It might not surprise you to hear that I have a lot of quirks. One of my wife’s least favorite ones is my inability to remember anyone’s name while at the same time knowing the exact make, model, year, color and option packages of the car that they drive.
Personally, I think that’s a great skill, since cars are the true window to the soul. Based on the vehicle a person owns, I can almost immediately tell if they’re confident or insecure, frugal or deeply in debt (note that I didn’t say “rich” or “poor”, since the painfully rich usually drive crap), and even if they have as many automotive screws loose as me. Let’s face it; if a parent shows up at my kid’s birthday party driving a beat up E90 stick station wagon, who gives a shit what his name is? We’re gonna be best friends.
Thanks to this strange skill of mine, with movies and television I’m a really harsh critic of car casting, particularly in smaller, supporting roles. Some get it just right while others flub it. Here’s some examples:
The show Breaking Bad really deserved some kind of award for car casting. The producers barely made any missteps, with the possible exception of Skylar’s Jeep Grand Wagoneer which is a bit too much of a “classic” car for a struggling family to own (a beat-up and worthless ZJ or WJ Grand Cherokee would have been a better choice). Everyone talks about the casting of Walter White’s Aztek as genius, but I think it might be too “niche” and trying too hard to be uncool. No, some of the bit players are better. Like this:
One of the best has to be dirty-deed-doer Mike Ehrmantraut’s black Chrysler Fifth Avenue. As we’ve mentioned before, Chrysler sedans always have an air of menace about them. Black Lincolns or Cadillac sedans are intimidating, but a Chrylser following you means your ass is certain to get kicked. The Volare/Lebaron-based Fifth Avenue is a bit pathetic compared to the Imperials of days past, and the condition is less than steller. That perfectly fits Mike’s character, an older guy that might be a bit past his prime and doing tasks he never thought he would, but sure as shit will get the job done, dammit.
The 1984 film Repo Man is a cult classic that featured the late, great Harry Dean Stanton so you can already guess that it was bizarre. The movie ultimately centered around an old, rather generic car with a strange, other-worldly cargo in the trunk.
The rather colorless 1964 Chevy Malibu was perfect: the kind of ubiquitous, almost-invisible car you’d see plying the streets of early eighties LA. Today, you’d cast a twenty-year-old bronze Camry with faded hood a dented bumper corner in the role.
The rather colorless 1964 Chevy Malibu was perfect: the kind of ubiquitous, almost-invisible car you’d see plying the streets of early eighties LA. Today, you’d cast a twenty-year-old bronze Camry with faded hood a dented bumper corner in the role.
To be honest, I found the lead character in the series Californication a bit insufferable. Hank Moody (played by X-Files actor, JFK Jr classmate and Yale PhD candidate David Duchovny) is a New York writer who moves to California with his family and tries to nurse his writer’s block with a slow descent into booze, drugs, and women. The degrading condition of the once-glamorous car that he purchases on his arrival to LA–a black Porsche 964 Cabriolet–matches the arc of the protagonist.
Like Hank, the car seems to get cooler as the filth and battle scars accumulate; far more so than if it were immaculate with a hokey personalized plate. Also, regardless of appearance both car and character can still function well enough to complete the tasks at hand.
What are similar Emmy- or Oscar-worthy car castings you can think of? Remember, you’re Autopians so forget even thinking about mentioning Bandit or KITT Trans Ams, A-Team Vans, Bluesmobiles, Delorean time machines. Other websites might be good with it but don’t bring that weak shit in here, people!
I’m talking about more obscure selections of vehicles that just perfectly enhance the characters and mesh with their raison d’etre. Don’t be afraid to call out some sacred cows either, like how could Jim Rockford afford new Pontiac Firebirds every year when he rarely if ever got paid for his work? Right?
A weird car for a weird character in a weird movie: 1968 Daimler Limousine used by one Mr. Tiny in Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant.
Any of the cars in this masterpiece, there’s some crazy action!
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0052293/
1957 Peterbilt 281 from the movie Duel.
I was going to say the Plymouth Valiant from Duel, but I like your answer better.
Poor Jack Nicholson’s Grosser in The Witches of Eastwick.
And also – lost but not forgotten – the sound pulling the handbrake does on every French car in every French detective series.
Allegedly, he bought it off the studio after filming and had it restored, owned it for years afterward
It’s in the Peterson Museum collection now
Speaking of Jack: his 1963 Mercury Monterey with the Breezeway rear window in Five Easy Pieces. Another cool car in that is Susan Anspach’s 1966 Volvo Canadienne. Funny that old Volvos have been the car of choice for girls-who-aren’t-like-other-girls since at least the 70s.
Yep, the perfect ride for Bobby Dupea. And he was pretty easy with a bumper jack and lug wrench in his own self-expectant, indifferent way. Note: this is one of my top five films.
It’s special to me because I relate to Bobby more than I’d like to, which I believe was the point.
The Gran Torino the Dude drives in the Big Lebowski. That scene where he smashes into the dumpster will ALWAYS make me laugh
The Chrysler New Yorker Ricky has in The Trailer Park Boys. Love that scene where he clears all the junk off the car with a hockey stick
I was going to mention Cyrus’s red C3 Corvette as well. Nothing says “phony tough guy” like a late-malaise C3 with zero improvements, especially after you spray-paint “CYRUS IS A DICK” on the side.
The initial dichotomy and eventual mutual awfulness of the “Shitmobile” and Jim Lahey’s similar-vintage-but-initially-nice New Yorker Brougham (Imperialn’t), too.
Edit: Rest in peace, John Dunsworth.
I have seen almost exactly Mr. Lahey’s New Yorker for sale at least twice, on opposite ends of the continent – once in Oregon in 2016, and another one in south Alabama a couple of years ago after moving to Florida. This one was in Oregon:
https://imgur.com/fTOOQqF
Came here for the Gran Torino. I would also add Walter’s 1985 Chevy van.
Ginger’s Mercedes 450SL and Ace’s Cadillac Eldorado in Casino. Fits their respective personalities perfectly.
Late in the film, she rams the rear end of the Eldorado with her Benz in a fit of rage. Neither car is really affected because of the massive bumpers they both have, a metaphor for her being unable to go after Ace in conventional ways and forcing her to find alternatives.
The cars in Season 2 of Fargo are all cast well, Peggy’s 1965 Corvair comes to mind.
Never seen the series but the Oldsmobiles were perfect in the film. The tru-coat dealership scene had to be the most accurate portrayal of buying a car ever.
2 Days In The Valley has great car casting. The cops in their squarebody Caprice, Allan’s E36 convertible (which I guess would be the hero car), Audrey’s Morris Minor, an Infiniti J30 (can’t remember if it was Charlize Theron’s car or Teri Hatcher’s), and a Buick Century that gets blown up.
The Audi S8 and Mercedes 6.9 in “Ronin.”
The Land Rover in “The Gods Must be Crazy.”
The Sunbeam Tiger in “Get Smart.”
I always liked the choice of S-Class and Continental for the race in Meet The Parents. The smug doctor owns the S-Class, while the retired CIA agent and veteran also has a luxury sedan, but insists on it being domestic.
Also love the green Suburban that Schwarzenegger drives in Jingle All The Way.
https://productplacementblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/GMC-Suburban-Green-Car-Used-by-Arnold-Schwarzenegger-in-Jingle-All-the-Way-7.jpg
I think Hank Moody was very, very sufferable. For someone who – NO MATTER what he did – was ALWAYS guilty of something (I gave up trying to figure out what about haflway trough episode two) in the eyes of his constantly brooding and always right wife, he was holding on tight.
I will hold him personally responsible for single-handedly unleashing an endless string of series and movies where the man is always wrong and the woman is right no matter what (the episode of The Cleaner where the main lady starts yelling at the guy who risked his life to save hers from an explosion while they are basically still rolling from the shockwave and his hairs are still smoldering, educating him on how she’s an strong independent woman taking care of her own shit and that he can’t do that to her, is an absolutely priceless jewel in this regard), but he’s otherwise very much ok.
Also, Hank’s cars in Californication pretty much sum up his own self, as the second he got a brand new 911 he got carjacked and beaten out of it and out of his manuscript, reverting the the older shitty but attaching 911 self.
AT LEAST the carjackers didn’t blame him and guilt trip him about stealing his car and beating his ass, which was a step above what his wife was doing.
The irony being that today his 964 would probably be worth more on BaT than the newer one.
https://www.imcdb.org/ The Internet Movie Cars Database. This may help.
“ how could Jim Rockford afford new Pontiac Firebirds every year when he rarely if ever got paid for his work? ”
Which reminds me of the Lola T70 police cars in THX1138. Why? Because they are Jim’s Lola T70s. And what could be cooler than a T70? Well maybe the Triumph Bonneville T120s with the Avon fairings. Can’t drive in the broadway tunnel in San Francisco without thinking about want one of them.
Lola T70s always seemed like perfectly reasonable cars to daily drive, right?
I think we, the viewers,were meant to believe he was driving the same Firebird multiple seasons in a row on a sort of “floating timeline” thing.
At one point, late in the run, they were at least swapping 1978 front clips onto 1979 and 1980 models to stop making it so obvious
I read that James Garner supposedly hated the new nose on the 1979 model which is why that model never appeared. Also, if you’re a fan you probably already know this but the cars were really Formulas under the Esprit body but Garner thought Rockford likely couldn’t afford a Formula.
Hell, he couldn’t even afford to rent a lot in an actual trailer park to put his house. Always wondered how that arrangement worked, did he somehow tap his plumbing into the neighboring restaurant’s sewer line, or was he using a garbage bag and a bucket the whole time?
To me, those vehicles still scream futuristic dystopia so well. I love the insinuation in the movie that the Lola is powered by some futuristic turbine engine of some sort.
There were many cars in the series, but i thought they did a great job matching cars to people in The Americans. A typical American sedan for the family car and a new (for the period) Camaro for the middle aged husband, just made sense for Russians attempting to blend in. There are more examples but those are the most obvious.
I forgot about this. The cars were heavily GM biased, but they all fit the characters perfectly. When playing characters, you would occasionally see Rhys driving a 280Z if he was trying to impress the younger crowd.
I was going to respond with this, but glad to see that someone else beat me to it. The sedan was a Delta 88, which (like you mentioned) would have been the absolutely perfect vehicle for Russian spies to blend in with everyone else in the early/mid 80’s. Later in the series when Phillip semi-retired from spying and grew the travel agency, the choice of a Lincoln Continental Mark VII was really, REALLY good – luxury/performance but not a more obvious and flashier German car.
Malcom in the Middle. The late 80’s Chrysler minivan and Dodge Dynasty, and Ford Tempo were perfect in the early 00’s to highlight how the family didn’t have money.
Also the BMW Isetta was the perfect car for Steve Urkel in Family Matters.
And how about the car that Malcolm became a slave to and almost killed him in the garage ?
If I could dedicate half the national debt to a mandate of making one MITM episode per day forever, without a drop of quality, I’d gladly do it.
Frankie Muniz just posted the other day on IG that MITM is coming back! Jane and Bryan were in the video too. I’m hoping this is real.
Wonder how that impacts his NASCAR career.
“Did I do thaaat?” Yup, perfect car for him. I grew up watching TGIF and still like that show
Can we talk about John Candy’s onscreen cars?
From Planes, Trains, and Automobiles to Uncle Buck. Seems he has a vehicular style.
That big brown backfiring Mercury perfect fit Uncle Buck! I’m also a fan of his Harley police bike in Armed and Dangerous.
“Have you ever heard of a tune-up? hehehehe!”
Too many to mention with the Sopranos. Tony’s Suburban (although I personally never thought the Escalade suited him), Carmela’s E320 Wagon, Paulie’s CTS, AJ’s Xterra. God, I need to rewatch that show.
My only problem with AJ’s Xterra was that whole episode about the exhaust catching grass on fire felt like a PSA or after school special.
Well, he got an E46 M3 out of it after his wannabe depression, so there’s that.
I believe “Mine is the last face you’ll see before you die, not Tony’s” in a brand new Class S while the blinkers were clicking with a German accent was also a very solid automotive moment.
And part of the sentence made it straight to poor Septa what was her name in Game of Thrones.
Mob guys like to show off, so it isn’t out of character that he buys an Escalade eventually.
Tony was a bit smarter about things than say Christopher who buys an LS400 and a Range Rover when he isn’t even a made man.
Johnny Sack drives the S-Class and then a Maserati after he becomes boss – pretty on brand for him I think.
Paulie has an assortment of Cadillacs through the series.
Junior has a black Town Car, fitting for an old school guy to still be driving (or owning…we only see Bobby drive it) a big Lincoln.
I think the Stair Car in Arrested Development is a perfectly ridiculous car for a family with sinking fortunes.
At least there’s always money in the banana stand.
ANUSTART
Seth Rogen’s 1988 Hyundai Excel in “Knocked Up”. Total P.O.S. but it fit the character just right
I much prefer his Cadillac Brougham in Pineapple Express. The peak stoner car is something ultra comfy, slow and cheap.
Hyacinth and Richard’s Honda based Rover in Keeping Up Appearances. Utterly pretentious and yet very common underneath, just like Hyacinth.
https://live.staticflickr.com/881/40561606525_bc18e4677a_b.jpg
Oh, and Enslow’s Cortina and Elizabeth’s Metro are perfect, too.
And Onslow’s backfiring Cortina! And his (?) Hillman Avenger garden ornament:)
“Mind the pedestrian!”
Columbo’s Peugeot 403 convertible. Neither the convertible top nor his trench coat fit well.
Tubbs’ Cadillac was perfect for his undercover car. And while we’re talking Vice I still believe that Crockett’s Fauxrari Daytona was a much better fit than the authentic Testarossa they gave him later. However, in Season 3 they have an episode called “Viking Bikers from Hell” which should already tell you how that’s going but anyways the super evil biker gang spreading villainy at levels never before seen consisted of just 3 guys on small japanese bikes. And not even the best japanese bikes, the head of the gang is on a ’83 CB550SC Nighthawk when the CB650SC was the bigger and arguably better bike in the Nighthawk family but honestly he should have been on a CB1100F if not a Harley.
Speaking of Harleys, Arnold’s stolen Harley in T2 was a better fit than the CB750 he presumably stole in the original Terminator but I think we can all agree that Sarah Connor’s Honda Elite scooter with pop-up headlight was the much better pairing.
Ponch and John’s later rides, Firebird and Stepside, were a better fit than the Mini Cooper and RV from the early seasons.
Same but in my head I always assumed that was left over from when they were younger or maybe it was a hand-me-down from a family member.
I’ve been sporadically re-watching CHiPs over the past 2 years and I really wonder what the producers were going for with John’s Mini and vanity plates.
The worst was Steve McLeish’s Jaguar SS100. I’m sure it was a replica and it sort of fit his pretentious character but he and John just looked ridiculous tooling around in that thing.
The whole Steve McLeish thing was downright bizarre, esp. as (at the time) we all knew him as that world famous athlete from the Wheaties box.
That was a few episodes where they didn’t want to pay Eric Estrada.
And in fairness, it was no worse than when they replaced John with a druggie and a dubious-about-the-whole-thing pro motorcycle racer.
Yeah but that lasted longer
I nominate any of the malaise-era Detroit iron on CHiPs that would consistently explode when overturned or rear-ended.
Gas gauge barely touches the ‘E’ and that car’s gonna do a barrel roll and burst into flames, guaranteed.
You can actually tell when the smash-up scene was coming up: you start to notice more and more older and worn-out vehicles showing up on the highways prior to the accidents and mishaps.
Vince Gilligan has a real knack for pairing up people with cars. In addition to the 5th Avenue, Walter White’s Aztek, Jimmy McGill’s Suzuki Esteem, Jesse Pinkman’s Fiero/Tercel/Monte Carlo…
That was Badger’s Fiero!
D’oh!
The Fiero in Dicktown is also perfectly deployed.
Yeah, but Walter White somehow had a 2012 Chrysler 300 SRT-8 in a scene that took place in 2009
Dude had connections.
Jessica Fletcher’s bicycle.
Game over. You win!
I was always partial to the Seinfeld episode “Puerto Rican Day” where fellow comic Mario Joyner’s character and Jerry Seinfeld have a traffic standoff and Jerry just keeps calling him “Maroon Golf!” Since I had a Golf at the time, it was like vindication for my car choice. I also worked at Kenny Rogers Roasters. True story.
Jon Voight’s LeBaron is disappointed.
Ford LTD with a built 429 in White Lightning:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5L0iLZnCzA
1957 Chevrolet Bel-Air Sports Sedan (This movie made me love this body) in Thunder and Lightning:
https://youtu.be/MuF2cZl6R9A?si=whLfP2iieqnVAZpP&t=184
And for a more modern take: Any car from Gattaca. Because as my dad described. “When every car is electric, why can’t you choose whatever style you want from history?” DS Decapotable, Studebaker Avantis, and Rover P6s.
I used to live a couple of blocks down the street from a used car lot that would have the odd “classic” from time to time. One day I’m coming home from work, and holy crap, there’s a Gator McKlusky tribute car parked out back – a big brown LTD on steelies. I stopped by for just a brief walk around, and there was even a big ol’ chrome Hurst shifter sticking out of the trans tunnel where it didn’t “belong.” That rig was like a lightning bolt of nostalgia that transfixed me and held me in place.
Ah sweet. Yeah I would love to find an old Police Interceptor LTD.
But sources say that is from a 71-73 Mustang with a four speed for close-ups. There are shots where Gator uses a Column shift on the actual car.
Al Bundy’s Dudge (I think) Duster was always perfect.
You know he once scored 4 touchdowns in a single game at Polk High.
Someone joked that it’s hard to believe that a shoe salesman at a mall could afford a car and house, especially when the house shown was actually in the northern Chicago suburbs (it’s in Deerfield) and lists today for over $600,000.
they also repeatedly show that the house is dilapidated, a neighborhood eyesore, is built directly on top of an unremediated landfill, and the Bundys are so broke that even having any piece of food at all in the kitchen is a rarity. They’ve got the cheapest, least desirable (probably nearly unsaleable) house in the neighborhood, and it seems like whatever portion of Al’s pay isn’t spent on Peggy’s bon-bons is going to the mortgage, leaving nothing for anything else.
That was before trickle down economics really took hold ????
I don’t know how expensive that area would have been in the late 80’s, but in certain parts of the country, “retail sales” used to be a profession where people could make a decent living. Now it is just a race to the bottom to lower labor costs and juice the stock price.
In the Rust Belt town I went to college in, I worked with adults who owned homes and had very middle class lives from working at Staples and selling appliances. 20+ years ago at this point.
It was a ’72 Plymouth Duster, but they always referred to it as a Dodge