If the third time is a charm, then I must be pretty damn charming because the deities above are having me write ANOTHER Shitbox Showdown for you. This time, it truly is my pleasure, because we’ve got some goooooood stuff in store for y’all today. As usual though, we need to start by talking about the voting from yesterday, so let’s get into it!
As a reminder, we had a 1991 Isuzu Trooper and a 1987 Nissan Pathfinder. If you recall, I was particularly fond of the Trooper, its beautiful paint job and overall well-maintained quality (at least on the surface), and while the Pathfinder was still a good find in its own right, it had a couple of flaws that might make you pump the brakes.


Sure, the Pathfinder’s seller acknowledged the flaws outright, and they have maintained it decently, but flaws are flaws! Let’s see how y’all voted.
Stunning. I was disappointed in y’all the other day for picking the CR-V over the Element and thought about immediately putting in my two weeks notice, but us largely coalesce around the Trooper makes me think y’all might be alright. I like you. Can we be friends? Maybe? It’s fine if not, my therapist told me I shouldn’t fear rejection and should put myself out there regardless.
Anyways, today’s options. Here’s where I, the only C6 Corvette driver under the age of 30 (or 40 or 50), would put in a Corvette joke but Corvettes are no joking matter considering they’re the superior American motoring machine; you’ll never catch me joking about them. Instead, let’s talk about something else that’s equally not a joking matter: The Samurai.
1987 Suzuki Samurai JX – $3,999

Engine/drivetrain: 1.3 8-valve SOHC I-4 engine, 5-speed manual, 4wd
Location: Apple Valley, CA
Odometer reading: 99,260
Operational status: “Good condition […] runs great”
This thing is serious as a heart attack. This is 2,100 pounds of Japanese greatness, ready to flip its way into your heart. Why do I say it’s gonna flip? Because that’s just what these things do. With its short wheelbase and high center of gravity, these bad boys should be nicknamed Simon Biles the way they flip and do acrobatics and floor routines and other things. Get it? Neither do I. Let’s keep admiring it.

If you recall from yesterday’s showdown of the shitboxes, one thing I mentioned was that I love a good funky trunk, and this one is funked up in all the right ways for me. I dig a safari cloth top whose window you can fold up to leave the rear exposed, and mating that with the swinging trunk door… I dig it. And on the general note of a soft top on your off-roader: do it! My Jeep TJ has one and I absolutely love it, you just gotta make sure you don’t let it dry rot or get stabbed open by a thief and you’re good! Moving on.

Oh boy is that interior unremarkable! But I don’t need this to be remarkable, I just need it to work, and I’ll do the rest. Years ago, I test drove a new Bronco, and while it was clearly a nice machine, having the big ass tablet in the center with CarPlay and optional tire cameras to inform you of tire placement on the trail really turned me off. On one hand, it’s the classic case of another expensive thing to repair when it fails, and on the other hand, I was gonna buy this thing to off-road and destroy. All those creature comforts would make me hesitate to take it on trail for fears of damaging it.
Not this though. This Samurai I would destroy in a heartbeat. Or at least I’d try.

I mean, just look at this trunk. It’s seen so much abuse as is, you think I’m gonna start caring for it now?! Of course not. This is a thing I take to the bullshit store and do bullshit with; that I hook a 20 mph right turn in and regret all my life decisions as I’m suddenly inverted and looking at the sky and ground and sky and ground again as the almighty Samurai flips its way into the scrapyard. I dig it.

It’s looking like there’s some lovely hand crank windows and likely manual door locks, both keeping with the low cost and comfortability in trashing this thing. I love it! In terms of other notes from the owner: “soft top, newer battery. Start up immediately.” Rad! [Ed Note: This Samurai is too nice to destroy, but it does look like it’d be loads of fun to bash around the trails. -DT].
Boring stats! It has 63 hp and about 73 lb-ft torque, and it looks like it all gets you in the neighborhood of 25 mpg. Solid work! But now, we must talk about an American legend: the indomitable, the gorgeous, the furious, bucking Ford Bronco. Two.
1987 Ford Bronco II – $4,500

Engine/drivetrain: 2.9 Liter V-6 pushrod OHV, 5-speed manual, 4wd
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Odometer reading: 57,750 (kinda suspicious of that number)
Operational status: “RUNS AND DRIVES GREAT !!”
Alright so it’s not actually a Bronco, it’s a Bronco II, but what are you gonna do, sue me? Actually, please don’t. I’m poor and am much better at fighting than I am at sticking up for myself in front of the court, so let’s just go to the local park at three and handle this like a bunch of rapscallions. Deal? Cool. [Ed Note: No violence here. Just car-geekery. -DT].
I titled this one “The Battle of the Rollovers,” so I should inform you that the Bronco II is also prone to flipping more than Simone Biles (shit, I already made that joke; I need to watch more gymnastics). Anyway, its issues were largely the same as the Samurai’s, but let’s see what Motor Trend has to say about it:
“Long before the Ford Bronco II went on sale, the manufacturer was aware of potential rollover issues. Engineers had calculated the Bronco II’s stability index, a calculation based on the center of gravity and track width, and found it was significantly lower than the competing Chevy S-10 Blazer, and slightly lower than the Jeep CJ-7. Sure enough, Ford Bronco IIs had already started to go shiny-side-down in testing. So great was the concern that Ford eliminated certain maneuvers from the testing program in the name of its drivers’ safety.”
Wait, the thing flipped so much Ford straight up banned certain tests to make it look normal on paper? Crazy. Anyways, more photos.


Yeeeesh. This seller is certainly no Henri Cartier-Bresson or Griffin Riley with a camera, huh? Well let’s talk about what we’re seeing.
I’m a sucker for that nice old brown carpet around the (manual!) transmission tunnel, mainly because it looks like the carpets I’d sleep on at home as a baby because my parents didn’t care enough to set me in the crib like any other self respecting parent would. The driver and passenger seats look like they’d be comfy in all the right ways, and, while it looks like rear leg room is trash, it still has some solid backseats ready to host your friends when they wanna go on a rollover, I mean drive.

We’re looking at some hand cranked windows again and manual locks and I’d like to say the little 8-ball they have on the lock is adorable. I also feel like I’ve never consciously noticed a car with the door’s interior painted the same as the exterior [Ed Note: Some old cars left some un-covered steel in the door panels – my Jeep J10 for example. -DT]. I’m used to seeing generic plastic cover the doors, so the touches of yellow in the interior make me smile. Maybe it’s because it reminds me of my late sister (not dead, she’s just not punctual) whose favorite color is yellow, or more realistically I just think it’s rad and my sister has no weight in the matter.

No spare tire! And a bit of chipped paint on the edge of the roofline. It sucks not having a spare because now you’re either stuck with buying a new one or perpetually hoping you never have a blowout on your primary four, but the paint I’m fine with.
In terms of what the seller is telling us, they’re saying it’s got power steering, brakes, and AC (but also said “(need a charge)”) so note that as you will. It’s got a clean title, too, so we don’t have to worry as much as we did with the Pathfinder from yesterday! I dunno, it sounds like this thing might be alright in the end.
Stats time! Its power plant gets you 140 hp and 170 lb-ft torque. I’m struggling to find info about its fuel efficiency, so let’s just imagine numbers instead! Six, 13, 527! That was fun. Oh and it has a curb weight of 3,385 lbs.
[Ed Note: Here you go:

Could be worse. -DT]
So there you have it: two cars that roll more than uh….(don’t say Simon Biles, don’t say Simon Biles) a blunt in California? Nailed it.
Personally, I dig the Blue Oval a bit more, but purely out of nostalgia. I learned to stick on a Bronco II my dad mostly restored on his own and that he forced me to sell because, get this, he didn’t want me to “roll over” in it. Crazy talk.
Whether you fancy the tiny off-roader out of Japan that will take you on a tumble down the mountain, or its unloved American counterpart that will treat you all the same, you’ve got options here. What do you think? A Samurai or a Bronco?
I’m take the Suzuki for a few reasons, I grew up with them and as a kid liked that they just felt like a cheaply made toy (especially compared to the Daihatsu F60) also I would love to swap a 13B into one of them.
Back when these things were discovered to roll, dealers started unloading them as quick as they could. I think I remember brand new ones selling for 6k or something like that. Well, spooked by the negative press I went another direction and ended up upside down (figuratively) in a series of bad used cars. Meaning, I totally regret NOT buying a Samurai because the path I followed was WORSE than buying the worst new car on the market.
I recall the Suzuki Samurai every time I bend over and my back hurts. Really, the car had virtually no suspension and firm upholstery. I had a new one when I lived on the island of Crete. Interesting place. I lived not far from where they filmed “Zorba the Greek.” The last time they paved the roads was when they filmed the movie. Essentially Cretian roads are thinly interconnected potholes. The Samurai let you closely experience each one. Additionally you could feel every rock, pebble, grain of sand, proton, Higgs Boson. Each impact would be directly transmitted to your spine. It was maneuverable and fuel efficient. Easy to park in the Minoan designed parking in Crete. It just destroyed your spinal column.
The Ford Bronco II, well I recall looking out my office window watching one of my employee’s Bronco burst into flames after he started it and be reduced to a shell in minutes. It looked like we had a mob hit in the parking lot. The fire guys said, “they just burst into flames, they do that sometime.” Kind of in the same deadpan as in “Repo Man” when the Highway Patrolman blew up looking into the trunk.
Nothing against the Samurai, but that Bronco II is the right spec: manual, V6, and yellow.
Leave it to Americans to find a way to kill the Jimny (Samurai). Here in Japan they are cult trucks that people jack up ANOTHER 5 inches.
This is why we don’t get cool stuff anymore.
Too many years ago now a friend and his buddy hit some black ice on one of the major highways in New Hampshire and ended up with their Bronco II either sideways in the snow bank or on its roof. After they convinced the state troopers they had not been drinking, they all got together and using human power flipped it back onto 4 wheels, and drove off into the sunset. Not sure if this means to avoid because it is tipsy, or to go for it because it came away from a tip over unscathed.
Surprised you didn’t use a Limp Bizkit reference in your article, Griffin. 🙂
Purely for sentimental reasons, I’m going with the Samurai. Vanity plates will read “Kurosawa.”
Oh man that Samurai has my heart. All day long.
Car and Driver said the little guy got to 60 in 18.7 seconds and topped out at 77 mph. I guess I could live with that, if I had to pick.
https://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/a42396790/1986-suzuki-samurai-jx-by-the-numbers/
I see absolutely nothing lovable or cool about the big dumb Found On Road Dead.
That Sumari would be great for pulling behind the RV and finding trouble with near the campground.
Samurai has been the scariest ride of my life. Coming down the hills in Malibu with bad breaks, slipping clutch and a high center of gravity was almost beyond my control. I have never and will never drive one again.
Bronco II, the lesser of evils
Any vehicle driven that way would scare someone haha
Bronco, only because Hagerty thinks their value will go up.
Company that benefits from increasing classic car prices, trying to inflate car prices? When are they going to get to the fucking Mondial?
If they’re correct I may have a jumpstart on investment-grade topple-happy Broncos here in Appalachian Bumblef__k. So I can then get in on a Mondial before the bump.
The Bronco so I can roll with my homies.
For me its two projects:
The Suzuki would make a fun weekend off-road excursion sort of deal, beginners in the towing of 4×4 off-roading.
The Bronco II gives me kinda compact overlanding on the cheap vibes…then I realize there are better vehicles for that at 4.5K
Suzuki.
Just wondering I have rolled a Honda Civic, it did 3 flips. Are these better or worse than a Civic?
I would have gone rolling more often than Snoop Doggs refer roller.
Also pick a gymnast from the period. Google it. Nadia Comeniche.
Frankly It’s a toss up for me so the yellow sold it for me on the Bronco. Sorry Griffith gotta swipe left on the friend request. I had what you might call a difficult relationship with a young lady with the last name Riley so not again. Frankly I don’t see the problem getting a spare for this just hit FB or the junkyard. My worry about the Sammy, also the name of a sandwich, is if you put big tires to off-road the 73 hp only has enough power to rock climb no desert runs
Sammy! No question! Those things are awesome!
If you drive it like a 911, it’s going to flop. If you have any sort of situational awareness, you’ll know how much speed is too much on corners.
Picking the samurai because that thing is adorable. I want to pinch its little cheeks
It’s the suzi for me. I’ve got a soft spot for that vintage ranger and bronco ii, but I really like the sami’s and I’d rather have the soft top.
I used to get so irritated by people calling the Sami a rollover machine. Especially with that bullshit pulled by consumer reports. Now that I’ve been in one on it’s roof, I get a little less irritated. However, I’d still take one over the Bronco II. At least the Sami is a monster on the trails.
The author is younger than the CS stunt that cost us those vehicles in this market, so maybe they get a pass. Maybe. Then again, as a journalist…. ha, never mind.
I like both, but I think I’m way more likely to fit my 6’3″ self into the bronco, so going with that.
You’d be surprised, Suzuki is pretty good about that stuff. I’m 6’3″-6’4″ish and I fit in a sami pretty damn well. My winter daily is a 2nd gen Vitara, no space issues what so ever.
Ah, good to know! Thanks.
I’m a Ranger guy, so obviously going with the BII, even with that terrible yellow respray.
Just saw a vintage ranger at Sheetz the other day. It looked good the owner told me it had over 200,000 miles and he uses it to deliver firewood.
Samurai. Always wanted a nice lightweight 2-seater convertible that’s exciting to drive, though this might be a different kind of excitement than I originally had in mind.
I’ll take the Bronco II. I had one of these years ago that I put a 4″ suspension lift and 33’s on. The thing looked just like a Stomper.
It was a total pavement princess though. I didn’t feel comfortable taking that thing on a dirt road let alone a trail. Lol
Just to annoy David, I’m going to do two Corvettes when I get back…
As far as these two go, I’ve had a fair amount of wheel time in both, and it comes down to usage. If you need it to actually serve as a car, you want the Bronco. It rides a lot better, and it won’t scream for mercy at 70 MPH. If you want a toy, the Samurai is a whole lot more fun to just bomb around in.
Gimme the Sami. I already have a kick-ass daily driver.
If you REALLY wanna irk DT, let Griffin pick a Corvette for EVERY day when you get back. And then we all vote only for them.
Corvettes suck unless you are talking about the ship. The true American boner car like the 911 in Europe.