-pans but now realize that were actually pretty damn good.

There were so many legit cars like the forgotten Z-fighting turbocharged Starions, the proto-supercar 3000GT, slick Eclipse Turbos, and the Galant VR4 with four-wheel-everything (even steering) that predated the vaunted Lancer EVO models. That’s solid performance credibility right there that Mitsubishi appears to be totally ignoring by making a bunch of milquetoast crossovers.

Even with very small cars, Mitsubishi once had some exciting products that were serious contenders for the hot hatch crown. The ultimate might have been the 1985 Colt Turbo from the time that you could buy a Mitsu at one of the seemingly countless Dodge (or Chrysler/Plymouth) dealerships in America.

The Colt was redesigned for this year with sleek sheet metal; even the front side marker lights were artfully blended into the clean design. With a roof spoiler over the hatch like the one above it was quite a snarky little devil. Under the hood, Mitsubishi offered a turbocharged version of the standard 1.6 Liter four that pumped out 103 horsepower; a zero to sixty time of 9.5 seconds doesn’t seem like much today but was competitive with benchmark VW Rabbit GTI.

In a seemingly redundant move, this Colt was actually also sold at U.S. Mitsubishi dealers as a Mirage in 1985 as well:

The Colt is just a bit longer than the current Mirage, and it’s shorter in height as well, but it’s close enough in size that the stark contrasts are staggering. While the 2024 Mirage is something that I would only choose if it were the last car on the Enterprise lot, that 1985 Colt Turbo looks terrific. In Turbo form it pushes all the buttons for Car You Want To Hoon. Given the choice of this and one of those $2.6 million McLaren P1s, you just know that the Colt would be far more fun to drive as a Real Car in the Real World, terrorizing the neighborhood under the radar.

To me, this is the model that needs to be the inspiration something new that not only makes you care about small cars once again, but that makes you give a shit about Mitsubishi. Here’s a full line of Colts to get you going.

The Hatch Becomes Hot: The GTS Turbo

Let’s start with the basic Mirage and see what we can do to make it more appealing.

I’d make it just a hair bigger to let us add wheels big enough to not be an embarrassment like the rubber-clad thimbles of the current car. We’d then add some retro sheetmetal to simulate the 1985 car, including more glass since people want windows for sunlight even with rearview cameras – do you hear me Elon? Let’s look at the animation:

Naturally, there would be a base model to go well below the $20,000 threshold but I’m focusing on the top-of-the-heap Turbo GTS model with retro “Charcoal Starion” wheels, the no-glare hood and even an electric rear spoiler that could adjust in angle as speed increases just like on that McClaren P1 (but on a vehicle that costs less than 1 percent of the price of that rather-useless-on-the-street hypercar). Notice the giant, well-integrated front side marker lights similar to the original eighties Colt.

Maybe we need to have a three-cylinder option for the Colt similar to the motor in the current Mirage, but I see a need to add a turbo even in base form. I’m certain the average buyer will be happy to sacrifice some economy to get enough performance to keep up with traffic. A four-cylinder would be optional, but the real news would be the turbocharged 245 horsepower motor in the GTS model. In a car that would tip the scales at under 2500 pounds, all the virtual calculators I’ve put the parameters into claim a zero to sixty time of around five seconds or less. Now that’s the Mitsubishi we all remember.

In back, the taillights of the 1985 car are mimicked in the hatch, with wraparound side marker lights matching the front ones holding repeater lamps for the taillamps since the main lights will be invisible with the hatch open (or rear fog lights for EU markets). Big central exhaust outlets are flanked by backup lamps.

Give It The Boot: EVO Junior GT

You can get a new 2024 Mirage with a trunk, and in the past a Colt 4-door sedan was offered by Dodge dealers even in turbo form:

We’d offer the same body style for the little Colt, including a hopped-up sedan called the EVO Junior. This tribute to the much-loved line of larger Mitsubishi Lancer performance cars could even have a trunk lid wing as on the bigger car:

I do wonder if we might even want to offer a detuned version of this with a similar look for the masses, as was done with the Lancer OZ Rally model; we can laugh at such paper tigers but some people just want the appearance of a fast car. Hell, they’re probably the smart ones and won’t die in a fiery wreck of a 245-horsepower tin can like you or I would do.

LeBaroning The Colt: The Diamante

Another entry in the reimagined car-formerly-known-as-Mirage lineup would be the Colt Diamante sedan (named for the long-ago-discontinued near-luxury Mitsubishi sedan offering) complete with retro wheels.

The Diamante is sort of a reverse Cimarron; you don’t pay for a luxury car name but you get the fancy car goods at a reasonable price. In fact, it’s a formula that American Motors tried quite successfully in their dying days when they turned the old AMC Hornet into the mini-luxury car Concord. A bit more chrome, fancy Landau-style vinyl top and wheels, plush tufty crushed velour seats and (gasp) an LED digital clock gave buyers what they would expect to find only with larger, more upscale cars but in an affordable, compact package.

You can see the rear seat of the stock Mirage, even with the fold-down rear armrest, looks like a very depressing place to be:

Like that AMC Concord fifty years ago, buyers will feel proud to take passengers in their new little car even though it only set them back about half of the $47,000 average that new car cost.

No Tape Deck Though

I tried to simulate the interior of the 1985 Colt as closely as possible, since I think it’s a great design with highly functional knobs sticking out just behind the steering wheel for wipers and lights.

On the new car, a small screen replaces the main cluster, while a smaller one is integrated into the center stack. Odd-looking right-angle-cut air vents sit at the top of the dash, with a Mitsubishi logo acting as the hazard flasher button below.

The modern parts mesh pretty well with the “futuristic” angular look. Let’s face it- if Mitsubishi had the technology back then they would have used it with that aesthetic.

You Don’t Need A $100,000 Car To Endanger Yourself

As if things couldn’t get worse for car buyers on a budget, it appears now that insurance rates are starting to skyrocket. If you thought you could barely afford that new $40,000 retro muscle car, a monthly Allstate or Geico bill that looks a payment on another car will end any thoughts of even considering such a thing.

All the more reason that people need small cars, and they shouldn’t have to make over six figures to buy a new vehicle that’s fun to drive. A car like this Colt Turbo could give you something that would be more amusing on the street than something only a one percenter could purchase, or seventy-year-old who finally has enough money to buy one.

Listen to Lido, Mitsubishi. You offered these kinds of options forty years ago, and it’s about time that you redeem yourselves by doing it again.

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